synopsis: your best friend is a little bit of a loser. you still love him! just, um, maybe not quite as platonically as you thought when you catch him jerking off and realize that you might like a lot more than just his personality! how long will it take for you to get another look at what's in his pants? or will you give up before you get a taste of what else he's keeping from you?
pairing: dorky!best friend x horny!reader
wc: 4.7k
content: smut. porn with plot. masturbation, reader catches him jerking off, small misunderstanding, reader scheming to get her man, teasing, flirting, awkwardness, sexual frustration, she wants him bad, mutual pining, he's a bit oblivious, they are both giving loser lol, best friends to lovers, confessions, kissing, oral sex (f!) receiving, fingering, happy ending
PATREON PREVIEW BELOW
Your best friend was keeping a big secret from you.
One that was approximately eight inches long and had a girth of about-
Okay, you hadn’t really approximated that when you were more distracted by how pink his swollen tip was the same shade as his lips as they parted in a low whimper, pre-cum glistening while his fist roughly stroked the base of it.
Your brain went blank. And before you could say or do anything, he somehow picked up on your presence anyway, his head turning to catch you standing in his doorway.
Shame prickling your skin, crawling up your bones as your own mouth dropped open, about to stutter an apology just for him to breathe your name in a strained voice, heat your brain immediately flagged as wrong wrong wrong coiling in your core.
“I-I’m sorry,” you stammered, stepping back and half-slamming the door shut behind you. Closing your eyes only to find the image of him imprinted fully in your head, pumping his unfortunately extremely pretty cock as the way he said your name started looping with it.
You tried to turn it off.
To remind yourself that he was firmly cemented in the box neatly labeled best friend in your heart, but how were you supposed to convince yourself he belonged there when you were suddenly imagining him whimpering beneath you instead?
It wasn’t like you could just fuck him like some stranger and never see him again.
But you also didn’t know how the hell you were supposed to sit next to him on the couch watching anime when you knew what he was hiding in his sweatpants.
You swallowed hard, your throat going dry as you reminded yourself that it wasn’t like he saw you as anything else anyway. You’d caught yourself crushing on him a couple times over the years, considering what he might be like as a boyfriend, but those had been easier to shut down.
He was cute. Considerate. Like a loyal puppy dog who would plop itself by your feet and listen to you talk while you stroked his hair, tail wagging when you told him how much you liked being with him. One that just also happened to be hot in the messy, disheveled dorky way. Hiding a broad frame underneath thick hoodies with cartoon characters on them, pretty blue eyes always squinting at you from his thick glasses he refused to update his prescription for.
As far as you knew, he didn’t go out with anyone, discarding receipts with girls’ numbers on them he tended to receive when you dragged him out to dinner or the movies with the promise of going to one of his favorite stores to buy whatever new game or comic or Lego set he liked afterwards. You befriended him back in school, back when you were both kinda gangly and awkward and you noticed him reading a book you liked, but unlike the rest of the puberty-mad morons, he never seemed interested in anyone, despite the ample flirting and teasing from classmates and strangers once he started to fill out his tall frame and look less like a boy and more like a man.
God, even these days when you talked him into going out to a bar or club, he never once checked out your cleavage or told you that you looked pretty, no matter how hard you tried to bait him into it.
Maybe you just weren’t his type.
So you convinced yourself that he would’ve made a move by now if he felt the same and distracted yourself by dating other losers that were nothing like him.
But those relationships always ended for the same reason they started.
They weren’t him.
Didn’t make you laugh the way he did or remember your birthday or pick up the phone when you had a nightmare at three in the morning. Didn’t spoil you with just because gifts or send you a picture of a cute stray cat that reminded him of you. Called you weird for being into certain video games or shows instead of asking to play or watch it with you.
And apparently, they weren’t nearly as large as him either.
“I, um, I’m just gonna go,” you called out to him, thighs pressing together as you sucked in a deep breath, already planning on returning to your bed for your own alone time. “I should’ve called or texted or something before coming over.”
Sure, he’d given you the key to his place and told you to come over anytime, but in all the years you’d been abusing that privilege, you’d never walked in on that. Usually, he was just playing video games after work or asleep with a manga volume on his chest, drooling onto his pillow.
“N-no, wait,” he called out, and you wondered if he had actually managed to finish, or if you just edged him.
You had started to walk down the hall, but you heard the door creak open and his socks sliding against the wooden floor as you looked back over your shoulder at him.
Sweaty strands of hair falling forward in his face, his glasses slipping down his sharp nose as he looked at you with wide, wild eyes. But your own had drifted down to the incredibly clear outline of his bulge in his gray sweatpants, a small damp spot growing through the fabric as you swallowed the spit pooling in your mouth.
FULL FIC ON PATREON HERE (also features a wide assortment of other oneshots/series!)
Sweet! Boyfriend who’s never been in a relationship before, not until you asked him out, at least. He has no idea what he’s doing and you can tell, but it’s endearing in its own weird, wacky way.
Sweet! Boyfriend who has no idea how to behave around you. Should he kiss you when he greets you? Should he grab your hand and hold it tight as you walk around together? Is he even allowed to touch you so boldly? He doesn’t know, and he doesn’t want to risk embarrassing you or pushing a boundary, so he simply…doesn’t. He waits for you to make the make the first move time after time, desperate for your attention but too afraid to ask for it.
Sweet! Boyfriend who awkwardly begins asking you on dates once you remind him that he’s allowed to initiate romantic gestures too. He’s so scared of disappointing you with his lack of experience, but he does his best, shooting quick, embarrassed invitations to dinners or movies with a blush on his face. He’s trying his hardest to seem nonchalant and you know it, but you couldn’t possibly miss the way he refuses to meet your eyes as he speaks, or how his face slowly turns red as he waits for a response. With him putting in so much effort to push past his awkwardness, how could you refuse?
Sweet! Boyfriend who tries so hard to seem cool and unbothered in front of you, but for some reason, he can never contain the overwhelming emotions that fluster him whenever you walk by. He wants to be the perfect boyfriend and getting too overwhelmed doesn’t fit his idea of that, but you don’t mind. How could you? His nerves are endearing, a living display of how flustered you make him.
Sweet! Boyfriend who tenses up whenever you touch him, only to melt into your sweet embrace as soon as he realizes what’s happening. He’s not used to physical affection, least of all from a romantic partner, so it takes him a second to process the endearing touches gracing his skin. It feels awkward and scary to him, being physically connected to someone else, but he can’t help but snuggle into your side after a couple moments of deliberation, soaking up all the warmth you give him. Your touch is like a drug to him, he craves it so badly, yet doesn’t know how to instigate on his own. He’ll work up the confidence eventually, but for now, you’ll have to get him used to your touch. He’ll get the hang of it after a while, you can be sure of that.
Sweet! Boyfriend who’s such a nerd. As soon as he gets comfortable enough in the relationship, he’ll gain the confidence to talk about anything and everything that interests him, looking at you with a sparkle in his eye that you rarely ever see. It makes you feel good to know he trusts you enough to share his interests-however odd they may be-and you’ll gladly give him the attention you know he’d award you if you wanted a turn at ranting about your likes. Little by little he’s opening up, and you’ll be damned if you ruin that by seeming uninterested.
Sweet! Boyfriend who’s always trembling whenever he instigates physical affection, but you don’t mind. He’s trying his hardest to show you he wants to be near you, so why complain? Plus, his hoodie’s soft, and his hold is comfortable. Why would you ever want to break away?
Sweet! Boyfriend who likes to tease, but it never has the impact it should because he’s too nervous to hurt you. It gets easier as the two of you banter back and forth, but he makes sure you know his teasing is nothing but lighthearted, and in return, you do the same for him.
Sweet! Boyfriend who physically cannot complement you without blushing and/or averting his eyes, forcing himself to speak the words he so desperately wants to say to you but doesn’t have the courage to do so without getting flustered. It’s yet another habit of his that gets easier with time, but it never fails to make you feel special, with how shy he gets. As if you’ve stunned the words right out of his mouth.
Sweet! Boyfriend who doesn’t know much about relationships, but the one thing he does know is that he wants to make you feel loved and appreciated every second of your relationship. He’ll slip up every once in a while, everyone does, but you’ll never doubt how much he cares for you, not if he can help it.
He loves you, and he’s desperate to earn your affections. So please…bear with him for a little bit. He promises he’ll make it worth your while.
N.G.S.T: Nerds Get Sex Too [Fogell/McLovin x GN Tutor! Reader]
Author’s Note: Set after canon events of Superbad. While from what research I’ve done Fogell is 18 in the movies, I’ve never been a fan of high school settings for stories (because I was a loser for most of my time there). So this is a university setting, left intentionally vague for whatever year in college you want. All that matters is reader is an upper class men. AFAB/Trans reader for now sorry.
Analysis 15: Nerds Get Sex Too
What started as a mediocre tutoring job had rapidly grown out of hand. Of course your two's relationship wasn’t standardly inappropriate. After all, you were both students at the university. But it wasn’t your ideal situation to have your tutee so–intimately involved with you. Furthermore he was shameless about his infatuation with you. Which was not ideal because now you looked like the asshole for blowing him off and trying to keep the situation under wraps. Though you didn’t exactly have a line of suitors waiting for your attention and acknowledgement. Still, when Fogell came knocking on your door, on a day you both knowingly didn’t meet on. For some poor lack of judgement you let him in. Oh and he couldn’t have been more giddy about it. Your conversion with him was short and painfully awkward as per usual. But when he had leant in to rub away the rouge smudge of eyeliner that had found its way to your cheek, you kissed him impulsively. Again. Was it really an ‘in the moment' lack of judgement if this was another tallied incident on the board. It was unclear to yourself if these random acts of pinning were meant to be self sabotage or just caution to the wind. But as the two of you made out, Fogell spoke up.
‘Can we have sex now?’ He muttered against your lips in a whisper yell that lacked all subtlety.
Abruptly you pulled back. Your eyebrows rose with an expression lacking amusement. ‘Geez Fogell you always know how to win someone over with the right words.’ You replied flatly. You rose to your feet wiping the corners of your mouth with a stiff sniffle.
‘What? How else was I supposed to ask?’
‘It’s not about how you asked, it's the abruptness.’
With his mouth slack, cluelessly Fogell nodded. But you could tell his mind was still turning gears to wrap his head around his mistake.
‘I got class in a few minutes anyways. You shouldn’t be in here.’
‘Yeah, but you let me in so,’ The correction in logic coming from that usual nasally tone of his. It made whatever he said with confidence sound smug. Which got under your skin an unreasonable amount. There was a satisfied smile over his face too. It was still hard for him to grasp that there was someone out there aware of how much of a loser he was. Yet fully sober and willing, they made out with him regularly. Like at a mundane time like this. Someone who was willing to be a part of..whatever unlabeled messy fling you wanted to call this.
You grabbed your jacket from the edge of the bed tossing it over your shoulder pacing to the bright sunny window and yanked the curtains closed. Fogell shifted on the edge of the bed sitting up straight, horrible at concealing false hope, squirming with giddy excitement.
‘Oo–you’re closing the blinds..!’
‘Yeah. Try not to jizz your pants. It’s an afternoon in the middle of autumn, by the time I come back from class it’ll be dark out.’
You watched the geek’s shoulders visibly slump.
‘Dude. I don’t know what you expected, you knocked on my door in the middle of the day. Middle of me studying by the way.’
‘I wanted to see you.’ His voice an exaggerated groan as he watched you ping-pong around your dorm picking up things and pushing them into your cram packed bag.
‘So?’
‘So what?’
‘You’re really off to class?’ While his insistence to be acknowledged wasn’t purposefully meant to be annoying, Fogell had this super special talent of still managing to be just that without having to try.
‘You want me to seriously consider your question?’ Shameless and unsurprisingly he nodded.
You clicked your tongue in annoyance. ‘And if I turn you down and say no?’
‘Then I’ll just be some jerk-wad with his limp dick in his hands. I can live with that.’
You stood there weighing your options and the worst hypotheticals you could imagine. He could immediately go and blab to Evan and Seth. He could ghost you right after you’re finished, no pun intended. He could be so horrendously bad in bed it ends up a core memory of cringe for the rest of your life. The list could go on.
‘Uh, I’ll be gentle..?’He insisted with a notable uncertainty to his tone. The phrase clearly foreign to his lips. Yet, you snorted out a laugh. A chuckle, half surprised and half shock.
‘Yeah man–I don’t doubt that.’
‘Come on I’m trying to be comforting! I like you asshole, you know that.’
You did. What else would make him stay around as long as he had. Going along with the nit-picky nature of your half in commitment.
‘You don’t think it’ll make things awkward after?’
‘Not any more than it is now.’ He had leant in playing with your hair, feeling it between his fingers as he waited. Expecting to be turned down and look like a foolish turbo virginal loser…
‘Good point.’
• • •
Fogell’s kisses became messy and uncoordinated as he tugged your shirt over your head. He balled it up, tossing it on the floor next to your bag as he leaned in close.
‘Ow. Fogell, are you kissing or are you trying to maul my neck?’
‘I’m giving you a hickey.’ he muttered against your skin. An aggressive one at that. His hand was hesitant to come in contact with your bare skin. It was warm to the touch and he could feel texture to the pattern of stretch marks across your skin. He laid you on the mattress lying parallel. Though exceedingly close enough to the edge of the bed. He second guessed the idea of getting any closer to the warmth of your body.
His thumb ran slowly over the faded scars across your chest. “Woah..are these from when you removed your..y’know.’
Damnit if the guy hadn’t asked with such genuine awe and curiosity you would have replied with the snarkiness, and most obvious lie you could think of. But you could see how his eyes were glued, his tracing thumb rose goosebumps to your arms and had your mind lagging.
‘Uh..yeah.’
‘Sick.’An amused sound left his lips as you watched his smile grow unapologetically.
You could see his struggle to not tilt his weight back and fall off the bed.
‘I’m not gonna bite your head off if you get closer.’
‘I dunno if I fully believe that.’
The eye roll from your was just automatic by now when he was unserious at times like these. You lifted your leg, hooking it loosely around his hip and pulled. Encouraging him to get closer. You were certain you could pinpoint the exact moment his throat went dry when your bodies were close. The heat of your body feathered against his own skin. More notably both your hips aligned. Of course you could feel something poking at your upper thigh. And you knew what it was..but you were too coy to speak up about it.
His hand moved from your chest, palm gracing over your stomach to the button of your pants where he thumbed and fidgetted with a beltloop.
‘Can I take these off?’
Your breath was stuck in your throat, despite the unreadability of your focused expression and slightly furrowed brows. You nodded yes.
‘Sweet..’ flurried eagerness clear through his mumble. He knew it was kind of weird to be the only fully clothed one right now, so he took off his own shirt and discarded it while he fidgetted clumsily to get your pants down. His hand pushed into your underwear, cold for a couple seconds and shock to your body before melting to the warmth of your inner thighs. His thumb grazed over the slit of your folds gathering sapping slick on the pad of his thumb.
“H–holy shit you’re actually wet..”
If it weren't for the squeak of his tone, his slack jaw in infatuation and the intimidated tremble of his voice you would have thought he had stolen such a quip directly from pornos collecting dust deep in a corner of the internet. Fogell was pressing the slick between his thumb and forefinger. Slightly cloudy and viscid sticking to his fingers he watched it string thin and break over and over.
‘Fogell..Fogell!’
‘Huh? O-oh–my bad.”
You stared impassively with rose brows waiting for the loser to float back down from sex-shocked space station orbiting the earth.
‘You scared?’ you asked in a mutter, but there was a gentleness to your voice that showed genuine sincerity.
‘No..n-not really. I mean–I’ve like done this ‘ish before. –Fo’ sure.’
‘So you’ve told me. But I’m not exactly some groupie who thinks you’re an older mature guy.’
His laugh was a wheezy giggle, pushing up his slipping glasses. He shimmied his way on top. Fogell fumbled with the condom he had fished from his wallet. His hand held your thigh open, thumb rubbing slowly and absent-mindedly over your skin and barely grazing your folds. It was noticeable how you squirmed in anticipation.
Finally he pushed in slow and tender with his mouth parted in awe. ‘It's in..h-holy shiz…’ he barely hiccupted out. He had to dig his knees into the mattress swallowing the pulsing lump in his throat. He hoped to anchor himself down less he fuck up and topple on top of your body. Once he found his footing he reached up to remove his glasses, you immediately intercepted swatting his hand away.
‘Wait. I want them on. I want you to see me.’
‘Alright.’ he agreed after a moment of stunned silence.
His head rested in the crook of your neck, slowly he thrusted. Deep and slow but surprisingly not as clumsy as expected. There was actually a rhythm to his hips. Soft moans soon left your lips. Soft little sounds tenderly ringing through his ears and running his body hot to the touch. He could feel his palms growing clammy as he gripped the sheets parallel above your shoulders. In his peripheral vision the edges of his glasses visibly hazed with fog that was slowly clouding his lenses.
‘Soft..f-fuck you’re so soft all over. O-oh my god..’
You liked how he babbled. How he was unable to keep his mind and mouth quiet and even more unable to contain his dizzy enthusiasm. How cute. It was embarrassingly comforting to not just listen to the sound of their own heavy breathing and rapid racing hearts.
‘Does it feel good?’
‘Of course it does–’ thwap.
“A-Ah! S-shit Fogell!?’
‘Sorry, I was tryin’ to mix it up!’ It wasn’t verbalised but hearing that sweet yelp from your lips made him pulse and twitch inside you. Instead he set to be moderately slow and cautious about quickening his thrusts. After all, he knew he wouldn’t be able to last long going that fast. The quicker his pace the harder it was to keep his moans and mewls contained. You ran your fingertips slowly down his spine at the valley between his shoulder blades. His voice cracked in a pathetic whimper that spilled from his lips. Instinctively his back arched, rising his hips.
‘S-Shit–I didn’t mean to sound like a pussy–’
‘No.’ you interjected firmly through their quickened breaths. “That was hot..’
‘...Y-yeah?’
‘Mhm..feel.’
You guided his hand down between your thighs. You could feel his body tense up as the other’s fingers found your clit. He fidgeted and rubbed gently over it. Your body harshly flinched, that was good right? Was it delusional to think he could possibly make you cum first?
As his thrusts became more erratic and sloppy Fogell kept pressure on your clit consistent, rubbing it gently in circles.
‘Fogell–F-Fogell–s-shit!’ You hissed his name out through gritted teeth and soon enough your body jerked wildly under his. Fogell’s hand was soon coated thickly in warm fluid as he slowly pulled it away. After a few more seconds he thrusted deeply and through shivering groans he came. It was actually insanely difficult to hold back one’s own climax. But so worth it.
• • •
By now the two of you had cleaned up. Fogell stepped out of the bathroom with his shirt and briefs back on, currently cleaning his lenses with a tissue. You tied the string of your shorts, shrugging your hoodie on to cover yourself. You turned your head to the digital alarm clock in the corner as Fogell took a seat close beside you.
‘Hm, maybe I could try and catch the last bit of class before it ends.’
There was no response this time. Only Fogell continuing to stare you down as he pushed his glasses up.
‘I’m fucking with you. I don’t have the energy to go even if I wanted to.’
He left out a dry huff of a laugh and looked down to his hands absently nodding in agreement. You lent back against a pillow and gently rubbed his arm, coaxing him to join you.
‘That was nice..’You finally admitted laying your head against his shoulder, the reassurance being enough to dim the flame of his entranced deep thought.
‘Yeah?’
‘Mhm.’
‘So you think I’m a sex god or no?’
You snorted a genuine whole hearted laugh shaking your head to deny such absurdity.
‘I dunno about that..but I’ll let you stay the night? Does that count for extra points?’
- genuinely a sweet guy, he’s made some awful mistakes in the past but he tries to make it up by being a good boyfriend.
- especially with you, he’s just a pretty chill guy, you act more like best friends than lovers and you guys are ok with that.
- he loves holding your hands.
- he deals with his popularity pretty well, but he doesn’t like it when you have to, because he knows it can be very overwhelming and difficult to handle.
- shares his chicken nuggets with you ^^ (if you like them)
- love languages are quality time and gift giving (which mostly consist of chicken nuggets. if you don’t like them, it’s usually some dessert but if you don’t like chicken nuggets, that does disappoint him a little.)
- he finds a way to make vegan nuggets for you if you are vegan.
- ok enough about nuggets, he genuinely enjoys your company, even if you two are doing something dumb that will likely get you both killed.
I love loser yanderes (optional, tbh), so much it's actually disgusting. For some reason, my brain associates losers with high intelligence, and that is what makes me insane. Like, do you mean this disgusting loser is smart as hell and uses his intelligence in a way to win you over? Wow, where did my clothes go? We can be losers together. I'll be the dumb one, and you can be the smartest loser. Loser virgin who can't even hold your hand but is smug when he does something book smart. <333
If you like my work, you can support me here or here [Anything is appreciated]
Yandere Loser is obsessed with you even though you're out of his league
Yandere Loser stalks you and takes candid photos of you
Yandere Loser drools over your hairbrush that he stole and puts on your chapstick
Yandere Loser will tie up and torture anyone he thinks is to close to you
Yandere Loser doesn't care if he's crazy as long as he can watch you
Yandere Loser who watches you behind a corner, smiling to himself
Yandere Loser draws pictures of you in all his sketchbooks
Yandere Loser has journals filled with facts about you [From your likes to dislikes, to your mother and father's ethnicity]
Yandere Loser doesn't care about rejection. You'll love him soon enough just you wait
Yandere Loser scares the shit out of you
Yandere Loser who has no friends
Yandere Loser well, he considers you a friend
Yandere Loser who doesn't hear what you say. It goes in one ear and out the next
Yandere Loser has never kissed anyone and his mother is also crazy [But that's a story for another time]
Yandere Loser wants your first kiss to be perfect [And if you're tied to a chair, gagged, in his basement, so be it]
Just looked back at my old Wattpad account... Why did my Losers x Reader stories actually do moderately well??? I couldn't get passed the first paragraph before cringing out of my skin.
