Aug 5, 2021
He did use to be a doctor, y'know
seen from Israel
seen from Canada
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from Chile
seen from United States
seen from Thailand
seen from China
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from South Africa
seen from United States
He did use to be a doctor, y'know
BIRTHDAY HEADCANNONS 3 OF 4
Characters: phobos,tricky,dr. Hofnarr, jebus, and dr. Christoff
Notes:i legit didnt have time to finish this part and part 4 before my birthday ended but its not stopping me!!!!
Also jebus/dr. Christoffs parts are platonic. Im sorry.
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Phobos
He most likely found out from some employees talking to each other
"Birthday? Why would a mortal even care of that? Its like any other day" proceeds to immediately care about it and plan
And let me tell you this god complex papyrus will treat you like royalty!
Makes you take the day off and wont let you lift a finger
You ask for something he will order someone to give it to you
Unless its affection from him then he would drop everything without other people knowing, he still has a reputation to keep
You will get the richest chocolate cake
"Happy birthday love of my life" he mumbles. "What was that last part?" "You heard NOTHING" he proceeds to get flustered under the wrappings, you definitely heard it 😊
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Dr. Hofnarr
I imagine he always knew by how you act during the start of the month. (Or end of the previous month if you was born on the 1st)
Just to make sure on what specific day he does ask as casually as he could
Once he gets the proper date he does try and plan
But it does distract him from his work and gets in trouble over it by jeb
Once the day comes he immediately surprises you with a cake! With those joke candles that relights themselves every time you blow them out
He also gave you a cute music box as a gift
It plays your favorite song 😊
He also does your work for you despite your protests, he does not want you to work on your special day
He may pull a all nighter and fall asleep on his desk because of this
You probably should make him some coffee the next morning
Bonus:
Tricky
Yknow those super over the top sweet 16 birthday parties in tv shows? Thats basically what he does for you
Except its apocalypse style
Dis mf would legit toss confetti around singing happy birthday to you
He cant get you a cake....but he somehow gots COOKIEZ
if you knew him when he was dr. Hofnarr he would most likely try and dance with you as the old music box plays
Don't expect it to be graceful he probably will step on your feet by accident from his twitching and fast pacing
"Clown sorry!"
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Dr. Christoff
It depends on how long you knew him
Like if you knew each other since you was kids then he always knew your birthday
If you met at work and knew eachother for maybe several years then he got curious and ask because you never celebrated your birthday
He does make some sort of effort like a casual happy birthday
He frankly didnt have time to get you a present but certainly gave you a slice of cake or some other desert
He does not take all your work away like hofnarr but will help you with it so it will be done faster
May or may not pull a big friendship speech out of nowhere
Bonus:
Jebus
Dis man legit gave you a halo wrist band as a gift
So you can defend yourself and not die
Cuz my god you went through several life threatening situations per week
On purpose
"Can you please stop running head 1st into bandit camps now?" Jeb asked annoyed "not a chance" was your answer.
It’s true I was there
heyyy body hcs?? ig?? idk
Jesus: You have to apologize to Tricky Hank: Fine. Hank: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
Jesus: Hank, my old arch enemy. Tricky: ... I thought I was your arch enemy? Jesus: I have a life outside of you, Tricky.
*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker* Hank: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Everyone: Sanford: ...I did. I broke it. Hank: No. No you didn't. Deimos? Deimos: Don't look at me. Look at 2BDamned. 2BDamned: What?! I didn't break it. Deimos: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken? 2BDamned: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken. Deimos: Suspicious. 2BDamned: No, it's not! Auditor: If it matters, probably not, but Jesus was the last one to use it. Jesus: Liar! I don't even drink that crap! Auditor: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier? Jesus: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Auditor! Sanford: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Hank. Hank: No! Who broke it!? Everyone: Auditor: Hank... Deimos's been awfully quiet. Deimos: rEALLY?! *Everyone starts arguing* Hank, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. Hank: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Hank: Hank: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
Sheriff: Yo is Tricky sleeping or dead? Auditor: Hopefully dead, I hated his guts. Jesus: Yeah, so did I. Tricky: Okay first of all, fuck you-
