#monstrous asks

[crycifer]

So I heard you want random questions about your writing…. what’s scratching the brain itch for you right now? 👀

....you little brat. a question in reference to this post

i just finished my long walk, so of course i was writing scenes in my head for my most recent brain rot, which is my mingtian fic.

the scene i have in mind may or may not make it to the fic - but vague idea is that Ning Yingying, Liu Mingyan, Luo Binghe, and Ming Fan are all hanging out, NYY's forced "bonding time"

MF is drawing while the girls are talking yellow books, and LBH is just vibing.

NYY makes a comment, "they're men, so they can only do it once and then they're done for the night."

which... um. MF has had a very different experience with TLJ. so he makes the mistake of snorting.

he instantly catches the attention of all three of the others and he realizes in dawning horror that somehow he is the one with the most experience in this subject

it eventually turns to him giving LBH sex advice (after, of course, kicking the girls out because he has FAR too thin of a face to even think of telling them ANYTHING.)

((he is LBH's shixiong, and if LBH isn't being safe... then isn't it his DUTY!? to make sure he IS!?!))

anyways, next day MF meets with his shizun and realizes that his shizun seems extremely mellow that day and also a little tired, while LBH has a big spring in his step.

MF gets green faced and says, "sorry... Shizun... this one suddenly remembered he forgot to feed his fish" (he doesn't own any fish) and promptly leaves and avoids both LBH and SQQ for roughly a week.

[themonstercals]

1, 3 and 29 for the ao3 ask :D

<3 <3 thank you so much!!

How many words have you written this year?

This is going to be a lot skewed because I wrote a novel as well... At the very least, I think it's probably somewhere around 240k? Give or take?

At least 100k just on AO3!

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

Specifically AO3 - it's kind of a huge toss up. Am I proud of the fic that has currently 95k and on going? Am I most proud of my most recent one because it shows most of my growth as writer?

Or am I proud of the one that is in a niche fandom but has some pretty great worldbuilding that I had a lot of fun with?

I think I'll go with "The Thread of Fate Says We Will Meet Again" that I am working on with @kingdomofbrokenhearts. We have such big plans for the fic that we've worked on together, and I think I am really proud of what we've come up with so far!

The base idea is all hers, but I like to think I've helped out a little!

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

Ahhhh... this is always so difficult. Hmmmm...

The papers sat, mocking him. His eyes felt dry. He blinked several times, hand poised and brush prepared. Words jumbled before him. What was some sort of report now read as well some of his junior disciple’s essays. He grit his teeth and forced himself to sit up, gripping the paper tight in hand, as he lifted it up to read it. Those were certainly words. 

I enjoy when I can make others laugh with my work, and this was one that seemed to tickle quite a few people.

thank you so much for the questions!

[auggieparkhurst]

☼ - DAYSTAR - a secret they don’t want coming to light

Augustine bristled, eyes round and wide beneath his glasses. A question directed at him; it was something he’d not been expecting. He forced the melancholy from his smile. Allowed it to grow until it was more teeth than eyes as he chittered a laugh. All the while, he kept massaging his left wrist. The rain often made his hand feel dead. “I-it wouldn’t be much of a secret i-if I told you, now would it?”

Another breath of laughter and then the young alchemist fell quiet. He crossed his arms over his stomach as he stepped out of Max’s shadow and stood before the fireplace. His back was turned to the guest, features limned in hearth’s glow, when he spoke again.

“There is a fundamental law that governs alchemy. Perhaps you’ve heard of it? It is a rather simple concept. To obtain, you must give in equal measure. As above, so below.”

Augustine lifted his left hand. Fingers splayed, he tugged the black glove off. The skin was vermillion and glossy. These fresh scars coiled around each digit and trailed along his forearm. A momentary flash of pain written in his brow told of how recently he’d been burned. He cast his thread-bare smile over his shoulders, “You see, you cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. This, I learned during our business in Boralus” - there was that phrase again.

The black glove found its way back onto his hand, concealing his ugly, little truth.

“ I am reminded of the price I paid for my sister’s life. And if given the choice, I’d take another life in exchange for hers…”

Thanks for the ask @damien-ward & @asharinhun!

[comfy-whumpee]

Get ready for like... three of these. ☼ - DAYSTAR - a secret they don’t want coming to light - for Jax?

THANK you for the three of these.

Jax has secrets at different points in his life.

When he’s first captured, the secret is his ADHD. He finds himself with a high tolerance for the drugs the Teacher uses, and it helps him hold his own for longer than he was meant to.

With Savvie the first time, it’s himself. Under the surface of 392 that takes over, Jax is watching and waiting for moments alone and chances to escape and ways to manipulate Savvie into helping him.

After she goes to jail, the secret is his research. Dead of night, anxiety-driven research binges about lock-picking and navigating and the area she lives in, handcuffs and shock collars and household sources of poison.

And then when he goes back... He allows himself one secret, just one, and it’s the shard of glass buried in the plant pot in the sunroom, and the deepening line down the back of his collar under his hair.

[aesterea-archived]

What gave you the idea for monsterous?

the idea for monstrous came to me one afternoon about a year ago when i was laughing at myself for my weakness for fictional villains. i think i was texting a friend? anyway i said i think i’m cursed to fall in love with villains and just… suddenly i had to write that down and then this happened 

[crycifer]

Consider: It ending with Bingzu and SJ bonding over their inabilities to be happy and the closest they'll ever get is watching some other versions attain the happy ending they crave through circumstances that could not occur if they were in their alternate's places. And then they kiss about it.

ahh this is in reference to this post by @confuzing

(linking my post in case you're curious about my tags)

this is actually a really good point. i feel like the reason bingzu keeps sj behind to watch is at first semi sadistic, i.e. "see how much better you could have been." but at this point - bingzu also knows everything sj went through.

the two watch the story unfold, and sj sneers at the man who replaced him, but there's sort of this... quiet acceptance about sj. he never asks bingzu to put him back. the only thing he ever asks is to reincarnate and move on.

bingzu can't help but get curious, because he needs to know, and asks sj, "Why do you hate him?"

sj doesn't answer -- not because the answer is too personal, but because he really doesn't know. for some reason it's easier being around an entity that is just... this vague thing and not a person. so he also feels like he doesn't need to come up with an excuse.

time moves on. they watch the immortal conference and sj sneers about the beast but his heart isn't in it. he watches sy mourn and he finds himself thinking about yqy who never came back.

there's a lot of downtime. it's not like sy's life is all that lively, especially during the widow era, so bingzu and sj share a lot of reluctant company. most of it is bingzu asking sj a lot of questions that sometimes he does or does not answer.

sometimes they switch to different points of view and get to see the disasters happening around the world.

more often than not, bingzu forces sj to watch all the pain and horror that lbh goes through.

sj's guard slowly lowers, and as he sees the boy suffer he begins to really wonder why he treated him as such.

but you're right - they bond over the fact that no one could have really loved or cared for them as they were, both broken and locked in cycles of abuse.

i think at one point sj asks, "if you cared so much about the beast why would you force that interloper to shove him into the abyss?" and bingzu answers, "that couldn't have changed. that shaped him to be who he was." then bingzu looks at him. "what was yours?"

sj doesn't answer. it could have been many things. being left at the qiu estate. being recruited by wu yanzi. fighting to his position as he did in the peak.

then there's the moment where yqy confesses to sy the truth - and sj realizes what he had misunderstood for most of his life. he breaks down - because his qi-ge lost him and will never know.

bingzu is a strange comforting presence during that time.

at some point bingzu reveals himself. at some point, sj has fun poking about the world with him. at another point, they fight and argue, but then also kiss about it

thank you so much for the ask!!! i've been pondering this all day ahahahahahaha

[themonstercals]

25, 27, and 29, for the writing asks? :D

ahh phan <3 thank you!

25. Did you receive any gifts this year?

:O no! Not on AO3. I did receive some other gifts from some other incredible though <3

27. What do you listen to while writing?

Lately it's actually been any of the Zelda games OST. Sometimes some of the older games, other times Breath of the Wild!

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

This one is an incredibly good question... there are a few that I've had a lot of fun with. Here is one of them that my readers really enjoyed!

"There was a knot of gore where his heart should be. It was a violent tangle of betrayal, self-loathing, and confusion."

thank you so much for the questions!

[themonstercals]

12 and 17 for the ao3 ask lmao

...........you're so rude

12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

...........................................................gurl. HOW DARE YOU. um. at least two more series for maintenance, the apothecary mystery, the GPS soulmate au, that bunny oneshot... i think that's it? oops.....

17. Your favorite character to write this year?

I have actually really surprised myself and have really enjoyed writing for my cranky boys. Between LQG and SQQ, though, I will have to say SQQ pulls out on top. There's something so fun about making complex assholes, you know?

thanks for the asks!