in honor of my Jack Wilder/Annie Edison crackship, some cursed combos between the Greendale Seven and the Horsemen:
Jeff Winger and J. Daniel Atlas. They would HATE each other. They’re too similar, they would drive each other up the wall with their combined pretentious freakism.
Britta Perry and Merritt McKinney. Britta’s a big fan of the Horsemen as an anti-capitalist group. But she definitely thinks she can match Merritt’s Mentalism with her psychology degree. She cannot. He clocks her instantly.
Abed Nadir and Lula May. Pop culture nerds. They’re geeking out together. Abed walks out of that room knowing 27 more magic tricks than he did before (0) and new ways to use SFX makeup and props to scare people. The Greendale Seven live in fear from now on.
Troy Barnes and Jack Wilder. Their shared minor-level frat boy adjacency and whimsy for the world is DANGEROUS. Annie WILL end up third wheeling.
Pierce Hawthorne and Merritt McKinney. Pierce is dead by the time Annie and Jack meet but if he wasn’t! Merritt would have so much fun ragebaiting him. Unfortunately, while Pierce is easily ragebaited, he is also delusional and dense. Unstoppable force vs immovable object type shit.
Shirley Bennett and the Ponies. Shirley can’t stand them. The exasperation Merritt and Atlas had for the Ponies’ general apathy is multiplied by ten here. Bonus points for if they’re in a polyamorous relationship (or if you believe in lesbian June + vanderoy). Shirley would actually pass out.
Jeff Winger and Jack Wilder. Jeff hates Jack with a loathing passion. He can’t stand losing in a charm/looks competition that he made up in his head. Jack tries to play nice for Annie, but he’s Merritt’s protege (son) first and foremost, and can’t help but ragebait and make it worse.
Britta Perry and Lula May. They should make out.
Merritt McKinney and Shirley Bennett. I can definitely see him trying to hit on her and then her almost falling for it. And then he tries his Mentalism on her and it pisses her off (as he usually does).
Abed Nadir and J. Daniel Atlas. They have an autism off. 38 dead, 76 wounded.
Henley’s not here because she’s weirdly self actualized 🤚 she chills with Annie while this all unfolds (blows up)
