#nb probs

[queerzaza]

Mum:(turns to me as she chats to a mutual friend) Tell me again, what am I supposed to say? "she?" "him?"

me: no, "they/them" Mum. I prefer gender-neutral pronouns, i'm non-binary. remember, genderqueer, not male or female.

Mum: You can't go by "they", it's grammatically incorrect.

me: well tht's not actually true, but at least can make an exception? ya kno, just to make your progeny happy?

Mum: *thinks for a moment* Nope, that is too hard. I'll just skip 'em.

me: fine, tht's just fine.

[queerzaza]

Hey Zaza, I identify and nonbinary, but I also have wanted to get top surgery for years now. The issue is that I don't think I feel any dysphoria when it comes to my chest; at the same time though I remember hitting puberty when I was younger and looking at myself in the mirror and thinking that my body was wrong, and as I got older I caught myself wishing that I had a more masculine looking chest. I guess I'm just kinda having doubts about my feelings? Any Advice?

i say, go for it! tht’s cuz i believe tht we have full body autonomy. you wanna pierce your ears-go for it. you wanna tattoo ur bicep- go for it. you wanna get a new nose- go for it! go for whatever “it” is...

.. as long as you’ve fulfilled two key points. first, you’ve thought long and hard about the body modification and it’s truly what you want. second, you’re doing this for you and your happiness. if you meet both those (and you’re an adult, claro!) then go for it! 

this body is yours to do, whatever you choose to do with it. which means you get to decide how you want to look and change whatever you feel needs changing. wishing you good luck, Sim turtledove!!!

[queerzaza]

Zaza, I think I'd like to start a profile on a dating app. However, I don't know of a good free app for nonbinary people, and I'm totally lost as to how to really reach out to people. Any advice?

well there’s lots of trouble to be found at any site, but i hear a lot of good things from LGBT ppl who use OKCupid, so perhaps give tht one a shot? ugh, i’m going to have to do tht soon, so i feel ya, dove.

hiya-any other NB turtledoves have an answer to help?????

[queerzaza]

thinking bout makin it official and having my students call me Mx. Zaza

any fun or creative ideas with which i can introduce my non-binary honourific?

[quasimagical]

it's my sister's graduation day so i'm wearing nice femme clothes and it looks nice but it feels so unnatural for me lmao

[wizardnaturalist]

I just want a flat chest is that too much to ask

[queerzaza]

there's a lot of stigmatization of nonbinary people at my college, because recently people have been latching onto the idea that people here who come out as nonbinary are doing it because it's cool/trendy, or because they want attention. i have very recently started to grapple with the idea that i may be gender fluid/nonbinary, but I'm really hesitant to come out for these reasons. I feel really really paranoid about being seen as dramatic/attention seeking/fake. Any thoughts?

yup, totally common. ppl are always quick to label others as “special snowflakes.” but who cares, you are you and their judgy opinions don’t matter. the only voice tht does- is the one in your heart. you listen to that one and you’ll be alright, dove.

you’ve got to live your life for you and no one else turtledove. it’s the only way to find true happiness. best of luck to you!

[goldwyrtsdotror]

Sometimes im demigirl, sometimes im demiboy, sometimes im nonbinary, and sometimes im agender. Like can my brain stop being an asshole and.... idk... maybe just pick 1, maybe 2 genders??. .