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Phandy

So I was wondering what it would look like if Dan and Phil adopted a kid and so I wrote this little thing but just a warning it made me really emotional so I wouldn’t suggest reading

Don’t imagine them moving all of Dan’s stuff into Phil’s room and redecorating Dan’s room with pinks and purples and a little sized bed and flowery lace curtains and building all the furniture together

Don’t imagine them both laying awake all night, nervously staring at the ceiling but not saying anything because they think the other is asleep and then jumping out of bed and driving for three hours and pulling up in front of a sprawling building and then sitting there in the car for a couple seconds with their hearts pounding and then they get out with smiles and too nervous/excited to speak and they get in and even though it’s a crowd of kids they see her and they just know

Don’t imagine her with sloppy bangs and short black braids and when she first meets them she’s scared by these two tall men and hides behind the lady’s legs but DON’T imagine Dan crouching down and smiling and talking to her and showing her a picture book they got for her because they heard she likes pretty colors and so she reaches out and grabs it and sits down to read it

Don’t imagine Phil asking her questions and getting her to laugh and finding out she has the exact same sense of humor at them and she thinks that Phil is the funniest person ever

Don’t imagine them giving her a tour and leading her by the hand and she loves their house and her room and all the pretty colors on the walls and they stand back while she looks through the drawers and drawers of clothes and toys and books

DO NOT imagine them spoiling her and getting her every single thing that she wants and Dan being absolutely wrapped around her finger and doing whatever she wants even when Phil tells him not to

DON’T IMAGIne Phil sleeping in on a Saturday morning and waking up and going into the tv room to see Dan braiding her hair while she watches cartoons

Don’t imagine dan reading a bedtime and sitting next to her in bed and she has her head propped up on her hands reading along

DON’T imagine them going on walks around London but only because she begged to go see the city lights but they went too far and her legs got tired and phil gives her a piggyback ride on the way back home

DON’T imagine even a year later standing in the doorway of her room as they say goodnight and looking back on how much their lives have changed to orbit completely around their daughter and they’re struggling to realize that they have a daughter and she’s so cute and beautiful and wonderful and they feel that inexplicable overwhelming feeling in their chest and they look at each other so proud and teary eyed and they don’t have to say anything they just know

Do nOT EVEN IMAGine Dan digging up all his old tapes and dvds of Winnie the pooh and watching them with her for the first time in decades and her vocabulary slowly changing just like his did

Don’t imagine dan staying up late to research a good preschool to make sure she doesn’t get hurt and bullied like he did and talking to her about bullying and what to do when other kids are mean and trying to teach her to be nice back but at the same time not take any shit

DO NT imagine Phil realizing that Dan hasn’t cursed once in her presence and smiling to himself but never once mentioning it

DON’T imagine them dropping her off at preschool and they’re crying more than she is

D O N O T imagine phil taking her to the playground and pushing her on the swing and helping her on the monkey bars and making friends with other moms and organizing playdates

DO NOT IMAGIne dan teaching her to play piano and learning duets together and phil being their audience for their recitals and d o n t imagine how big Dan will be smiling do not do it just dont

DON’T imagine them teaching her to play Mario kart and all their favorite video games and her getting so good she beats them every time

DON’T imagine her finding out that she loves being on stage and Dan helping her and giving her tips and pulling out some of his old scripts to show her and dnp sitting in the audience being proud dads watching her perform

D O N T imagine all of the family traditions they’ll have, like Saturday movie nights and Christmas ornament making and competitions and playing video games and making cookies every Sunday and playing board games when its raining

DON’T imagine Phil hearing about a child being kidnapped nearby and teaching her to punch and kick and giving her pepper spray and using that deathly serious tone that he almost never uses but when he does she knows to shut up and listen and looking into his eyes she knows it’s serious even though she doesn’t completely understand the reasons behind it all and so she never once went outside without that can in her pocket

DON’T IMagine her being their valentine on valentines day and them showering her in flowers and presents and all her favorite candy

DON’T imagine them having a favorite movie and watching it a hundred times and practically having it all memorized and randomly reciting/reenacting their favorite scenes together

DON’T imagine her begging and begging for a pet dog and they finally give in even though it means they have to move to a different apartment that allows dogs but they do it anyway and they let her pick out a puppy and the smile on her face as she carries him to the car makes it all worth it

Don’t imagine all the inside jokes they’ll have as a family, like pretending they’re a gang and talking about their motorcycles in super deep voices or calling her “the queen”

DO NOT imagine her getting older and thinking about life and existence and Dan noticing and asking her about it and so he brings Phil in and they sit around and stay up super late sharing their thoughts and experiences

Don’t imagine all the puns she and Phil will say just to see Dan make that face

Don’t imagine them going out on a picnic and Phil packing the basket with her while Dan tries to print directions and them sitting on the grass and eating and talking and her laughing so hard she pees

DON’T imagine Dan being the overprotective dad because she and phil are the only family he has and when she’s out too late or up past her curfew he gets angry

DONT IMAGINE her slowly becoming like both of them and adopting the qualities that they love so much about the other, and she has Phil’s optimism and unquestioning love for everyone and everything and the ability to enjoy everything she tries and she has Dan’s sarcasm and wit and she’s fiercely competitive and is so considerate of others...

And even though she’s not related to them in any way, she’s more like them than if she was (somehow) their biological daughter

AND WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T imagine them refusing to acknowledge that she’s grown up even when she goes off to college and gets a job and even when she buys her own house, and its only when they see her up there in a white dress that it hits them that she’s not their little girl anymore but that’s not what makes them cry, they cry because they look back at the past 26 years that they spent with her and remember her as that shy and timid little girl and then they look at her as the confident and trustworthy and caring and mature woman that she is now and that is why they cry

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