#month of devotion

[shyfirewitch-blog]

Loki Month!

5 July: When–if ever–was the first time you felt loved by Loki?

Loki has been in my life since I was super young, so my first memories of him are him being a bit older than me, maybe an older teenager and then growing older as I grew older (Although he was always at least six years older than me, estimating by his looks) and he was always very comforting.

I was very lonely as a child and he would always hug me and make me laugh and tell me everything was going to be alright and that he was there. For the longest time I thought I was just making him up, that I was creating something so I didn’t feel so alone. I’ve always felt love from him but I guess the first time I really felt loved by him was when I was thirteen, falling asleep after crying for hours and he was there holding me, stroking my hair, whispering that it was going to be okay. It was so real and I felt safer than I had in years. 

[shyfirewitch-blog]

Loki Month of July

4 July: When–if ever–was the first time you felt afraid of Loki?

For the most part Loki has been a loving god with me. Very affectionate, very gentle. But that’s because I’m not someone who learns well with “tough love” or having a lot of hard pressure on them. I think as I was growing up he was very careful to be gentle and kind with me because he knew I wouldn’t react in the way he wanted if he was harsher. He is always careful to show me he loves me, even when he is giving me a hard lesson I have to learn.

The only time I have ever maybe felt afraid of him is something I can’t go super into but I angered him and we had a fight and it took a couple days before we made up. It kind of scared me because I’d never made him so angry before. I realized eventually that he was staying mad at me so that I would figure it out, that what I did wasn’t okay even if I thought I did it for the right reasons. And that I have to learn patience, caution, and to realize how much I trust him. But having a god angry at you is not fun. At all. 

[shyfirewitch-blog]

Loki Month!

3 July: “Whenever I see ____, it makes me think of Loki. Other things that remind me of him are…”

Foxes. Snakes. Candy/cupcakes/sweet things. Shadows. Certain types of music. The color red. A whisper in the wind. A snicker. Wolves. There are honestly so many things that remind me of Loki, it would be hard for me to try and name them all. 

[shyfirewitch-blog]

A month for Loki

2 July: “My favorite story of Loki is that time that..”

Okay, so my favorite story of Loki is one that happened at a pagan meeting in a pagan group that most of my friends and I are involved with. We were doing a ritual for the full moon one time and my one friend, Gabby, who is leading the ritual, is saying she’s going to help us all learn auras, since none of us are that great at it besides her. 

So we partner up and I’m trying to gauge Gabby’s aura and she is reading mine. And I’m doing pretty good at seeing her colors for the first time, when all of a sudden she bursts out laughing. Like rolling on the ground laughing. At first I’m really confused and say, “what’s going on?” and everyone is looking at her also confused and she says, still laughing, “I was looking at your aura, which is bright fucking orange by the way, and Loki appeared on top of your head in a meditation Buddha pose, going Ohmmmmm. And then he winked at me.”  And now since my other friend Benji has made their own deck of Cards Against Humanity, one of the cards that can be played in the game is: “Loki meditating on top of Jesse’s head.”

[shyfirewitch-blog]

A month for Loki

Rather behind in this, so I’m going to be playing catch up for the next couple days. 

1 July: “I first discovered Loki when…” 

I’ve been trying to pinpoint when I first discovered Loki but I don’t really know. He has just always been there, ever since I was a child. I also grew up around stories of Vikings and Norse mythology or at least knew about them from since I was young. It was really just a slow awakening to my own spirituality and where my life was going and how Loki was involved. 

It really started when I was around fifteen and had found Norse mythology fascinating, especially as I started reading them as I grew older. But it also felt really intense and real and so I was also nervous about it. It felt completely different from anything else I had learned about. I was realizing that I was very drawn towards Loki, in ways that I couldn’t really understand then. I would read things about how “evil” he was and how he would completely fuck your life up but I just kept thinking that it couldn’t be right. He felt so familiar to me, and I felt completely safe around him, even though I was kind of hesitant for a while. 

So I supposed I slowly learned about Loki, realized who he had been in my life and how long he had been in my life, and then he kind of just popped all the way in going, “Yup, kiddo, let’s party, cause I’m not going anywhere.” 

[shinycapra-blog]

I’m going to be doing the “A Month of Written Devotion” prompt. One of my resolutions this year is to be more religiously involved/practice more regularly but I don’t want to just fall into a prayer/offerings routine. I like the thoughtfulness involved in the prompt and enjoy the journaling aspect of almost anything.

I’m starting the year with a focus on Haides but won’t be posting here day by day. I’m writing it in my paper journal. But at the end of the month I’ll probably make a post about the process and what I’ve gained from it.

[shyfirewitch-blog]

4. Beginning- How and when did your relationship with your topic begin?

To be honest, I’m still not exactly sure. My childhood and teen years were a very difficult time for me, but I have been aware of someone watching over me for a long time and I have since then learned that it was Loki. I do however often get the sense that someone else is hanging around me and may have been for as long as Loki has, but if so, they have chosen not to reveal themselves as of yet. Anyway to continue on about Loki,

I don’t know the exact moment Loki showed up. I only know the time when I started to get feelings someone was watching and it was never scary. It was very comforting actually. I used to cry myself to sleep and dream about a young man/boy with blonde reddish hair and blue eyes smile crookedly at me and wrap his arms around me and let me lean against him. Once I really started to look into the Norse pantheon, Loki just felt right. Something clicked. So like I said in my previous post, I made the first conscious choice to leave him an offering one night and when I felt him come, I recognized him on some level. Everything wasn’t immediately flowers and roses, because life isn’t that easy and it is Loki after all--I’m a firm believer that he really loves a challenge, especially when it comes to a devotee--but things are definitely much better than they were . 

[daugher-of-euterpe-blog]

You are there in my thoughts Present in sleep When I weep When I fought Whilst I write... You are here in my life Present for all When I fall When there is strife Whilst I'm happy You are free to leave Present of freedom When you're in boredom When you lack belief But Whilst you're still here Let us talk

Joanna Simms