#lvp

[pompoziim]

madison marie parks valletta haunts my dreams

[realitygifs]

out of contex bravo gifs

[multifandomfix]

Imagine the morning after with Lisa Vanderpump.

Sunlight finds you before consciousness does. It seeps through the sheer curtains of Lisa’s bedroom, casting soft gold across the silk sheets tangled around your legs. The first thing you feel is warmth, the kind that lingers in the air after being touched all night. The second is her, beside you, utterly at ease.

Lisa sleeps like someone who knows she’s adored, her hair spilling across the pillow in glossy waves, her lips faintly parted. You lie there a moment, drinking her in, unsure whether to move or just memorize her like this. After all, it is a rare moment when she isn’t fully aware and in control, performing, seemingly untouchable.

Eventually, her lashes flutter. She opens her eyes, slow and languid, and finds you watching. A faint smile curves her mouth. “Good morning, darling,” she murmurs, her voice still tinged with sleep, making it deeper, softer, intimate in a way it never is when she’s conducting business.

“Morning,” you manage, heat climbing your face when she reaches out and traces a finger along your jaw.

“I rather hoped I’d wake up to this,” she says, lazy but sincere. The compliment makes your chest tighten. She shifts closer, the sheets slipping just enough for her bare shoulder to emerge. You catch the faint scent of roses and champagne still clinging to her skin.

When she presses a kiss to your temple, your pulse skips. You can feel yourself melting all over again, the same way you did last night.

Now, in the quiet morning, she seems softer. Still Lisa Vanderpump, still impossibly poised, but soothed and content in your arms. You know this might not last, but for now, she looks at you like you’re the only indulgence she doesn’t regret.

“Coffee or mimosas?” she asks.

You smile. “Whichever keeps you here a little longer.”

Her lips curve. “Then mimosas it is, my darling.”

[petitegoose]

She had to remind me to breathe and hold me up cause I could not. I kept telling her I loved her and she was the best sport…whatever they say about meeting your hero cause they could disappoint…she sure as fuck did not.

[valleeeeejo]

just remember that😇

[wee-toe]

Secret replicants x

[sadieposting]

ok so I haven’t made art in a hot minute but I did suddenly manifest this portrait of LVP so here we go! Acrylic on canvas paper

[thedramaticking]

Season 2 of RHOBH is so weird to me watching it again cause like say what you will about Lisa Vanderpump but she was not really a problem in Season 2? 

Like she openly hates Russell. She seems to be the least questioning of Taylor’s abuse claims. She offers Taylor a place for her and her daughter to live if they needed to leave an unsafe home? She is ride or die for Kyle (and later Taylor). Like always defending them to other people. Giving her the benefit of the doubt. Which Kyle never seems to reciprocate and then calls Lisa Bobby Fisher at the reunion. 

And the whole Tea Party thing with Camille. Lisa is literally talking in the background, backing Camille up? They all talk about it later like Lisa wound her up and hung Camille out to dry to play the hero? But like you can hear Lisa in that scene saying the same things. And her attitude toward Taylor doesn’t change after? Its more that Taylor’s attitude to Lisa has changed? Idk. That doesn’t sit right with me? 

And then Adrienne comes out of nowhere with her super petty problems with Lisa. Like her end credit thing is that she is celebrating have a new neighbour? For why? She lets her staff talk shit about Lisa to other people. She bitches about Pandora’s bachelorette as if Lisa’s friend didn’t offer to throw it. Like Lisa has known the guy for 15 years. Since Pandora was like 10. And she is out here accusing Lisa of selling stories with like no proof? It’s so petty. 

And then they are all on Lisa for her confessionals. But like every one is bitchy in the confessionals? 

Idk. Maybe its the editing? But this season really seemed weird to me. I know in later seasons other things happen. But season 2 Lisa really really didn’t deserve it? 

Also Maloof Hoof is objectively hilarious and the fact Adrienne was so pressed is so funny to me.