in addition to Jasmines camping list
v Jasmines mom thinking that Julian was like Ireland
v Jasmines mom thinking elves were the same as hobbits were the same as leprechauns
v Our little pow-wow circle waiting for Julians car to get there because he was delayed buying rope that we ended up not even using
v throwing a chip 1 ft away from me in an attempt to lure the flies away
v the start of the pee butt jokes
v my dad: “you guys better not have any beer” darrin: “oh i thought you said beard”
v lying in the tent first thing/being called boring with ian
v feeling calm for the first time in weeks lying in the tent
v the overwhelming smell of weed in the other campsite
v taking two hits and then passing out in a daze in the tent and missing the hiking trip
v the 15 minutes i got to relax in the tent with ian before lena came over high out of her mind
v me giving lena juice and her not remembering then chanting “JUICE” impatiently
v making sandwiches like an expert chef for ian and very very high lena
v being very very high and also confused that no one else felt very very high
v periodically looking over at ian to find hes in a more ridiculous position than before (took his shirt off and put it over his head like a pharaoh and holding a pink umbrella)
v seven man pee trip feat. high lena and bambi
v walking everywhere in sandals bc i forgot my fuckin shoes
v distributing stickers that were really cute/had nsfw shrekxbane on them
v having my first drink poured by jake, a pineapple peach mix thingy
v feeling it hit me after the second drink, when i looked up at yazmin and tried to stand up and immediately felt the world spinning
v ian telling me to pace my drinking, but later regretting waiting so long for my next drink
v the sweet sweet taste of the many delicious flavors of smirnoff ices
v those tasted so fucking good
v smoking a cigar with Julian an trying to tell people how not to choke and die.
v motherfucking green apple flavor is my shit
v hoarding the green apple flavor in my tent
v finally feeling drunk once lena told me to get up and dance
v dancing that consisted of only running around and waving my arms like an octopus
v trying to get jasmine to dance in front of a bunch of people without music playing
v making the best goddamn nachos i’ve ever had/trying to save those nachos for breakfast the next day/realizing what a horrible plan it was to save nachos
v telling everyone how drunk jasmine wasn’t far off from sober jasmine
v Jasmine coming over to the other campsite and dancing around a bit and telling us how happy she was
v learning how to control my yelling volume + not using the word “drunk” so loudly
v jasmine stomping between campsites and yelling (I love you so much)
v bragging to julian about how i could walk in a straight line
v julian saying “yeah you’re right, you don’t seem drunk at all” then walking away and hearing him whisper “i was lyingggg” then yelling fuck you at him
v Julian being a butthole most of the time but also everyone needing to blame their frustrations on something which happened to be Julian and Ian (sorry Julian and Ian we love you)
v realizing i needed to pee only after getting comfy in my tent
v julian walking me to the bathroom when peeing in the bushes proved to be too complicated
v hmmmmm, jasmine, if YOU couldn’t pee in the bushes DRUNK…
v falling asleep extremely dizzy
v waking up scared of all nature sounds
v waking up in cold sweats and thinking someone was brushing against our tent but it was just the wind
v waking up once the wind started to find ian was awake the whole night
v sitting quietly in the dark with ian
v Going on a journey to the bathroom and then going to buy some firewood but realizing that it doesn’t open till 8 (or something) and having to wait around the playground
v Writing profanities among children’s chalk drawings
v Contemplating whether or not jasmine and ian peed in eachothers butts
v Deciding that they definitely peed in eachothers butts
v sean’s first words to me the next morning being “don’t leak” aka butt pee joke #1983274
v getting another hour of sleep once everyone left for the other campsite again
v getting snapchats from jasmine saying she was awake only to find she wasn’t awake when I really wanted to get fruit
v lena waking me up angrily asking for fruit and me responding with only shhhhhhhh
v finally getting out of the tent only to have the rain start up
v eating anything and everything for breakfast
v trying to save hot dogs for jake but telling matthew to save the wrong hot dogs soooo jake got no hot dogs (awww)
v getting really high and then deciding to make spaghetti
v interviewing everyone on how high they feel
v miles and sean looking really high but saying that they don’t feel anything
v camping spaghetti: the two hour long saga
v recipe for camping spaghetti: 1 package of spaghetti, 1 jar of bertolli’s garlic tomato sauce, 1 can of spaghetti-os, 1 diced tomato, 1 package of whole mushrooms, chopped, and 1 kinda full bottle of water
v and a lot of patience to boil noodles
v and a crappy makeshift strainer held over an empty cooler
v chef lena > chef matthew
v getting really hungry and camping spaghetti tasting like heaven
v going back in the tent to comfort ian, who had been in the tent the whole time
v never wanting to leave the tent
v ian feeling well enough to emerge from the tent cocoon
v leaving for a leisurely 1 mile nature walk that turned into a 3 mile hike to the top of a mountain
v feeling high as fuck on LIFE at the top of that mountain
v jake tripping balls on the top of the mountain
v the amazing pictures i took on the top of the mountain
v the fucking amazing rain that fell on the way down the mountain
v bonding with ingrid and sean and getting drunk with ingrid and sean shortly after
v taking those three shots with ingrid, carlos, sean, and matthew
v the feeling of rubbing alcohol in my nose
v the moment sean and matthew gave in to the idea of rubbing alcohol
v being the shot pourer for all three guys
v carlos being high as fuck from before the trip even started
v the happiest hour ever as those three shots kicked in
v Dropping the tab and feeling completely normal for the first half hour
v suddenly realizing how weird the dirt feels on my hands and deciding to rub my hands in the dirt
v deciding that I should rub my whole body in the dirt
v doing squats with lena right after the shots kicked in
v drunk sean becoming my new favorite person
v group drunk hug with sean lena ingrid and miles i think
v lena talking about sean’s small nipples
v lena tripping fucking balls
v lena tripping fucking balls
v lena literally rolling in the mud/rubbing mud all over my arm
v giggling to myself about nothing when i went to wash the mud off my arm
v eating everything in sight when drunk
v spilling ruffles on the ground rip in pepperinos
v getting really cold and trying to get warm with a towel
v washing myself off in the spigot.
v Ingrid having to dress me because what are limbs. What is time.
v Feeling a deep bond with Ingrid
v Feeling a deep bond with Yazmin and Yazmin’s hands
v “look at that! Do you see that! Do you get it!” “I completely get it”
v forgetting most events that followed.
v getting really sad when the cheese dip ran out
v ian taking care of me when i was drunk
v making quesadillas and fondue in the rain once i got sober
v Julian trying to make me smoke a candy cigarette
v Rearranging colored pencils
v Making matthew very mad at me
v ian being the best and most responsible person in the whole trip
v ians responsibility scaring the ever living hell out of lena
v taking 20 minutes to put on my leggings and sports bra while wet/drunk
v ingrid thinking i fell asleep while putting on my leggings
v ingrid and i talking about how catholic school is the best way to make sure your kids aren’t catholic
v ingrid saying “jesus is all around you” and miles starting to look worried before ingrid said “gotcha”
v the many many many trips i took lena on to the bathroom
v walking to the bathroom
v the word game that created such winning sentences as “caring creates crappy camping” and “dainty dolphins destroy dinnerware dapper, dandy”
v lena telling ian not to float away and that he has man hands
v bonding with ian for a moment as we walk to the bathroom and realizing that he’s the most responsible
v me looking at ian while lena was peeing and repeatedly emphazing i am not ready for motherhood
v adopting lena and jake like the mom figure i am
v keeping lena as happy as possible by the fire, which included an inane amount of hand groping
v thinking a lot about movies
v thinking a lot about drugs in movies
v exploring peoples hands
v ian making the “whaaaaaaa????” noise
v sean (i think it was sean but it might have been miles) CORRECTION IT WAS MILES (i deeply apologize) making the noise his fart made in mr. huidor’s class
v my winning story of farting myself awake in mr. ochoa’s class in front of eric kim
v leaving the camp fire on that uplifting note bc right after i told the story ian poked me with my pink umbrella and said he was tired and wanted to sleep
v sleeping in julian’s car
v actually getting like 7 whole hours of sleep
v waking up the next day to ian’s dulcet tones of “hey wake up”
v listening to lena talk about acid for the next 24+ hours
v listening to lena talk about acid for the rest of your life
v lena not coming down until like 5 hours ago
v lena and jasmine shopping for bras
v lena sleeping for like 20+ hours between then and now
v miles and sean telling us all the weird things they talked about all night
v like comfy scales that go up to a million
v and four bathroom trips, as if that was a lot pfft i took her like seven times ok
v and matthew snoring/using marshmallows as a pillow
v ian’s mom telling him to hug me when they came to pick him up
v me finding my underwear in the parking lot (it fell out of my roll of clothes ok)
v having waaaaay too much food to take home
v there are six tomatoes in my fridge right now wtf
v getting julian pies from julian pie company and laughing in the bathroom hallway over apple vaginas and the lady in the background of the picture i took
v sleeping for an hour on the ride back while sean took pictures of the back of me and lena’s heads
v not being able to wait for the next time we all do this again
