#penposts

[wanderingpen]

Belos really said the possession itself wasn't enough, he needs to give each of his victims a MULLET

[wanderingpen]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

When a supernatural headache leads to a very human former Distortion on the front porch, Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood decide to give the confused Michael Shelley a chance, allowing him to stay in their safehouse until they can figure out what to do with him. Michael gives being human again his best shot, despite the lingering effects of the Spiral.

[wanderingpen]

I'm blatantly getting inspired to post this by @kuniidealz 's post about Michael using a cane post-distortion (in an AU where he makes it out after being Helenized) so I hope that's alright.

I headcanon that Michael always had small issues with his body, mild chronic pain, hearing things that weren't there, etc. Because he's been marked by the spiral since he was a kid. One of the side effects of this was that Michael was always just sick enough/in enough pain to feel it but never enough to get a diagnosis or anything because our medical system sucks and the way doctors dismiss people is such a gaslighty, spiral vibe.

So his legs always hurt when he stood too long, his fingers cracked and bent in odd ways, he was a bit too flexible, but no one ever took it seriously, so early on he decided to hide it away, keeping his pain under wraps as much as he could.

Until he was spat out from the spiral, and then the pain tripled, no longer dampened by the spiral's intent to keep him feel like he was going crazy. Combined with becoming human again after literally being nonexistent and real at the same time, it all crashes down on him.

His legs give out on him occasionally, his joints ache and his muscles burn, and he feels like he's going crazy in a different way. I also think that he'd constantly be dizzy, maybe dealing with extreme vertigo after being literally the spiral. He knocks into things and grabs various surfaces in order to keep standing upright.

I feel like he wouldn't "admit" it until someone else brings it up. Maybe Jon, ever observant from being...yknow...the eyeball man, and also someone who ALSO canonically deals with chronic pain. Maybe he understands not wanting to make pain a big deal, so he discreetly orders a cane that's adjustable and leaves it in the places Michael frequents in the archives. (because Michael is still technically tied to the institute, right?)

When Michael finally admits it and opens up about how much pain he's in, they talk about aids. The institute's budget finally gets put to some good use when Jon orders a body braid to keep Michael's distorted limbs and muscles from giving out. A wheelchair sits in the breakroom for those days when Michael hurts too badly to walk with his cane.

And maybe one day Michael breaks down, hating the truth but knowing it's almost a relief to hurt. Because when it hurts badly enough, he doesn't feel like he's making it up. When he hurts badly enough, it feels real. In a fucked up way, it assures him that he is, in fact, Michael. Human.

[wanderingpen]

The way that Cybertronians move is very important to me.

Doorwings and antennae and little bits of kibble moving around to express their emotions make me so happy. Humans don't really have anything like that, so it's almost animalistic, but in the best way. It's almost like they don't realize they're doing it sometimes.

Of course, some shows don't do it very much, but when they do!!! It makes me very happy.

Look at his doorwings!! They're going down! They're expressing his emotions!

Shockwave is supposed to be an emotionless, logical bot, but look at his little antennae!! They're going up and down!! He's feeling things!! He's alert!!

He's angry!! I love watching Prime!Starscream especially because he uses his wings to make himself look bigger sometimes, and he's so expressive with them!!

Optics!! My favorite example is Orion Pax, but the animators for Prime managed to make everyone's optics so expressive instead of just glowing lights. (Which is also fine and I love those too, but looking at Prime optics does something to me)

You can see the machinery moving!! You can tell it's one big ball behind the soft metal!! It gets smaller without Orion realizing like how our eyes get smaller in light!! But it's an emotional response instead!! And Optimus rarely lets his optics do this, so??? Is it something they can control??? Their optics??? Who knows but it looks cool!

In conclusion:

[wanderingpen]

ALADOR HAS HIS KID'S SYMBOLS ON HIS BELT I'M GOING TO CRY

[wanderingpen]

The most devastating, heart-wrenching scenes in campaign three happen, I'm sobbing, everyone's a mess, Laudna's dead and then-

"Hey critters! Laura Baily here to show you what's new-"

[wanderingpen]

Thinking about how much the Owl House means to me and people all over the world.

Thinking about how much Luz Noceda means to all of the neurodivergent kids out there. The ones who are bullied and think they're weird and out of place because they think a little differently. Thinking about how she is always herself, and it has a positive impact on everyone around her. Thinking about how she's dorky and geeky and neurodivergent and perfect. Thinking about how she is so true to herself and to her family and they love her because she is LUZ and no one else is Luz. Thinking about all of the children of color who get to see themselves on the screen fighting bad guys and being amazing and never being ashamed of their skin or culture. Thinking about how everything she is stems from herself and her amazing latina, single, neurodivergent mother. Thinking about how she is bisexual and gets a girlfriend and is happy with said girlfriend for years to come. Thinking about all of the queer kids who get to see two girls kiss and love each other and be dorks together like kids should be able to.

Thinking about how much Hunter means to kids who are abused and hurt and scared. Thinking about how he had a happy ending, thinking about how he's healing even after years of abuse and neglect. Thinking about how he shows people that you can heal, that you don't have to continue the cycle, that you are NOT just your DNA. Thinking about how he loses a friend and grieves and hurts but he's okay in the end. Thinking about how he doesn't fit into the nuclear family idea, thinking about how he has so many parental figures and siblings and friends and he doesn't have to be "Hunter Noceda" or "Hunter Deamonne" or "Hunter Clawethorne" because he is all of them. Thinking about how found family is just as important as blood family, and thinking about how you don't have to put a name to something to know it's there.

Thinking about Eda, and how she is a disabled character who stays disabled even in a world full of magic. Thinking about how she embraces her disability and she's never put down for it within her family, and she's just as amazing and badass as any other character. Thinking about how she's queer and sassy and disabled and hot and perfect and she never lets anything stand in her way. Thinking about how she loves her kids and loves her partner and loves life.

Thinking about how much Raine Whispers means to me as someone who is figuring out their gender identity. Thinking about how they are the person that helped me figure out that I am nonbinary (at least to some extent) and thinking about all of the other nonbinary kids who get to see themselves on screen in a fantastic show as an important character who isn't shown of as the "queer quota" character and then pushed aside. Thinking about how they are nervous and shy and talented and brave and a monsterfucker in love and them being nonbinary is just a part of a whole amazing character. Thinking about how they're middle-aged, showing kids and adults that being queer doesn't disappear when you age. Queer people get to live a full, happy life just like everyone else.

Thinking about Lilith and Gus, and how they're obsessed with things that some people consider "strange", and how no one that loves them ever puts them down for it. Thinking about how Gus is a gifted child, who deals with gifted kid burnout and the others give him the space and kindness to help him deal with that. Thinking about how Lilith makes mistakes, like everyone does, but finds happiness in her sister and in her friends and is forgiven because she never meant to hurt anybody. Thinking about how she doesn't need a love interest to be "whole", and that she finds complete fulfillment in her platonic and familial relationships.

Thinking about Belos, and how they really said no, some people do not deserve your forgiveness. No, sometimes people just hurt others for the sake of hurting them, and you do not have to forgive them just because they apologize. Thinking about how he is not even given the honor of a dignified death, thinking about how he is purely fascist and no one ever tries to humor him or give him another chance.

Thinking about the Collector, and how they just didn't understand. Thinking about how they were scared and hurt and traumatized, and all they needed was someone to help them understand the world around them. Thinking about how, while the show didn't forgive Philip, they did forgive the Collector. Because some people really don't intend to hurt others, even if they accidently do. Thinking about how the Collector decided to put space between himself and the people they hurt, to give everyone the chance to heal and how they still visit because he has friends to turn to now, because even if you accidentally hurt people, there will be those who forgive you. Thinking about how they show that you are loved, even if you make a mistake.

Thinking about how Amity and her siblings learned to be better and escaped their Mother's horrible treatment. Thinking about how Amity didn't immediately forgive her father for being idle in their treatment, but also thinking about how Alador is genuinely TRYING and she is willing to give him a chance. Thinking about how she recognizes that she hurt people and tries so hard to make amends, and thinking about how people are slow to trust her again but she finds people that eventually DO, and thinking about how she loves her human girlfriend and thinking about how she's grown and matured and become her own person outside of her mother's influence.

Thinking about King, about how he loves and misses the father he never got to meet, but that he also loves his mother for adopting him and taking care of him. Thinking about how King shows that you can love both your blood and your adoptive relationships and that just because you have one doesn't mean you can't have the other. Thinking about how he loves his sibling and teases her and fights with his family like families do, but they forgive each other in the end because no one ever really meant it.

Thinking about Willow, and her strength and boundless support for her friends, but also how she isn't an infinite well of hope. Sometimes she needs help too, and that's okay. Thinking about how she is chubby and badass and strong and about how she has a boy head-over-heels for her because she is so loveable and so amazing.

Thinking about how everyone is allowed to make mistakes, allowed to hurt and cry, allowed to be different and be queer and be neurodiverse. Thinking about how much these characters mean to kids around the world, and thinking about how much love and effort the cast and crew put into letting their little world touch so many people's hearts.

Thank you to Dana and the rest of the crew. Thank you for showing kids and adults alike that there are people like them out there and that love and hope is not lost on anyone. Thank you for inviting us into the carnival and taking us on the most amazing, magical ride we have ever been on.

The Owl House will live in my heart, and in the hearts of many for years to come.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Bye-eeeee!!!

[wanderingpen]

Okay but can we talk about how there was obviously SOME Clawthorne influence on the Grimwalkers?

Specifically these two, at least going off of the hair. They have that Clawthorne-PoofTM, a trait that neither Belos nor Caleb seemed to have. Hunter doesn't seem to have it either, so it was probably something that Belos 'fixed' along the way, but I wonder why some of the Grimwalkers would have that in the first place?

Obviously we know that Caleb was in love with Evelyn, who is almost 100 percent confirmed to be a Clawthorne, but why would she have any influence on how the Grimwalkers came out? Belos used Caleb's ortet as the core of each Grimwalker, but I wonder if he had to use something of Evelyn's too? Or maybe some of them came out more like Caleb's theoretical children than clones, children he would have had with Evelyn?

It's already been discussed how the magical process gave the Grimwalkers certain distinctly witch-like features, like the pink eyes and pointed ears, but I wonder if there was more to it than that? I wonder if Belos's creations were unintentionally influenced by the very witch that Belos despised possibly the most?

It was just interesting seeing a very Eda-like silhouette for some of the Grimwalkers.