#nbla safe

[ryskyourheart]

The pain I feel in my body is nothing when compared to the pain of longing for you. I ache for your love. I cry out for your touch. I miss you every minute you are not with me.

[ryskyourheart]

Shaking, shivering, I am wishing for you, waiting for your arms to hold me tight and bring me warmth.

It's so cold here inside and out, and I am only soothed by the soft fabric, wanting to share it with you.

Ice outside and a whooshing wind scaring me. I lose my sleep. I lose so much. I lose myself.

Someone loves me, but they're far away. I sniffle and swallow down my fear, knowing you'll be there soon. But I ache.

Pain shoots through my shoulder and I have to adjust. My posture is bad but I like being curled up. Seeking comfort, I only am sore for now.

Someday it will be alright; I'll be warm, you will shield me from the sheets of ice and clouds of snow. If I get scared you will only need to gently shush me, and I'll remember where I am.

Soon, but not yet. Not now. Not today. I wish it could be today. But the wait gives me time to grow. And maybe I can learn how to be strong, so I can sooth your aches and quell your shivers too.

Next to me, there is nobody there. I pull the blanket tighter around myself, like a shell I can't let go of.

Still shaking.

[ryskyourheart]

When all of this is over, I’ll find you

I’ll knock on your door, with a smile on my face and a gift in my hands

Then you’ll be in my arms and my eyes

I need you so much

My heart hurts and I feel empty

I will fill the void with your love

My beautiful love, the dawn of my day

We will be together someday

I’m trying my best to not fall apart without you here

But I feel so bad for all that I want

You say it’s alright but I still worry that it hurts you to know all this

I can heal your wounds, but only if I can see them and soothe them

I can only wrap a bandage around them in person.

I can only kiss the cuts in spirit now, but someday I will kiss them for real.

I love you deeply and I miss you dearly.

We will be together soon. Just a little longer now.

Hold on to your hope. I’m coming home soon.

Please wait for me, don’t give up on me.

[ryskyourheart]

I want to share a warm bowl of soup with you

Or a nice conversation over cups of cocoa, bundled up by the fireplace.

I want to watch your eyes light up when you take the first bite of the cake I bake for you.

I wish to see you in the glow of candlelight, or surrounded by cascading petals in spring.

I love you.

[ryskyourheart]

Can you feel it? The heat and the rush from standing so close to the fire? I think I’m way too close, but I want to feel it more.

It’s not bad, is it? I’m not hooked in yet. It’s all just a dream until I make it real. Nothing’s gonna change unless I say it can, so why be afraid?

I’m strong, and I can do whatever I wish. Whatever I please.

I’m okay.

The fire may be creeping closer, but I’m not chained in place. If it gets too close, I can just back up. I can put it out.

I won’t burn up.

[ryskyourheart]

I want to call you on the phone and hear your beautiful voice.

Hold your hand in mine and turn to see your beautiful face.

Brush your lovely hair and hear your cute laugh when it tickles.

Wrap you in my arms and see your bright smile.

I want to have all of that and more, and someday soon it will happen.

Soon, but not soon enough.

I miss you.

[ryskyourheart]

I can’t wait for that day when we can have it all

I’ll hold your hand and see your smile

And nothing will ever be able to stand in our way

I’ll catch you when you fall

And you’ll catch me too

We’ll help each other up

I’ll be dreaming of you

We both have some time until we finally can be us

For now I’ll let it be you and me

I want it to be now but I also want it to be so much later

I can’t wait for you but I’ll also wait forever

Just don’t leave me if I fall down and can’t find the strength even with you

It’s not your fault, and we can heal each other’s brokenness or at least try to make it through

I love you. And I’ll see you soon

[ryskyourheart]

Is it bad?

If I’m sad?

If I don’t know how I hurt you?

Why can’t I admit I’m wrong?

For not wanting to desert you?

Can I heal?

Can I deal?

Can I get that splinter of broken iron out of my heart and my lungs and head and

I

Don’t want

To feel

Like this anymore

And I just

Want to be happy with what I have

I’m happier than I’ve ever been

But still I can’t quite get past

Everything that has gone missing here

I feel the hole in my life

But I guess what I’m trying to say

Is I’m here.

I’m not going anywhere.

I’m not gonna keep chasing after you

Cause I see how weird it is and I’m through

But I’ll be here

Waiting for your call.

Not sitting by the phone

But I’ll still pick it up if I know it’s you.

I won’t be crazy about it,

I just want you to know

That I’m here.

I won’t chase you again

But I won’t chase you away

I’m ready whenever you are, my friend.