why did mark leave nct and sm?
i wanted to do this as a video because i like being able to get every thought out exactly as i’m feeling it, especially when i’m making predictions, but i genuinely could not get my sentences out right. so i’m taking that as a sign that this was meant to be written instead.
before i even got into the cards, i want to say what i picked up from that video of mark crying.
the energy felt final in a very specific way. not “they’ll never see each other again,” but “this exact version of dream, all seven of them on stage together like this, is ending.” it felt like the last day of high school. like, yeah, you may still know these people after this, you may still love these people after this, but you are never getting this exact classroom, this exact schedule, this exact phase of life back. it felt like mark knew that. it felt like he knew this was the last time for a very long time that all seven of them would be on stage together like that, and that realization was hitting him in real time.
question: what was mark’s energy around him leaving? : the moon
mark was not certain, and i honestly still do not think he is fully certain now. this did not feel like a clean, peaceful decision where somebody knows exactly what they’re doing and feels totally settled in it. this felt like confusion on a much deeper level. what used to make sense to him does not make sense the same way anymore. what used to feel valuable does not feel the same anymore. what used to feel stable or meaningful has shifted.
this looked like an identity crisis more than just a career change. not just “what do i do next,” but “who am i now, what matters to me now, what is still real to me now, and what is this life even supposed to mean to me anymore?” that is why i kept saying this felt bigger than just him leaving a group. it felt like he has been going through a period where his entire internal compass has felt off.
question: what was sm’s energy? : ten of pentacles
sm knows exactly how valuable mark is. he is a powerhouse. he is one of the people who helped keep the lights on over there. he brought them money, success, stability, and a huge part of the legacy attached to nct. i did not see anything here that made me think there was some huge dramatic abnormal fallout. this felt like regular company shit. that’s it.
but what stood out to me is that this did not feel like “we are gonna fight you to the death to keep you.” if that were the case, i think i would have gotten shown something harsher. this felt more like they know exactly how much he did for them and how much he exceeded expectations. the image i got was literally like an assassin who never failed a mission. every time you were sent out, you delivered. every time we needed you, you came through. everything you touched turned successful. you made us money. you made this shit bigger. so when somebody like that finally says they are done, what can you really say? even if they hate losing him, he already did too much for them to deny what he earned.
question: what was nct/the members’ energy as a whole? : three of pentacles reversed
the group energy felt thrown off. not just sad, thrown off. the structure feels disrupted. this looked like people having to sit with the reality that things cannot work the exact same way now. how do we function without him? how do we adjust without him? what does this even look like now?
mark is a pillar every unit he is in, so of course his absence changes the structure. and on top of that, i do think there is an emotional layer here too where some people could have taken it personally in that insecure way, like, damn, were we not enough to make you stay? not because he hates them, but because when somebody that central leaves, the people still standing there are going to feel the gap. i think some question if he felt like he couldn’t grow with their talent. but (that’s not true!!!! it’s beyond that)
question: why did he leave? : ten of swords reversed, two of wands, seven of wands reversed, five of cups reversed, nine of pentacles
mark hit rock bottom mentally. this does not feel like normal stress or just being tired. this feels like somebody got so low that he had to really confront what this lifestyle, or this chapter of his life, had been doing to him. but what is important here is that this did not feel like him actively drowning. this felt like him starting to come out of it. this felt like healing. however in healing, he realized he no lingers wants to be apart of the lifestyle he was living anymore. i feel very strongly that he didn’t realize the environment around him was making him sick, and when he did, he was like … what the fuck happened to me … how did I not see how wrong so many things have been. 10 of swords is often my last straw card. the final nail in the coffin. once he started healing from whatever that was, it was clear to him.
to me, the biggest message in this spread was that he started healing, and through healing he realized this is not who he is anymore.
that is the part that matters. sometimes people think healing means learning how to stay in the same environment and handle it better. a lot of the time healing is what makes you realize you cannot keep living the same way. that is what this felt like.
this had also been on his mind for a long time. this was not random. this was not sudden. he had been thinking about it, planning around it, going back and forth with it, probably longer than people realize. i also think he had been having to defend something for a long time, whether that was his feelings, his perspective, his limits, or some version of himself that other people kept projecting onto him. but he got tired. he threw in the white towel. he did not have the energy to keep pushing through something that was draining him.
and the other big thing here was self-respect. like, i have done more than enough here. i have given enough here. i have proved enough here. i do not have anything left to prove to you in this space. i’m proud of what i did here, but my heart is calling me somewhere else now. that is what the ending of this spread felt like to me.
i also do think there is a chance there was a specific incident that really shook him up, but even if there was not one singular event, the overall lifestyle itself looked like it had been wearing him down for a long time.
question: why is the moon here for mark? : the empress, four of pentacles
it was attached to a bigger desire to find something more fulfilling for himself. the empress is about the birth of something new, or at least the desire to create something. he is trying to protect something very personal right now. his peace, his future, his growth, his self-worth, maybe even his sense of purpose. there is something he wants to nurture and grow, and he is holding it very close to his chest. 4 of pentacles represents the things that matter most to us in this world, so this tells me that by staying, he would have had to give something that is directly attached go his stability as a human being (mentally, physically, emotionally, etc). with the energy of creation here, it could even just be him wanting to make the music that feels more associated with who he is today. not 5 years ago, etc.
question: was there any truth to him and sm having issues? : queen of wands, knight, knight of swords, high priestess reversed, page of swords
i did not read this as one huge dramatic fight. i read this as a pattern.
queen of wands felt like mark to me. somebody passionate, strong-minded, somebody who actually does have real feelings and is not scared to say how he feels. he is not passive in spirit. but the high priestess reversed is what really got me, because that is what happens when somebody stops trusting their own gut and keeps trusting other people to tell them what their gut means.
and because mark joined so young, that makes perfect sense to me. when you come into something like this as a child, you are taught that the adults around you know better than you do. and that does not just magically disappear because you become an adult on paper. especially when the same people are still around you, still guiding you, still praising you, still making you feel like trusting them is the safe thing to do.
so what i saw here was mark bringing his feelings, thoughts, or concerns to them, and then those conversations ending with their version winning over his own intuition. knight of swords and page of swords felt like repeated conversations, sharp communication, back and forth, him saying what he feels, them saying what they think, and the dynamic repeating. so no, i do not think this was some giant abnormal beef. i think this was a very normal but deeply unhealthy company dynamic where part of his healing was realizing he had spent a long time letting them define what was best for him. i see him having some type of moment where he wakes up from being hypnotized and realizes how fucked up a lot of stuff has been. how he thought they actually was saying what was best, but in reality they were just saying what’s best for them and framing it like it was best for him too.
and honestly, i think this is the case for a lot of idols who joined the industry young. once you have been conditioned that way, it does not just switch off overnight.
question: what does he want to do next? : seven of cups, seven of pentacles, wheel of fortune reversed, queen of cups reversed, eight of wands reversed
mark has a lot of things he wants to do next. not one thing. a lot. and the important part is that these are not just daydreams floating around in his head. the seven of pentacles tells me he has already been planting seeds for some of these things for a while. this is beyond “i have an idea.” this is “i already started putting energy into this, and now i’m waiting to see what grows.”
so the vision is there. the seeds are there. the work is there.
the problem is that he feels like he is in a cycle of bad luck right now. he does not trust how what he has been building is going to play out. he feels emotionally unstable about it, and things also look delayed. so this is not him having no direction. this is him having multiple things he wants and already starting to build some of them, but being scared about how life as it looks right now is going to affect the results.
basically, the fear is not “i don’t know what i want.” the fear is “i do know what i want, but i don’t know if what i have planted is going to grow the way i need it to.”
question: can i learn more about this bad luck / blockage? : king of pentacles reversed, hermit reversed, two of cups, three of wands reversed, lovers reversed
this is where it stopped feeling like random bad luck and started feeling like interference.
the two of cups is what makes this spread interesting, because it says there is a real connection here. a real bond, a real alignment, a real shared vision somewhere in this. so this did not feel fake to me. something here was genuine.
but around that, i got king of pentacles reversed, which immediately made me side-eye somebody with power, money, control, influence, or a very possessive need to have the final say. the hermit reversed added the feeling of mark being uncomfortable, isolated, overthinking, or being stuck in his own head. then the three of wands reversed showed me the actual blockage: something is not being allowed to move forward or expand the way it should. and the lovers reversed is where the root issue came through for me. misalignment. people not being on the same page. different values, different priorities, different direction.
so i did not take this as “nothing is there.” i took this as there absolutely is something there, but it is not growing cleanly because the people, power, or priorities around it are not lined up.
question: was there any truth to him and his brother wanting to start a company together? : chariot reversed, nine of cups, star reversed, four of cups, five of pentacles
i do think there may be truth to that, but not in the sense of some fully formed plan that was definitely about to happen. this felt more like a real idea, a real conversation, something they wanted in theory because it would have made them happy.
the desire is there. the emotional fulfillment is there. but the movement is not. it does not look like it was getting off the ground. the hope drops, the interest fades, and there is a lack of support behind it. so to me, this looked like something that may have actually been discussed, something mark and his brother could have wanted, but once reality set in, it started feeling like, okay, but how would we actually do that? and that is where the energy falls apart.
so yes, i do think there may be truth there. i just do not think that was the main reason mark left.
