Blake: Never ask a Faunus Supremacist what species her boyfriend is.
Yang: what?
Blake: *Pointing at Eve*
Eve: *Sitting in Jaune's lap, crooning under his headpats*
Yang: ... Do you think if we threw Jaune at more evil chicks with the intent of him loving them, we'd have less enemies?
Blake: Uh, no ... I think Eve has staked her claim and wouldn't be happy to compete for his affection, but Ren and Nora brought Emerald into the fold and their relationship. Who knows what else we could do if we paired people up.
Yang: Rehabilitate them?
Blake: Yes.
Yang: ...
~~~~~
Mercury: *Hooking an arm around Oscar* Good news! You're learning how to hot wire a car!
Oscar: Why would I need to do that?
Person: *Distantly* Hey! HEY! WHERE'S MY WATCH?!?
Mercury: *Shoving Oscar into a car* That's why!
Oscar: YOU STOLE A WATCH?!?
Mercury: He's in the One percent of Atlas.
Oscar: Okay, how do I get to the Wires?
~~~~~
Roman: *Studying paperwork* Hmm ...
Whitley: ... Send the guards to the warehouse only after the shipment comes in and sits for two days - a week if there are Harbor Inspectors on the case.
Roman: Why would I do that?
Whitley: If even one of your men are missing their necessary paperwork the whole thing is bust. After a Week only the best of the best will keep their nose to the grindstone.
Roman: Yeah, I know that-
Whitley: Pose as a superior or someone taking the shift, then allow your cargo to be moved out. They won't bat an eye.
Whitley: Although, you could also grease their palms - a week's worth of Heat- er, we're in Vale, Food Stamps as provided through an Employer's Bonuses for excellent work will get anyone too starry eyed to worry about a small mistake - after all, all of this moving of material is technically Legal, it's simply the speed at which it's getting processed that's the hold up - if someone makes that mistake and ignores First-in, First-Out rules, you'll be fine. It'll be on their heads, not your, reputable business man and rehabilitated Villain that you are.
Roman: How did I not think of that! You're a genius kid!
Whitley: You've been against the law for so long you miss the Snowdrifts for the Flakes - Operating just within Legality is the best way to commit a crime - because technically you won't be. That's why the SDC Flourished in profits for so long - seemingly. My father was actually a very bad businessman and we lost SO MUCH Having to constantly fire and hire new people, as well as bribe Judges and- It's just nasty and unprofitable to operate outside of the law to be above it.
Whitley: Toeing the line between Criminal and Corporate is a very tight dance that requires extreme understanding of the steps, and I'm here to guide you back within range of being persecuted.
~~~~~
Gillian: ... I never actually wanted to be evil. I just wanted my brother to live, and I was afraid he would die if I went against him. Not that what I did was necessarily better.
Glynda: Please just continue helping me grade these assignments Miss Asturias.
~~~~~
Neo: *Standing behind a desk at the DMV, reveling in the pain of others*
