#loser lord

[parker-112]

Ait olmadığın yerde fark edilmeyi bekleme

[scanning-you-cyborg]

Do yall think Sokka visits Ozai in prison after him and Zuko get married so he can watch Ozai explode in real time.

[the-element-of-hot-leaf-juice]

Greetings, my Phoenix king, today I humbly ask for your knowledge and opinion.

Your previous correspondence led me to ask, what would your ideal spouse/consort/parent of your kids be like? (And I mean a spouse with autonomy/personality and not just the vague "someone who always agrees with me")

Furthermore, I've heard a rumor about you over time. Some say that the reason Zhao, the man responsible for killing the moon and attacking the northern tribe, was able to rise through the ranks so quickly was due to a secret sexual relationship with YOU. I'm curious about your side of the story.

I am sending tea with this letter, but I don't know if the guards will allow the delivery of drinks to prisoners, but i I swear there's no poison in it.

Your obedient servant, Anon.

PS: I thought you'd be angrier that I called Azulon "daddy" than that I called you ex-firelord.

To my correspondent,

I appreciate the title. "Ask", however, is a generous word for this. You do not ask for my knowledge or opinion; you ask to mock me. But I suppose I have nothing better to do than to answer.

You say my previous correspondence invoked a certain curiosity regarding my preferences in a spouse, a consort, and a parent? Why? Do you seek to become one? To begin, those three roles are vastly different.

An ideal spouse? None. Consorts? As many as I desire.

If I must define an ideal, I prefer a woman I can hold on to—not some waif. I like to possess pretty things. I prefer strong ones that have a bit of fire; that is always interesting to play with. I like them to have large assets—things I can find purchase on, things I can leave marks on. Some might say I have a certain affinity for the relatives of past Avatars. Perhaps it's true, I'm yet to lay eyes on one I haven't liked the look of.

I do not believe I have been vague in my previous messages: I prefer someone who is entirely mine. Entirely for me. I deserve that much, do I not? Autonomy and personality are simply not that important to me. I suppose I crave an eager woman, but those are rare. I shall settle for a woman who has to be convinced of my generosity.

Parenthood is a completely different matter. Preferably, a mother's involvement would consist of nothing more than pushing out an heir. Letting them have influence is what went wrong with my current situation. Had I been the sole influence, the outcome would have been far more pleasant—for myself and for them, I imagine. It is their mother’s weakness that is in them, not mine.

As for the rumour—I have no idea where you heard it. I will not entertain you with "my side of the story", as there is no side to tell. I do not even know who this man is. Do you know how many admirals, generals, captains, lieutenants, sages, and councillor's names I have to try and remember? Forgive me if I have forgotten someone, but I can say that that rumour is false. I do not usually have an attraction to men, women tend to have the right kind of shapes that catch my eye and are easier to manage.

I did receive your tea, but it was cold by the time it got to me. I found it quite an insult to be given a tea I could not heat myself. If that was a move in this little game we are playing, then well played.

Please, try harder to provoke me than to invoke my father’s name. I care nothing for that skeletal shell of a man. He cared not for me; I care not for him. If anything is offensive about using the word "daddy" for him, it is that he was not a father at all. At least I tried to pretend with my children. I suppose he had given up on trying by the time I came around.

Next time, instead of tea, send me news. How is my son faring? Not well, I hope. And how is his Advisor? I miss her. I wish she would visit me again. My eyes are tired of looking at cell walls; her visage would be a sweet relief and fond fuel for my hours of reminiscing here.

[justaphantomhuman]

Vladdie + attempts at dating

Bonus: Maddie's reaction

and the no text version of the art below the cut!!

[phantomchick]

Hilarious to me that Severus Snape's patronus form was a doe. I bet he didn't know about the marauders' animagus forms at all before Harry's third year, imagine him yearning after this woman all these years (while bullying her child) to the point where his literal patronus manifestation of positive emotions/happy memories was her and it took the form of the female counterpart to her husband's animagus form. Fail King. Even magic itself was saying she never belonged to him romantically.

[visit-ba-sing-se]

anyhow has Ozai ever been put on trial for his crimes? I am asking for the sole reason that I would love to see the self- proclaimed “Phoenix King” getting roasted in court 

[avatar-firelordzuko]

Sokka : Well, look at you, buster. Now that your Firebending is gone, I guess we should call you the Loser Lord.

Ozai : I am the Phoenix King.

[Ozai collapses] 

Toph : Oh, sorry, didn't mean to offend you, Phoenix King of Getting His Butt Whooped.

Suki : Yeah, or how about King of the... Guys Who Don't Win?

Toph : Leave the nicknames to us, honey.

[stardust948]

So I looked up Ozai in the search engine and my blog showed up.

Guess this is a Loser Lord blog now.