the idea that being nonbinary can be a stepping stone to "fully identifying as (male/female)" can coexist with the fact that for some people identifying as binary male or female is, in fact, the stepping stone to a fully realized non-binary identity and life.
when i came out as trans i originally began labelling myself "nonbinary" because it felt like a way to soft-launch my coming out with my generally accepting peers.
when i started transitioning more outwardly i then came to label myself a trans woman. i thought that being trans-female or transfeminine was what i was meant to be and it seemed fine enough to me to go with it.
then, over the years of experiencing and experimenting with my gender presentation and expressions i came to grow into my full and wholly nonbinary identity as a transfeminine butch.
never fully woman, not even necessarily "woman-adjacent" but always in relation to my past experiences with womanhood and the societal expectations that cling to it.
i am nonbinary. my experiences with womanhood are kaleidoscopic and do not invalidate my existence as a nonbinary butch but they are my experiences and in turn also do not invalidate another person's apparently inverse experience.
someone else's experience might be the inverse and thats equally valid, some people's questioning of the binary leads them to come to affirmation of their binary womanhood or manhood and thats also beautiful.
womanhood and manhood don't need to be rigid, toxic or emprisoning, they themselves can be diverse and wonderful universes to inhabit.
