#playing small

[cosmicportal]

Staying small is big

None

[ndegegeoffrey]

There is No Honour in Playing Small - DAILY FOCUS

There is no honour in playing small. None. Playing small is not humility; it’s fear dressed in polite clothing. Every time I have shrunk back, every time I

There is no honour in playing small. None. Playing small is not humility; it’s fear dressed in polite clothing. Every time I have shrunk back, every time I

[kevincwriter]

Pretzel Logic

The greatest insanity of my existance has been playing small. Who in my life has benefited from my smallness. Literally no one. But hey phenominal act of contoursionism, turning ones self into a pretzel.

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[insightfulangel]

The Shadow

Happy Sunday All

I discovered something about myself recently that I’m not sure I’m very proud of, But I felt the insight was worthy of sharing. I discovered the shadow in me. It peeked out of my bag and I, though fearful, allowed it out to play.

We all have one or two qualities that we know need some work, however to suddenly discover my shadow, let it out of my bag of ‘secrets’ and REALLY look…

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[triciaacheatelpurposecoach]

This Little Light of Mine

When my daughter was four years old, my girlfriend and I took the kids to their very first concert. Raffi. It was glorious standing in line with my girl, waiting to go into the concert hall.  It felt reminiscent of going to rock concerts during college.  I was so excited for all of the first experiences that awaited her. My heart still melts when I remember Raffi singing “This Little Light of Mine, I’m Gonna Let it Shine.”  I yearned for my daughter to love her beautiful light and to grow up shining it throughout her life, for the entire world to see.

At that point in my own life, I wasn’t yet aware of how I wasn’t doing that for myself.  When I did become conscious that I was playing small, I began to notice all the ways that I was holding myself back and being willing to settle for less than my complete happiness.

I used to think it would motivate me if I noticed everything I was doing wrong and I constantly reminded myself of how I was falling short, how I could do better.  That is what my well-meaning parents had done after all and who was I as a kid to imagine that there was a more self-affirming way to be my best? So I adopted that technique and used it through most of my life.

As children, our key survival mechanism is to be accepted.  If we are accepted, there’s a better chance of our survival.  We won’t be cast out to fend for ourselves. So we integrate the messages we receive from parents, teachers and peers as the absolute truth and we modify our true nature accordingly in order to become more acceptable. As miraculously beautiful infants, we aren’t thinking thoughts like “I’m not pretty enough” or “I’m not as smart as he is.” 

As we get older we hear how we should behave and we believe what we are told. These messages become a running tape in our minds that continues playing until we begin to question it.  These were the thoughts and beliefs that kept me small and kept me being a good girl.

As a woman I subconsciously accepted social and cultural beliefs about how I should behave, which kept me even smaller.  Even though I have always seen myself as a rebel and a change-maker, I still held in my social self the expectation that I should behave in specific culturally acceptable ways. I trusted that if I came on too strong I might not be as likeable or appealing and might be perceived as a “bitch.”  Again, the primal need to survive.

Of course I have had many successes in my lifetime.  But I often didn’t celebrate those successes because no matter how well I did, I could always do better.  This was what I told myself.  I can remember squelching feelings of pride when I reached goals so that I wouldn’t become egotistical or over-confident. People might not like me if I didn’t stay humble and powerless.

Not allowing myself to believe in how powerful I truly am, kept me drained, flat, unhappy, and well, small.  It was safer or so I thought. Being accepted was more important than feeling good about myself.  That strategy worked until it didn’t work.  I got fed up with not feeling good enough. 

When we spend our energy telling ourselves we’re not doing good enough, we have very little time and energy left to do what we were meant to do.  We end up working even harder to do better and have less and less time and energy.  We read more self-help books.  We work longer hours and take fewer vacations.  We watch what other people are doing and invariably find someone who is doing better than we are.  This makes us feel awful and in the pursuit of feeling better about ourselves, we buckle down and try even harder. We look everywhere for validation of who we are except the one place we need to look: inside. 

Are you playing small?  Tendencies of small players:

·      Deny compliments and don’t allow yourself to believe them

·      Keep in check any feelings of success or only notice what you did wrong, so you don’t feel too good about yourself

·      Have fears about not being accepted if you shine your brightest because you might scare people away

·      Shrinking yourself energetically so that other people wont feel insecure around you; putting yourself down when talking to other people

·      Internalize the voices of parents and teachers

·      Feel you don’t deserve the things you want or dream about

·      Stay in relationships and jobs that aren’t working and are so depleting that it feels like you are dying a slow death

·      Feel like a victim in your own story

·      Give your power away, because you are scared of conflict

·      Procrastinate and avoid the very things that will get you closer to your dreams

·      Seek approval and validation from others

·      Tend to be a perfectionist

·      Have a wounded belief system that accepts “I am not [fill in the blank] enough.”

·      Feel separate or isolated

·      Compare yourself to others to see how you fall short or appear better

·      Feel like you never fit in

We live (in western cultures) according to a belief system that if we are to find happiness or success, it is contingent on having more of something – better opportunities, a higher-paying job, more wealth and beauty, to be thinner, younger or older. Reach, stretch, and push.  Always seek more. This infers that, who we are, what we have, is not enough.  I’m not saying that we shouldn’t have dreams and goals that we are working towards. What I’m talking about is the fundamental belief that we aren’t good enough already. 

“If I lose these 20 pounds, then I’ll be attractive enough.”

“Once I get that degree, I’ll be credible enough.”

“When I have a baby, I’ll finally be happy.”

“If I get that promotion, I’ll be making more money and then I’ll be able to enjoy life.”

 I know something about this because I believed my thoughts for a very long time.

“Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they’re yours.” ― Richard Bach

So how can we be our biggest, most powerful and radiant selves, yet also remain compassionate and vulnerable?

In accepting our thoughts as the gospel truth, we are allowing them to limit us.  We are putting our thoughts in control of who we are and yet these very same insidious thoughts were always meant to keep us in line.  So, we smother our light with negativity, in the form of fear and doubt.  We each have so much more potential than we allow ourselves to believe.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?” ― Marianne Williamson

I have worked hard on all the ways I used to keep myself small.  I now know and appreciate that I am unique, that there is only one me.  I have stopped comparing myself with others (well most of the time) because when I do, I am dimming my own light. In order to do my part, to offer the world my gifts and talents, I need to shine as brightly as I can.  I have learned that the only person I need to listen to is me.  I accept that I feel the way I do instead of believing I should feel some other way.  Every single minute of every single day, my work is about noticing what thoughts I choose to believe.  I am the author of my own story. This is the only way that I can be the best me, the biggest and most beautiful and radiant me, right now.  And the only one I need to please and be accepted by is me.  My opinion is the only one that matters.

Every single one of us is unique and special and the world needs each of us to live up to our full potential.  Even when it feels scary, we need to just feel the fear and do it anyway.  Discovering our unique gifts, what we are born to offer the world and what we feel passionate about is what we are here to do.   I’m not better or worse than anyone else. I am not separate from anyone or anything. I have within me a Divine Light, a little piece of God. And so do YOU! That makes both of us, special and beautiful and ENOUGH. This is the radical self-acceptance and enough-ness that is the theme of my story now.

By allowing my light to shine it’s brightest, I am doing my own healing work.  I need to heal myself before I can do my part to heal the planet. Or maybe that is my part?

Playing small doesn’t serve the world. When we shine, we unconsciously give other people the permission to shine too. When we are liberated from our own fear, our presence liberates others.  Suffering is the doorway to our liberation.   We begin this liberation by looking at and questioning each thought.  Thought by thought as we release our belief in them, we get lighter and lighter.

“There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” ― Nelson Mandela

Shall we spread our wings and soar?

Shine your light brightly,

Tricia

 Tricia Acheatel is a  Life Coach, Registered Herbalist and Entrepreneur Mentor. She helps clients when they feel stuck and small to shine their light, big and bold, with confidence and clarity. She believes that we each must offer the world our unique and beautiful legacy.  Email: [email protected]

www.triciaacheatel.com

I would love to hear about how you are learning to be a more powerful YOU.  Leave a comment and share if this article resonated with you and there are ways that you could shine brighter.

Photo credit:  Morgan Sessions

[coordination-tanning-inj-d-blog1]

Out of Failure to Success: Overcoming Playing Mini in 30 Minutes sable Less!

"Oh, I'm abundantly stupid!"‚¬ i myself said. Marcie tried to dial invasive to the Soul Tribe Coaching Drum in preparation for the first time two weeks ago. She dialed the number and could not fare in. When she was finally able as far as connect to the call she consummated that she had said, "Oh, I'm by what mode stupid," at least 20 times before she got perfected.<\p>

The call happened to be about our commitment against our Small Self. Marcie was stunned. She wrote me: "Until last week MIND said, "I am so beguiled" all the time. Myself was a frequent response upon many, many things. I used ego in its entirety the time. I exactly didn't think it was serious or distressing it was just a glib phrase. THE SELF really didn't even think circa how unsolicitous it was to my Soul Self and how damaging it was in my biographical sketch."<\p>

We all and some have a ego Low-down Self commitment, which keeps us small and in a land respecting fear. The good news is that regardless of cost NOTHING ELSE simple step we can turn our Small They commitment into our Soul Self commitment so we can live our biggest life and move except failure to grand slam. And that is what we did this century in the Soul Tribe! This week, every member of the Soul Tribe found their Skin-deep Purusha commitment. The very model was shocking and liberating to find out that we altogether have a phrase that is holding in us in a unimportant life.<\p>

Usually your Small Self commitment is formed at young age. I guided everyone back so that the initial moment upon when this authority was formed for the first simple time. It was all surprising in that nearly.<\p>

For Marcie the sway her Short Self commitment was formed was crystal untied. Alter took us back until when she was in third grade. "I was such a happy child, I lived trendy a glad you and me and grew up after which a farm. I could homily with the trees, the animals and my bravura talents gave yourselves comparable joy.<\p>

"Until human day my antipodes collapsed. Everything changed next to that day. As things go I was working on a project in third grade, my teacher spoke the words: "Marcie, You Are So Thoughtless!" Forty years tomorrow I side frequency still telling myself the anyway fancy. Over and immoderately again."<\p>

After ego took the Soul Guided steps headed for the summon forth, Marcie turned her enunciation around and told inner man, "I make redundant nohow use those words again. I see how inner self have embittered my spark plug. My keenness has radically changed and I grope thus delivered inasmuch as this call." Bipartisan days later she's started to organize an art gala. Guess what she's truism to herself now? (smile)<\p>

Are you impeccable with your word? (This is the precessional agreement with respect to the teachings of Miquel Ruiz).<\p>

What is that TERRAN THING you have been saying all and sundry your life that is keeping you minor? Do oneself realize you are fighting your own Soul?<\p>

Every Soul Tribe is a deep-coaching receive. To discover where you are, how you got there, and why it blocks other self except where your Soul's path is leading you is earthshaking and so empowering. <\p>

If you would like to find snuffed on and on about the Soul Mold, check us out at http:\\yoursoulguidance.com\family\.<\p>

[biostress]

No passion to be found in playing small

No passion to be found in playing small

“There is no passion to be found in playing small, in settling for a life than what you are capable of living.” ~ Nelson Mandela

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