#pan problems

[galaxyedging]

I always thought Gabriel Luna was attractive but I just needed one last piece to fully cement my attraction. I think the Tommy Miller that we're getting is going to do that.

[zuckarr]

A psychologist asked me how I realized my 'homosexuality' (wrong - I'm pansexual, but she doesn't even know that word) expecting me to tell the story of Big Gay Moment when everything suddenly made sense, but all I said was "I don't care about the gender of others, I'm attracted to personalities and minds, not genitals" and she looked so disappointed lol

[quill-and-chalk]

Panphobes: Your Transphobic and Biphobic cause of your identity.

Me: Actually, I am nonbinary.

Panphobes: Well, you are still biphobic cause you don't believe bi people can date nonbinary people.

Me: Actually my girlfriend is bi, and I clearly think she is able to date nonbinary people.

Panphobes: Well you’re.... you’re...... *sweats nervously*

[joey-the-chaos-gremlin]

Here, take a meme. You deserve it.

You have been blessed today.

[kiame-sama]

Listen up, Lovies! I'm gonna tell you about my best friend!

My best friend and I look very similar to one another. She is Hispanic and I am (mostly) Spanish. We are both on the shorter side of life- I'm 5ft she's 5ft 3in- have thick curly hair, a chubbier yet oddly a figure 8 style figure, and rock close to the same prescription in glasses. We are both extreme introverts yet we ironically become extroverts when our powers combine. On top of this, we both have terrible directional sense and can get lost in a crowd, so with our combined anxiety we often hold hands so we don't lose each other.

We are platonic soulmates.

Before Covid-19 we would often go out to movies and dinner together, and as two female-presenting and identifying humans, we were well aware that our chaotic dumb-ass energy made us the most confusing couple for waitresses/waiters. We are also acutely aware that when we have only one bill, afore mentioned waiting staff would place the bill in front of whichever of us has the strongest top energy. Ironically, we are both primarily bottoms with a bit of switch in us and we are both pansexual/panromantic.

Sometimes we would get super chill waiters and sometimes we would get homophobic waiters. We LOVE to screw around depending on which kind we get and we get some of the best comments as a result. These comments are either said directly to us or we get little written notes on receipts.

"You two are so cute!"

"I don't care what anyone says, you two are pretty great."

"Thanks for the great time!"

"You two are so nice! :)"

"I appreciate you two"

"Don't let anyone tell you that you can't be together."

"Why are you like this?"

"Do you have to hold hands in public?"

Sometimes they would flat-out refuse to wait on us and we'd get a new waiter/waitress. Usually we get super chill staff and occasionally get repeats because we tend to tip well.

Usually I am the one that the bill is set in front of and I definitely get quite some pride from it, but occasionally some staff have set it in the middle of the table to see who goes for it first. Times that this happens are usually when we haven't yet agreed who is paying for dinner that evening and have both reached for it at the same time. We don't really argue, but we will have one hell of a stare down while insisting we both want to pay the bill. Most staff watch in utter fascination as we go back and forth before deciding who wins the nice game and pays. More often than not, when it resolves the staff member who has been waiting on us takes a big ol' sigh of relief as if she and I were having a boxing match. We find this hilarious.

Sometimes people will randomly buy us drinks, appetizers, or dessert. Sometimes the staff take something off of our bill. Some families glare at us and we glare right back. Some people make stupid comments and we act even more rowdy. Sometimes kids would wander up and ask us strange questions while their parent desperately tries to stop the child from bothering us or encourages the child to come up and talk to us.

We would also take trips to the nearby Walmart together and many staff members there would comment on us to us or ask about the other when we are alone. I have been asked where my adorable girlfriend is many a time and she has been asked the same. We have been heckled and cat-called as well as having random people tell us to 'keep fighting the good fight'.

We went to the same small middle school and high school together (about 100 students in each grade, maybe less) and most people figured she and I were dating. Some of our teachers would honestly be floored to find out we were in fact, not dating. Some of our teachers thought we were siblings despite having different last names. This would cause many heated discussions in the teacher's-lounges between those who thought we were siblings and those who thought we were dating.

We would take naps together wherever with the idea of being mutual pillows for one another. We were the artsy kids in a school primarily focused on STEM (no music class, no gym class, no art class).

When all this Covid trash is over, we will go straight back to being chaotic dumb-asses that share one brain cell confusing staff and others alike with our super chill platonic soulmate energy.

Our many misadventures shall rise again.

[beeesworld]

Callie: Are you ready to talk now?

Arizona, exhales deeply: I want to say some not nice things, and I want you to listen without saying that our relationship is over or walking out.

Callie: Okay.

Arizona: I'm mad that you slept with someone else. And I know that we were broken up, but still, you slept with someone else. And I'm even madder that that person had a penis. And I know that you're bisexual, I know that--

[hybrid-hunny13]

What I would do to be in between the two of them just once 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

Mazikeen and Lucifer like fuuuuuck

[that-loud-femme]

Before y'all grab my neck or put guns against my head here's something all people need to know:

What pansexuality is NOT:

Attraction to men, women and trans people.

Why: Because trans binary people are men and women. Trans women are women and trans men are men, and this definition is inherently transphobic.

Attraction to men, women and non binary people/attraction to all genders.

Why: Because this definition implies that bi people aren't attracted to enbies or that bi people can't be attracted to people of all genders. Bisexuality was always inclusive non binary people.

Attraction on the basis of personality.

Why: Because this supports the stereotype that people with other sexualities (especially bi people) are promiscuous and would sleep with anyone, or that they don't care about personality.

Being genderblind.

Why: While many pansexuals are genderblind, being genderblind isn't a defining factor of pansexuality, and being genderblind is definitely not restricted to pansexuals.

Not having a preference.

Why: Because this encourages the view that bi people are greedy or picky and romanticizes pansexuals for not having a preference, when actually, many pansexuals do have preferences or lean towards one gender more than others. And that's very much valid.

"Hearts not parts".

Firstly, this was coined by bi people against the myth that they're promiscuous and would sleep with anyone. Secondly, the phrase itself implies that people of other sexualities do not care about "hearts".

What Pansexuality is:

Gender not playing a role in attraction to all genders/ any gender.

Why: Because pansexuality was always defined as "attraction regardless of gender". This is what it always meant. All other definitions are interpretations of this particular definition. This is the simplest way of putting it and the one way which shouldn't offend anyone.

I'm tired of people spreading misinformation about pansexuals, and I'm also tired of people being negative to pan people on the basis of said misinformation. What kind of community are we if we keep invalidating and hating each other? We're a community for a reason and we aren't meant to be fighting with each other. We were meant to fight for/alongside each other. ♡

Please spread the right information instead of making assumptions or random interpretations and fighting over them. Peace. Love and Power to all bi, pan and m-spec people. ♡

PS: I'm sorry for trying to define pansexuality when this should have clearly been written by a pansexual person, but someone had to say this. Sincere apologies.