They were trainees then, young but not naive. They were well-aware of the challenges life would constantly throw at them once they cross the wide one-way bridge that connects the life of a normal adult to the life of an entertainer. There's no turning back, they knew. Even so, they were determined to take the risk and stepped forward.
The bridge shook. It was not an easy journey for the both of them.
Byulyi was asked to choose between losing weight or giving up on her dreams. Yongsun, on the other hand had to audition for multiple companies.
Eventually, as they continued to cross the unstable path to their desired goal, they met each other. They walked, hand-in-hand, as their other hands gripped on the railings on their opposite sides, making their journey a bit more stable now that they have each other.
They debuted, surprisingly, in the same group along with a cute dimpled girl and a fierce-looking baby.
Mamamoo–that's what they're called.
They were a group destined to lead the younger generations to a more open space. They were a group that screamed for equality, inspiring people from different age groups.
Byulyi and Yongsun, they were closer than ever. They grew to be the support of one another. They silently vowed to protect or at least be there for the other as much as they could, knowing that things are going to be a bit harder than before.
It all started from the warm gazes the two unconciously send to each other. It was noticeable to anyone around them making it a normal occurrence that someone asks them if they were dating, which, of course, they answered no.
They weren't. They were best friends.
(Yongsun watched in adoration as the younger girl twirled around the practice room, playfully dancing along with the maknaes. Her hair flowed at every movement of her body as she moved along the beat, making up the silliest dances but, somehow, still managing to look as graceful as ever.
Her gaze fell on her smile, travelling to her cheek dimples. She admired how her nose scrunches when she laughed too much. She had been there when she cried about it, engulfing her in a warm embrace as the younger's sobs were muffled on her shoulder. She didn't understand how someone would even have the heart to tell her not to smile too much because "it looked ugly". No, it was adorable.
Her thoughts were rudely interrupted when Byulyi called for her.
"Yeba, stop standing in a corner and get your ass over here!"
She feigned a scoff, bringing her hand to her face to hide her reddened cheeks as she made her way towards the group.)
Apart from the weird feelings that seemed to grow as they spent more time in the presence of one another, they knew they were nothing but close friends.
Years later, they've become a bit more aware of their feelings, noticing the smallest things the other is able to make them feel. Byulyi noticed the way her heart seemed to skip a beat whenever her hand brushes with Yongsun's as they walk through the street leading to their company building. Yongsun noticed the way every weird quirks of the younger girl seemed to make her smile.
They noticed the way they longed for each other's presence more than they should whenever they had to spend the day apart.
With their years of friendship, they were comfortable enough to not bother covering up what they felt for each other, fully knowing that their feelings were reciprocated. Byulyi openly showed Yongsun affection, which the older didn't mind. They would also come over to each other's house (which, at the end of the day, always end up with one of them sleeping over) off-days.
It's one of those days wherein the rapper decided to come over to Yongsun's apartment telling the older she was bored as an excuse for her want to, once again, admire her in her casual home attire. It felt a bit more natural… and domestic, she thought.
Funny, though, how Yongsun was the one captivated by the younger girl's seemingly perfect features.
(They were sitting across each other, Byulyi's eyes on the kimchi fried rice Yongsun has made for her just earlier on as she ranted about random stuff the older was barely even paying attention to. She was too distracted by the way the younger's brows seemed to furrow as she talked about her worries about her pet corgi getting a little bit fatter.
"It's unhealthy." She heard her grumble, a small pout beginning to form on her lips.
The more she stared the more she wanted to blurt out the words she's been meaning to say all these time. And she did.
"You and me. Let's date.")
Byulyi remembered secluding herself from her family and friends, locking herself up in her room for weeks. She never went out unless she needed to restock her cup noodles and beer she had been living off to since the day after her nasty break up.
It was until her youngest sister, then 5 years old, grabbed her hand when she was about to enter the dimmed space, pulling her into a tight hug and burying her face into Byulyi's stomach. She sobbed, croaking out the words "Unnie, I miss you. Do you hate me? Why won't you play with me anymore?"
She realized, she needed to pull herself together. She needed to move on.
So when those two words left Yongsun's mouth, she didn't know what to do. She was elated, yet hesitant. In the end, she decided, maybe taking a risk for the second time isn't that bad.
Byulyi and Yongsun have been dating for a year now and the younger woman was more than happy. She never once regretted the decision she had made.
(They were currently sitting on a nearby bench, taking a short break from their so-called "friendly" date as they ate their ice cream in comfortable silence.
Byulyi's fingers gently slipped through Yongsun's, giving her hand a light squeeze as if to say "I love you" which the older responded to by rubbing circles at the back of her palm. Byulyi stared at their joined hands, smiling contently as she went back to eating her ice cream.)
Friends. It was what they have agreed on dubbing themselves in order to avoid the unwanted attention of the public. It was going well until now.
Byulyi was back in her dimmed bedroom, heart pounding hard against her ribcage as she scrolled through all the negative comments aimed at her and her lover.
"Disgusting lesbians! Get the fuck out of our country."
"Bet you a thousand they're doing this for attention."
"This is why I never stanned Mamamoo ughhh ew"
"LMAOOOOO another problematic shit done by the so-called 'queens'"
It was a huge slip-up on her side.
(There is nothing more relaxing for Byulyi than being at her favorite place with her favorite person. Byulyi watched Yongsun's lashes flutter close as the latter took a deep breath, inhaling the fresh scent of nature. It was evening. Yongsun was standing by the railings of the bridge overlooking the Han River, with bright colored lights contributing to the romantic atmosphere. It was picture perfect.
Yongsun opened her eyes, a wide smile painted on her lips as she stared at the beautiful view before her. It made her happy, knowing that she could spend this time with Byulyi between their hectic schedules.
Seeing Yongsun's eyes twinkle in excitement, cheeks flushed red making them look more like a mochi, Byulyi couldn't stop herself. She gently took Yongsun's head into her hand, softly carressing her cheeks and eventually leaning in for a kiss.)
Tears slid down her cheek at the memory. Who would've known a beautiful moment would be the cause of the downfall of both their relationship and career?
She had always wished for their relationship to last longer. She was contented being with her, and was willing to stay through sadness and joy even though not being able to proudly show off their relationship to the public pains her. It could not be helped, being a public figure in a conservative country such as South Korea. Even so, she was willing to hide if it means being able to be together with Yongsun. Though, life does not always play by our rules. That's the reality.
Just as the thought came across her mind, she heard a familiar ding, signaling a new message from her other half. Her hand shook as she attempted to reach for her phone. She pressed the power button, expecting for the worst case scenario. She was right.
Yeah. It was for the best.
Also posted on twt and aff -> @teddehber
