@neiticora replied to your post: @neiticora replied to your post: ...
I nearly choked reading your last tag. But in general, I’m a casual fan and don’t know nor care about MCU fandom much. I just cherry pick stuff that I enjoy. That’s apparently my saving grace.
dude, let me tell you. all lokis in journal rp also like to choke. on thor's dick. THERE'S A LOT GOING ON OVER THERE AND IT WAS JUST HARD TO DEAL WITH FOR A LONG TIME yeah i am a pretty casual fan in comparison and every now and then i get hit hard in my feelings (lookin' at you, tws)
I really really want to see Ryder confusedly confessing to a girlfriend (regular, platonic gf) her feelings to Jaal. Like... "Listen Cora, I'm going mad and I have to talk to someone. Don't laugh. I think I'm..." And the friend's reaction, of course!
Wren Ryder and Cora sat across from each other on the Tempest’s broad table, Ryder pushing reconstituted eggs around with her fork, Cora reading something a datapad but looking up periodically as the fork hit the surface with a clang that destroyed the fragile silence sacred to breakfast.
With a sigh, Cora put her datapad down. “Ryder, what’s bothering you?”
Rather than just opening up (Jaal would be ashamed,) Ryder grew defensive. “Nothing’s wrong, Cora. Everything is normal. Perfect. Peachy.” Another circle of eggs on her plate, pushing a little more aggressively this time.
Cora rested her face on her fist, using her free hand to rub small circles on her temple. “Cut the crap, Ryder. Don’t make me call in Lexi for a psych eval.” This was no idle threat- if Cora said she’d do something, it would happen.
Okay. Fine then. Alarmed, Ryder put down her fork and pushed the plate away. “We’re speaking in hypotheticals here. Understand?”
“Perfectly.” Was Cora trying not to smile?
“What if, hypothetically, you were some big, important title in the Initiative. You had your own ship, and your own crew. The crew is great, and you like them a lot, but there’s one of them you like more than you should.” Her hands were looking for something to do, anything. Not looking at Cora’s knowing smile and nodding head, she snatched a cup of coffee, swirling a spoon through it in broad spirals. One, two, three. “You even meet his- or her- family. But isn’t it kind of… unethical? Or something. It’s one of your crew. An abuse of power. Asking for a friend. For a hypothetical. Not for me.” Very convincing. Very smooth. She hadn’t even managed to trick herself into believing it. Finally she looked up from her coffee.
Cora was still smirking, damn her. “I’d say that there’s paperwork you have to fill out with Lexi’s approval. Theoretically, of course. I would also say that I could email the forms to the interested party- commander and crew liaisons, form 90417 B.” She bent over her omni-tool for a few seconds, swiping through something and then leaning back. “I think, in this purely hypothetical situation, a woman’s friends might ask her if she’s sure, though.” The smile faded slightly; it was still prepared to emerge again, but caution had clouded Cora’s features.
Ryder couldn’t keep up with this charade for any longer. “Listen, Cora. I feel like I’m going crazy and I just had to talk with someone about it. Don’t laugh, but I think I’m in love.” Actually, she might laugh at herself just for saying that, sounding like a teenager too caught up in the emotions of her first real relationship to understand there was a world outside her own feelings.
“And Jaal?” Gently, Cora pulled the coffee cup away from Ryder, shaking her head. “You don’t need more caffeine right now.” Fair point.
“He took me to meet his family.” To her credit, Ryder managed not to turn entirely red- just partially, high on her cheekbones and the tips of her ears. “I think it’s serious.” And there was only so much longer she could keep it quiet from the rest of the crew, especially when she wanted things so many normal couples seemed to take for granted- holding hands, those light touches that said your lover was there, a kiss on the lips when the opportunity came.
Lifting her eyebrows, Cora stroked her chin in an oversized gesture, clearly mimicking thinking deeply about the situation. “Does he make you happy?” she finally asked.
Another moment of feeling stupid, of wanting to sigh dreamily and act like someone ten years her junior. “Sometimes he’s the only thing in this damn galaxy that makes being Pathfinder bearable.”
“Then do it. You’ve been happier lately. Don’t forget that you’re still only human, Ryder. Your dad did, sometimes, but you’re not your dad.” For the first time, there was no criticism as Cora said those last words. It was simply a statement of fact. “Fill out the forms. I think someone is here to see you, by the way.” Nodding to the stairwell that led up to the comm table (which was also their breakfast, lunch, and dinner space,) Cora stood and gave Ryder another nod and a wink before vanishing down the other side of the stairs, her breakfast plate in hand, clapping Jaal on the shoulder as she did so.
Ah, shit. “Jaal! How long were you listening?” Was there any egg stuck in her teeth? Did she reek of coffee? No and no, thankfully.
In the dubious privacy, Jaal pulled Ryder into his arms, crushing her to his chest and kissing the top of her head. “Enough,” he finally answered. “Your people must fill out forms to be with one another?” He sounded confused, but still didn’t release her, and she was glad to rest her head on his chest, feeling it rise and fall with every breath he took. It felt risky to do this out in the open when no one else in the ship really knew, except for Cora, but if they were going to go public anyway…
“No, not at all. It’s just because you’re technically a member of my crew. You don’t mind signing it?” What if he didn’t want to? What if he found the human concept of military permissions too obviously foreign and decided that the cultural boundaries were too much?
“Give it to me right now. I’ll sign as many forms as I have to, to be with you.” Oh. That was okay then.
11. Bandages with Evfra/Sara or Jaal/Sara! Much love from your friendly Angaran prompt-AI.
Evfra is bleeding.
For only being three words long, the thought sure is the sneeze that causes an avalanche in Sara’s brain. One - holy shit that looks bad. Two - medigel works on angara, right? Where’s Jaal when you need him? Three-
Did he take that instead of me?
Evfra is a brutal fighter when he has the freedom for it. She’s seen him snipe a target from truly breathtaking distances if the mission requires it, but she still remembers the gleam in his eyes in the split-second before the kett had ambushed them.
It resonates. She’d charged into battle with the same wild ferocity she always wielded, and he had joined her in the middle of the fray, slaughtering kett with the same terrifying efficiency he did everything. Including taking hits for her, apparently. Sara’s brain rocks back to reality as he stumbles, and she moves quickly to stabilise him, sliding under one of his arms.
“Heyheyhey, I’ve got you,” she says, except he’s of course refusing to rest his weight on her. That earns him a scowl, which gets her a blank look in return, because it’s just her luck to be saddled with the one angara in the universe allergic to sharing his feelings.
“I do not,” he growls, “require your assistance, Pathfinder.”
“Yeah, yeah, tell me again when you haven’t just had your back torn open.” She squints up at him as they stagger their way back to the relative shelter of the Nomad, before straight up kicking him in the shin. He grunts, sags for a second, and then gives her a look that’s somewhere between rolling his eyes and tearing her head off.
But he lets her lead him to the Nomad, so Sara’s going to consider this one a win.
She raises her voice for a second. “Vetra? Watch our backs, would you? We don’t seem to be that great at doing it ourselves.”
“Already on it,” the turian’s dry tones report back.
Evfra’s eyes flicker after her, return to Sara. They’re disconcertingly blue, and wow, now is definitely not the time to be thinking about that.
“You trust your team,” he says.
She lowers him to the ground, thanking her dubious parking skills for landing them next to one of the heat lamps the kett had set up. Warmth and cover, a good first start. And, her memory pings, Jaal has definitely used medigel before. Sara fumbles for some of her supply. Good step two.
“With my life,” she says. “Look, I’m not a doctor, but I’ve got medigel and steady hands that are going to reach this wound of yours a lot easier than yours are. Will you let me deal with it?”
He looks at her for so long that she starts to wonder if the translators have borked. She opens her mouth to repeat it, but he makes some kind of noise in the back of his throat, shaking his head. Frustration, she realises, although if it’s for her or himself she can’t tell.
“In this, at least, I’ll trust you.”
“Thanks,” she mutters,, crouching behind him. The round ripped through his armour when his shields were nearly depleted, and weeps a sluggish blue. Ugly to look at, but Sara’s just grateful not to be using words like pouring or gushing.
Honestly, she should probably have him removed the armour for this, but they’re still in uncertain territory, and...on Voeld. Heat lamp or not, it’s fucking freezing.
“You underestimate the importance of the angaran Resistance leader presenting an alien with his back,” he says flatly.
“I kind of thought our relationship had moved beyond that. I’m applying medigel,” she warns, not wanting to surprise a guy who just announced she’s lucky to be helping him at all. “Come on, Evfra. What do I have to do to prove I’m not here to hurt you?” A beat. “Or - or the rest of the angara.”
“I trust your intentions.” He doesn’t move other than breathing as she applies the medigel, sort of...awkwardly poking it to cover the worst parts of the wound, working around the cracked armour. “I even trust your skill. And I trust that you will do everything in your power to keep your people safe. The same as I would.”
Sara’s hands still, pressed flat to his back. She can feel the faintest rise and fall of his torso and - and the smallest tremble running through his form. Not bioelectricity, something else. Your people. Her mind flashes to the Tempest first, of course, but the Initiative is hard on its heels. The angara are allies - close allies, and Sara thinks that Evfra knows she’d do her damnedest to keep them safe in almost any situation imaginable.
Unless.
She draws in a gulp of icy air, the next best thing to just beating her head against the side of the Nomad. It would be nice, Sara thinks, if one thing in her life could be simple. Just one thing.
“So what does that make me?” she asks, immediately inserting her foot into her mouth instead. Classic Ryder. “Because last I checked, that hit was coming right for me.”
She watches helplessly as his shoulders stiffen, and then he’s twisting, unfolding until he towers over her. Sara remains cross-legged on the ground, eyeing her goop covered fingers and determinedly pretending like she hadn’t just insinuated she meant something to the head of the Resistance. Strategy, she expects him to say. Or, politics. The last thing I need to deal with is your people making a fuss about the death of the human Pathfinder.
Except it seems that Evfra is subject to the same sentiments as the rest of the angara when it comes it emotion, if in his own taciturn way. What she gets instead is a hand in her face, and a gruff - very gruff--
“You are important.”
There’s a hideous sort of intimacy to the admission, coming from a man who had so brusquely explained the death of his family to her.
“Oh,” she says unsteadily. He’s the injured one, but she allows him to pull her to her feet. She stumbles a little because she’s Sara Ryder, free hand flying up to steady herself against his chest. “Right.”
His eyes are really blue. Alien, and all too recognisable at the same time. He fails to let go of her hand, and she fails to move hers from his chest. That fine tremor, she notes dizzily, slowly eases out of him. Like he’s become more certain of something, in this breathless moment between them.
“Incoming!” Vetra calls, and the sound of gunfire snaps Sara right back into Pathfinder mode.
“Get down!” she barks at Evfra, reaching for for her shotgun and forgetting everything about who and what he is at the same time.
His lips peel back from his teeth in an expression that might be a smirk, or might be a snarl, and if there were less kett incoming, Sara might find either option kind of (very) interesting.
“You must be joking,” he says, shields flickering to life around his form.
“Ugh,” Sara says back, summoning her biotics and Charging the enemy in lieu of dealing with him and the riot of feelings the man stirs in her.
It’s probably the first time in the history of Andromeda that anyone has ever been glad of the kett for a rescue.
@neiticora replied to your post: “the first Andromeda romance mod hit the Nexus. the mod makes it...”:
...I'm probably missing some note here, but why is this a bad thing? They made all the romances available for both Ryders. What's the problem? Honest question.
Gil and Suvi are gay. They are super gay. And they are the only explicitly, exclusively gay characters we were given.
It's pretty meager representation (as non-squadmates they have less content, and ham-handed content at that), but it's what we have, and promoting a mod which erases that representation is abhorrent to me. To a lot of people. The very same people who asked this same modder to remove her Straight Sera and Straight Dorian DAI mods from the Nexus. Which she refused to do, and the Nexus backed her up.
Oh! But the mod erases heterosexuality, too! That’s unfair, too!
Yes and no.
Yes, because by the same, blind metric that is technically correct, but also no.
No, because who gives a fuck.
No, because from the moment squadmate/crew sexuality was debated and decided around a table that prioritized the straight male gamer, we as non-straights lost the ability to share equal standing.
Whatever heterosexual loss is perceived by a mod that changes a character from straight to gay or bisexual. . .well, that’s something they can afford to lose.
For the rest of us, for a lot of us, what we lose is so much more valuable.
I'M DYING TO HEAR EVERYTHING ABOUT SWCO. I know you already posted some, but moooooaaaarrr, need mooooaaar!
I WILL POST MOREEEEEE MY DARLING!!!
I’ve been busy in academia land (and will continue to be so sadly T_T) BUT HIGHLIGHTS BY DAY
TUESDAY: T -2 SWCO
I run from Symposium to airport in business apparel
My baby sister calls and I’m like “gotta run going to SWCO”
She immediately begins shaming me for like NOT COSPLAYING
Her exact words: “what kind of nerd are you??”
Me: “what is this callout?!?!”
I land!
I see @lariren-shadow
I lie down a lot
@red-applesith and her bf show up as well
I MEET @shelikespretties
THE END
WEDNESDAY: T -1 SWCO
I FINALLY MEET @thewayofthetrashcompactor
Shopping occurs because the airbnb has like a fridge and we’re like HEALTHY PEOPLE
we make attempts to be healthy people
Finally, the group of us head to the convention center around 8 because like
the organizers said line up starts at 8
and like WE RECOGNIZE THAT LIKE PEOPLE LINE UP EARLIER but usually the organizers actively dissuade this from occurring
The organizers of SWCO did not get this memo.
Like AT ALL
The line had already started wrapping around the convention center.
Us:….huh
Finally we’re let in, where it’s still SUPRISE SURPISE A DISORGANIZED CLUSTERFUCK
We get in the the first of many lines for the opening panel/40th anniversary panel
consequently, I am now very very good at standing in line
I MEET RAY PARK AND HE’S VERY PLEASANT.
I don’t think he was supposed to be like signing and taking pictures BUT HE DID SO BLESS HIM
We lay down our stuff and like begin to accept our life for the evening once they close the doors at 12AM.
Also realize the hall….has no wi-fi.
am briefly hit by Regret at this point
THURSDAY: SWCO DAY 1 or I Swear to Fucking God I Will Murder Whoever Though a Rave at 1PM Would Be a Good Idea
We’re woken up by like ULTRA LOUD MUSIC IN THE CONVENTION HALL
And first, everyone is like OH DID SOMEONE COOL COME??
Ans: No, it’s just DJ Elliot. Also known as the whitest DJ in existence. NO ONE NEEDS A TECHNO VERSION OF TSWIFT
EVERYONE IN THE HALL IS MUTUALLY UNHAPPY ABOUT THIS
because we need to be up at like 5am to like LINE UP YET AGAIN and reflect on our life choices
also the Convention Hall lights are perpetually on, the AC is like AIMED TO BE a foot parallel to the floor, and concrete is really fucking hard even with a blanket
No for real, whoever thought that was a good idea i am going to fight them
Finally start lining up again
shout out to @lariren-shadow standing in line to grab us coffee
so many lines
why were there so many lines
Evidently, the 5AM lines were going into the highway
Eventually, get THE WRISTBAND FOR GALAXY STAGE and feel mildly vindicated
THE 40TH PANEL WAS AMAZING!!
I vaguely regret not splurging on a photo op with Hayden but 1) money and 2) LINES
But the panel was #lovingly dragging George Lucas on his non-existent dialogue skills
Also how does Ian McDiramid (?) LOOK SO SPRY???
Is it blood? THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW
Then went to the Billy Dee Williams Panel (pictures will come soon)
he was….so so chill
ALSO THERE WAS A SUPER SUPER CUTE BB!LANDO COSPLAY
Then walked around for a bit and like hunted down crew members to be like “so about the line up procedure”
Crew Member 1: “the official word is that we have on the site”
Crew Member 2: “yeah, nothing’s changed in response to last night/morning.
Us:…cool.
PROMPTLY GET IN LINE AT 3PM FOR THE LAST JEDI PANEL
Run back to airbnb to change my shirt and like deorandant
Jen finally gets back from the Celebration Store. Evidently they were stuck in line for 5 hours
Run back to grab cosplay and also some water
EAT DELIVERY IN LINE BECAUSE FOOD IS IMPORTANT
and probably last #actual food till post-panel the next day
FRIDAY: SWCO DAY2
THERE WAS NO RAVE AND ALL WERE THANKFUL
RIAN JOHNSON SHOWED UP!
and stayed for 3 hours??
I felt bad post panel because I was like oh my god he’s so kind???
Also, it felt like HE REALLY RESPECTED CARRIE FOR HER SCRIPTWRITING ABILITIES AND ASDFSDFSDFDF
more wandering occurred? I think? IT’S A BLUR T B H
OH WE WENT HOME BECAUSE CONCRETE, FLOOR, NOT FUN
THE POSTER IS RAD THOUGH
and red
hahaha I am so so clever *LIES DOWN*
like I legit meant to like STAY AWAKE to like NOT WRECK MY SLEEP SCHEDULE and like lie down for like an hour
which turned into four and I just said screw it and went back to sleep
SATURDAY: SWCO DAY 3
Very lowkey day
Debated trying to get into the store.
Saw the line and was like, “hahahhahahahahah over my dead body”
Walked around a bit instead
BOUGHT THE THRAWN BOOK but sadly not the celebration one because evidently that sold out within 5 minutes and I refused to fight people for it
ALSO DARK DISCIPLE….which means I should watch the rest of clone wars
ALSO LIFE DEBT
debated also buying Empire’s End but I refuse to buy more hardcovers than I need to and also HEAVY
I’m really disappointed by the map that SWCO had on their app because it was really awful/I was spoiled by the ease that SDCC had
Went to some of the writing panels!
FOUND OUT THAT PHASMA (also known as the only other member of the F.O. that I care about) IS GETTING A COMIC AND A BOOK
Went to the Cantina panel that Pablo was on, which was surprisingly crowded?
Then went to the Christie Golden panel on writing as well!
Grabbed dinner at the pub where the reylo meetup was supposed to be
Went to the Reylo meetup
THEY WERE ALL LOVELY
I didn’t mean to scare @cobwebbing !!! It….just kind of happened….
Found out that oh god people do actually read my fic
oh god, I am so so sorry
SEE MORE RAMBLING HERE
SUNDAY: SWCO DAY 4
WOKE UP SUPER EARLY TO GET INTO THE STORE TO GET A CERTAIN SOMEONE A SHIRT
as well as like me
like i needed something to validate my prescence and all the lines
We were there at like 5:30 and the line was already ridiculous
Eventually got in, and stood in line….again
Took a nap because I WAS TIRED
Finally got in and briskly walked to the Celebration Store….
and got into the “lightspeed lane” for 11AM
so I like walked around some more till they let me in
THAT STORE HAD BEEN STRIPPED PRETTY HARD
*cries* I JUST WANTED THE BB-8 ORANGE SHIRT
I bought some shirts though!
AND MUGS
AND KYLO SQOOSH BALL THINGY
And then ordered indian food for dinner because everything closes on Easter for some reason
proceed to stuff everything into my suitcase and realize I didn’t wear half the clothes I brought
I'm curious - why the name Sarianna? Where did it come from? :)
Hi neiticora! Thanks for ask. I am also curious why you are curious about it haha.
Basically, I wanted to be able to have my OC’s name as “Sara Ryder” in game so they can use her first name via voice acting. At the same time, I wanted something prettier than “Sara” while being long enough of a name that she might consider it too formal.
I tried to combine the first syllable “Sar” with endings common for more “feminine” names (or names gendered as that of a woman).
Sar + ina
Sar + ana
Sarina or Sarana just didn’t sound good to me, or else it also sounded too much like “Serena” - a name ruined forever by Gossip Girl (nothing against the show, but I do have something against the character of Serena haha). I basically mixed the two to get Sarianna. I’m sorry it’s so random!
neiticora replied to your post“Bless all you writers for the Jaara fics pouring in on ao3, please...”
Please recommend some! Especially if you know some non-spoilery ones (Journey to Meridian is next for me).
My absolute faaaavorites so far are by octobig here (jaal’s romance scene) and here (movie night spoilers, forgot at what point in the game that happens)
The Jaal/Sara tag is worth checking out as a whole right now too, since there’s only a few pages to shuffle through so far. :) From what I’ve seen most of the fics put their spoilers in the tags so it should be safe to look around.
OH MAN i have probably written too many fics to answer this properly but let’s give it a shot.
After, a pjo AU set two years after Percy and Annabeth broke up because they were taking their Tartarus trauma out on each other.
Every time I look at you, she says, I see the end of the world.
And he has to let go of her, because clenching his fists and hating himself are more necessary than holding on.
I know.
A Finer Chain, a post-six of crows grisha AU in which the characters from the Grisha trilogy have to deal with what parem means for them. Including Alina.
Alina glances back at Mal, just once. Brown eyes scrape his face, searching for something. All he can do is love her, and maybe that’s enough, or maybe it’s not. Whatever the answer, she finds what she’s looking for. She turns away.
Her hand is pale as she stretches it up to Tolya, but the man is kneeling before it reaches him. Her fingers hover in the air for a moment, caught in the light. She doesn’t tremble now.
every fall comes from a height, a star wars fic in which Rey muses on the darkness inside her, and how to fight it.
It isn’t fair. That’s a brand new thought for Rey. The only way to get through life as a scavenger is acceptance, a slow conviction that everything is fine, I’ll be okay like this. If she had never left Jakku, Rey knows that she would have lived out the rest of her life telling herself that, and there’s something obscene about that.
renewal, a star wars fic in which Luke finds out he’s going to be an uncle.
He kisses her forehead. “Don’t worry. The Force isn’t like - brown eyes, or dark hair. The Dark Side doesn’t filter down through generations.”
Her tone turns dry, grateful at the same time. “Right. So if something goes wrong, it’s all my fault.”
“Nothing’s going to go wrong,” he assures her. A beat. “Besides. Let’s be real here, if something did happen, it’d probably be Han’s fault.”
such a quiet thing, to fall, a star wars fic about how Rey creeps under Kylo Ren’s skin.
He has wanted. That is what it is, to be of the Dark Side. You want and you want and you want, until it gnaws a hole inside you and lets everything else spill out. You wait for the darkness to creep in, only to realise it has already made its home there.
