#oh anakin...

[fuckmyskywalker]

Anakin fucking you at gunpoint, thrusting faster the more he presses the barrel against your skull. He swears he has never been harder in his damn life. His blonde curls tickle your face as he leans closer, whispering and twitching with a devious smirk that you know too well by now. "Do you think I won't fucking kill you?"

[lukeleiahan]

But like, Star Wars Prequels, the Comedy. Padme and Anakin are absolutely convinced they are discreet about their relationship, but in reality literally everyone knows. They're just either too polite, too busy, too confused or not paid enough too bring it up.

- Padme's handmaiden know, this is canon

- Obi-Wan took one look at Padme and Anakin coming to save hin und knew, but promptly decided to deal with that mess when he has the mental capacity to unravel it, so like, never

- Though he is like one night of sex noises away from busting into their bunk and yelling at them everytime Padme is at the war front

- Ashoka was very confused, because her master is kissing the senator, but that's not allowed, is it? The fact that Obi-Wan just takes a deep sip of space whiskey when she brings that up does not help to clear things up

- Eventually she learns to just accept it as an Anakin quirk

- Mace Windu does not get paid enough for any of this

- Especially not for walking in on Skywalker and Amidala getting it on like teenagers

- The clones are not entirely clear in Jedi ettiquette, but Skywalker at least tries to keep them alive, so they're cool. Though they're really not interested in seeing any more of the generals bedroom activities

- Bail Organa has so many bigger problems. So many of them. Though he does occasionally think that if Padme had to have an affair with a Jedi, she could have at least picked Obi-Wan. Much more reepectful and actually charming

- Mon Mothma ist just jealous that Padme gets laid so regularly, Mon herself hasn't seen her partner in ages, this is unfair

- Yoda is leading thousands of Jedi in a war. He does Not Care how Skywalker spends his shore leave and would prefer to know less

- Everyone who ever saw Padme and Anakin interact knows

- Somehow they still think they're discreet

[obiwankenobisuggestion]

Insufferable. Even now, he refuses to listen to me.

[lukeleiahan]

I suddenly remembered that Anakin canonically did not know of Padme's pregnancy until she was what? In the eighth month or something? (The timeline of ROTS is, as many a Star Wars movie timeline, incredibly confusing and frustrating). But the point is, now I have a mighty need for an AU where for some reason the whole save Palpatine mission in the beginning of ROTS was given to other Jedi and Anakin and Obi-Wan don't return to Coruscant until Padme has already had the twins. I mean, think about it!

no Anakin murdering Dooku (not sure what happens to Dooku in this AU, actually, he might have been killed in the fighting by the unspecified other Jedi who had to rescure Palps, or he might still be running around)

it's actually I think Bail Organa who finally organizes for Anakin and Obi-Wan to come home to Coruscant because Bail knows about the secret marriage and he knows about the twins and he is the best friend ever and he can organize things like this without it raising too many questions

(this, among other things, like his ongoing help during the pregnancy and the long friendship he and Padme share, earns him godfather status for Leia)

so, Anakin comes home, and is greeted by Padme similar to canon, only the thing she is about to tell him is not that she's pregnant, it's that he's a father

so, with Bail deliberately distracting Obi-Wan and the other Jedi, she ushers him to their home where Dorme is babysitting and is like.... surprise! Look at out babies!

Anakin has to sit down. Hard. And he is not getting up any time soon. Babies? His babies with Padme?!? This does not compute.

Padme, who has had a whole pregnancy and the, like, two weeks it's been since the birth to get used to this, is giggling, which is not very helpful (Dorme has discreetly left the room and is like, cancelling all Padme's appointments for the day, because she's the best)

eventually, she hands him the on of the babies, and sits down next to him with the other, and for a second that stops him from gaping, and then he looks at them and feels them in the Force and is back to gaping, because oh dear, they are perfect, and they are theirs, and it's very sweet and loving and a very nice family moment

the first day is just spend looking at the twins in wonder

(and Anakin insisting that Padme rest, it's only been two weeks since the birth, he wasn't there to help, pregnancy is dangerous, Force he's worried. She laughs but let's him fuss)

then however they have to start actively thinking about the future

because they love the twins but this was not planned and what are they going to do?

Padme has not announced the birth of the twins yet

Anakin tells her he's going to leave the order. He has something other than the order to live for, now, something more important, and he desperately wants to be a good father

Padme insists that she can't retire, though, because the Republic is on the brink of falling and she needs to stop it

also they're both not sure it is the best idea for Anakin to stop being a general in the war with the way things are going

but Anakin also genuily doesn't want to be away from the twins any second longer than he has to and Padme really likes the idea of him being home more often

eventually they decide to announce the birth of the twins as only Padme's kids, making them Luke and Leia Naberrie Amidala, and to hold of until the end of the war to announce the marriage and Anakin's paternity, but to try and make sure Anakin stays on Coruscant as much as possible

(meanwhile, it's been like two days, and Bail is really wondering how much longer he is capable of holding up the distraction, he's down to small talk here, this is bad)

the dreams about Padme dying in child birth are unsettling, but also obviously untrue, because it happened and Padme is clearly fine, so Anakin has a much easier time ignoring them. Much less grounds for manipulations by Palps due to that and due to Anakin not murdering Dooku

Bail babysits a lot, he's the best at it. The handmaidens, too. Mon is not quite as good as them but she tells them lots about rebublic law until they fall asleep. Obi-Wan gets brought in, too, and doesn't even try to pretend he doesn't know they're Anakin's babies. He glares in Anakin's general direction the whole time. He knows nothing about babies! What if he breaks them? There was a reason behind the code!

The fact that Anakin is the twins father eventually becomes like, this completely open secret in both the order and the senate, but most people are too polite to bring it up, and anyway, there's a war going on, people have bigger problems

(aside from the tabloids. The tabloids have a field day with this)

due to the twins paternity being more or less common knowledge, the Jedi council gets their heads out of their asses long enough to realize that sending Anakin to spy on Palps might be a bad idea

also someone with sense in the council decides that maybe Anakin staying on Coruscant is not that bad an idea (I feel like it was Depa Billaba. She seems sensible. She glares at her old master Mace until he relents and helps her, and that’s how Depa Billaba saves the universe, her padawan Caleb Dume will later insist)

at the same time, Obi-Wan is twitching every time he thinks about it, but he makes a point to stay near Anakin, because, okay, Anakin is an adult and a general and should be old enough to be trusted not to do anything stupid without adult supervision, but he also though Anakin and Padme were old enough not to do things like get secretly married and start a family in the middle of a war, and here they are, so obviously he's going to have to stay here to make sure Anakin doesn't do anything even more stupid

Anakin is happy because all his family is here! Only Ahsoka is missing!

Ahsoka actually comes to Coruscant, too, when she hears about the Amidala twins. She is a bit shocked at first, but makes up for it with lots of snarky commentary and babysitting. She's the absolute best auntie/older sister. Anakin is absolutely delighted

all that extra time with Padme and Bail and their strong political opinions and arguments for democracy, plus the fact that once Palps starts creeping around the twins Anakin actually realizes how creepy it is, combines to an Anakin who does not fall

Palps keeps putting of pulling the trigger on Order 66 because he was hoping for Anakin to be his apprentice by then, damn it, this pregnancy was supposed to be his final piece of seduction, but instead it's bringing Anakin farther and farther away from him?

Problem for him is that now there are Anakin, Obi-Wan and Ahsoka on Coruscant, not distracted by the war that much, deliberately staying on Coruscant but also not that busy when they're not looking after the twins

they look through old files and stumble across the chips

you would not believe their righteous fury

with the help of Padme and Bail and Mon and their allied senators as well as Shaak Ti they quietly deprogram the clones and disable all the chips

then Padme and Bail and Mon use their evidence to dethrone Palps

(it's Padme who calls for the vote of no confidence. It was her who got him the chancellorship through this years before, so it's fitting for her to be the one who takes it away from him now with the very same means)

(Bail is elected chancellor. His first move is to initiate peace talks, and to prepare laws that will prevent future chancellors from amassing power like Palps did)

(Mon more or less accidentally becomes the main spokesperson for clone rights. They all are passionate about the clones being given full rights, but … this woman would lead a terrorist group in another universe. She has a talent for talking to soldiers, even though she does not know why)

peace comes more quickly than anyone anticipated, especially once Dooku flips on Palps and gives a full statement to the senate

Anakin leaves the order before the twins first birthday, and is very happy to be a stay at home dad to the twins and a trophy husband to his awesome senator wife

everyone gets lots of therapy and a happy ending

[lukeleiahan]

And I wonder when we are ever gonna change? Living under the fear, till nothing else remains

[lukeleiahan]

So love has blinded you?

[lukeleiahan]

I saw this and now I can't stop thinking about the Skywalkers as legends, myths, really, because...

Darth Vader the death god, this is perfect. He doesn't set out to create this persona, not really. He doesn't really plan anything that pertains himself anymore, anyway, but... he is the most lethal person in the universe. He kills and tortures and destroys, and he knows no mercy. His black cloak and mask is easily recognizable among the white armor of the Stormtroopers, and they feel safer when he's around. He can't be killed, they say, can't be touched by enemy fire. When you stay close enough to him, they can't reach you, either. He can protect you from cruel and incompetent officers, he can punish them. You can feel his power in your bones, can feel it make you stronger. As long as you follow his orders, you are safe, but nobody can help you if you displease him. He is a god, after all. He does not know mercy.

Padme Amidala is much more of a local myth, really. Both the Rebellion and the Empire try to co-opt her for their own ends, but... she just wasn't that important to the bigger picture, you know? She was a senator during the Clone Wars, and she gave some nice speeches, but soldiers don't really care about senators. She was beautiful and clever, and she is remembered kindly, but the only place where she is really a legend is Naboo. There, she is not a senator, but the queen who freed them, the queen who made peace with the Gungans, the queen who fought. Her picture hangs in almost every house of Naboo, dressed in traditional robes, her make up and hair perfect. She doesn't look like a person, not really, more like an idea. They say that one day, when the time is right, she will return for them, and save Naboo again. She is theirs, after all, their queen. The only one that matters, really.

Luke Skywalker, the boy who blew up the Death Star, a soldier and a trickster and a boy. The first legends start after the battle of Yavin, after he was one of three pilots who survived, after he destroyed the machine of death. He was just a nobody, a nineteen year old farmboy, and yet he was the only one who succeeded. He can't be human, can he? Not really. He must be some sort of demigod, young and reckless but powerful, still. Stormtroopers fear him, because this boy... their blasters bolts don't hit him half as often as they should. Sometimes they do, that's how they know he's not like Vader, who is untouched by violence, but... they know they are good shots. And yet, they can't kill him. And the rebel soldiers know that, too. Nobody tells him that, and his friends don't really believe the legends, because they know him to be an idealist and a dork and the guy who was freezing like hell on Hoth because he's from the desert, but... the rebels who don't know him? He's their myth. And then Bespin happens, and he survives a fight with the god of death himself, actually survives, and how can you not think of him as a demigod, as a spirit, maybe? And they are proud of him, because he's theirs. Stormtroopers though, they are terrified, because they know better than to expect mercy from gods.

Leia Organa, the Last Princess of Alderaan. They don't call her queen until years later, don't really remember that Winter exists, either. She's a symbol, more so than she is ever a person, because Leia herself, Leia the person, she's on the edge of breaking, she's full of hate and grief and despair, and that's not inspirational, is it? So she lets them believe it. But there are legends about her, legends about her standing and seeing her planet be destroyed, of her surviving, still and beautiful as a statue, but alive, powerful. The Princess most of the rebels know wears white, long, beautiful gowns, her hair in complicated braids. She speaks loudly, with a clear, strong voice. She stands, despite everything. She stands. And she survives. Soon, there are rumors. She can't be killed, they say. She was a prisoner aboard the death star, she saw the destruction of her home planet, and yet, she lives, yet, she fights. If she's not dead yet, can the Empire even touch her? Can she even bleed? Or is she made of ice? Or is it fire? For Leia Organa is a myth of duality. The white princess made of ice, and the passionate fighter with fire in her veins, a blaster always at hand and the best at inspiring troops before a desperate battle. Ice and Fire, that's what Leia Organa is made of, not flesh and blood. She's the only one who sort of realizes the myth that's grown around her, and she uses it, sometimes. Not too much, because she can't control it, but sometimes.

Just... the Skywalkers as terrifying legends.