feel free to keep scrolling, i'm sorry
months ago [almost half a year] when i started cutting, i did my best to hide it from my family. because i knew they would turn it into some suffering i've inflicted on them. a few weeks ago, my mother said [with annoyance, while telling me to do her work], "are you mentally insane? when will you stop cutting?" i didn't know what to say [like do you think your child who was diagnosed with clinical depression years ago, who didn't get treatment because you don't believe in depression, who hasn't left the house in a year, doesn't interact with anyone, doesn't eat properly, doesn't shower or change clothes regularly, avoids you as much as possible, cries every other night, is mentally stable?] i know i'm venting but just a while ago, she said again [accusingly] "why are you torturing us? what was our sin? that we gave you importance? even after all the loss you caused us, we haven't said anything to you [they have. many many times]" i didn't reply because there was no point. there is nothing i could have said that i haven't already, tens of times. even when i'm screaming and falling apart [have been falling apart for as long as i can remember], i have no right to my pain. it all belongs to them. anyway, here are some beautiful photographs to get lost into:
© Katelyn Beecroft
© Matt Anderson Photography/Getty Images
© imageBROKER/Moritz Wolf/Getty Images
© SinghaphanAllB/Getty Images
