Hello, I have a couple problems and questions can I put it in one post. Tag- minalily. 1. I am a demigirl sex female but I am not allowed to dressed manly or got to the men's section(My parents. I know like clothes don't need to be gendered. But after coming out some I feel more dysphoric. I wanna wear a binder and wear some male clothes once in a while. What should I do? Should I try to buy them secretly on the internet and act like there for girls. Its driving me crazy. I feel like it might l
Minaily-I think it would make be feel less dysphoric. I also have depressionand anxiety keep forgetting to eat and drink. What should I do toremember. I know this is a long list of things but the government hastold me I have a ld but my therapist thinks it might be caused by mymental illness so maybe it can be fixed? Through therapy. Anyway, Ikeep looking up how to love yourself with a learning disability. andtheirs not a single article… should I make one for others to add orwill that
Minaily-Should I make one or will it be offensive and bad. Since I don’t knowif this can be fixed or not and I am not the best voice.
Justto be clear, it seems like the problem you’re having is that you’renot allowed to wear men’s clothes, but that you feel like doing sowould help address your dysphoria. You also feel like the governmentmandate for an ID, in which there are only two genders (male orfemale) and that is adding to your dysphoria.
Myquestion is, why do you feel like you’re not allowed to wear manlyclothes? Do your parents require you to wear female clothes? Do theyobject if you wear a t-shirt and jeans? Those clothes aren’t genderedat all, plenty of girls wear t-shirt and jeans and those aren’tconsidered manly. Do you know how your parents would react to that?If you think they would object to it, you can tell them that severalgirls wear t-shirt and jeans. If your mom wears them, you can evenpoint that out as your defense.
Mostof the time, if you’re wearing a binder, people won’t notice thatyou’re wearing one. I’ve worn a binder around several people, andthey haven’t commented on it. They haven’t even commented on the factthat I look thinner or that I look different. Also, a binder lookslike a type of sports bra, or a tank top depending on what kind youget, so unless your parents know what a binder looks like, you shouldbe able to get one without them knowing. If you’re worried about themseeing it when you need it washed, binders actually have to be handwashed, so I wouldn’t worry about that.
Isthere somewhere you could store a binder where your parents won’tfind it? If so, I think you could get one without them knowing orputting up a fuss about it.
Ifyou’re worried about them telling you that you can’t wear manlyclothes, what you can do is slowly work towards wearing moremasculine clothes. If you were to start wearing them right away, yourparents would probably notice and start complaining about it.However, if you were to do it more gradually, it would seem like yourstyle was slowly changing instead of something you were activelytrying to do. The best way to do that is to get one item at a timeand incorporate it into what you already wear. Once you’ve worn itregularly for a few months, you can get another one. I know it takestime, and it doesn’t do much to address your dysphoria, but it is away to start wearing clothes that feel more like you without gettingin trouble from your parents.
Asfar as dysphoria, I would recommend looking for other results to dealwith it when you aren’t able to transition or present yourself in away that feels more accurate to who you are. There are severaltumblrs out there dedicated to helping people work through dysphoria.A great place to start is this dysphoriamasterpost on Transgender Teen Survival Guide.
Makingan article about how to love yourself with a learning disabilitywould be a great idea! I don’t think it would be offensive,especially if you state that this is your opinion and should not betaken as fact. I think it could also help if you wrote it withsomeone else in your same situation, so that the article would notjust be from your perspective.
Ihope all of this helps you, and please don’t hesitate to reach out ifyou need anymore help!
