#oracle stuff

[maceofpentacles]

my tarot/oracle deck icks:

- overly feminine/“divine feminine” themes

- decks that use the g slur for the ~aesthetic~

- decks that appropriate chakras, kabbalah, indigenous symbols, etc.

- any deck that has “sexual” in the title ((or just decks that are sex themed lol))

- not the biggest fan of decks that are gilded?? it hurts my hands when i shuffle idk

- pip decks ((decks that don’t have actual art for the minor arcana))

- ANY DECK THAT INCLUDES LILITH AS A GODDESS

feel free to add on with your icks bc i’m curious

[nei-ning]

I’ve been feeling so damn tired today. I’ve been awake only about 3 hours and I still could go back to sleep. I also had so freaking hard headache when I woke up, having sore neck and shoulders too - even that I haven’t done anything to make them be hurt.

Well, now I asked from my Archangel Michael deck why I do feel this tired. I got cards: “Let go of fear... Now” and “You’re on the right path.”

I instantly remembered the dream what I had last night. At first, in the dream, I got lost in this HUGE HUGE mall! I honestly entered one small store in it and I just couldn’t find my way out even that I was sure the door was behind me, but it was not there when I went back! On top of it I lost my sis in the mall too!

Then next I was in front of small old church in the middle of forest / forest area. There was 3 or 4 dark skinned women, all half naked (naked upper body) and there was small group of white skinned people. They were racists and didn’t like these women who, honestly, were harmless but apparently they had magical powers. These women came in front of the group, stating they survived. White people had set them a trap which should had killed them (like a car accident), but they came back without any injuries.

One of the racist’s said; “I knew you would come back. That’s why we are prepared.” and behind those dark skinned women flied big hooks which had 4 smaller “hooks” on them. They pierced every dark skinned woman’s left chest, but they didn’t die. They didn’t even bleed much. One of these women said something as she started to remove the hook, others following her example. However, this group of racists were not happy so they attacked on the women, starting to stab, kick, beat etc. them with anything and everything they could. They wanted them dead - even that they were either hard to kill or immortal.

I woke up and now, as I watch my cards, I know they are connected to my dream. But I don’t understand fully how. I am not racist since people’s skin color means nothing to me. All what I care about is their nature, how they truly are. Are they kind or complete jerks. But one thing, what keeps coming in my mind as I look at the “Fear” card is that maybe, in some level, I fear that my feminine side is being attacked either by outsiders or myself.

But then there’s this “you’re on the right path” card. I know I am going through a healing period emotionally, mentally and spiritually so the dream, with the fear card, can be connected to it.

So, I asked more help / advice from Michael and I got “Sense of Humor” card. I think I need to bring more humor back into my life. After all I keep getting, from other people’s readings, that I should be more child-like, be more playful and let my inner child bloom. I need to start to laugh and enjoy more.

Now, I decided to ask some filling advice from my “Work Your Light” deck and I got: “ Answer the Call” and “Share Your Voice.” In other words, I need to REALLY listen and follow my soul’s calling, answering to it. Doing what it asks me to do. But then I didn’t understand why the voice card is there. I know it’s about singing and talking etc. so I asked more help to it. I got: “Star Mother. How can you Mother yourself?” ... I keep getting this card a lot and it made me laugh. It’s connected to the voice and to how I’m talking to myself. I need to learn to talk to myself like a mother who talks ever so lovingly to her child. With pure love. Nothing more, nothing less.

It all starts to make so much sense now that I can’t help but to feel so happy and laugh! Thank you, cards! I love you and I am grateful for your help <3

[nei-ning]

Watching Nuke’s Top 5 videos on Youtube with sis and, damn, there’s so many amazing ghost / spirits / demons etc. videos! OuO Some of the things in those videos are clearly fakes (can sense if it’s spirit being or not) but like 99% of them are real - and super amazing! And trust me, there’s been A LOT of stuff / beings which has make me have strong chills / goose bumps all around my body, senses instantly screaming; “Oooh, no. Hell no! I wouldn’t go there! That doesn’t feel good at all!”

But still the best ones, what I personally have loved so far, has been a video about woman’s face changing and turning into long and unnatural ugly smirk while her nose and face changes otherwise, her eyes starting to glow in the dark. She was with a team investigating “the cage” called building in UK’s Essex where, in the past, has been held witches. Probably even tortured and killed them. That is seriously THE BEST thing what I have seen! Even one investigator saw her face changing, saying she doesn’t look like a person and that her face changed. She was taken off from the group for safety reasons. She later said after that happening she had suffer from nightmares a long time. That spirit, which caused her face to change, attached itself on her, causing the nightmares. I truly hope she got rid of it!

Then second one was about a man and woman investigating small boat house  building. Man instantly said he feels super sick, heavy negativity and that he just NEEDS to leave. Woman was surprised since she felt fine so she continued with the investigation while man left. She asked questions and received answers from few spirits who, obviously, were men. They said to each other; “What?” “Look, there’s a lady.” “Yeah.” “Yeah.” YEAH.” So in other words those men spirits didn’t like the real man, causing him to feel sick and making him flee, but they were happy and excited to see a woman, not causing anything bad on her. And the fact they called her “lady” shows HUGE respect! They had manners when it came to her :) I find it sweet and also hilarious since they sounded so happy and excited about her. Some male spirits, honestly, do prefer female investigators / company much more better than men. For example those male spirits talked so nasty and rude way to that man investigator, asking him does he want to die, calling him fucking ass etc.

Anyway so many super amazing videos! I’m so happy about the channel! 8D But I MUST say a word - DO NOT go watch the videos if you are even slightly sensitive person / get easily nightmares etc.! Some of those videos ARE NOT FOR YOU! I don’t want you to go watch them and have nightmares, fears, traumas etc.! So for your own safety, DON’T watch them! I say this also as a medium / oracle who can sense and see things herself.

[nei-ning]

After 3 days it’s finally finished! A moment from my meditation from few days ago. Leonardo was my guide during that meditation and he took me to ancient China to show me 2 of my lives in there. More closer to an end of meditation he sat there smiling on the rock (pic) as I gazed down in tiny village where I had lived those lives.

Colored, at least partly, with the help of @msobscure‘s tutorial :)

[nei-ning]

Full moon meditation of mine is now done. Once again it was such wonderful experience and so sad in someway as well. Native American Indians music always has had huge spot in my heart & soul. It’s so familiar, so peaceful, gentle yet strong and in perfect harmony with nature and animals kind of music. I don’t know how to describe it exactly but it means so, so much to me.

During my meditation I felt I was young man in American Indian village. I loved to stay on guard and patrol outside the village during nights. I was such night owl back then already. I used to sit on the hill and look at the full moon on clear sky with stars, hear owls and coyotes / wolves howling. It calmed me greatly, making feel peace and harmony with everything around me. When I had grown older I married very pretty woman and we had a child. My wife had been there by my side when my time to leave had come. Our child had grew older too but apparently had died around in the age of 20-25 on snake’s venom / bite. When I too had been around 30 I had lots of anger in me towards white people who came to take over our lands, forcing us to move (but now afterwards I understand it was a good thing in the end since we ended up having our village in much more prettier place near the cliffs / mountain and one bigger canyon.) During my meditation this older chubby man, shaman perhaps or my grandpa, took me to stand at the edge of the canyon. He took his flute and started to play, music instantly traveling in canyon with the wind. This moment made me cry so much. It was, and still is, somehow too much in positive and nostalgic way. He told me, via his thoughts, this is what we always had been doing when someone in the village died ever since we arrived to that place. We believed a soul went in the canyon to fly with the wind and our music, with wind, would help the soul come out there and become one with Earth, with all of us. Otherwise soul would had stay stuck there with the wind forever. Familiar music helped it to move out. He then took me in the village at night, making me sit near this huge and nice fire where everyone had gather (15 people at max). One of then started to play flute and one drum. Music, night, nature, wind, fire, these people… Everything in this moment felt way too real, way too nostalgic and I just started to cry so hard for real. I felt my tears and they were burning hot! I never haven’t had such hot tears in my life but I welcomed them - for many minutes. This old man, who was with me at the canyon, was sitting next to me wrapping his arm over my shoulders hugging me. I kept whispering I want to come home, I want to come to them and he smiled saying; “Someday you will be able to come here and meet us. We will welcome you with open arms.” I kept telling him I want to come home and he said; “I know but you must go now.” And I begged him to let me be there a little while longer, and he did until I really had to stop. Damn, that still makes me cry so much. I always, as long as I can remember, have been wanting to go and meet American Native Indians in their native living areas. Spend time there, talk with them, learn from them. Everything. I really, really wish someday, in this life / in the future, I will be able to go meet them for real.

[nei-ning]

If you like to meditate, tonight will be one of the most perfect nights to it! Full moon and the end of Mercury’s retrograde (<- Causes old shit to come up, all electricity hasn’t work nor any communication like it should etc.)

I meditated with last full moon with this music and I felt so super wonderful afterwards! Tho it was a bit too short in my liking since my meditation usually lasts 20-30 min so I think I’ll look for longer music this time (I’m just so damn picky even about meditation music.)

[nei-ning]

No. No. Shadow people are not bad. Actually usually the most bad spirits / beings are souls who have not cross over because they are angry, want revenge, are bitter, want justice etc. so they are, kind of, stuck between two worlds; Physical World and Spirit World since they haven’t go into the light. I’m not saying there isn’t bad / negative beings since there is but to me they are much more rare than negative and angry souls (and also nasty souls who likes to scare people and play pranks on them because scaring them is a.) fun to them and b.) they get more powerful since peoples fear feeds them.)

[nei-ning]

That’s one of the ways to meditate, but I never focus on my breathing during meditation. To me focusing on my breathing is a great disturb. Instead I do make sure my breathing is nice and calm but then I focus on visualizing things in my mind, which later turns right in front of my eyes like I’m really into that happening, place etc. After the visualizing turns strong enough my mind just “drifts off”. I see, hear and feel loud and clear while having conversation with the being whoever is with me (usually it’s my Spirit Guide Master or one of my favorite fictional characters since, to me, they are our teachers as well) while they show me around, either just having random chat or showing me things from my previous lives etc. I always allow them to lead since they know what, currently, is the best for me.

But everyone has their own way of doing this! There’s no right or wrong way to meditate :) As long as you remember to do protections and ground yourself (), asking and allowing beings only from unconditional love and source’s light to come to you, you’re doing fine and well.

How to do protection? - Imagine yourself in white-gold energy / light ball. You also can imagine Archangel Michael’s blue cape with hood on you. How to do grounding? - Imagine roots coming out of your feet, going deep in the ground or sinking your feet all the way to ankles in soil.

PS: Forgot to mention I always, always, always use music when I meditate. I just CAN’T meditate without meditation music and it has to be and feel RIGHT so not any kind of meditation music fits me.