#mind rambling

[neptune-orion]

Lowkey Miss my Pandemic Hair I was cute af in my early 20s 💔 now Im on my mid 20s and I lost my spark 💀😂🥀

With my spark I also lost my attitude 🥀💔

And my tiny bits of confidence i had left too...

[fanficmanic]

Speculations and Ramblings

while I wait for 8x10 to download and I can watch the scenes I missed (serves me right for trying to watch while at work)

So lots of people are speculating by Lou's post on IG today that he'll be back on 911.

Not to mention the filming information that's been circulating about a scene involving a helicopter.

Now, hear me out. I've said it more than once, I'm a multi-shipper. I loved the relationship Buck had with Tommy, but I really honestly think that it was needed for Buck to realize his bisexuality, which hopefully will eventually lead to Buddie.

BUT!

You know those fanfiction stories where Buck runs into an ex (almost always Taylor), and he tells her that he's bi and she says something along the lines of: yay so now you and Eddie are together? and then Buck bluescreens and what not?

Yeah? You know them?

Imagine if Tim takes another FF idea (see above), but instead of Taylor, he makes it Tommy! Like, Tommy is genuinely shocked that Buck hasn't gone after Eddie (he wouldn't be surprised that Eddie went after his son), and then he's be facepalming over the fact that he broke up with Buck because he was clearly in love with Eddie, only the two idiots are just too stupid to see what is right in front of them.

[fanficmanic]

I feel like I want to write angst today.

Lots and lots of angst.

The "cry as I write" type of angst.

I haven't written something like that in years, but somehow I feel like I want to do that today.

[neptune-orion]

The things I find out about myself while playing lads lmao

Love listening to Love and deepspace audios

Where I get called "good girl" never thought I had a thing for praising until that game entered my life

especially that one Zayne audio where he goes "now, wont you be a good girl"

IM SAT. 🧎‍♂️

Gets me all needy for attention and affection

Few years ago I woulda been like 😪😒 "can you not???" And now I want head pats and be praised and called princess... like... what in the daddy issues???😂

[brutallybrutus]

Brutally Brutus..

It's kind of crazy how online connections work.. We decide how even though we are traumatized, and broken, and we tell ourselves we will never fully trust, Here We Are. We decide to put ourselves out there, to let someone in.. We find complete strangers, Other humans, or they by chance find us, and they speak to us and some part of our soul and say: 'Hey, I want to know you, I'm not afraid of your dark, your scary, the stuff you keep deep inside yourself and don't tell the world, the things that keep you up at night with tears in your eyes.. yeah, I want to know it all..' .. And just like that, Eventually we believe them, because we are creatures searching for connection.. searching to be understood... Even if we have been programmed to feel over and over again to feel as if we don't deserve it, or that we are too burdensome,unworthy for one reason or another. We choose to believe that this human wants to finally show us what is it like to have someone understand us, We make that connection... We cut ourselves open, Like a cadaver on a table.. Exposing every vulnerable part of ourselves.. Our darkest thoughts, Our traumas, Our Fears... and Our secrets we don't want anyone else to know, But there we are, exposed, vulnerable, to this connection we now .... TRUST... and why? For How Long? Ultimately, only until the need wears off... The need for connection, from you, from them.. No matter how much you put into them, You never know how long they are going to last, and you never know if the trust and love you built on your end is evenly matched, So where does that leave you? ... Right back at where this started. Broken, Losing Faith, No trust... Searching for connection.. this endless loop that seems to go on forever. So here I am. Instead of leaning on connections I never seem to be able to find, or keep. I am here.... Exposing my soul to a blog. Putting my thoughts, emotions, Goals, and everyday ramblings to a keyboard... to remind Myself where I am now, and where I am heading... To show myself in a year, two years, three years.. LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE DONE. And you did it alone. You did it for you. Anyone that may stumble across this, It's nice to meet you, I cannot promise what you might see.. or what kind of shitshow this page might be. It's literally going to be a dump of all my likes, dislikes and just whatever I want... Just my little slice of the internet. All me, all the time, in the raw.... Brutally Brutus ♥

[luvrgrrrrl]

[sentinaldicegremlin]

I want a show, or comic, or something like that, where it is a satirical mockumentry style comedy based upon the police force, except our main guy is just a medieval knight wearing full-plate armour, in the modern day. He still rides a horse, which somehow keeps up with cars, and he is just so Shakespearian with his lines and the whole time, his partner is a normal police officer, trying to be a normal police officer