She told me “ i know a spot” then took me to the lowest spot of my life .

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She told me “ i know a spot” then took me to the lowest spot of my life .
What is something I should forgive myself for? Why haven't I forgiven myself before & can I forgive myself now?
I should forgive myself for all the pasts mistakes I have made. I should forgive myself for not knowing things that I was never taught. How to deal with emotions, being affectionate, understanding love, living without chaos, and everything else my parents couldn't teach me. I should forgive myself for not being perfect. I should forgive myself for the chances I didn't have and the things I didn't know.
I haven't forgiven myself because I didn't know those were things that needed to be forgiven. I also still had lessons I needed to learn from them.
I can forgive myself for the things I did and learnt from. Once I learn from the others I will forgive them to.
In half an hour is going to be me first time in the psychologist... I'm going to puke, I'm so nervous :S
“Self care isn’t selfish”