𝕋𝕙𝕖 ℝ𝕚𝕥𝕦𝕒𝕝
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When I begin to perform The Ritual I was fueled by desperation
I had no one to turn to
No one who would or could, help me...
I was also so unsure of how to go about performing the ritual as the book (while expounding heavily upon what to expect with success) was not as detailed in describing the catalyst steps.
I understood that I needed to perform The Ritual consistently for at least 1 entire moon cycle (which is 28 days) but since it wasn't exactly specific I decided 30 days would be better.
I built the altar described; a flattened mound of thick clay mixed with crushed shells and powdered mushrooms, nestled at the foot of a tree as per the instructions.
I understood that "trade offerings" needed to be presented every night upon the altar, clippings of my hair or nails were acceptable as well as my spit, urine or blood.
The importance of the offerings was greatly expounded upon, stressed that the success of The Ritual hinged upon the faithful placement of them nightly, and fresh. Nothing earlier gathered and stored or substitutions of any kind were considered acceptable.
At first it was awkward, kneeling at the altar in the dark of night, calling upon the full name of the entity described in the book and making my offering of spit.
Along with the "trade offerings" were suggestions for "tribute offerings" which would add to the enticement of the entity and boost the speed of success for The Ritual.
As beeswax was considered an acceptable "tribute offering" I sat one night in the flickering light of a small beeswax candle I had made myself and clipped my nails, adding them into the dense clay which was staying moist and pliable without being unstable.
Adding a dried gourd to the altar as a "tribute" made a simple container of just the right shape and depth to hold an offering of urine which seemed to evaporate with unusual quickness.
I was able to cut a long lock of my hair to tie around the base of the altar, my hair was definitely thicker and fuller lately, even growing quicker.
When my menstrual cycle began during my 30 day journey through The Ritual it seemed fitting to empty my moon cup onto the altar.
The night after I did so the altar was covered in worms, this was described in the book as a powerful omen that I had activated the altar successfully and now the attention of the entity was upon me.
I intoned their name again and again and offered my blood upon the dark, black, rich loam which was now beginning to sprout tiny mushrooms amongst the writhing night crawlers.
From that point onward a sweet floral scent surrounded me day and night wherever I went.
My menstrual cycle was over but I still had days left to finish The Ritual. There was one other acceptable "trade offering" I had not yet placed upon the altar, described by the book as "the nectar of ecstasy"
I had already woven a crude mat of raffia, as plant fibers were considered acceptable "tribute" to the altar.
Lying on the mat and feeling the cool earth beneath me, the night air sweet with the heavy aroma of a thousand invisible flowers, the long thick locs of my hair cradled my head and caressed my back and shoulders as I called upon the entity. softly at first, in a shy whisper but as I focused on my body and the feelings of pleasure I heard my own voice rising in volume and almost beyond my control as I reached my climax I screamed out!
Felt something loose in my mouth and I coughed, the molar in the back that had a cavity I was unable to treat lay in my palm and my tongue explored the vacant spot to find the sharp ridges of another tooth growing up within the space. An in-depth examination the next day confirmed the impossible truth.
I ground the tooth to fine powder and sprinkled it upon the altar
"Blood of my blood, bone of my bone and flesh...
"...ó̷͞f̛͖̘͗ ̡ͮm̴̫̀y̶̯̱҉ ̢͘͜͝f̺̥҉̢̛͏ḽ̟e̢̙̥͘͟s͖̠̀̀h̫̤͑҉̛ ̢̊͏̨"
They had answered me, the entity described in the book, with a voice like water rippling through willow leaves, with a sound like whispers in the shallows left by low tide.
I was shaking, darkness clouded my vision as They embraced me with a thousand thousand touches light as spider silk and tight as coiled serpents. My body was simultaneously pierced at every nerve and awakened to an intensity of perception I had no words for. My mind reeled from the wave of information as I was plunged into my own systems in a feedback loop that grew deeper endlessly deeper rushing understanding of every cell and microbiota that was housed within me and in turn became the house for which I could realize myself!
From the many... One
And I awoke from what felt like a trillion lifetimes, lifetimes lived to give me life.
I knew that now I had within me the abilities to help myself.
And I looked upon the world...
With new power