#lymie

[neuroborreliosis]

www(.)ineedatherapist(.)com/

written in a bad bout of brain fog - 7/20/23:

i sit here like a screensaver staring out, taking nothing in i sit stupefied by very mundane surroundings while time wastes itself on trivialities my brain booms with echoes of thoughts that evaporate before they hit me my ears are tornadoes where white noise and tinnitus ring around and clang against my consciousness like vehicles and furniture and other things lost to encephalitic winds

saran-wrapped brain suffocates me in my wakeful state just enough to make me go a little bit dim, not enough to call a doctor in i feel like if i don't scream and keep screaming i'll die forgotten like this, cold-war collateral strung along by b. burgdorferi, silent slo-mo fadeout from the sickness that screens me in.

[lgbtlymie]

I don’t think there’s a single aspect of my life that hasn’t been influenced by my illness.

[thevoidandiarefriends]

free books n stuff

so pmdd is hitting me like a truck this month and I don’t have much energy to be a real human person but I wrote & published some books on Amazon last week and if y’all are bored in quarantine and want to check them out it’d mean the world to meee

There’s the first book I published (Midnight Comes) which is free through tomorrow. It’s just shy of 50 pages so it’s a pretty quick read.

you’ll probably like it if you also like:

poetry

frikking gorgeous illustrations (done by @/melissaonmars on instagram)

Rapunzel

Beauty and the Beast

the Snow Queen

Snow White

the Little Mermaid

I also have a 16 page fantasy short story (Losing the Stars) for 99¢ featuring

prophecies

generational trauma

8 year olds with way more on their shoulders than any child should have to carry

loving father figures Trying Their Best

And last but not least I just released the poetry collection (the flowers need love to grow too) I’ve been working on since July 2019 chronicling my journey with

mental health

self love

chronic illness

growing up & childhood 

discovering myself in my first year of college

and if you read between the lines a good chunk of them were love poems to random strangers and my now-partner about realizing I was queer

it’s also got a ton of super cool illustrations by myself and my friends and I’ve poured a lot of love into making sure it’s as good as I can make it.

Here’s links to all of those (disclaimer: all the amazon ones are affiliate links cuz ya girl broke & trying her best):

Midnight Comes: Amazon Kindle | Paperback

Losing the Stars: Amazon Kindle

the flowers need love to grow too: Amazon Kindle (has alt text & image descriptions) | PDF download (has prettier illustration formatting)

and if you enjoy those you can follow my amazon author page for notifications when I publish more <3

I’m currently writing and editing 3 more short stories to release when they’re done, and the paperback edition of tfnltgt will be out as soon as I approve the final proof copy

stay safe and healthy <3

[im-bi-this-is-my-life]

One year ago this month I got out of a back brace and now I’m getting muscle definition back!!!

[juniperandjustice]

Not every disabled or ill person IS ABLE TO use bikes/trikes or public transportation!

The ableism I'm seeing regarding use of plastic straws combined with the shallow excuse of environmentalism is reminding me a lot of what I've personally had to deal with from anti-car activists who think no one should be allowed to use any kind of vehicle- that every disabled or ill person, no matter where they live or what their limitations are, can just use public transportation or an adapted bike/tricycle (nevermind compromised immune systems or intense chronic pain or anything). It's really frustrating & insulting, and they can be really hateful/hurtful/judgmental with what they say about it. Abled & healthy people are so out of touch with reality, at least the realities of those of us who aren't.

[acatalogofchronicillness]

This tattoo has slowly been forming for me over the past several years. It’s about survival, resiliency, being a warrior, and refusing to give up. I’ve had to survive many things in my life, but this disease takes the cake. It’s been the fight of my life, and I wanted a daily reminder to always choose - to choose to live, and to fight. 🎂🌸💉

[lymeprincess]

Why call it ‘Lyme Disease’?

“In the early 1970s a group of children and adults in Lyme, Connecticut, and the surrounding areas were suffering from some puzzling and debilitating health issues. Their symptoms included swollen knees, paralysis, skin rashes, headaches, and severe chronic fatigue.”

“These families were left undiagnosed and untreated for years... If it wasn’t for the persistence of two mothers from this group in Connecticut, Lyme disease might still be little-known even today. These patient advocates began to take notes, conduct their own research, and contact scientists.”

“Finally, by the mid-70s, researchers began describing the signs and symptoms of this new disease. They called it Lyme...”

(Source)

[rwannphotos]