May 4
They’re going to get you
seen from Spain
seen from China
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Japan
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from United States
seen from Spain
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from South Africa
seen from China
They’re going to get you
been it.
includes : yuji itadori + kenjaku ! and spoilers <3
. you stood stone still next to your grandpa, holding onto his hand tightly while you watched your father holding baby yuji, as if nothing was wrong with this
. you listened as he and your father talked, and when she ran into the room, you ran to your father, holding onto his leg and hiding behind him
. you couldn't bear to look at her, almost identical to your mother aside from those stitches across her forehead. you knew something was in her skin, pretending to be her
. you tried to argue with your father at only six, telling him that something was wrong with her, jin would only tell you to not disrespect your mother, not in front of the baby, too
. once, you cried, asking if you weren't good enough for him, so much so that he had to replace your mother with a monster just for another chance. he told you it was nonsense and told you to not interrupt sleeping yuji
. when your father died and she disappeared, you didn't really mind, much happier to live with your grandfather and yuji instead of them
. you would take care of yuji when your grandfather was tired or busy, and the rest of the time you hung out with your friends, it was nice and simple
. when yuji entered highschool, you sometimes stuck around, helping him and his occult stuff which you didn't really understand but liked his friends enough to do it
. you cried beside your grandfather during your last visit, despite his and yuji's antics. your grandfather had always been soft on you, perhaps because you had seen everything he'd seen and you could remember unlike yuji.
. you listened to his advice for yuji, having already spoken to him before your little brother showed up, hence the fact you were in hysterics
. when you realised he was moving into his new school, for something like sorcery or whatever, you were devastated but let him go
. you reminded yourself that yuji was part of something much bigger than you, now acting as a vessel with an execution that you had begged a strange, white haired and blindfolded man to call off
. before he left, you ran onto your brother, wrapping him up and reminding him to stay safe, save whoever he could and be good
. the reality hit after he left, staring down the walls of the home now empty
. you could hear the voice of your father scolding you for disrespecting 'your mother' and that baby yuji was listening, always baby yuji
. you could hear her voice, telling you off in a way that seemed so unlike the woman you had once known, of course, the only one to care was your grandfather
. you walked towards the old nursery, the one your grandfather never let you in, insisting it was cursed from that monster of a woman
. someone was there, waiting
. your eyes widened as the man turned around, familiar stitches on his forehead that made you want to puke
. he greeted you easily but all you could think of was run, hide, get away, anywhere but back in this room with her
. he disappeared after that, thankfully
. after that, you called yuji and shakily asked him to give the house an exorcism or whatever he and he sorcerer friends did
. after junpei's death, yuji came home and cried in your arms while you assured him that it wasn't his fault, that not everyone can be saved and only those who want to be saved can be
. you sold the house after that, you didn't care who to, only wanting to get rid of it, believing any who stepped inside were cursed
. when halloween rolled around, you were in shibuya with your friends and some bar you were all familiar to have a drink, closer to the outskirts of the area
. you instantly recognised what was happening from everything yuji had told you, helping your friends find somewhere to hide that you hoped was near the edge of the barrier
. unfortunately, you spotted a little girl alone, crying outside trying to find her father. it reminded you of yourself, seeking out your father's warmth despite knowing it wasn't there
. sharing yuji's dumb complex, you ignored your friends pleas and ran out to help this girl, taking a hold of her hand and asking where she last saw her father
. of course, you ran into that monster again
. for some reason, he told the little girl where to go to find her father and leave, urging her to do so. once she had, he grabbed you by the wrist, dragging you along while you yelled at him and sobbed while he smiled, taking you to some dumb cube
. you screamed that you hated him, that he ruined your family and that you wished that he never approached your father
. his only response was to ask how you would have had a little brother and as the correct response, you slapped him across the face, telling him that yuji didn't need to know about any of it, that he shouldn't bear the weight of knowing his mother was a monster
. oh, how unfortunate for yuji to have turned the corner at that moment, quickly followed by all his old and new companions
. torn between the tightening grip on your shoulder and the final piece of information connecting to his earlier memories while you sobbed and continued to hit the man in the face
. you raised your hand to slap him again before stopping right over the now red skin, collapsing into the monster before you, exhausted
. to everyone else, it was apparent this is what suguru geto wanted, based on the grin he was giving them, having a human shield that they wouldn't want to harm
. he held you as you sobbed, conversing with the sorcerers and confirming everything you had said in your breakdown
. even without being able to see curses, you knew what was behind you and you couldn't find it within yourself to be afraid, suspicions confirmed by the silence of everyone else
. you looked up at the man, your mother, kenjaku, and stared at him, giving one last act of defiance in your grandfather's name and you whispered to him, do it
. apparently you weren't very good at whispering because yuji jumped forward, yelling out as whatever curse was behind you attacked
i have had this in my head for so many months tysm for finally making it real @irunaki
RIP Ivy trio you would’ve loved Bruno Mars
umumum thing fur @placeholder-eridanfan
i kept messing up the holding hands so I did this instead cuz it wuz easier :o)
madwise edits save me madwise fics save me madwise tether save me madwise save me save me madwise
An Object in Motion (Stays in Motion)
PLATONIC Spencer x Alex (and Shayne)
Description: It wasn’t that out of the norm. People showered in the dark. It wasn’t unheard of. Sure Alex didn’t personally know of anyone who did, but it wasn’t really something people talked about anyway. They were online, he’d read about reasons for it, they’d never imagined Spencer of all people would have self-image issues.
Word Count: 3.9k
INFO: Switching POVs
Alex
Alex had been having the time of his life with Spencer at Gen Con. Testing new games, meeting new people, getting recognized for Smosh. Some people had even recognized Alex from the few times they’d been on camera and in social media posts, which felt super weird. It was awesome, but he’d often forgotten that this silly job was far more in this world than their fun workplace, making videos and playing games.
Of course, seeing as they were not only coworkers but also good friends, he and Spencer shared a hotel room in Indianapolis. It just made sense. It also made it a lot more fun.
There’s something liminal about a hotel room that makes it teeter on the edge of unreality. It makes your brain move slower, almost as though a fog has descended into your skull.
That’s why, when Alex accidentally walked in on Spencer showering, their brain didn’t fully catch up to him. Because something about the scene immediately hit him as wrong. They didn’t actually see Spencer of course, the shower curtain was there, but it took him a moment to realize that the lights were off.
Once they came to their senses, he quickly closed the door and retreated back to the desk where he was doing some work. As they tried to get back into the zone, something about what he had just seen kept tugging at his brain, a small alarm had been triggered.
Why? It wasn’t that out of the norm. People showered in the dark. It wasn’t unheard of. Sure he didn’t personally know of anyone who did, but it wasn’t really something people talked about anyway.
They really tried to not overthink it, to just get back to what they were supposed to be doing, but he couldn’t help but worry. They were online, he’d read about reasons for it, they’d never imagined Spencer of all people would have self-image issues.
Alex wasn’t judging Spencer at all; they would never. Spencer was his best friend. They just cared about him, they worried for him.
He didn’t want to mention it right away, he knew there was some sort of sleep benefit for it. Spencer was never one to care about doing things to benefit his sleep quality (case in point: the half-drunk Kickstart on the desk that he opened earlier in the evening). He dismissed that as the reason pretty quickly. No, he was worried it was for reasons that were harder to bring up.
Alex decided to keep an eye on him for the rest of the trip. He didn’t know what to look out for, but he hoped he’d find something.
They kept a close eye on Spencer throughout the next day. He knew there was something off about him, about the way he moved through certain spaces, but they couldn’t quite figure out what it was. There was nothing specific enough in each place to jump out as a potential issue, Spencer was fine in some fancy places but not others, in some rooms but not their extremely similar counterparts.
It was driving Alex up the wall that he couldn’t quite figure out what the specific trigger was for Spencer’s behavior, what the connecting trait was between these vastly different spaces.
Until they were going to a place that a friend of Spencer’s recommended.
As the doors opened, Spencer hesitated to step in for a moment, causing Alex to almost run into him. Spencer mumbled out an apology, which Alex returned out of habit. Stepping into the elevator, he waited for a moment for Spencer to press the button for the floor they were going to, but he never did. Glancing over at him, Alex did a double take.
This was like every other time he acted weirdly, but dialed to eleven.
Spencer’s eyes were screwed shut and his breaths were coming out sharper than they would naturally. Alex froze for a moment, analyzing him, before stepping in front and pressing the button to start the elevator moving.
“Hey man, are you okay?”
Spencer gave a quick nod, taking another breath before his response. “Yeah, I’m just- Yeah.”
He still didn’t open his eyes. His head was lowered, his shoulders were caved in, and his hands were stuffed into his jacket pockets.
Alex studied him for the rest of the ride, unsure of why he was doing this, but worried nonetheless.
He’d been fine in other elevators and acted weird outside of them, so it wasn’t that.
Then a thought hit him like a shock of lightning.
This elevator was different than all the other ones they’d been in. This was one of those fancy hotels with perennially polished marble floors, despite the thousands of shoes that cross them every day.
The elevator followed the trend. Not only was the floor reflective, but the walls were straight up panes of mirrors fully surrounding them.
Was that- God no. No, that’d imply a whole host of issues he didn’t know what to do with.
Alex looked around for any other answer but found none. There were only two defining traits in this particular space.
Elevator.
Mirrored.
This was the first elevator to be a problem, so that left-
Did Spencer have an issue with mirrors?
Fuck.
★✩★✩
Spencer
He didn’t even have to think about it anymore, it was just instinct. He’d notice a mirror out of the corner of his eye and tilt his head away just enough so he didn’t have to see himself in it. He’d long ago mastered the subtlety to hide the fact that he was doing it.
It wasn’t hard; if people don’t know what to look for, there’s a lot you can get past them.
He’d started doing it a long time ago, back when he was a teenager.
Initially, it was a product of his rampant insecurities that he assumed he’d grown out of. He never broke the habit simply because he didn’t feel like putting in the effort.
What’s that saying about momentum, an object in motion stays in motion unless an external force is applied to stop it? Something like that. Once the habit was established, it was just easier to keep it up.
So he did.
And now, eighteen years later, he could count on one hand the number of times he’d seen his own reflection in the past six months.
It’s not that he didn’t think of it as an issue; he barely thought of it at all.
If someone were to ask him about it, he wouldn’t know what to say. Because no one had ever been suspicious. Why spend energy coming up with an explanation when the energy could be better spent ensuring you never have to need one?
Of course, he’d never come up with a plan for being faced with an elevator that was all mirrors. Because that would be an insane thing to plan for.
But alas, here he was.
He could either refuse to take the elevator or get in and deal with it. Either way, Alex might figure out that something was up. It was a catch-22. There was no good way out of this.
Alex ran into his back. He’d been standing still for too long.
He closed his eyes and stepped in.
He was screwed.
★✩★✩
Alex
The elevator landed on their designated floor, opening up to the restaurant.
Technically it was a hotel’s rooftop bar, but that led people to forget that it was open to the public.
Alex didn’t move. He waited to see what Spencer would do. Which apparently was to keep his eyes closed and walk straight into the corner of the doorway.
He grunted as his shoulder made contact with the metal edge, but kept going until he was fully out.
Alex stood in the elevator for a moment, questions racing through their head. He shook his head and stepped out, following Spencer into the restaurant.
As they were being led to their table, Alex studied him. They felt like they were looking for ghosts, hoping that he wouldn’t find anything though they knew there was something, even if he couldn’t see it.
Sitting down, Spencer lifted his head up towards Alex then quickly lowered it back down.
“Do you,” his voice was wavering, almost at a whisper. He took a quick breath. “Do you mind if we switch seats?”
Alex quickly stood up. “Yeah, no problem.” Spencer’s shoulders visibly sagged in relief.
Alex quickly moved around the table and put his hand on Spencer’s shoulder, crouching a bit to be at eye-level with him.
“We don’t have to stay here. I’m completely down to go back to the hotel and get takeout if you’d prefer to.” Spencer didn’t move for a moment. Alex took a quick look around; it was dark enough that other people weren’t paying attention to them.
“I’m good,” he said quietly as he got up and went to the other side of the table. “Thank you.” He put his hands over his face for a moment and took a deep breath before bringing them back down to pick up the menu to read.
As he looked at the menu, Alex kept an eye on him. His jaw was set and his breathing was too controlled. Alex looked over his shoulder at his own reflection. He huffed out a short breath as he stared into his own eyes.
Mirror. Like the elevator.
Damn.
“Spencer-”
“Not right now,” Spencer interrupted harshly, then softer: “Please.”
“Okay.” Alex was feeling a near inexorable pull to question Spencer, but they kept it tethered. Instead, he tried to keep Spencer distracted, talking about work, their girlfriends, and games.
Eventually, Spencer seemed to be feeling better and started talking more. By the time dinner was over, he seemed to be back to normal. They paid their bill, and Spencer was laughing at a joke Alex said as they left their table and headed back to the elevator.
As they approached it, Spencer’s laughter died down and he set his jaw again as he glared at the elevator call button.
As Alex was looking between Spencer and the button, someone brushed by him and used their hotel keycard to swipe to open the door to the stairwell right next to them. Thinking quickly, Alex caught the door before it shut.
“Do you want to...” He held the door open for Spencer.
★✩★✩
Spencer
Fuck.
He’d been slightly out of it from the elevator and hadn’t done the usual visual sweep he does when he gets to a table.
Then Alex had sat right in front of a mirror. If he wanted to look at Alex, he had to see himself in a mirror. He couldn’t do it.
Asking to switch felt like admitting it outright, but he just couldn’t stay there.
And now they were standing in front of that goddamn elevator again. Alex was giving him a way out, somehow managed to get access to the stairs, a miracle had befallen him, yet he felt stuck.
He’d kept it a secret for eighteen years.
He’d been good. Really good. Almost-two-decades good.
He couldn’t ruin it all now. Couldn’t let everything fall apart just because of a fucking elevator. He felt Alex’s gaze boring a hole into him.
He tried, god he tried to be normal, but he just couldn’t. And Alex knew him too well; they were too perceptive.
Spencer swallowed a lump in his throat and walked into the stairwell, giving Alex a grateful nod as he passed them.
They headed down the stairs together, staying silent even as they walked back to their hotel.
★✩★✩
Alex
As Alex quietly closed the door behind them when they got back to their room, he cleared his throat. They saw Spencer’s shoulders stiffen a bit as he sat on the edge of his bed and pulled out his phone, but he showed no other acknowledgement.
They went to sit on their bed, facing Spencer and quietly gazed at him until he glanced up at them.
“What?” His voice was wavering, barely audible. He turned his phone over in his hands; even when he was looking at it, he hadn’t gotten past the lock screen.
Alex set his jaw, trying to hide the emotion that was threatening to spill over his lashes. “What happened at dinner?”
Spencer cautioned a glance at them, then shook his head. “I- I can’t. I’m sorry. I don’t, um,” he took a deep breath. “I can’t talk about it,” he finished, shutting his eyes tightly and leaning back to lay on the bed.
Alex took a deep breath, unsure of how to respond. After a few moments, they whispered, “that’s fine.” Clearing his throat, he wiped his eye with his sleeve and continued. “I’m here if you ever do want to talk. And I’m here if you don’t want to talk too.”
Spencer quirked an eyebrow at that, eyes still closed. Alex sighed. “I mean, you don’t need to explain yourself just because you don’t want to be alone.” They thought for a moment, then quickly added, “but also, if you prefer, I can go down to the lobby and get some work done if you do want to be alone.” Though Spencer couldn’t see, they let out a small smile in his direction.
Spencer hummed in thought. “I don’t want- I don’t want to be alone.”
“Then I’m here. Do you want to see what’s on tv?” At that, Spencer opened his eyes and shuffled up to sit against the headboard of his bed.
They decided on Jeopardy reruns, mostly watching in silence with the exception of trying to guess the answer every so often.
As they watched, Alex thought about what to do. He didn’t know how to talk to Spencer if he kept shutting them down, but they wanted to- no, needed to- talk to him. If whatever was going on with Spencer was fine and truly nothing to be concerned about, then great. But, if there was even the slightest chance this was a part of a much larger problem, then he wanted to be someone Spencer could lean on.
They were also smart enough to know that they couldn’t handle this on their own. He certainly didn’t know enough to know what to do, or even what to research to try to learn.
He worried that Spencer would be upset at them for telling anyone, but after wracking his brain, they thought of Shayne.
One of Spencer’s closest friends, Shayne also had to know some amount about this kind of thing, or was at least someone to be a sounding board for their concerns. Of everyone Alex could tell, they were pretty sure that Shayne would be the best option, or at least the least bad option, and he was content with that.
After a few episodes, the two of them decided to go to bed. It was getting late and they had an early flight tomorrow, plus they were filming a Smosh Mouth with Shayne later in the day.
Laying in his bed, Alex stared at the dark ceiling for what felt like forever. Spencer had long since gone to sleep; they could hear his soft snores from the other bed. They looked over towards him, his curly hair just barely peeking out from under the comforter, sleeping peacefully (they hoped).
Alex had always been annoyed when he had to sleep in the same room with someone who snored, but for some reason he didn’t mind it when it was Spencer. His snoring was a reminder that their best friend was no more than five feet away. And, on this day full of worry over him, was a reminder even when they weren’t looking.
They closed their eyes to sleep, Spencer’s snoring settling in his chest like a soft lullaby.
Alex was on guard the next morning, but nothing too concerning happened on the way back to LA.
At the airport, they had to walk down a hallway that had a long mirror on one side so Alex subtly moved to Spencer’s other side, between him and the wall, so that they would be blocking his view of it.
Spencer gave a small nod in thanks, shoulders relaxing slightly.
When they landed, they each went back to their apartments to drop off their bags, then met back up at the office to get some work done and film a Smosh Mouth episode.
It was Alex’s first time really talking on camera and they had a lot of fun. He really leaned into the chill, easygoing vibe that they normally had, but under the surface, still they were simmering with worry and anxiety, both about Spencer and his decision to tell Shayne after filming.
As time flows in only one direction, the episode came to its inevitable end.
They wrapped, put away what they needed to, and went their separate ways. Spencer went back to his desk to get some more work done and Alex followed Shayne to the kitchen.
★✩★✩
Shayne
“Hey, can we talk about something?” Shayne jumped, he hadn’t noticed Alex come up behind him until they spoke. Alex ushered out a quick apology, then restated his question, eyebrow lifting slightly awaiting Shayne’s response.
“Yeah, sure,” Shayne picked up his water bottle and turned to face Alex. “What about?”
Alex looked around, then leaned in and spoke in a conspiratorial whisper. “Not here. Outside.” At Shayne’s confused nod, they turned to walk out, pausing to make sure Shayne was following them.
Walking through the building, Shayne caught up and they fell into step together. Looking at Alex, Shayne could see clear concern on his face. At the time, he assumed he had imagined it, but when they filmed the Smosh Mouth episode he’d caught a few worried looks Alex shot towards Spencer when they knew the shot wouldn’t be on them. Maybe he hadn’t imagined it. Had something happened on the trip? What could it have been?
Shayne spiraled on the short walk out to the alley behind the building. He knew no one would look for them there. He knew that’s why Alex chose this spot.
Once Alex stopped and turned toward Shayne, he blurted out “What happened at Gen Con?”.
Alex’s eyes widened slightly as they took a deep breath. “I... I’m not sure exactly. It’s nothing super concrete, and I don’t want to make it into something bigger than it is. But I need to talk to someone about it, and you’re probably the person he’d hate the least for me to tell.”
Okay. They definitely fucked. Or something close to it. At least kissed. Relationship advice mode activated.
Shayne nodded. “Okay. Go ahead.”
“It’s hard to explain, but... Spencer doesn’t look at mirrors.”
Record scratch. His mind bluescreened for a moment. He would have bet an inordinate amount of money that Alex would have said anything that wasn’t that.
He blinked hard a few times and shook his head. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, he does his best to avoid looking into any mirrors.” Alex let out a sigh.
“Like, ever?”
“I think so. He also showers in the dark. I know there’s other reasons for it, but it holds up to my theory.”
“Okay. How- How did you figure this out?” Shayne leaned against the wall.
Alex crossed his arms and took a breath. “First was the shower thing, which I didn’t know what to do with. Then we were going to a restaurant a friend of his recommended and he kinda... Freaked out in the elevator.” They set their jaw, then continued. “Which I’m pretty sure is because it was fully mirrored. Even the floor was super shiny and reflective.”
Shayne gave a slow nod at this. “Okay. I mean that’s damning, but I’m not sure it proves that it’s mirrors specifically that he has an issue with.” He thought for a moment, then added, “I do believe you, but I don’t want to start anything or talk to him without being absolutely certain.”
Alex quickly nodded. “Oh yeah, definitely. That’s why I wanted to talk to you about it, so that it wasn’t just me sitting in my living room catastrophizing. And, you know, you’re good at this.”
Shayne let out a small laugh. “Please don’t bring up my psych degree right now.”
Alex huffed. “Nah. It’s because you’re you,” they said simply. “You care about everyone else and, from what I’ve seen, you’re good with stuff like this. Much better than I’ve ever been.”
Shayne balked at their earnestness for a moment. “Thanks, man. Honestly, I think the trick is to never assume that you do know how to handle it. That’s when you can really fuck up, when you think you’re doing the right thing but aren’t.” He gave Alex a small smile.
Alex returned the smile, then dropped it, eyes widening. “I almost forgot. Something else happened too. When we were at dinner. Neither thing on their own means much, but when you put them together, it gives a clearer picture.”
Shayne raised an eyebrow. “What happened at dinner?”
“We sat down, and Spencer wouldn’t look up. He seemed really uncomfortable and asked me if we could switch seats. When we did, I saw that there had been a mirror behind my seat. Obviously I was fine with it, but...” They trailed off.
Shayne nodded in understanding. “Including that makes for some pretty damning evidence. Yeah, I’m on board.” Something occurred to him then. “Have you ever been to his apartment?”
“No, why?”
“Me either. I was just wondering, if you had, if you’d noticed anything- Or, noticing thinking back on it.”
“Oh, yeah. No, I haven’t, that’s a good idea to keep in mind, though.”
They stood there in silence for a few minutes, each running through a rolodex of thoughts.
Shayne supposed it was normal for him to never have been to Spencer’s place, they mostly hung out at work or went out to dinner or something.
Shayne’s phone buzzed. A text from Court asking if he was ready to head home.
He and Alex headed back inside, quietly promising to keep each other updated, and to talk again whenever they had the chance.
Even if they ended up coming to the conclusion that nothing was wrong, Spencer deserved to have people looking out for him. He deserved to have people worry for him, even if he didn’t think he needed it.
★✩★✩
Spencer
Shayne and Alex disappeared pretty soon after they finished filming. He didn’t care enough to look around for them or text them, they’d show back up at some point.
He got some more work done, then ended up chatting with Court for a bit. It was only when he interrupted himself twice in the same sentence with yawns that he decided it was quitting time.
He wrapped up the conversation with Court, relaxing in the hug they gave him, and headed out to his car. On his way through the building, he passed Shayne and Alex heading the opposite direction.
He was too tired to analyze the looks they gave him (did they go somewhere together? Whatever, too tired to care) as he got into his car and drove home on autopilot. He barely even got his shoes off before he was flopping onto his bed and falling asleep.
★✩★✩★✩★✩★✩★✩
Heyyyy guys I'm back! There will absolutely be a chapter two and maybe three to this, but I can't promise anything timeline-wise. I literally started working on this one within a few days of posting Burnt (back in March lol). I tend to spend a lot of time editing these (too much time).
Lmk what you think!