Told my parents about my first breakup...
Parents: God loves you
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Told my parents about my first breakup...
Parents: God loves you
so uhhh like. a friend of mine is acting reeeeally problematic towards me, a transdude, and another friend, a transgirl. every time someone calls my friend "she" in a call or otherwise, he'll literally shout "HE!!!!!" and when they call me a he, he'll then shout "SHE!!!!!" this makes me and my friend both suuuuper uncomfortable so what do i do? ive tried communicating this to him but he says we're "not really trans". he also casually uses the tr/nny slur and is openly lesbophobic. hh help??
Hey there!
If I were you, I’d stop being friends with this dude. He seems really unsupportive of you two, and I wouldn’t want to be around someone who doesn’t support me for who I am. It gets stressful and frustrating after awhile, and I’d get sick of it even after a few days.
But, if you have faith in him, then I’d suggest to try and talk to him more about this and tell him how he’s being rude. Maybe after awhile, he’ll be more accepting and won’t try and push the wrong pronouns onto you and other people. It’s hard to change someone’s opinion most of the time—especially in a situation like this—but maybe he can change and become more accepting.
I apologise if this comes off as rude, that wasn’t my intention. I hope this helps, and stay safe!
Trying to convince my mom to watch the Pitt but she doesn’t think I should watch the pilot for the 3rd time in 6 days
Y’all my partner wants to take a turn as DM so I’ll actually get to play 🥺 when we decided to do his one shot campaign (over the course of several sessions) is months away like in august but like I’ve already started creating my character.
Friendly reminder that if you have family who say they ‘tolerate’ you being lgbtq+ so long as certain conditions they lay down are met, they aren’t truly supportive! Their acceptance of your identity shouldn’t be conditional. Here’s some criteria that I’ve seen false supportive parents set down for their children to meet in order to be tolerated
- getting good grades
- being able to ‘pass’ as straight or cis
- not bringing up the lgbtq+ community in front of them
- following parent’s ‘plan’ for their child (i.e. forcing children to follow the path the parents want the child to go down instead of letting their children decide for themselves)
- being as normal as possible aside from being lgbtq+
None of this is okay, and you deserve better! If you have family like this, try to distance yourself from them as much as possible, because their stupid ‘requirements’ will only be a detriment to your mental health. Try to find support from people who truly accept you and never listen to people like that!
Have a nice day and please stay safe!
Hi, so I'm a trans demiboy, and I'm in middle school. My mom and dad are pretty traditional and won't let me get my hair cut shorter than above my chin (very girly haircut) and I'm afraid to come out. I tested my mom with a trans idol of mine and she said some pretty transphobic things. I don't think if I come out they'll kick me out, but they just won't me do anything to look more masculine. My mom won't even let me wear a button up shirt. Moving out seems like forever away. What do I do?
Hey there, Anon!
Before I say anything else, I’m going to tell you this: if you feel like you’re not safe or know for sure that you’re not safe if you come out, please do not come out yet. It can be stressful and depressing that you can’t come out and be the real you around those who are supposed to love and support you the most, but I want for you to stay safe. But, in the mean time, you can at least do a few things:
Reach out to LGBT+ support groups that have a transgender support branch or focus on transgender people. If you can help it, specifically look for groups that focus on transgender youth. Now this can range from groups in your area to online groups.
There’s the transgender blogs here on Tumblr, of course. There’s also LGBT accounts on Instagram that post LGBT content and are probably more than happy to give you advice and support you.
There’s also LGBT+ groups on a support app called Huddle. If I remember correctly, there is a group specifically for transgender youth.
The It Gets Better Project is a project that allows you to look at stories of LGBT+ people, share your own story, find help in your community, and/or take a pledge.
The Trevor Project is a project aimed at LGBT+ youth when they feel suicidal, are in a crisis, or need to talk. They have five things that you can find on their website: the TrevorLifeline, TrevorChat, TrevorText, TrevorSpace, and Trevor Support Centre.
Finally, there’s the new Trans Lifeline. Right now, they have lifeline numbers for the U.S. and Canada. If you need help and are in one of the two countries, you can call the number that corresponds with your country and they’ll try to give you the help that you need.
Now I’m going to tell you what I recommend. You don’t have to necessarily follow this, this is just my recommendation. Naturally slip the topic of being transgender in normal conversations once and awhile and see how your parents react. If they seem transphobic even after a few conversations and/or are getting suspicious, lay low for awhile and then try again. But, if they become harsh about it, do not come out to them. If they seem accepting of it, try building up to courage to come out to them and go from there. Maybe you and your parents can talk it out and come to an agreement that you’re both happy about.
And I know that moving out seems a long ways away, but it’ll be here soon. For now, please stay strong and hang in there. These years will soon fly by, and then you’ll be able to move out and maybe even start transitioning without your parents having a say so in it if that’s what you want to do. Finally, remember that you’re valid, loved, and supported by others—both by those you do know and those you don’t know of.
I hoped this helped, and please stay safe!
Hey um. I came out as transmasc to my husband tonight and my marriage is over and I’m devastated and I need support. Please, anything you can give.
Hi. I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to answer this quicker. If he can’t love you for who you are, he doesn’t deserve you. You are worthy of love. Here’s a website that can help you remember these things: https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/docs/PositiveAffirmations.pdf (sorry it looks ugly, I’m on mobile)