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yoooo i think this might be the longest chapter yet, and I started planning the other ones. i want to finish some more and queue them or something idk
baz pov again
I was leaving practice Monday night when I got the call. Fiona hadn’t sounded that distressed since my mother died, which is how I knew something was wrong.
Everything had been going so well for me, too. My grades were up, we had just enough boys to compete this year (and our first meet was this Saturday), Snow and I practiced together every morning and night and we’d started walking places together. Not saying anything, but that meant that we weren’t fighting. I could feel myself want to start a fight with him, because with him being this nice to me I was screwed. I couldn’t get him out of my head.
Even as I drove through the night to Hampshire to see Mordi in the hospital, I couldn’t stop the images of Snow that were running through my head.
Snow laughing at early morning practices. Snow trying to do the fly again (he secretly loved it. I could see it. He wanted to beat out Dev as the first seat flyer by the end of the season, which would be an incredible feat). But he had the shoulders for it.
I tried to ignore the images of Snow running around in that tight bathing suit. It was torture. I’m honestly glad I didn’t have to swim so close to him in the afternoons too; I would lose it.
He wasn’t in the sixth lane anymore, though. Our morning practices were helping. He’d moved up to the fourth lane. His technique was impressive; he had learned surprisingly fast. His endurance wasn’t up to par yet (but neither was mine, we were still building yardage at practice). And I’d caught him and Gareth trying to lift together in the gym one Saturday (at least I wasn’t the only one smitten with the golden boy; a number of girls in our class had been watching through the windows). I even saw Wellbelove walk past and take a second glance.
I wanted to tell her to fuck off.
By the time I reached the hospital at three in the morning, visiting hours were over. I should’ve expected that. Fiona had even told me to wait until morning. I didn’t really have the self-control at this point (all of my self-control went into not kissing Snow at morning practice).
I banged on the doors until security threatened to make sure I wouldn’t be allowed inside once the doors opened in the morning, so I kicked over the nearest garbage can. I napped in my car until Daphne knocked on my car window.
“Basil, the hospital just opened.” She called through the glass. I stalked inside behind her and my father.
He still wasn’t speaking to me, but I didn’t mind too much because conversations with my father had never been particularly pleasant. When he found out I was gay, it was just another disappointment to add to the list.
The hospital seemed deathly quiet as we made our way to Mordelia’s ward. The only noise was Daphne’s clicking heels and soft elevator music playing in the background. It made me itch; I would rather it was silent.
Nurses and doctors all blended together as they rushed from point A to point B. everything was white and sterile and mute. All the smells and sounds and colors blended together. I ignored the rumbling in my stomach and followed Daphne into a blank, white-walled room. The room felt as dead as the rest of the hospital. The only sound was soft breathing and the persistent beep of machines. I hated hospitals.
Mordelia was just waking up when we walked in, so we all tried to stay quiet. When my father and Daphne went to talk to the doctors, I took a seat next to Mordi on the bed. I watched her chest rise and fall as the nurse quietly checked her vitals and checked the drip she was hooked up to.
I hated seeing my sister like this. She looked so vulnerable. I decided to keep that to myself (even if she was dying, she’d summon the strength to punch me for a comment like that). Her eyes fluttered open, and she greeted me with a wide smile.
“What happened?” I asked. She looked sickly and pale still. Fiona had been very vague over the phone about what had landed my eleven year old sister in the hospital.
“Dehydration. I got the stomach bug at school and kept throwing up.” She shrugged, “At least I keep to keep missing school.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. I laid down next to her and snuck her her phone from Daphne’s purse. We snickered as she scrolled through her instagram, taunting the other girls from her school. She hated her all-girls boarding school, but Daphne had insisted. I missed hanging out with my sister during the summer. I rarely got to talk with her during the school year. The rest of our siblings were still too young to hold an intelligent conversation.
Around eleven thirty the nurses brought Mordelia some lunch and I remembered how hungry I was. It was lunchtime at Watford and I had skipped breakfast. I also needed to get back. Even if I left now, I probably wouldn’t make it back in time for the start of practice. I definitely couldn’t miss another day of classes. Dev and Niall had been texting all day in a groupchat i’d forgotten we had.
(07:23) Dev: mate where the fuck r u
(07:23) Niall: fucking answer would you
(09:02) Dev: bazzzzzzzz
(09:20) Niall: i stg mate
(010:36) Niall: your cars gone where the fuck did you go
(011:50) Baz: tell coach im sick
(011:54) Dev: hes not gonna believe that. youre never sick
(011:55) Dev: where did you go
(012:14) Dev: are you fucking with me
I didn’t bother trying to find Daphne and my father before I left, but I did send Mordi a bouquet of flowers from the gift shop for when she woke up again. Hopefully Daphne wouldn’t notice her phone gone from her bag. I’d text her later, I promised myself as I hopped back in my car.
I cranked up the volume and kept my eyes on the road, praying they wouldn’t close on me before I reached Watford.
I stumbled back to the dorms across campus in the dark, ignoring the small groups of giggling drunks trying to be discreet, hushing and tripping over each other in the moonlight. I could smell the alcohol from halfway across the courtyard. I figured at this point the teachers just didn’t really give a shit.
I winced as the dorm door creaked, I prayed Snow would sleep through it. Unfortunately, he had always been a light sleeper and he was staring at me when I walked in. He was sitting straight up in bed, he had obviously been asleep: his curls were everywhere. I stifled a laugh and switched on his lamp so I didn’t trip over his dirty clothes. The soggy bathing suits that had been added to his collection of dirty clothes meant that our room always smelled vaguely of chlorine.
“Where the fuck were you?” He growled. I couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so angry with me (maybe when I held hands with Agatha?). There was fire in his eyes, and it might’ve been the exhaustion, but I could almost see steam coming out of his ears.
“What?” I raised an eyebrow at him. Other than smirking, that was the one thing sure to set him off. I’m convinced it only pisses him off so much because he can’t raise one eyebrow (despite the number of times I’d overheard him insist that Bunce teach him how).
“I waited for you all morning at the pool! And then you never showed up to practice either! What the hell Baz?”
I could feel anger bubbling inside me, “I was busy.” Selfish bastard. I kicked his shoes aside, and made my way towards our bathroom.
“Where did you go?” he was still seething. Snow never knew when to let things go, did he?
I didn’t even realize he enjoyed morning practices that much. I ignored the way my heart lurched at the possibility. The possibility that maybe he enjoyed our time together.
“None of your fucking business, Snow.” I rolled my eyes and tossed my jumper on the bed. The stress of the day was getting to me. I was just happy Mordi would be okay. Eventually, I mean; she still looked like hell when I saw her. At least it wasn’t serious. Maybe I’d try to drive down and see her again on Sunday. Sunday was the only day we didn’t practice.
“Yes, it is! You promised to train me!” he whined. I wanted to choke him. Or kiss him. I still couldn’t figure out which. And I still couldn’t figure out how I’d managed to fall for someone who drove me so crazy.
I spun around to face him. He was sitting on the edge of his bed now, in his boxers, arms across his chest (he really was starting to look more filled out. His scone-pudge was slowly receding. I couldn’t tell if I liked it or not).
“Alright Snow, fine. I drove to Hampshire to see my sister in the hospital.” I snapped and slammed the bathroom door behind me.
When I came back out Snow was asleep again. Figures. I turned off all the lights, and crawled into bed.
