#poor kaidan

[bluemoon-golden]

I always feel so bad when I take Alenko with me on missions.. poor guy already has debilitating migraines and on top of that he has to suffer my terrible driving

[popconfession]

Really wish they’d done some tweaking of the relationship flag and dialogue trees. I have not spoken to Kaidan once this playthrough, just to avoid triggering or a romance or having to be an asshole to him, and Liara is STILL worried that I’m dating him.

It is 2021, cancel the relentless heteronormativity already Bioware.

[theoriginalladya]

Floating WIP

I was tagged by @painterofhorizons for this.  Thank you!!! <3   Anyone else have a WIP to share?  Consider yourself tagged and tag me back so I can see it as well, please!

Let me see...  let’s try a bit of Lachlan Shepard this time.  This is set on Eden Prime, but varies from the game.  Kaidan Alenko is the only one left from his squad and he runs into Ashley Williams and someone unexpected ...

~~~

The battle that ensues is bizarre by any Alliance standards.  Walking, ‘talking,’ flashlights armed with assault rifles?  What the hell?  Kaidan falls back on technical attacks as much as possible, supplemented by his pistol. His companion unloads their assault rifle into the same one, however, and within seconds the first is brought down. Before they can turn to deal with the second, a loud bellowing roaring cry crosses the clearing … in a language all too familiar to Kaidan’s ears.  Dumbfounded, he stares in disbelief as a human in black armor, marked with two white stripes to either side of a red one on his right arm, flies in from above.  His arrival surprises all three of them – Kaidan, the marine and the walking flashlight – giving the newcomer an advantage, and the enemy is soon dealt with.  

It takes a second or two for the rush of adrenaline to settle at which point Kaidan glances over at the marine next to him, catching her attention in the process.  “You okay?”

She nods, breath raspy as she tries to calm. “Y-yes, sir!”

“Good.  Stay here, I’ll be right back.”  He heads over to the other soldier now standing over the dead flashlight, but his interest is less medical than incredulity when he arrives.  “Sgurr Uaran?  Really?”

Lachlan Shepard returns his rifle to his loadout harness with a casual shrug, but his usual engaging smile is firmly in place. “What else do you expect a MacRae to shout in the heat of battle?”

“Maybe nothing?”  Kaidan rolls his eyes, assured that the man is all right despite his unexpected arrival on the scene and starts walking back to the marine. Lachlan follows.  “I mean, you were trying to be stealthy, weren’t you?”

The faintest hint of amusement frames the reply. “Do you really want an answer to that?”

Kaidan sighs.  “As hard as you are on my sanity?  Probably not.”

[halapenojalapeno]

Skinny Love.

Kaidan was sitting in the café on the Citadel when an unpleasant thought wormed its’ way into his head. He realised that, despite it coming as quite the shock, he probably should have known. He drummed his fingers on the table with one hand while using the other to quietly sip his drink, grateful that he’d managed to avoid the lunchtime crowds. Where was Shepard? He was not generally an impatient man, but the longer she took the longer he would have to ruminate on the events that had past.

He had noticed within hours of being in her presence as they prepared for the Mars mission that Shepard’s behaviour towards him was markedly different. She was still as unfathomably kind to him as she’d always been, despite his harsh attitude towards her. She had the same warm demeanour towards him as she’d always had, as if he had left her crew for a few days rather than a few years. Yet, there was no questioning that something had changed. She no longer reached out to touch him, whether it was to brush against his arm, a gentle squeeze of his fingers, or to feel his arm round her shoulders. She had told him once in confidence that she did it because on Earth she’d never had anyone precious to her and she wanted to know he was close, in a conversation that felt like it was lifetimes ago.

The mission itself ended in disaster for Kaidan as he was gravely injured, but the coming weeks of recovery provided him with a moment of clarity. Why in all the galaxies had he been acting like such a colossal prat? His thoughts floated back to Horizon, where it all went wrong. “I loved you!” He spat it out to her in the past tense, as if he could ever get past his feelings for her. Shepard had implored, she pleaded with him to just try to see it from her side, but in the heat of the moment he’d decided that she wasn’t trustworthy. Instead he flipped it round to insinuate that Shepard was the one that was blind. “They can decide if they believe your story,” the thinly veiled insult hit its mark and Kaidan had to grit his teeth to stop himself from grimacing at the hurt on Shepard’s face. It was clear she knew what Kaidan had meant to say was ‘I don’t believe a word you have said.’ Still she tried again for him, one more time: “I could use someone like you on my crew Kaidan, it’d be just like old times,” She spoke tentatively, and he had understood she was asking for more than just another crew member. “No it won’t; I’ll never work for Cerberus.” He replied forcefully. “Goodbye Shepard.” He hadn’t meant for it to be the end, despite the fact he was the one that said goodbye. It was all a bit of a mess after that, Kaidan mused, sliding the lump of ice from his glass into his mouth. He thought about the shaky correspondence he sent to Shepard that was intended to rectify his mistake, to show he hadn’t meant to end it. It was too late, though, and a few months later a letter was delivered to his door written in her chunky, slightly slanted handwriting. Then another. Then another. By the fourth he’d all but worked out what it was that could possibly be so important it warranted the effort of handwritten letters. After all, he knew Shepard and she would want to soften the blow as much as possible and if it couldn’t be in person then the most personal method available to her would have to do even if she struggled with it – being able to read and write weren’t really a priority for her when she was growing up on Earth’s back streets. He didn’t read them for he was sure that the whoever had caught Shepard’s eye would be talked about in them and he couldn’t bear to look. So, he buried himself in his work in a pathetic attempt to hide from any mention of her name and, to be fair, it was paying off; he even got promoted to Major. Until the whole galaxy went to shit with the arrival of the frickin Reapers. So they were together again and yet not for the mission to Mars and then, stuck in a hospital bed, Kaidan couldn’t avoid the information he was so desperately hiding from. The nurses were gossiping about Shepard’s exploits on one of Palaven’s moons – shooting Husks and Marauders, saving the Primarch, basically kicking ass like always… and afterwards, sharing a passionate moment with Garrus Vakarian. This was the truth, Kaidan thought as he waved over the waiter to order another drink, that he he should’ve known. Garrus and Shepard were always close, and had Garrus not been a turian maybe Kaidan would’ve had to tell him to back off. As it was, “Shepard and Vakarian are the one true pairing of the Normandy” was the most popular joke during those precious moments of peace and laughter while trying to stop Saren, despite both their protests to the contrary. Still, the news stunned Kaidan; betrayed, not only being cheated on by his love but she had done so with his friend. Of course, that wasn’t exactly true – knowing Garrus he wouldn’t allow a relationship with someone if they were romantically entangled elsewhere – but it was an easier truth than that of the letters Kaidan refused to read. The news helped Kaidan finally plucked up the courage to ask Shepard about fixing their relationship, so he sent her an email to ask her to visit. Naturally she came as soon as she read it, but as she walked in wearing a look of concern while trying her hardest not to look haggard, her back straight and hands held behind her back in military style, Kaidan lost the nerve. Yes, this woman was the real Shepard, but times had changed and so had she. He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time in years and he could see the worry and the stress and the fraying nerves written all over it. He was not going to be the one to make an already gruelling situation worse. Not this time. Kaidan was going to trust Shepard, he was going to believe her, and he proved it in the situation with Udina on the Citadel. He was not going to have another Horizon. He supported Shepard like he should have done the first time around, and stood down when she asked him to. Perhaps there is still a chance, a little voice in his head had mused, but he crushed it, reminding himself that Garrus was stood by her side when Shepard confronted him, possibly ready to shoot Kaidan down to protect her. Once he’d joined the crew again he could see how happy Garrus made her, much as it pained him to admit it. When Kaidan was with Shepard she seemed to glow, but with Vakarian she positively sparkled. Kaidan watched dumbfounded as Shepard was pushed from one precarious situation to the next, like Rannoch and Thessia, and when it seemed like she was about to break Garrus would wrap an arm around her, pressing his head against Shepard’s and the tension would melt out of her. She’d peck him and gently whisper secret loving words to him and when she pulled away the deep-set lines of worry in her face would have eased. It was for that reason that Kaidan ignored the burning ache in his chest at the sight of them. He did have one very awkward conversation about the situation on Garrus’s insistence which resulted in him punching the Turian squarely in the mandibles, but after that he held on to no real resentment toward him. Losing Shepard was altogether of Kaidan’s own doing. Kaidan was snapped out of his thoughts by the sight of Shepard walking towards him. She was dressed in civvies, an N7 jumper and some sporty leggings, and had her blazing red hair tied into a messy ponytail. He shook his head as if doing so would dislodge the memories he was just reliving, regretting it instantly as his implant created dull spikes of pain in response. He grabbed a menu as she dumped herself into the nearest chair. “Hey, Kaidan. Went for a quick run first, you know, fire up the appetite,” She flashed him a cheeky grin and scooted her chair round to peek over his menu. “I’m surprised this place can still get supplies for a menu like this,” he murmured, pretending not to notice the proximity. “Maybe it’s better not to ask,” Shepard laughed heartily, a sound that was becoming scarce as the battles raged. Kaidan considered telling her that he had never stopped loving her, that he was still waiting for her, that Horizon was a horrible mistake… but what would be the point? All that would happen was that Shepard would stop enjoying herself, stop being able to laugh with him.

Once again, Kaidan lost the nerve.

[spacesquirrel]

Wish I may, wish I might, bring you back to me tonight. ✨💔 For the May @meflashfanwork, “What Might Have Been”.

SORRY FAM. Everything I touch turns to angst.

And while not written for this, I do think this art lines up very nicely with my old (first ever!) ME fic, "Promises".

At least, that’s what I keep telling myself to avoid writing a drabble to match this rn when I should be focusing on my MEBB plot. 😓

[husband-steve-cortez]

I should say Kaidan knew getting into this he wouldn't be Miles' first priority but he sometimes wishes he could be.

Steve never expected to be a priority to Commander Shepard but he ends up becoming his #1 concern.

[lyrishadow]

mass effect question:

Is there a mod to remove the terrible light that sits over Kaidan on the Normandy SR1 because.. its killing me.. giving ME a headache (imagination say it MUST not be helping him?)

[siirensung]

crdered replied to your video: hi i recorded this on my phone and couldn’t figure...

YOURE THE CUTEST PERSON ON THE PLANET

IN A TIE WITH HOW CUTE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY

allianceofficer replied to your video: hi i recorded this on my phone and couldn’t figure...

you: “he’s gonna draw all the gunfire to himself–” kaidan: “NOT WITHOUT A FUCKIN BARRIER UR SURE AS SHIT NOT”

allianceofficer replied to yourvideo: hi i recorded this on my phone and couldn’t figure...

i cannot believe that i have been?? so blessed?? in every way??

nate: there’s an entire crowd of geth shock troopers and rocket launchers and also some mechs and husks nate: i’m gonna run at them, k? k kaidan: !!!!!!!!!!!!! nO??????!!!!!

lord help kaidan protect his reckless soldier