I'm in a cranky mood and have a spiritual taboo against fighting or saying mean things on the internet so I am going to pass this through my patron before pressing the "post now" button.
But, like, as I read more about Hindu and Buddhist cosmologies I get angrier and angrier of white dude occultists on the internet. oh, you don't think the gods have personalities? Oh, you don't think they personally talk to human beings? Oh, you don't think they fight amongst themselves?
There are Eastern texts thousands of years old saying very, VERY different things about "devas" and how you can devote yourself to them. So sorry to hear that your comparably much younger, lily white, fear-based colonialist texts and grimoires say otherwise! Too bad for you that your personal spiritual experience, which is influenced and governed by those sad, limited texts, does not have the intimacy, love, and texture that I share with my deities.
What I'm really angry about, I admit, is that I let my practice be governed and measured by people like that for so long. That I allowed myself down the path of mimicking them and being judgmental and closed-minded like them and that I did not recognize and rebuke the insidious white supremacy within those pathways sooner. To deny the personal and loving natures of the gods is to deny that they love and have personal investment in us, because we are inherently loveable and valuable, and that everything in this realm is connected. White supremacy, often using Christianity as a tool and lens, oppresses, judges, and controls all spiritual paths that teach you your worth and capacity for spiritual connection.
So I am glad that Lucifer freed me from all that and has opened my eyes. I am no less full of love for my deities than I was before him, but now I am better able to embrace the complexity that comes with my spiritual relationships. I am able to admit my own personal power in my dynamics with the gods, whom it turns out are not perfect! And while that was scary to admit at first, now we can all work on our karmic journeys as a family and there is nothing truly more fulfilling to me than that.
As a final note: do not confuse people posturing as intellectuals in western alternative religious spaces as the end all, be all especially if they express an utter lack of emotional intelligence. Also, and I regret saying this as someone who partially identifies as a dude, if they're cis guys. (I have a couple of cis dude friends who *are* emotionally intelligent in occultism so obviously not all cis dudes. But the same gender issues that happen outside of spiritual spaces happen inside of them as well and it all links back to white supremacy)
