I don’t have anything clever for this one. @pocotippy
Legend: The ones with the least development are probably Bloodborne, Mario, and Sonic.
Poco: Let’s do Sonic
Legend: Yes let’s
Legend: So do you know who everyone is
Poco: I’m rereading the plot post now
Poco: Got it!
Legend: Yeah that’s not super helpful, but okay.
Legend: You can see just how crappy the “plot” is
Poco: XD Not for long
Legend: Not with YOUR MAGIC TOUCH
Poco: Ok so with the chaos emeralds, they’re all scattered everywhere and everyone is basically just running around trying to find them for various reasons is the gist of it, of course
Legend: Right yes, everyone wants chaos emeralds
Legend: And some of them help each other and fight others
Poco: But like Brian just makes a bunch of “terrifying” robots for Arin and Danny (sometimes the others too) to fight
Poco: Omg imagine if some of the robots are based off NSP songs, like a giant cookie bot XD
Legend: DINOSAUR ROBOTS THAT SHOOT LASERS?
Poco: YES!
Legend: Omg I love it
Poco: And Danny is just like “o god these are awesome” and everyone else is just like “they’re super tacky BUT O GOD THEY COULD ACTUALLY HURT US!”
Legend: WHY DO ALL OF THESE ROBOTS LOOK LIKE THEY’RE STRAIGHT OUT OF AN 80S MUSIC VIDEO
Legend: But also, suggestion: Since they’re based off of real NSP stuff, maybe Danny’s singing voice could short them out or something
Poco: YES! I am 100% for this
Poco: And like Brian just never corrects it because he forgets and totally not because he likes Dan’s singing what
Legend: Hahaha he starts working with like Ross and Holly and they’re like “that is an obvious flaw why do you never fix it” and Brian is like “WHAT FLAW WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT”
Legend: “MY ROBOTS ARE PERFECT”
Poco: “I HAVE A PHD!”
Legend: Omg Brian why
Legend: It’s a PhD in romance obviously
Poco: Clearly
Legend: But also Holly being the only competent villain probably because ross is far too sadistic for his own good
Poco: And like he’ll distract Dan or something while Arin actually fights the robot just so he doesn’t immediately knock it out
Poco: And yes Holly is the only competent one
Poco: Ross is too busy being an annoyance/a tease
Legend: Oh yes totally, I agree with that. Because Arin can’t fuckin control his own speed
Legend: Ross gets too cocky
Poco: Arin just freaking runs into walls sometimes
Legend: Oh yeah and he gets VERY MAD about it
Poco: And he like blames it on the wall, like he starts swearing at it for existing
Legend: “Dan I swear, this wall just SHOWED UP OUT OF NOWHERE. Like this fuckin wall who does it think it is just GETTING IN MY WAY. Doesn’t it know WHO I AM”
Poco: And Dan is just hovering in the air dying of laughter
Legend: If Dan is Tails does that mean he can fly planes because I’m worried if he can
Poco: Ya he is a pilot, that’s like Tails’ thing, that and being a mechanic
Legend: Daniel actually being competent with technology can you believe it
Poco: Only for this one AU, just one
Legend: Hahaha yes
Legend: Also I’m just gonna put this out there
Poco: O my god imagine Ross going around and just annoying everyone cause he can, especially Danny and Brian they’re his favorites
Poco: Tell me
Legend: Knuckles and Rouge have like...a thing in the games... *cough*rubberdoop*cough*
Legend: Also yes to that
Poco: XD Yes totally Ross and Barry in that same weird love hate relationship
Legend: YES!
Poco: Also at some point somebody would probably question why Danny and Arin are in dresses
Legend: So is Ross
Legend: Why would anyone question that
Legend: Oh wait no Ross actually has pants, my bad
Poco: I just feel like it would be a funny meta joke
Legend: or...tights I guess
Legend: Barry is just like “dude are you actually gonna fight in that” and Arin is like “UM STYLE AND ARMOR, WHAT MORE COULD I ASK FOR”
Poco: YES! Anyways Brian and Danny should also have a thing going on. I know Eggman and Tails like never interact just the two of them, but c’mon it needs to be a thing in this AU
Legend: Oh I’m down for some Ninja Ship Party I got you
Legend: It’s like “you build robots, I build robots, looks like we have a lot in common”
Poco: YES! And like Danny is of course basically oblivious to this
Poco: But Brian totally has a thing for Danny, though he will deny it forever
Legend: Brain just constantly capturing just Danny because “oh NO Arin is TOO FAAAAST~ guess it’s just you and me Dan”
Poco: XD Totally! And of course Ross is well aware of all of this and teases Brian about it
Legend: Oh it wouldn’t be Ross if he didn’t
Legend: Meanwhile Holly is like “hey you know those ALL POWERFUL CHAOS EMERALDS THAT WE NEED”
Poco: Ya, I mean of course they’re all focused on getting them, but some of the grumps may be a bit...distracted~
Legend: Which is why Holly has to keep them in line
Legend: Also Suzy tagging along with Dan and Arin because they’re SO COOL
Poco: Of course, and she has her super cool giant mallet that Arin just thinks is awesome
Legend: Yeah, but she still somehow gets the “pfft incompetent girl” treatment that Amy gets all the time, even though she’s super badass
Poco: Which totally sucks btw. Also Brian kidnapping Dan cause he ‘needs his help with a robot’
Legend: Oh my god there being an entire point where Dan is just sitting in a cage as a hostage stubbornly refusing to help Brian build another robot he’s gonna have to fight later
Legend: And Brian is just like “come oooooonnnnn”
Poco: XD Exactly, and while he has Dan kidnapped he’s also ‘subtly’ trying to impress/flirt with him and it’s just not working at all
Legend: He’s just like “hey check out this really cool robot I made, it specializes in playing romantic violin music. And this one prepares 5 star meals specifically designed for candlelit dinners that’s weird huh”
Poco: “Hey look I have this whole giant lab and also all of this music you like, wow what a coincidence”
Legend: “So weird that I also happen to have these tickets to your favorite band’s concert and you know Ross and Holly aren’t super into it so if you wanted to go with me...”
Poco: XD And all of this is just going flying over Dan’s head. Omg imagine if Brian like forced Ross to be there as his wingman and Ross just facepalming
Poco: Like Dan trying to escape or at least actually do the work so he can leave and Brian is just trying too hard
Legend: Brian leaves the room for like two minutes because HE NEEDS A PLAN E NOW. And Ross is just like “look, dude, here’s what’s happening, please turn him down so we can all go back to our lives and he can just STOP”
Poco: But Danny still doesn’t get it, eh’s like “turn him down? what for, I’m the prisoner here” (I really don’t want Danny to just shut Brian down)
Legend: (You’re too kind to him) Ross probably tricks him into “rejecting” Brian even though Danny doesn’t know what he’s doing
Poco: (Look ok I love this kind of thing and don’t want poor sad rejected Brian) And Ross is like “o that sucks buddy” and Brian is like “I still have a shot!” because Dan messed up on ‘rejecting’ him
Legend: (Okay I’ll let you have this) We just need Brian to focus for like 0.2 seconds so that Holly and Ross can actually find some chaos emeralds
Poco: (Thank you) And yes of course Brian’s main goal IS the chaos emeralds, this is just a subplot
Legend: I’m just saying like, it definitely distracts him a fair amount. But also it kind of helps because Arin is constantly rescuing Danny while Holly and Ross (and Barry) are just nabbing emeralds left and right
Poco: And Arin is getting so fed up because then they have to go and get them back from Ross and Holly (Barry is fine)
Legend: Barry is just completely doing what Barry needs to do and I love it
Poco: Exactly, like Barry is just protecting the emeralds and Arin and Danny help him out occasionally so he’s cool with them
Legend: And then fuckin Ross and Holly break into his shit and he’s like “these fuckers I swear to god”
Poco: XD Barry is just minding his business when he just suddenly hears a crash and some swearing
Legend: And Ross just comes stumbling in because he ran ahead of the plan and Holly is behind him like “no you idiot wait”
Poco: XD And he sees Barry and he just immediately goes “o, hey Barry” and Holly facepalms. Though to be fair, if Ross is Rouge then he can be a competent thief at times.
Legend: Well yes, at times, but it’s also Ross so like...he’s mostly talk. If Ross actually gets the element of surprise on his side, he’s great, but if you see him coming he’s all stumbly and awkward
Poco: Exactly, especially if Barry catches him ;)
Legend: Niiiiice
Legend: Like Ross is constantly trying to steal Barry’s shit, but once he gets caught he’s just like “oh hey what’s up with you by the way”
Poco: “O what you have nothing planned that’s weird I didn’t even know” *puts away Barry’s calendar*
Legend: “So you wanna like hang out later orrrr....”
Poco: Meanwhile Barry has made like a mental checklist or something so he always knows exactly what Ross stole and he’s like “cough it up”
Legend: But then maybe if Barry gets back all the stuff Ross stole, then he’ll be like “alright we can hang out”
Legend: Just like as incentive
Poco: YES! And Ross just gets super happy. Also Ross using his thief skills to surprise tackle hug Barry :)
Legend: Awww Barry keeping himself unaligned with the side of good and evil specifically because he leans toward good, but then he wouldn’t see Ross as much
Poco: Aw yes, completely. Also Ross at some point or other teams up with literally everyone
Legend: Ross being the only one to TRULY have no alignment because he’s annoying with everyone but also kind of lovable at the same time? Even though he’s like “NO I’M SUPER EVIL”
Poco: Yes completely and like everyone knows that Ross is the one true wild card in all this so they are a bit wary of him
Poco: Also I’m going to have a nap because I cuddled more than I slept oops
@pocotippy and I are too self aware now. This one’s for you @i-am-avacado <3
Legend: You wanna plot rant before we forget?
Poco: Of course I do
Legend: Well I think Avacado’s gonna go insane if we don’t do kid grumps so
Poco: They have been very adamant about it, haven’t they
Legend: Yes, in fact, they have.
Poco: Shout out to you Avacado cause this is going in the plot rant!
Legend: YEAH IT IS. GO AVACADO.
Poco: Just for you boo <3
Legend: So I realized it doesn’t really have...like a plot? Like we’ve talked about a ton of stuff and we know how it STARTS
Legend: But like
Poco: Well I mean we do have those backstories already so that’s that down and yes, we do have the beginning.
Legend: Yeah, but like what after that
Legend: Also I love high school grumps. Or even middle school, but mostly high school. The idea just makes me happy.
Poco: I mean, it could be as simple as like just following them all through life? Like we’re just watching their lives happening. Or we could go meta and make it all like a documentary about them.
Legend: Well I mean both could be really similar
Legend: It’s probably better to just go with the non-documentary style though because then you don’t have to have like weird interviews and stuff?
Legend: Like there doesn’t have to be any believability
Poco: Ya sure dude, let’s do that
Poco: Though I do have to say, I love over narration and stuff
Legend: Okay so what haven’t we established through asks and stuff that we need
Poco: Um...
Poco: Let’s see.
Poco: We have a lot dude, but most are just adorable headcanons so we have two options. More adorable headcanons or making up actual character arcs for each of the grumps.
Legend: I say character arcs. I mean, the adorable headcanons never stop coming.
Legend: So we should get in on this while we have the chance
Legend: Plus, some of those arcs could INVOLVE adorable headcanons
Poco: That is very true
Legend: Okay so who should we start with?
Legend: Probably Dan or Arin, right?
Poco: So let’s see, ok should I pull up the backstories or just go without them
Poco: And ya Dan or Arin
Legend: Uh shit you can if you want. I don’t super remember them.
Legend: Let’s do Dan, since hew as the first at the orphanage anyway.
Poco: I mean, I have them mostly memorized just because I memorize most of the things about your AUs because I can, but still pulling them
Poco: And yes Dan
Legend: That is the sweetest thing I love you
Poco: Aw it’s no problem, I always memorize things I like
Legend: AH <3
Legend: We need to focus before I become a gushy mess
Legend: Dan’s main goal is pretty much music, isn’t it? Get into music, make the band, do all that.
Poco: I mean it usually is, but sure, and yes, Dan’s goal will definitely be music.
Poco: But going off his backstory, his main goal is to make people happy and just get some recognition because his parents were always too busy fighting to give him that.
Legend: Oh yes that, too
Legend: Which I mean, music probably plays a huge part in
Legend: Like it’s the easiest way for him to get those things because he’s so naturally talented so he’s like “this must be my calling”
Poco: Exactly, and you just get such a rush on stage and you can practically feel the energy from everyone around you.
Legend: Oh yeah, definitely. And of course, his family always dotes on his musical skills and such.
Poco: Of course they do, so maybe in his teen years he tries to push away from his family a bit more with his music, but when he really needs them they’re still there.
Legend: Oh yeah, angsty teen Dan definitely tries to “be his own person” and I think is probably the most likely to hang out with the “wrong crowd”
Poco: Ya he is, teen Dan ends up in some not ok places. So I feel like Brian would end up secretly following him and saving him sometimes without him knowing it’s Brian
Legend: Brian is definitely the unsung protector of the family. He looks out for all of his siblings, ESPECIALLY Dan
Legend: But the problem is he’s not one for real talking, so he never sits down with Dan and tells him like “Hey maybe don’t do that”
Legend: So no one ever tells him he’s doing something wrong because Brian keeps covering for him.
Poco: Well I mean Vernon and Jack would try, but Dan would just go like “whatever Mom!” type of thing
Poco: I imagine like Jack goes up to Brian one day and is just like “....keep looking out for him” and walks away
Legend: AH I’M NOT CRYING
Legend: SOMEONE PUT TEARS ON MY PILLOW
Legend: But like I have to imagine at one point Dan would do something that would like snap Brian’s tether, you know?
Legend: Like something so stupid or dangerous or both that Brian is just like “FINE OKAY I GET IT, YOU WANNA BE DUMB? SEE IF I CARE”
Poco: YES! Exactly! And Dan suddenly realizes all Brian has been doing for him and he corners him somehow and actually talks with Brian
Legend: I feel like that point is when NSP would ACTUALLY start. Like sure they did silly song things before and they’ve probably written some songs that they would use, but that’s when the band becomes OFFICIAL because that’s the point where they go “oh we’re looking out for each other and we both care about the same stuff, we should do this”
Poco: Yes, like that’s their big bonding moment. Also I feel like Brian’s character arc should be him learning to accept his emotions, showing his feelings, and caring about other people--just letting things out.
Legend: I agree with that whole heartedly. And his and Dan’s arcs intertwine so much because they’re so involved in each other’s lives and care about each other so much.
Poco: Yes and like even when Dan’s trying to be his own person in high school, everyone knows that Brian is always there for him, even if Dan isn’t aware of just how much Brian is there
Poco: Like physically and emotionally
Poco: Even though the physically there part kinda freaks people out a bit
Legend: Brian is ALWAYS THERE
Legend: But yeah, Dan probably has this big deep disconnect where for the longest time he feels like he’s doing things all by himself, but then the big revelation is that no, he’s always been doing this with Brian and Brian is always gonna be there for him.
Poco: And of course the same can be said for the rest of the family
Poco: Like Dan never actually leaves his family, he just gets a bit more distant
Poco: Anyone messes with his family, he is on that
Legend: Oh no of course he never actually leaves them. Just emotionally he feels disconnected and left out a bit
Legend: He would defend them all until the day he dies and he’s not gonna let his little baby siblings see him upset about anything
Poco: Yes! Of course, they are the strongest family
Legend: Okay so then I think we just killed two birds with one stone
Poco: Yes we did, and now Arin
Legend: Yes, what does Arin want in his heart of hearts
Poco: Well I say it’s just getting the confidence to go out there and show his art
Poco: Cause his parents, remember?
Legend: I told you I don’t remember
Legend: But yes that is important he needs confidence
Legend: But I think that one would probably have to come from outside the family, you know? Because Arin probably thinks like “oh they only like it because they’re trying to be nice because they’re my family”
Poco: Yes definitely and to remind you (and anyone else reading this) Arin’s parents were activist protestors who died for their messages and Arin was labelled as a cursed child because he got the warning letter first and found the bodies
Legend: RIGHT YES the super dark one I remember now
Poco: So yes Arin is good outside the family, he needs more from the outside world
Poco: I should just remind everyone of the backstories for each of them shouldn’t I
Legend: You can if you want, I don’t remember them either so if you wanna do the sparknotes version go for it
Legend: I think Arin’s main confidence is gonna come from like supportive art teachers and stuff. And he’d make friends in those classes.
Poco: Yes! He just needs to find that one teacher who like encourages him to keep going. Also maybe an art rival?
Legend: ...You mean like Ross
Legend: Who is probably just naturally showing him up without even trying and Arin is just like GOD DAMMIT ROSS
Poco: XD Ya maybe
Poco: Ross’s backstory doesn’t really affect him right now. His parents were on the run and dropped him off so he would be safe from harm.
Legend: I feel like Ross’s main source of angst is just getting over the fact that the orphanage is all he’s ever known and finding out that he’s more than just his past, y’know? Like he’s someone other than “that annoying kid that’s been in an orphanage all his life”
Poco: Exactly! Like he goes through a whole thing about being obsessed about who he was that he doesn’t think about who he is or who he’s going to be
Poco: (brb taking dog for a walk)
Legend: (I shall continue to rant for you. Tell your dog I love it)
Legend: Ross definitely dwells on the past too much and kind of gets stuck in this run of what he thinks he’s supposed to be because of his past
Legend: Like he starts seeking out people to make angry because “they’re not gonna like me anyway, so why try”
Legend: But obviously it’s his shit attitude that’s ruining it for him, not his actual likability
Legend: And maybe he accidentally gets involved in something--like doing art for a school thing (yearbook or the newspaper or something?) and he drops his guard for like ten seconds, long enough to actually show people that he’s not actually a dick and that he’s got skills and interests
Legend: And he gets friends--REAL FRIENDS--from it that he’s convinced at first are just using him or lying about liking him or something, but they’re actually good people and they show him that he can look forward without focusing on his past and all that
Legend: And he just needs positive role models okay
Poco: YES! OMG ALL OF THIS FOR ROSS! (also my dog loves you and everyone reading this too)
Legend: (yaaaay) I love Ross like way too much okay fight me
Poco: No I agree, Ross needs more love
Poco: Now which grump is next...
Legend: Ummm Suzy, Holly, or Barry, you pick
Legend: Oh or Kevin too I guess
Poco: Well I mean Kevin is a baby right now, and doesn’t have a backstory, so I feel like he would just be watching his siblings (especially Barry) and doing his own thing
Legend: Yeah I don’t know much about Kevin anyway so that’s fine
Poco: Kevin is a smol baby and everything is FINE for him, ya got that you angst obsessed maniacs, leave poor Kevin alone
Legend: Yes protect Kevin hahahaha
Legend: So then who next
Poco: Um...Suzy?
Legend: Okie dokie let’s see....
Poco: O right backstory
Poco: Suzy was raised by a single mom with little money. The only thing other than the essentials her mom ever got her was some cheap lipstick. Eventually her mom couldn’t afford it anymore and Suzy went into the system
Legend: Okay so Suzy’s should be like embracing her individuality and like learning to stand up for herself and such
Legend: Like not just letting people walk all over her and realizing her needs are valid and stuff
Poco: Yes! Learning that she is allowed to do what she wants and doesn’t constantly need to worry about others
Legend: Like she’s constantly looking out for all her siblings and friends and putting them first and like constantly putting herself down because “she doesn’t deserve it”
Poco: Like o no they wanted to do this and and I’m not that important anyways
Legend: Exactly! And she has to finally be like “OKAY I NEED TO LOOK OUT FOR MYSELF FOR A SECOND”
Poco: Yes! and she starts getting more stuff she wants and becoming the awesome fashion queen we know and love
Legend: Totally. I think finally her family would grind her down a bit too much. Like too many siblings asking for too many things and taking her for granted and then boom she snaps
Poco: I mean I think it would more be people outside the family, wouldn’t it? Like maybe she gets involved into too many clubs and says yes to too many projects
Legend: I guess that too, but I feel like clubs would be like her ‘fun’ thing where she gets to do what she wants and stuff. Like her family would unintentionally take her for granted and be like “nah Suzy is always there for us. She’ll totally do that thing” and promise for her to do things she doesn’t even know about
Poco: O ya maybe
Legend: But the clubs probably do add a lot of stress
Poco: Also I feel like Arin would totally be “yes, you go girl” for Suzy
Legend: Oh yeah, he’s her right hand buddy
Poco: Of course he is
Legend: So then Holly or Barry?
Poco: You choose
Legend: Okay Holly I guess
Poco: Okay Holly backstory time peoples!
Poco: Holly’s parents were huge germaphobes and kept her trapped in her room most of her life with only a small window to the outside world. They were so scared of germs they barely even fed her and when she was eventually saved by child services, she was malnourished and dehydrated
Legend: I feel like hers should be like really light and kind of a break from all the angst. She’s just so pure and beautiful. So it’d just be like her trying to find out what her true passion in life is.
Poco: Yes, she’s just exploring the world and it’s all bright and colorful and wonderful!
Legend: And she’s so happy and friendly and just does a bunch of things to try them
Legend: Which maybe she doesn’t always pick the best stuff to do, but y’know she ends up alright in the end
Poco: Ya and of course she spends a lot of time in nature and stuff
Legend: Oh yeah and she learns that the birbs are her calling
Poco: Obviously
Poco: And finally Barry
Legend: Well that was easy. BARRY
Poco: Final backstory time!
Poco: Barry had an abusive drunken father and got beaten if he tried to talk or stand up for him or his mom
Poco: Ya the backstories were supposed to be angsty sue us
Legend: Yep! Okay so I think Barry’s would take a while because it’d be him kind of learning that most people won’t persecute him for speaking out
Legend: So like he has to learn that he can share his opinions and talk if he wants
Poco: Ya it’s him learning to have a voice and letting his ideas be heard
Legend: Which, like, his family is all about helping him, but I feel like Barry is the most babied kind of? (Aside from Kevin, who is a literal baby)
Poco: Exactly, so he’s kinda like “guys it’s ok I can handle this” sometimes
Legend: But they’re like “no Barry don’t stress yourself we got it, you just don’t worry ur pretty lil head”
Poco: Ya so he gets a lil annoyed sometimes
Legend: But soon he’ll find his voice~
Poco: And it will be awesome
Legend: Truly
Legend: Did we just do it? I think we just did it
Poco: WE HAVE DONE IT!!!
Legend: WOOOOO
Poco: FOR YOU AVACADO! ALL FOR YOU BABY
Poco: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Legend: YES THIS WAS JUST FOR YOU, MY FRIEND
Legend: Also I love kid grumps BUT MOSTLY YOU, AVACADO
Poco: I mean we would have done this at some point anyways but still
Legend: Well yeah, but whatever
Poco: Yes, and if anyone else wants to request a plot corner, feel free to!
@pocotippy get a little too comfortable with each other during this one. that’s your warning.
Legend: ...Also if you wanted to make some plot babies I’m down *eyebrow waggle*
Poco: O my so forward, of course I would love to darling.
Legend: Let’s get funky baby.
Poco: O hell yeah dude, you choose an AU this time since I’ve chosen the last few times.
Legend: Oh okay hmmm let’s do Action Girlz. I love them but it’s so undeveloped.
Poco: O yes definitely
Legend: Firstly, I think they’re definitely Erin and Dani instead of Arin and Danny just for convenience sake.
Poco: Of course, yes, but the real question is, Dan’s car. What condition is that poor machine in at this point.
Legend: Oh a disaster. Broken headlights, bent bumpers, etc. I bet it’s hardly driveable.
Poco: Like half the time it just stops so she has to pound on the top of it to get it running. and it does the coughing sound like it’s dying.
Legend: That’s probably why she can’t drive straight for shit. Her car is so out of line it’s like “what even is a straight line”
Poco: Well I’m sure it definitely doesn’t help, but I doubt she had much driving skill to begin with. Like she probably joined the race on a dare or something.
Legend: What if she showed up to like support a friend and Erin started shittalking her until she was like “ALRIGHT FUCK YOU I’M GONNA BEAT YOU”
Poco: O MY GOD YES! And Erin can barely drive but she is much better than Dani at least.
Legend: Erin has like basic driving skills but yeah, she’s not great. PLUS they’re driving on a literal college campus and inside buildings so it’s like??? “What are we even doing???”
Poco: O wait gotta take off for a hot sec, you know the drill continue to message with any more ideas you have.
Legend: Okie. Let’s seeeee...Erin cursing at the other girls that pass her.
Legend: Like really LOUDLY and way too aggressive for the weight of the comp.
Legend: And also maybe Dani being the only one that yells them back and Erin is like “ohhh a feisty one nice” and they start yelling at each other but also laughing really hard at the shit insults???
Legend: Shit I gotta shower brb
.........
Poco: Dude I literally just got back from my shower and now you go jeez
Poco: But yes to all of these, I love the fact that when Erin first saw Dani, he thought that she would just be like a nice sweet girl but then she’s like “Whoa the kitten has claws nice!”
Poco: Also I had an idea on how to fit Ross and Barry (Barbara and Rose in this AU I guess??? Maybe???)
Poco: Like each of the racers has a girl watching them racing and like giving them advice and instructions.
Poco: So Rose is Erin’s girl and Barbara is Dani’s
Poco: So they’re just like sitting somewhere watching the chaos happen
Poco: And of course talking to their respective drivers
Legend: Barbara and Rose oh my GOD I’m so on board
Legend: Rose would literally never shut up trying to give Erin directions and berating her when she did something wrong or whatever
Poco: Exactly! And they would end up getting super sassy with each other
Legend: And Barb would just be like “Dani...please...just...drive straight for two seconds. STOP RUNNING INTO THE LOCKERS PLEASE.
Poco: Ya Barb is like begging Dani and Dani is just like “Barb I’m try--O GOD!”
Legend: “DAMMIT. DAMMIT. DAMMIT” is all that can be heard over the headset
Poco: Meanwhile, Erin is just getting SO sassy cause she is dealing with Rose while simultaneously smacktalking Dani.
Legend: There is so much smacktalking happening in this.
[brief interruption of me fangirling about Girl Grumps]
Poco: Well how about the reason Erin started smacktalking Dani was because oh god it’s that girl again why is she here she isn’t supposed to be here. and what no Erin doesn’t have a crush on her shut up Rose.
Legend: Erin is one of those girls that’s like “no making fun of her is TOTALLY flirting”
Legend: But then Dani starts yelling shit back and laughing at it and erin is like “SHE’S FLIRTING WITH ME.”
Poco: Erin - “I’m winning her heart!” Rose - “Um, I think you’re just making her mad...”
Legend: Maybe Rose is trying to be her wingwoman and Rose is jus tlike trying to talk Erin out of all of these terrible “flirting” tactics.” But also at the same time Rose is up there in the communication booth or whatever the fuck talking Erin up to Barb like “yeah my friend likes your friend, you think that’d work”
Poco: O totally. And like Barb is like very not impressed with Erin’s flirting tactics to try and win her best friend’s heart. So Rose and Barb are like both their wingwomen and Dani has no idea any of this is happening.
Legend: Barb is up there making like deals and shit with Rose like “I’ll pass along the message if Erin sabotages whoever’s in first place” and Rose is like “SHIT SHE’LL DO IT”
Poco: XD Omg she would, but she would probably end up messing up and accidentally sabotaging Dani somehow.
Legend: And the whole time Rose is watching just like sweating bullets because THIS IS NOT THE PLAN and she can just feel Barb watching her with that disapproving glance practically taking fuckin notes like “well she didn’t do what I asked so Dani will never be impressed”
Legend: Barb is a master manipulator
Poco: Yes she is. And like Dan is saying like “O god this Erin girl is so annoying! why is she so mean, Barb?!” And Barb makes eye contact with Rose and says something like “I don’t know, Dani, maybe she just isn’t a very nice person.”
Legend: I love the fact that Dani is just 100% clueless to all of this and Rose is up there running like a fuckin pentagon mission with Erin trying to get this shit ON LOCK.
Legend: And the whole time, Erin is trying desperately to sabotage people and Dani is just fucking up her own game.
Poco: Ya like Dani is the only one out of the 4 actually focusing on the race, the rest of them are just focused on whether or not Erin can win Dani’s heart.
Legend: But isn’t the REAL prize the friends we made along the way?
Poco: ...suuuuuuuure it is
Poco: And Rose is just like getting sassy with EVERYONE because goddangit Erin and Barb why are you making this so hard
Legend: What if Rose and Erin fail so much that Barb is just like “alright the only possible way you can redeem yourself is if Dani wins this race” and BY SOME UNIMAGINABLE CIRCUMSTANCE Dani actually wins (by no fault of Erin’s) and she finds out about the whole flirting debacle because Barb runs up to her, congratulates her, and shoehorns in “oh yeah you’re going on a date this weekend!”
Poco: O my god yes. And Dani is just like “O MY GOD I ACTUALLY WON I DID IT I--wait what did you say Barb?”
Legend: And the whole time Barb is explaining it she won’t expressly mention WHO this mystery date is until Rose is really frantically leading a very nervous and blushy Erin over to them and Dani is like “Barb you didn’t no”
Poco: Meanwhile Erin has been like freaking about because does she look cute enough what if she totally blows this. And she is like freaking out to Rose.
Legend: This is straight up like middle school level relationship right now I’m IN LOVE
Poco: Hell yeah it is and I love it
Legend: And then Erin tries to say something and Dani is just like wide-eyed like “this is not happening. BARB YOU SOLD ME LIKE A PROSTITUTE.”
Poco: XD Omg imagine Barb says something like “Look Dani I used that pretty face of yours to our advantage”
Legend: But now think about THE ACTUAL DATE
Legend: Very awkward lesbians all dolled up trying to pretend they weren’t just yelling horrible obscenities to each other on a race track.
Poco: I will bet you anything that both Rose and Barb tail them on the date, just watching and making commentary.
Legend: They’re practically on a double date.
Poco: Also both Barb and Rose made them look super cute and Erin is like speechless when she sees Dani because o god she’s fallen THAT hard hasn’t she. Meanwhile Dani is just like “Huh Erin is actually kinda cute...”
Legend: Dani is desperately clinging to any last shred of “no I do not like her she called me a motherfucker the other day” that she has.
Poco: Exactly, while Erin is just trying to make everything go smoothly and is this going smoothly she just can’t tell???
Legend: Erin using a really cheesy pickup line that makes Dani fuckin snort though
Legend: Just like OH GOD DID YOU ACTUALLY JUST SAY THAT TO ME
Poco: Aaaaaa it’s so cute
Legend: We can’t escape the egobang my dude
Poco: Dude do we want anything to happen between Rose and Barb or should they stay just like wingwomen/kinda friends through circumstance
Legend: I mean...I can ship it...I’m down if we did that
Legend: Like they spend so long hooking their friends up they don’t even realize they grew to love each other <3
Legend: *barfs from cheesiness*
Poco: XD I say we leave it in that vague kinda are they flirting for real or just super platonic I can’t tell.
Legend: Okaaaaay fiiiiiine.
Poco: What do you want them to date, cause we can make that happen dude
Poco: We have the means to do it.
Legend: WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY
Legend: *rhythmic banging on table* RUBBERDOOP. RUBBERDOOP. RUBBERDOOP.
Poco: Ok let’s make this happen, who do you want to hit on the other more first? I like the idea that Rose will like play flirt and then Barb starts actually flirting and Rose is like wait what
Legend: Like they go to just watch Erin and Dan’s date and Barb is like “well we might as well enjoy ourselves amiright” and Rose is like “why are you making this romantic stop that”
Poco: And like Barb is a surprisingly good flirter, like she is smooth as silk.
Legend: And also super polite and romantic so like Rose is just entirely TOO FLUSTERED and constantly blushing from all the nice gestures.
Poco: And like evnetually she gets into it and starts like flirting back in like raunchy innuendos everywhere type of way
Legend: I can just imagine Barb being like “so is this where Erin gets her flirting techniques because oh my god”
Legend: Rose just crudly licking things while making terrible eye contact with Barb like “you see how good I am with my tongue”
Poco: O my god yes, like she just buys some suckers or something
Legend: Who bones first: Erin and Dani or Rose and Barb? Vote now on your phones
Poco: ....*hides phone with the Rose and Barb button pressed* I have no idea who would
Legend: Omg do you think Erin and Rose would actually be competing to see who could bone their gf first
Legend: (once the relationships are further in, of course)
Poco: O they totally would
Legend: Rose would be so blunt about it, it’d practically be a turn off in and of itself
Legend: Like “BARB PLEASE” and Barb is just like “not if you’re that desperate oh my god”
Poco: XD Ya probably
Poco: Like eventually she would learn to be smooth but it would take some time
Legend: But in the meantime, Erin and Dani are both just nervous awkward wrecks that can’t even get the courage to ask each other about it.
Poco: Ya they’re just too shy, but Erin is trying, she really is.
Legend: She can’t be smooth for shit, but SHE’S TRYING
Legend: Which is why I think Dani and Erin would end up boning before Rose and Barb
Legend: And you can fight me
Poco: I will fight you cause I still say its gonna be Rose and Barb first
Legend: Look bro I’ll start a ship war with you right here, right now, Dani and Erin would get over their awkwardness before Rose could learn how to actually be smooth
Poco: Hey who said it was Rose that was going to end up making the first move
Legend: Oh bullshit if you think Barb would do it, she probs wouldn’t even think of it
Legend: She’d hold out on purpose to teach Rose a lesson
Poco: XD maybe, but she could just get fed up and be like k I’m doing this now
Legend: You’ll see when this rant gets posted. The world with side with me.
Poco: Well probably because egobang is more popular but god dangit if I will not stay with this until I die.
Legend: It’s not about which ship is better, it’s about who bangs FIRST. This is important science.
Legend: They’re both gonna bang at some point!
Poco: IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN, THAT’S FOR CERTAIN
Legend: SO MUCH BANGING
Poco: O I didn’t know we were describing my love life here ;)
Legend: Oh my god that’s going in the plot rant just because it was so bad
@pocotippy went all the way back in our chat logs and found this!!! The first plot rant we did!! (This one’s 99% poco, though, so you know who to thank)
Poco: I think it’s a really inventive idea and has a lot of different like story opportunity. Like you could make some really good comics/fics about it. Heck if it wasn’t a game grumps AU it totally sounds like a legit cartoon plot to me.
Legend: Hahaha I mean, I could still make a cartoon if I really wanted--but yeah, it’s one of my more inventive plots I think.
Poco: Totally, plus I just really love the idea of like each of the little viruses going off on their own adventures and Brian going around trying to track them down. And like Brian gets a reputation as this mystery doctor type of thing. I could go on about my virus grumps headcanon stuff forever, dude.
Legend: What if I have forever and I want to hear all of your virus headcanons.
Poco: Dude sit down and prepare for some text spam. Ok first off, Dan has like a major sweet tooth so he ends up infecting a lot of candy shop owners and stuff (especially this one really nice candy shop lady).
Legend: I’m already into it. I might need to record this for the future.
Poco: Also since Arin infects by punching people he’ll just like climb buildings or hide under boxes like solid snake and then just jump on people liek a cat out of nowhere.
Poco: Since Barry and Arin are protective of Dan, they kinda baby him sometimes so Dan gets annoyed and he’ll like sneak out at night and explore/infect. So Arin and Barry wake up and Dan is just gone so they spend the day tracking him down.
Poco: Barry just kinda wanders around and he tries to be helpful, he really does, but it never seems to go quite right, think a series of unfortunate events type thing. Also one time Arin and Barry get caught by Brian trying to save Dan, so Dan actually has to focus and try to save them.
Poco: Whenever they get stuck in crowds and Arin gets overwhelmed Barry just kinda goes “welp” and like picks him up over his shoulder and continues on.
Poco: One time one of the viruses actually makes friends wth someone and they try really hard not to infect them.
Legend: The Barry carrying Arin one is amazing oh my god. Also them making friends ahhhh.
Poco: When they’re trying to steal food Arin is just like “ok listen, here’s the plan” and Dan is sorta listening, but mostly zoning out and while Arin is distracted with Dan, Barry just kinda walks up and takes some stuff while the shopkeeper isn’t looking and then he just goes back and continues to listen to Arin’s plan, which only works half the time.
Poco: Dan will sometimes just run around, like just run and zone out so he’ll just end up in these weird places. I really like the idea that Danny knows/has met the most people out of all the viruses.
Legend: He totally would know the most people oh my god
Poco: If Arin sees Dan or Barry shivering he’ll immediately just go up to them and start cuddling.
Poco: On time Brian loses the pills and he has to go through this whole ordeal to try and find them and then Barry/Dan find them by accident and return it to him secretly because they’re just nice dudes.
Poco: Brian is kinda like an action doctor, like he is super athletic and cool.
Poco: Dan sings and it does a thing, it could be comforting or something with his virus but I just want it to do something.
Poco: How ya liking them so far?
Legend: Oh my god, I love all of them and they’re so spot on??? Like you’re so good at this.
Legend: And for the singing thing: I imagine it would act as like a natural “immunity” (not quite that strong, but it would at least lessen) for the anxiety/depression that his virus produces.
Poco: Oooo! That’s awesome! Also I like the idea that whenever they steal from a place, Barry will go back later and leave a little apology gift.
Legend: Maybe that’s why they start stealing out of dumpsters exclusively. Barry feels too bad about stealing.
Poco: Ya Barry is too nice to do it so Arin is like “ugh fine!” and to the dumpsters they go.
Legend: And I mean, they can’t really have any kind of stomach problems so it’s not like gross/rotten food can hurt them anyway.
Legend: They just have to sustain those puny human shells, y’know?
Poco: Exactly, but they aren’t completely viruses so they still kinda prefer not spoiled food but they’re fine with the rotten stuff.
Legend: Right, right, of course. And they have their preferences (i.e. the sweet tooth on Danny that you mentioned)
Poco: Exactly. Also Dan knowing a ton of people not just in town but like everywhere cause like I said he kinda runs off on his own a lot. So like he’s actually kinda well liked by the people he’s interacted with that he didn’t infect.
Legend: Dan’s a wily one anyway. Like, he gets close to you in order to infect you, but sometimes I guess he just changes his mind and he’s like “actually nah, I’m cool with this one.”
Poco: Totally, I like the idea that Dan is like actually super competent. Like he’s awesome and stealth and he’s good with handling people and all types of stuff.
Legend: Yeah! He just gets zoned out sometimes, which actually helps when he’s trying to focus on something important because he’s DEAD FOCUSED until that thing is done.
Poco: I like the idea that in all of Brian’s files, he has them all analyzed and stuff and Dan is labelled as the most dangerous one.
Legend: I bet he is! Because Barry is totally benign. He only infects by pure chance and he’s pretty conscious of coming into contact with people. Arin is really predictable and most people run when a horned child comes running and screaming at them.
Legend: But Danny gets all up in your insecurities. He’s devious and sly. He preys on mothers and people who look lonely or trusting.
Legend: He’ll get into your head and make it so you just wanna give him a huge and then BAM infected.
Poco: But even though they get infected, Dan is still a nice guy so once in a while he will try and actually help them after he infects them so when they get cured sometimes they’re kinda grateful.
Legend: He’d especially feel bad for really intense cases because their anxiety would probably start slipping into paranoia and they’d be so depressed they wouldn’t wanna do anything. Even stuff they needed to do.
Legend: So Danny is like “Okay I’ll run those errands for you. You just stay in bed and get better.”
Poco: Exactly. Also one time the viruses find someone who’s already sick from something else so they can’t infect them, but the person is super nice and sweet to them so they purposefully lead Brian to them to make them better. And maybe Brian has the chance to grab one of them, but he realizes wha tthey’re doing so he lets them go just once.
Legend: I LOVE WHEN STOIC “VILLAINS” GIVE UP THEIR GOAL OF CAPTURING THE HERO BECAUSE THEY RECOGNIZE THAT THEY’RE DOING SOMETHING GOOD.
Legend: THE “JUST THIS ONCE” TROPE IS TO DIE FOR.
Poco: Jeez I’m rambled off a lot of things haven’t I
Legend: I enjoyed all of them, though. And we had a nice bouncing off of each other session too.
Poco: XD I’m glad you’ve enjoyed it cause I sure as hell had. Also for that just this once time Arin and Dan don’t notice, but Barry does so they just have this moment where they stare at each other and maybe Barry waves or Brian winks and then Barry runs and Brian goes to work.
@pocotippy TALKED ME INTO THIS. SO NOW IT’S A THING AND WE FLESHED OUT AN ENTIRE GODDAMN PLOT AND EVERYTHING WHOOPS.
this one is loooooooooooong.
Legend: Ahhhh stop you’re actually talking me into it.
Poco: Well that is my goal here, I love crystal grumps stuff
Legend: I KNOW SAME
Legend: ahhhhh
Poco: I mean, I love the AU alligator has with a passion but it would be cool to see your take on it, I mean I read their entire kid grumps AU stuff and I love your take on it too
Legend: I’ll do it
Legend: ON ONE CONDITION
Legend: You have to help me with it because this is important.
Poco: Well since you asked so nicely, of course I will, she says as if she wasn’t already obviously going to do that.
Legend: Lol good because this is gonna take a lot of figuring out what with all the gems and such.
Poco: Well ok, but first do ya wanna keep anything from the other AU or ya wanna start from scratch?
Legend: I think probably start from scratch. It’d just be weird to take ideas from another person’s AU.
Legend: AND I KNOW IT’S OKAY or whatever but I would feel weird about it personally.
Poco: Ya sure dude, let’s do it.
Poco: What should we figure out first, weapons, backstory, gems or what?
Legend: Let’s start with...backstory probably. The other stuff seems more like details right now.
Poco: Ok then so...I guess we name a grump and get started then
Legend: Yeah I guess. I feel like Ross would be from Homeworld. Like born and raised there, totally thinks it’s normal to hate Earth and all that.
Poco: Ya and like maybe he could kind of be like Peridot in the way that he shows up on earth for whatever reasons, starts fighting with the grumps for a while before he actually become sfriends with them.
Legend: Ross is totally like Peridot. Like he’s probably got all the latest tech and such too. Limb enhancers, communicators, all the bells and whistles.
Legend: But if he’s got limb enhancers, that means Ross is also a teeny tiny baby without them.
Poco: Yes, yes he is because that’s awesome.
Legend: Maybe Barry is like his Jasper and just used for brawn and destruction purposes
Legend: And the reason he’s so pacifistic once he joins the grumps and leaves Homeworld is because he actually has a super short temper and is REALLY strong
Poco: Ya like really strong, maybe he would go into like blind rages on Homeworld and just decimate stuff, then he feels really bad about it afterwards
Legend: But he’s trained not to contain his anger because he’s a good weapon omg
Poco: Yes! So he has to start finding ways to calm down and maybe at first he just like screams and punches something but nope that still destroys stuff.
Legend: Ohhh my goodness Barry.
Legend: Maybe he learns actually like calming techniques from Holly, who’s on earth with the rebellion and is REALLY fascinated with earth people and culture and stuff
Legend: And she teaches him how to like breathe deep and appreciate nature and silence and all that
Poco: And she like teaches him how to be gentle enough so that birds land on him and when it first happens he’s so excited!
Legend: Oh my god this is so cute. Is that even a ship? Barry and Holly? Has anyone does that before because I’m suddenly feeling it.
Legend: Barry and Holly spend a lot of time together so at first Barry thinks he can only be calm around her so he just clings to her like a puppy until she give shim the confidence to be by himself.
Poco: Ya Barry and Holly is a ship, just not a popular one. Also yes totally yes.
Poco: I gotta go eat now, I’ll be back. Leave me any ideas you have for when I get back!
Legend: Ah, explains why I’ve never seen it. I will spam you while you’re gone.
Legend: So Holly is like the friendliest gem ever and she makes friends with humans, but she also kind of treats them like something to be studied like lab rats or something.
Legend: So basically she’s really nice to them but talks to them like they’re dumb dogs.
Legend: And Suzy is like a warrior turned rogue from Homeworld so she fights for the rebellion but has so many skills that she learned fighting and all that.
Legend: But she’s also super stoic and aloof and doesn’t really like to get close to people because she thinks everyone is going to betray her/treat her badly.
Legend: Concept: Danny and Brian are fused more often than not and almost like the Garnet of the bunch because they complement each other really well and for the longest time everyone thinks Dan and Brian are just one gem and then WHOOPS THEY UNFUSED
Legend: And it takes a while for everyone to convince them that they don’t need to be fused all the time to be comfortable, but they still spend quite a lot of their time fused together
Legend: And Arin...hmmm....
Legend: Arin’s probably like the “unspoken leader” of the earth gems (who I imagine is pretty much just Suzy and Holly at first) and he wants them to really stay hidden from the world, but obviously he doesn’t really get listened to on that one.
Legend: when will you return from the war....
Legend: Dude...the Starbomb fusion....is bismuth
Legend: that is the gem they need.
Legend: It’s so gay I love it.
Legend: Okay so Suzy’s gem is definitely the cat’s eye tourmaline which is apparently super rare and also is believed to protect the wearer from negative energy and stress.
Legend: Holly is definitely a moonstone. Which is believed to help calm people and “enhance feminine energies” which is like perfect for her.
Legend: Tanzanite is literally called the stone of magic I want that to be Dan’s. Apparently it helps you “slow down and take it easy” which I think fits him pretty well lol.
Legend: And Brian is labradorite because it enhances the brain and intuition and TELEPATHY
Legend: Plus it looks cool as fuck
Legend: [link to a picture of labradorite]
Legend: look at that shit
Legend: OH SHIT THE NSP FUSION WOULD BE RAINBOW OBSIDIAN. IT’S LITERALLY CALLED THE STONE OF PLEASURE.
Legend: Also Barry is onyx because it helps release negative emotions (i.e. why he’s so easy to piss off)
Legend: Iolite enhances the imagination so I feel like that should be Arin’s, but it’s a purple stone instead of a pink one *gasp*
Legend: Ooh and calcite also enhances creativity/imagination, but it also amplifies energy so it’s like Arin x10 which is essentially Ross
Poco: Sorry it took so long, the second I finished eating my mom was like welp we’re going shopping now so oops
Legend: No prob I picked everyone’s individual gems and stuff
Poco: Yess all these gems sound awesome!
Legend: I’m not super fact checking all these gem meanings but I like the little bit I’ve read.
Poco: From what youv’e said they all fit great.
Legend: I think so! I’m really happy with how this is turning out omg I’m excited.
Poco: Ya it sounds awesome, wanna pick weapons next?
Legend: Yeah sure! Who should we start with?
Poco: Well Dan is probably the most obvious, sword all the way
Legend: I would have thought something musical but I’m down with a sword
Poco: O wait that’s true! A mic would also be good
Poco: Like he sings in it and it’s like a sonic wave type of thing
Legend: Oh shit dude a mic that he can use as like a fuckin mace (or is it a flail? who knows) and just whack people with it
Legend: OR THAT
Legend: OR BOTH
Poco: BOTH! ALSO IT CAN COMBO AS LIKE A GRAPPLING HOOK
Legend: DUDE MULTIPURPOSE MICROPHONE WEAPON
Legend: I am all down for this
Poco: Yes ok that’s his weapon!
Legend: So then Brian could have the sword because he’s a ninja and all
Poco: Ya, I always like the idea that between Dan and Brian one has like a long range weapon and the other is close up so they work perfectly as a team
Legend: Exactly! And they need to work perfectly together because they’re like always fused n shit
Poco: O is that what we’re going with in this AU?
Legend: I think I like that idea, yeah. I mean, I dunno if you managed to read all the shit I spammed you with while you were gone, but I thought of it earlier
Poco: Wait let me go back...
Legend: lol good luck
Poco: Ok I looked through it but like I have a few notes, like I don’t really think Dan and Brian should be fused so much just so that they can do their own thing a bit more, but they definitely fuse a lot in battle and stuff. Also maybe Suzy could open up to really only Arin because he liked helped her or something? Idk I’m starting to think of backstories for them
Legend: I mean, the fusion thing would just be at first. I compared them to Garnet, but just in the terms that they make a “perfect fusion” or whatever. They’ve probably grown a bit sick of each other after a while and just never unfused until someone was like “you know you don’t have to do that” and they were like “oh...right....”
Poco: Yes ok!
Poco: So let’s see...we still haven’t figured out the other weapons yet
Legend: Maybe Dan and Brian were fused so much because Homeworld MADE THEM and they forgot that they could unfuse
Legend: Also yes weapons are important
Legend: I think Holly’s should be this thing from a totally different cartoon hold on I’m gonna find a pic
Poco: O I like that Dan and Brian thing, but backstory later!
Poco: Ok I will wait
Legend: [link to a cruddy screencap from Xiaolin Showdown]
Legend: Not a great picture but these little bird things. Basically you throw them and they catch on fire and it’s AWESOME
Poco: DUDE HELL YEAH XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN!
Legend: DUDE I KNOW RIGHT I LOVE THAT SHOW
Poco: O YES RAIMUNDO IS MY BOY!
Legend: YEEEESSSSS
Poco: Ok but yes, those would be awesome for Holly
Legend: Yes, we must focus. They would definitely be sick for Holly. I can’t think of one for Suzy though, hmmmm
Legend: Arin’s should be like a spear that’s modeled after an old fountain pen though
Poco: Huh really? Never thought of a spear for Arin
Legend: What do you suggest?
Poco: Give me a sec
Legend: I was just thinking about the pen part mostly, not so much the fact that it’s a spear
Poco: Ya I’m thinking more like crossbow?
Legend: Oooh okay yes I can get behind that
Poco: Ya I just like the idea of Arin like running around yelling and shooting people.
Legend: That sounds just like him. Hopefully his aim is slightly better than it is when he plays video games
Poco: XD ya
Poco: And for Barry...A war hammer maybe?
Legend: Ooooh yes a war hammer. Like twice the size of him, even though he’s already probably super jacked.
Poco: TWICE the size?! O jeez that’s huge.
Legend: Okay that might have been a slight exaggeration
Legend: But it’s big
Poco: Yes of course
Legend: I’m glad we’ve come to this conclusion
Poco: Yes um...Maybe Suzy could have a staff?
Poco: Or a sickle
Legend: Ooh dude super dark aesthetic Suzy with a sickle it’d be like seeing the damn grim reaper. I love it.
Poco: YAY!
Legend: So now just Ross then
Poco: O DUDE I KNOW WE PRETTY MUCH ALREADY DECIDED WEAPONS BUT I REALLY WANT SOMEONE TO USE KATARS
Legend: what is a katar
Legend oh shit dude I just looked them up
Poco: I KNOW RIGHT! I LOVE THEM
Legend: What if Ross was totally unassuming and looked like a bumbling idiot and then he just PULLED OUT THOSE FUCKERS
Poco: Dude that would be awesome
Poco: Or Brian could use them
Legend: Wait which is better oh jeez. Ross or Brian.
Poco: I think I like Brian with it better. But your choice
Legend: I think Brian would use them better, yes.
Legend: So what about Ross then?
Poco: Um...He could use a chain maybe??? Or like darts/bladed darts
Legend: A chain? I dunno...I kinda like the darts idea
Poco: Ya darts would work better
Legend: Maybe poison-tipped because it’s Ross.
Poco: Ya totally, or he could have like a sling shot
Legend: A slingshot that shoots little pellets of POISON AND PAIN
Poco: YES!
Legend: I APPROVE
Poco: O wait what about Kevin?!
Legend: eh, I don’t use Kevin that often
Poco: O that’s right you don’t, ok then
Poco: Are you keeping track of this stuff?
Legend: I’ve got the gems written down, but I’m gonna have to retype everything for the plot post so
Poco: Ya well backstories need to be made! Also do we wanna give any of them special abilities? Cause those are always fun
Legend: Yes backstories! Also I don’t know, did you have something in mind, because I’m down
Poco: Ok well I really want Dan to either have healing or ice powers
Poco: Cause those just fit him well I think
Legend: Ooh let’s do healing. Especially since castle crasher!Danny already has ice powers. Healing with his singing?
Poco: Yes, let’s do that!
Legend: Beautiful I love it
Poco: Also Dan and Brian telepathically talk to each other
Legend: Oh hell yeah, Brian can totally telepath the hell out of people, especially Danny
Legend: They just stare at each other from across the room and everyone is like “GODDAMN IT JUST TALK OUT LOUD”
Poco: And like sometimes when Dan isn’t really paying attention he’ll like mumble his half of the convo under his breath and that just makes people more confused
Legend: It’s always something ridiculous like “that is not a thing you can do with a sandwich Brian”
Poco: “No Brian, no beej ever”
Legend: OH MY GOD
Poco: Oh Brian, always with the beej
Legend: Beautiful. Truly beautiful. Wanna do backstory or do you have more special power ideas?
Poco: Well I mean, I think that’s good but if ya want Holly could also like talk to animals maybe?
Legend: I’m always a sucker for Holly talking to animals
Poco: Well then let’s do it!
Poco: So let’s see...backstories. We pretty much have Ross and Barry’s...
Legend: Yup Homeworld babes that are essentially Peridot and Jasper
Poco: Yes, so now let’s figure out...Arin first since he’ll probs be the hardest
Legend: Yeah that’s true. He’s obv part of the rebellion. Probably pretty passionate about the cause.
Poco: Ya but I’m talking backstory, before the rebellion, what did Arin do. In alligator’s AU he’s a researcher
Legend: Oh you mean ALL the way back okay
Legend: I feel like he’d be like a Pearl to serve diamonds or just general higher ups
Poco: Ummm maybe...Maybe he could like handle the communications and he just hears all these reports and messages of planets dying and horrible things. So one day like an image of earth comes through and he can’t let this beautiful place go through all the horrible things he’s heard from so many other places
Legend: Oooh yeah he’s like a messanger and maybe gets used a little like a punching bag because he gives someone bad news and they just??? MUST PUNCH SOMETHING???
Poco: Yes! Like he’s a middle man for all these powerful gems.
Legend: Oh yeah, dangerous.
Legend: I think Holly was sent to earth to survey the earth/the cluster and she fell in love with the planet on her trip and just??? stayed there
Poco: Ya like she was sent there to see what useful material was there and then like maybe a bunch of birds started gathering around her work area and as she looked around she just fell more and more in love with it
Legend: Hell yes, and then she started meeting humans and was like “wow fascinating I love it”
Poco: Ok yes, and maybe Suzy was like a gem created to take on like armies by herself. But it’s really hard to make her gem so there aren’t many of them but they are SOOOOO powerful.
Legend: Yes Suzy is a super badass super soldier. And she’s powerful enough to flatten entire cities/kingdoms/everything so she has to really control her emotions and not act too dramatically so that’s why she’s so stoic
Legend: But she’s also super tiny and unassuming.
Poco: And maybe Arin ended up being like paired with her in a way? Like he was in charge of directing her on her missions and she would have like an earpiece with a direct line to him. He was the only gem that was always with her.
Legend: Awww yes. Arin talked her through like a covert mission where he had to give her information as she went and the whole time he’s telling her like “you can trust me, I’ll get you through this” to calm her down.
Poco: And eventually Suzy wouldn’t even listen to anyone else, she would only listen to what Arin told her so they had to use Arin if they wanted Suzy to do something
Legend: Arin basically gets a “promotion” because Suzy will only listen to him. And he’s like “dude this is way better than delivering bad news to military commanders with bad tempers.”
Poco: Ya, but that also comes with a bad side because now he’s hearing even more bad things and he’s even hearing the stuff Suzy is doing LIVE. And it’s even worse because he knows her and she trusts him and he has tot ell her to do all of these things.
Legend: Arin can’t take it anymore so he confronts Suzy like “do you even understand how not okay this is I can’t do this anymore” and he convinces her to run to earth with him to escape with the rebellion
Poco: And maybe when they get there, they start the rebellion but soon Holly finds them. And she’s about to report them and Suzy is about to like destroy her but Arin just starts talking and begging with Holly because he doesn’t want anyone to kill each other here. And he manages to convince her to keep them a secret and after a while she joins the rebellion.
Legend: Oh yeah totally. But like Holly is probably a shit liar so Arin has to feed her lines when she has to do reports for Homeworld. But also Holly doesn’t mention that she’s maybe been on earth a little longer than intended because she’s so in love with the planet, so she’s also kind of hiding out a little.
Legend: But also Danny and Brian are gonna be tricky. What to do with those two
Poco: O um...
Legend: Maybe they’re used as entertainment on Homeworld. Like they dance and sing for the amusement of royalty and such.
Poco: Maybe there was like a specialized attack unit that Homeworld was making, it was only made up for like 7 or 8 gems and Dan and Brian were two of them. Each of the gems were designed to do a specific role in the force. And this was all top secret stuff.
Poco: Or that too
Legend: OR BOTH
Poco: BOTH! BOTH IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER!
Poco: Like Dan and Brian were the stealth members of the team maybe?
Legend: YES. Entertainment is how they began and then someone went...”that ninja one is pretty agile and could probably fight a lot...” And Danny had the healing powers with his singing so
Legend: Yes! And they keep singing and dancing as like a coverup
Poco: They were sent with the other gems on the team on all like the top secret super dangerous missions
Legend: But also Danny and Brian are made to fuse when they go on the stealth missions because 1) they’d get recognized if they were separate and 2) Danny and Brian balance each other out really well and make it so Brian doesn’t go berserk and that Danny doesn’t “chicken out” of fighting
Poco: YES completely yes, but individually they were also considered really dangerous but they were like “let’s just see what happens if we put these two dangerous things together...”
Legend: danger + danger = ULTIMATE DANGER
Poco: YES!
Legend: I love it
Poco: Ok now how could they meet the others, I can think of two options...
Legend: Tell me
Poco: Ok well first option, the team Dan and Brian are on is sent to get rid of the rebellion, but Dan gets separated from the rest of them and meets the grumps and gets attached to them. He eventually talks Brian into joining them and they quit the team, setting up false leads where the grumps are so the other gems leave.
Poco: Or something happens on Homeworld and Dan is like “Brian no I’m not doing this anymore I just want to sing I don’t want to keep hurting people.” And Brian finds out about Earth and he and Dan escape there, basically becoming fugitives. And then they meet the grumps.
Legend: I’m more inclined to go with the second one just because I imagine them meeting the grumps while they’re fused (I’m pushing this fusion thing really hard can you tell)
Legend: Dan is just like having a mental breakdown basically and Brian is like “okay if this is what you want, I got you buddy”
Poco: O gee they fuse I couldn’t even tell (that sarcasm a little too subtle for ya?) But yes and like when they leave it sets off a lot of alarms because tot he public they were these popular well known entertainers but to the higher ups like the diamonds, they were these incredibly dangerous weapon that are noW JUST GONE WTF?!!
Legend: (It felt a little harsh tbh, I think I’m gonna cry) Literally all of Homeworld notices it, but they don’t notice fast enough for anyone to stop them because it’s basically Brian using his mad skills to just slip into nonexistence long enough to get them to earth
Poco: (Aw don’t cry muffin) Ya Dan and Brian are super sneaky and they just ninja away, of course this got a lot of people in trouble back home so there are quite a few gems with grudges against NSP.
Legend: Oh yeah definitely. It’s like Britney Spears going missing from the face of the planet. Even if you don’t like her, YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. At this point, they’re literally gem celebrities like dude
@pocotippy and I rant about loving Undertrain. Yay.
Legend: I’m also personally a fan of all of the Undertale doodles. I don’t draw them as much as I love the AU.
Poco: Dude the Undertale AU is awesome! Like evil child Ross is my life.
Legend: Especially asriel!Holly.
Legend: Dude, hell yeah I love Ross trying to coax Barry into terrible things.
Poco: Dude Holly is Asriel in the AU?
Legend: Yeah! Fluffy goat child Holly!
Legend: (But also temporarily evil flower Holly!)
Poco: My god yes!! Like aaaaa like Ross just tries again and again to get them to do bad things but it just doesn’t work.
Legend: And like it also pisses him off because Flowey!Holly used to be his best friend/partner in crime while she was evil and then Barry went and reformed her back into Asriel!Holly and NOW THEY WON’T DO EVIL THINGS WITH HIM.
Poco: And no he doesn’t like all the hugs shut up! He just wants to go back to murdering things but noooooo~ No He can only sit back and watch Barry, commenting and trying to tempt him to do bad.
Legend: He SUPER resents Barry because ROSS used to be the kid that went through all the trials and could decide how he was going to do things. And all of his hard work is just POOF gone because THIS GUY keeps mercy-ing people and won’t let Ross do what he’s been doing this whole time.
Legend: (Also it’s canon that Ross killed goat mom I’m sorry)
Poco: (O my god.) I love the idea that Ross is making as many really salty comments while Barry is doing his thing.
Legend: Oh for sure. The whole time Ross is just like “wow THIS guy is annoying, amiright? It’d probably be better for everyone if you just killed him.” And Barry is just like “Ross, that’s NOT going to work, stop it!”
Legend: Also Ross probably tries to kill Barry a couple of times.
Poco: But Barry is just like the best dodger int he world and Ross is like “wtf how do you do that?!”
once again, your now daily dose of @pocotippy and I ranting about AUs over tumblr messenger.
Poco: O hell ya King’s Quest, I really like that you made Dan and Ross a team together in it.
Legend: Everyone likes to focus on how much they get on each other’s nerves, but Danny always talks about how much he loves Ross and stuff so I thought I’d show it a little affection.
Poco: O totally and I love the idea that while Danny is actually doing all the challenges, Ross is kinda just yelling things at him from the side.
Legend: And like Ross has always been so good at King’s Quest puzzles it’s weird??? So like half the time Ross is right about whatever he tells Danny to do.
Poco: Exactly, so like Dan is more of the ‘face’ of the team and he is more physically fit while Ross is more of the brains of the operations.
Legend: But also they don’t realize that if Danny becomes a knight...Ross won’t be??? and like...they kind of only operate well as a team???
Poco: Ya but even if he wasn’t officially a knight Id on’t think Ross would ever actually leave Dan, he would always be there he just won’t care about the titles.
Legend: Of course not, but if Dan becomes a knight...he has to do important knight things that Ross wouldn’t have clearance to go with him for.
Poco: O that’s true, but I feel like whenever possible, Dan would like sneak Ross in. Or Ross would kind of just show up and Dan is like “how the hell did you get here?!”
Legend:Ross has his secret ways ;) Like Ross becomes basically a stealth master and just gets himself into places because “I KNOW Danny needs my help” but also because he misses adventuring with Danny.
Poco: Ok but that’s int he future, let’s focus on the here and now of Dan becoming a knight.
Legend: YES must focus
Poco: Ok so I know there’s been a little talk about Brian but like how about Arin and stuff. Him and Dan interacting must be great.
Legend: Lol super cock (but secretly really insecure) Arin panicking because Dan sees right through his shenanigans.
Poco: Like he’s trying to be all cool and stuff but Dan and Ross are just like “ya suuuuuure dude” so Arin kinda has it out for them a bit, like just to prove that now he is the greatest shut up you aren’t even real knight material.
Legend: Arin going super hardcore to show up this one guy WHO SHOULDN’T EVEN BE CONSIDERED COMPETITION. And Dan and Ross are just like “okay I guess we gotta take him down.”
Poco: And like he either makes fun of the fact that Dan and Ross are a team because then they aren’t actually worthy or he doesn’t even consider Ross at all he’s just like curse that Dan...O right and that one dude who always seems to show up around him.
Legend: “Dan and...other Dan.” Like they’re both just one entity to him. They’re both Dan. He’d hardly recognize them if they were apart. But together? Who are those guys? Oh, that’s Dan.
Poco: And like it annoys Ross to no end because he is here too god dang it! And maybe once like Ross and Dan split up to do something faster and Arin sees one without the other.
Legend: He’d just be like “Oh look there’s Dan” but he’d probably run into Ross and Ross would be so fed up he’d like tell him off for it just like “I HAVE A NAME. I AM A PERSON. HI, NICE TO MEET YOU. ROOOOOSSSSS.”
Legend: It’s like that one time Dan made a fake intro in the new shirt commercial. “Hey I’m Dan. I’m also Dan. Daaaaaaan.”
Poco: Exactly! And the next time Arin saw them he would immediately go back to, O it’s Dan.
Legend: Omg poor Ross. And I feel like Brian would do that too, if not only to annoy Ross. But like Barry would remember his name and Suzy would see them as separate people (although she doesn’t talk so who knows if she actually knows their names).
Poco: I feel like Brian and Ross would 100% have like this whole thing going on without Dan noticing.
Legend: Yeah because like Brian is trying to get Dan to trust him but Ross already doesn’t like him because the guy doesn’t remember his name and ALSO he’s fishy. So like Brian is constantly battling against Ross to gain Dan’s trust.
Poco: And like Ross and Brian will do the thing where they’ll like trip each other and give each other looks behind Dan’s back.
Legend: Oh my god they’re just constantly sabotaging the other to make each other look bad in front of Dan like “SEE HOW ARE YOU GONNA TRUST THIS GUY, HE WAS WRONG ABOUT A THING.”
Poco: Ya and maybe while Dan is in a competition, they have like one conversation that’s basically just we both hate each other and want Dan to be on our side, but I haven’t figured out how to get rid of you yet.
Legend: They just constantly threaten each other every chance they get but as soon as Dan walks in the room HI BEST FRIEND, YOU SEEM NICE WE SHOULD HANG OUT MORE.
Poco: TOTALLY! And Dan is just like yay I love friends and he hugs them and they do the thing where they glare at each other around Dan so he doesn’t notice. Also them just making silent threats to each other and pulling each other aside to intimidate/threaten each other.
Legend: Eventually someone like Barry or Suzy are just like telling Dan “Dude you gotta notice your two friends are TOTALLY being evil to each other eventually”
Poco: And Dan is like “What are you talking about? You guys are cool, right?” He turns around and Brian has Ross like up against the wall threatening him but the second Dan talks to them, they just put on big smiles and are like “ya we’re awesome why do you ask” and Dan turns around like “See?” and Brian immediately goes back to threatening Ross and whoever tried to tell Dan like facepalms.
Legend: Omg lol Brian literally has Ross in like a goddamn chokehold but Dan is like “haha they’re goofing around!”
Poco: What do you think would be each of the other knights’ opinions on Dan and Ross, like how would they see them?
Legend: Well I know Suzy’s is definitely heavily based on the new game as Achaka. So like she’s really unimpressed at first because she’s like “he doesn’t have what it takes” but she’s not rude or anything (unless you count being mute as being rude). But then they get to know each other and she’s like “oh okay he cool.”
Legend: Barry is immeidately won over because Dan and Ross are really good dudes and aren’t mean to him even though they’re competing.
Legend: And Arin totally dismisses them at firs,t not even really caring about who they are as people (explaining why they’re both just Dan) until he needs their help, then he’s like “ohhh they’re awesome.”
Legend: And Brian just wants to use them to his own advantage and I don’t think Ross is gonna trust any reform from this guy so that probably doesn’t go anywhere.
Poco: O totally, and also Dan actually having some really cool moments in this AU.
I went on a long car ride and @pocotippy kept me entertained by fleshing out the Kid Icarus AU with me. She’s a delight, isn’t she?
Legend: Uhhh kind of in the same vein, Froggie ( @froggiekirby10 whaaaat shoutout) suggested a Kid Icarus AU, which I’ve just been using as an angel AU but pretty much the same tbh.
Legend: And like fallen angel Danny and light, pure angel Arin falling for each other and Danny trying to corrupt him a bit, but not knowing it’d probably ruin everything Arin’s ever had/loved.
Poco: What do you mean by corrupt him
Legend: I mean, not intentionally, but Danny’s had a taste of the “wild side” so now Arin’s life is uptight and full of rules and regulations and schedules so Danny wants him to just have some fun.
Legend: But he doesn’t realize that’ll ALSO make Arin a fallen angel which Arin doesn’t want.
Poco: What happens when you become a fallen angel
Legend: The only fallen angel I’ve really heard stories about is Lucifer soooo...you can probably glean some things from that.
Legend: But like Lucifer wasn’t even super bad he just didn’t follow rules?
Poco: Exactly and he never forces anyone to do anything he just offers deals and options.
Legend: Yeah so basically Dan is like that. He’s not BAD, but he’s not pure enough to be considered an angel by whatever deity leads that shit.
Poco: Sounds coolio, but wouldn’t that just make him like a nice demon? Or like...
Legend: I’m pretty sure fallen angel is just a nice way of saying demon so yeah. Point being he USED to be an angel.
Poco: Ok just going to say now I love all things demon Danny so this AU just like skyrocketed up in awesomeness for me.
Legend: Dude I want him to look like he does in the cookies video with black angel wings.
Poco: YES!!! omg yess, now let’s see...how would him and Arin meet...
Poco: I mean, maybe Arin could be put in charge of making sure Dan doesn’t get in to much trouble or something.
Legend: I think maybe--and let me know if I’m getting too angsty--Danny maybe gets homesick and so he goes back to like check on his family and Arin catches him and is like “I have to turn you in you can’t be here.”
Legend: But Danny panics and like kidnaps Arin but NOT WITH BAD INTENTIONS he just doesn’t wanna be punished.
Legend: But you can like “smell” (or like “feel”) the darkness off a person and it starts to rub off on Arin so it’s like getting home late smelling like alcohol to the people around there.
Poco: YES!! YES YES YES! And while he’s ‘kidnapped’ Arin starts talking with Dan and he’s like hey this dude isn’t so bad so he agress to come back and visit Dan and such.
Legend: But of course that makes the whole darkness thing worse and maybe Arin finds like a black feather in his wings and it’s like “this is everything I’ve ever known I can’t lose this” so he refuses to see Dan again for a while.
Poco: And Danny just doesn’t understand because Arin was like the only angel that didn’t seem to hate him.
Legend: We have to figure out if there’s a way for them both to be happy or one of them has to give in to the other’s side.
Poco: So basically choose whether we want there to be fluffyness or more angst.
Legend: Yeah, well also, if it’s fluffy, then we have to figure out how to compromise while not changing an entire society’s point of view for our Romeo and Juliet. Because that seems like a cop-out to me.
Poco: O totally um...maybe there could be like a trial type thing. Like they have to prove themselves and prove that one isn’t just manipulating the other. Or maybe the top angel or something could be one of their old friends that they let slip away so they can both be happy.
Legend: Hmmm well Danny isn’t a super bad guy, so maybe he had to do like trustworthiness trials. I feel like Satan is fine with anything pretty much so Arin doesn’t need approval from him, but Danny needs the favor of the angels. So like he has to do like “probation” just to get visiting rights to hang out with Arin.
Poco: Ya that sounds cool, I also love the idea that Satan is like the chillest most fun dude ever.
Legend: Dude, I’m sure Dan takes Arin down there and shows him around and Satan is like “sup dudes yo, Dan is that ur bf? Nice. Anyway, I gotta go show a new person around. She had sex before marriage. I know, another one of them. She’s totally cool.”
Poco: Omg Danny and Satan have one of those bro secret handshake things.
Legend: Hahaha they totally would for sure. Arin is just flabbergasted because “um THAT’S LUCIFER” but he finds out he’s cool and he accidentally mentions something at home like his parents are cursing Satan or whatever and he’s like “maybe he’s just like misunderstood.”
Legend: And they’re just like “WE DIDN’T RAISE YOU THIS WAY WHAT ARE YOU SAYING.”
Poco: XD omg totally he would and like there’s a bunch of mean rumors about Satan and the fallen agnels but they’re just like “the angels are cool, a little stuck up but whatevs.”
Legend: Some of the fallen ones aren’t super cool but yeah, the majority is just like “yeah for some reason they didn’t like that I was gay/sexually active/didn’t go to church? But whatever some of them were pretty nice.” and Arin starts realizing that all of these “sins” are actually kind of irrelevant.
Poco: Yes, ok I am loving all of this. Also should like the angels and fallen angels have like powers?
Legend: I’m sure they have some kind of powers like flight obv. And since it’s technically Kid Icarus I’m sure Arin’s got some magic arrows/bow. Also Dan can like poof things into/out of his grasp and stuff. But like small reasonable things. And if he concentrates really hard he can poof himself places.
Poco: Ok sounds cool. The usual powers for fallen angels/demons are usually like just being super persuasive and the contract obviously but this is a Kid Icarus AU I guess...I mean neither of us know anything about Kid Icarus so that may be an issue.
Legend: Lol true but it’s a LOOSE AU. I like the persuasion thing though omg.
Poco: Ya like Dan if he really wants to can talk you into almost anything.
Legend: Arin probably doesn’t know this because I feel like he’s real sheltered. So Dan uses it just to like calm him down after the kidnapping and Arin is like “whoa I am suddenly calm.”
Poco: Ya poor lil sheltered Arin is learning all these new things.
Legend: He’s probably constantly overwhelmed by shit like “what do you mean guys can like guys that never even registered as a thing that could happen” and “are you telling me the word ‘fuck’ doesn’t actually magically rip a year off your life every time you say it what” and shit like that.
Poco: Totally...Also how much egobang we want to put in here?
Legend: Dude this is like 100% egobang already.
Poco: Sweet well then can I just suggest that the reason Arin found that black feather in his wing was because he and Dan kissed for the first time.
Legend: OH SHIT YES YOU CAN SUGGEST THAT.
Legend: But also...after that kiss...Dan finding a white feather in his wings...
Legend: By the end of this I imagine them becoming like...halflings. Like they’re wings have equal parts black and white feathers because their love is pure and sweet but their means were “tainted” by angel standards.
Poco: yes this is it. That is what is happening.
Legend: Also...*cough*demon!suzy and ross*cough*
Legend: *cough*angel!holly and barry*cough*
Poco: Huh demon!Suzy interesting. Suzy is usually an angel in most AUs I’ve seen.
Legend: Really? I mean, I’m not saying she’s evil but like...that aesthetic.
Poco: Yeah, but Arin is usually an angel and Suzy is usually either his wife or best friend int he AUs so of course she would be an angel. Plus, she is super nice.
Legend: [Taylor Swift’s Wildest Dream] Also this just came on the radio and I think it’s appropriate
Poco: This is very appropriate yes, this is Arin’s POV totally.
