#notloveless

[acrossdeeprivers]

“...but not Loveless.”

Love for HIM or HER but love for THEM too.

And most especially, love for YOU. 

[thereplypost-blog]

Post Card #24

I love.

Aro/Aces are not loveless…I’ve heard this bandied around on social media by the stupidly insensitive, and I have just got to say…it’s just bizarre.

The light in my Aro/Ace eyes is the light that knows the world. The cornerstone of how I love is to be able to see beauty in every living thing without needing to keep it.

The problem for me is that people confuse desire with love and love with possession. If you see a flower that is beautiful you must possess it! Own it. But a flower cannot do without its bush, or water, or the sun. It is there doing what it and its kin have been doing for centuries before you even came along.

The desire to keep someone will eventually destroy them, or irrevocably change them until the person they were is so completely different to who you met you end up resenting them.  Societies mores and conventions regarding sexual and romantic desire are a terrible violence on our bodies and minds.

‘Love’ in all its forms is not a silly Valentines day card or Romance TM, or True Love TM or RomCom or any other cotton candy fallacy society sees fit to throw at us as an ideal truth. The true freedom and gentleness of love’s little voice are phenomenal, beautiful. Hopeful. Love in my world seeks to nurture, not possess. Love is a state of being that cannot be touched or kept, like little butterflies that fly around. Will, you catch them and put them in a glass case, lifeless museum artefacts for your shareholders and strangers to gape at?

Love is a being, a light and temperamental thing that is just like that, for as soon as you reach to keep it…bam.

It’s gone.