#phil asoue

[harry-does-boys]

made a series of unfortunate events quiz to feed the brain worms. enjoy :]

this is an incredibly professional analysis btw i am 100% right about everything. also this is mainly based on the netflix series. also also

ALSO i wanna know if these quizzes are actually accurate at all so tell me if im right in thr tags

[afterthegreatunknown]

random post of headcanons of mine for some asoue characters:

georgina orwell isn’t always hypnotizing people that come into her office; she has to find other sources of income after all. when she does her actual job of an optometrist, georgina is quite good. she even has the highest rating of all the optometrists in the land of districts.

larry isn’t too happy that almost everyone refers to him as larry, your waiter. ‘your waiter’ isn’t his surname. larry knows they know his surname, but they just never say it. larry wants to quit being a waiter as result, but can’t due to being the best volunteer for the role.

r’s first name isn’t ramona, like in ramona quimby. ramona is a nickname beatrice is a part of. the ramona quimby series has ramona having an older sister beatrice, nickname beezus. as such, r got the nickname of ‘ramona’, with beatrice getting the nickname of ‘beezus’.

phil is alive by the end. phil was dismiss of service from the queequeg and vfd by widdershins, who wanted phil to get out while having that chance. phil ends up becoming a library assistant, befriending the main librarian, an old man name hal.

sally is the oldest of the sebald siblings. sally isn’t sure how the reverse came to be, but sally hates getting mistaken for the younger sibling. she once hated it so badly, she kept a copy of both of their birth certificates whenever someone incorrectly assumes.

gustav is actually his middle name. gustav’s first name is in fact, shelby. gustav goes by gustav because he thinks it sounds nicer, as well as the fact that when applying for the directors guild and writers guild, there is already an existing shelby sebald as a member in both.

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

The Quagmire-Baudelaire switch part 11

The grim grotto

The Quagmires get greeted by a submarine

And hears a man ask for the password

”VFD?” ”The world is quiet here?” ”Quagmires?”

The submarine opens and they climb in

So they are instantly greeted by a weird smiling man

It’s captain widdershins! And he talks like this! Everyone hates him but I enjoyed how he talked like this! Aye aye! I was a weird kid! But I found him more funny than annoying! Forgive me!

He introduces them to his stepdaughter Fiona

And all three of the triplet’s minds had a lowkey panic because WOW Fiona was in good shape

And that tight suit too...

And the first thing she says is literally ”shiver me timbers” in a kind of flirting way

And then comes Phil!

Phil does not do much more rather than smile and be optimistic :)

Anyway Fiona gives them a short tour and then gives them uniforms

Isadora almost starts posing in her uniforms because it feels like her you know? Maybe she’s found her style

Then they have dinner and Phil actually begs them for help because he can’t do much more than get gum

So the triplets teamwork to make some potato and garlic soup

Which became delicious

Captiain Widdershins is like ”You are so great at cooking! I should have let you come here a long time ago! Maybe adopt you! But let’s not rush! Maybe Duncan can marry Fiona! Just joking! But he who hesitates is lost!”

Duncan justs stands there in panic because he doesn’t know how to cope with someone suggesting he should marry someone he has known for an hour

And Fiona just corrects Widdershins, ”and she”.

Then they go to bed

The next day, everyone researchers pretty much all day

The Widdershins explain that they are on a mission for VFD to retrive the sugar bowl

Fiona also explains later that she is a mycologist

Which makes Isadora instantly come up with a poem to impress her

”Every human even with one eye, will spot and seek for fungi”

She then hides her face because she felt it was bad but Fiona just giggles

Then they find the gorgonian grotto

And all the children head off

They search the grotto but just finds the medysoid mycelium

When they are back they realise neither Widdershins or Phil is seen anywhere

Then they hear a clunck! And down comes a hee hee ha ha

Olaf and Esme walk around the sub and makes these weird giggle noises

Carmelita finds the triplets in hiding the storage room, which makes all three of them make an internal facepalm because she of all people found them

They get lead to the octupus submarine and witnesses all the snow scouts rowing for their lives

Anyway Quigley had trouble talking off his helmet so it’s still on

This is when he realises there’s green spots on it

Isadora and Duncan freak out

The hook handed man sees this and after a long discussion he agrees to let them atleast escape to save Quigley

Quigley is very confused since the hookhand man never cared before??

Anyway they scream to all the snow scouts to run, which causes chaos

Also Carmelita is as mad as you can be because someone ruined her recidal

They meet up with Fiona at the Queequeg

And all of them just resarches about any cure

Quigley just coughs and tells them to hurry

He then just mumbles ”try... substitutions” which was something he remembers from the night before when they had to use white garlic instead of red

They feed him wasabi and he instantly feels better

But they force him to go and rest, much to his dismay because he wants to help

So the hook handed man comes and Fiona hugs him ”Fernald!! <3”

Isadora and Duncan are hella confused

Fernald explains the situations but they are still not happy because of that

Then Olaf comes and yells at them for not being in the brig

Fiona distracts him with the medysoid mycelium in Quigley’s helmet

So he gets happy and almost goes up

Before telling her to bring the Quagmires too

This is when Fiona lets them escape

Duncan and Isadora feel a little betrayed but understands her

Fiona kisses both of them. She tells them to close their eyes

”Duncan, I am sure some things here will be useful for your journalism”

”Isadora, I know you are full of emotions and thoughts. Maybe this can help you a little.”

She leaves with a last ”aye aye” and climbs up

Duncan and Isadora start to cry while Quigley wakes up and wonder what the heck happened

”I have never in my life needed to write down things in my notebook as much as now” Duncan sniffs

”I have known all along and now I just got it confirmed” Isadora says, which just confuses the hell out of her brothers

But they have a faith idea what she could be reffering to?

Anyway the great unknown has found them so they need to dash Queepeg out of there

Eventually they find themselves on Briny Beach where mr Poe finds them

He wonders where in the world they have been and begs them to follow him

”No.” Duncan says.

Then a taxi comes

”Don’t argue with me.” Poe argues

The taxi driver is a woman who says she’s looking for the Quagmires

”Leave us alone!” Quigley yells at mr Poe

”Are you going to get into the taxi?” the woman asks and the triplets nod

”You can’t jump into a strangers taxi!” Mr Poe says desperately

”Fuck you, Mr Poe.” Isadora yells as a last word. ”I wish you nothing but sorrows and woes”

Ok I kind of forgot to mention the telegram part so now Kit just appears ready to retrieve the Quagmires. Which also could work. As always, hope you liked it

[optimisticlumber-blog]

A Series of unfortunate events:                                                                                                                          ∟ Phil Aesthetic

                                                           ∟  The Miserable Mill