#mason kellum

[chacealvarez]

“You ever think about how drinks got their names?” he asked, measuring the different liquids into the martini shaker. "Like, how drunk was the dude who came up with the fuzzy navel?” / @mason-kellum

[matthew-lombardi-blog]

Dear mason

@mason-kellum

Mason,

I’m notsure when exactly we stopped getting along. You’re a guy who sleeps around, andbelieve me, I never had any problem with that. At least not until you decidedthat your next target would be my best friend. I had my doubts about you, butbecause Dani essentially begged me to, I gave you a chance. But you fucked thatup really quickly. Even I didn’t think you had it in you to fuck another womanwhile on a date with someone else. And while Dani seems to have forgiven youfor your mistake, that shit you pulled only confirmed what I already knew aboutyou.

Dani toldme that you said “I love you” to her. This is the part where I call bullshit. Idon’t think you love her. I think you’re just infatuated with her because she’sone of the few women who’s said no to you. She hasn’t jumped into bed with youyet, and that bruises your inflated ego. You want an exciting challenge. I getit.

Buthonestly, Mason, I don’t think you even know her.

You mightknow that she loves burgers. That girl can grub hard. That’s no secret. But doyou know that the instant she tastes a hint of mustard, that burger is dead toher? And do you know that if you give her a donut, she’ll pick at the top,eating all the sprinkles and icing first before she eats any of the cake? Orhow about her love for the color pink? Yeah, bet you didn’t expect that one.But if you ever ask her what her favorite color is, she’ll deny it. She doesn’twant to be associated with “girly” things. And speaking of girly, her middlename. God, she’d murder if you ever called her Danielle Marie. That’s what hermom calls her, and she absolutely hates it.

Tell me,Mason. Have you ever seen her when she’s sick? Like really sick? Have you ever had to take care of her when she’s hadthe stomach flu, hold her hair back as she puked into the toilet? Probably not.

You don’tknow her. Not like I do.

You weren’tthere at the bar when she introduced herself as Dani Walker, “just a girl fromNorth Carolina,” a slight Southern twang detectable in her voice.

You weren’tthere at the church watching her walk down the aisle, looking so incrediblybeautiful in white, taking Luke Bradford as her lawfully wedded husband.

You weren’tthere the night she lost said husband. You didn’t stay up with her, sleep bedamned, holding her as she cried and cried and cried some more.

My love forDani is over a decade in the making. Yours is just an 8-month-old boner thatwill eventually go away when it finds something new and exciting that catchesits attention. And when you eventually fuck up—again—I’ll be here patientlywaiting, like I always have.

Sincerely,

The MostImportant Man in Dani’s Life

[chlo-miller]

💞

[chlo-miller]

🎶

Fast - Jason Aldean

Hey, what's past is pastOh, nothin' in this world lastsHey, aren't those four lanes fast?

[chlo-miller]

♫

Barefoot Blue Jean Night - Jake Owen

A full moon shinin' brightEdge of the water; we were feelin' alrightBack down a country roadThe girls are always hot, and the beer is ice cold

[matthew-lombardi-blog]

All -mason

Send ✉ for an 2 AM text

[TEXT]: If you’re closing tonight, can you hold off on locking up for a sec? Dani stole my favorite shirt when she rushed out of my apartment this morning.

Send ✘ for an unsent text

[TEXT]: It’s probably not fair to hate you because you make her happy in a way that I can’t, right?

Send ☠ for a threatening message

[TEXT]: If you break Dani’s heart, I swear to God—you’re going to have to get used to living without your favorite appendage. 

Send ❤ for a lusty/loving/affectionate message

[TEXT]: I’m saying this because I care about your well-being… Could you get tested for STDs? 

Send ♣ for a drunk message

[TEXT]: yuou fkcing knew i likred her adn yuo fckng went aftrer her anyuway

[TEXT]: FUCK YOU

[grace-marcone]

All -ty

Send ✉ for an 2 AM text

[text] Did you just get done with a show? How did it go?

Send ✘ for an unsent text

[text] Yes I did say that age is just a number but that number is very big between us, we both know that right?

Send ☠ for a threatening message

[text]  I swear Ty, you better not be renting a car or I’ll feel really bad. 

Send ❤ for a lusty/loving/affectionate message

[text] You’re a sweet kid Ty,  don’t let anyone change that please

Send ♣ for a drunk message

[text] Ar u even old enough to gt drink?

[matthew-lombardi-blog]

♥

I love...

1) The first letter of your first name

2) The BBQ from the state where you come from

3) Your boss

4) Your confidence. When you want someone, you just go for them. You make them yours, even when they don’t think they want to be. You took a shot with Dani, and look, it’s gotten you further than me. I guess, kudos for that.

5) Your willingness to change for her. It shows that you might actually care about her. Maybe you are maturing after all.

6) Your beard. It looks really nice and fluffy. Just saying.