You can take a break if you just tell me that it hurts.
He has to find him. He has to help, to make up for it! He has to- has to do something!
"Ienzo."
He can't stop until he finds Sora. No matter how many sleepless nights he has, he can't. Stop. Until he finds Sora.
"Ienzo!"
The nightmares over what he did are bad enough -- the dreams, memories even, of helping Xehanort with his 'experiments', the tricks he'd played on Riku in Castle Oblivion.
He'd already brought Naminé back. Already apologized so severely to her. Now, to make it up to Riku and Sora, he has to find the latter.
"Hey!"
Hands grab him and pull him away from the computer, leaving him blinking at the blurry shape of Even.
"Oh. Hello, Even."
Even gives a long sigh, not letting go of Ienzo.
How long have you been searching?"
"I- I'm not sure, I think.. I think only a couple of hours?"
"...It's noon."
"Ah, well I started at nine, so-"
"No, Ienzo, it's noon of the next day. You've been in here for 27 hours, Ienzo. Let's go."
"Wait- but-"
Even pulls him along, the younger man stumbling over himself. Since when had he gotten so hungry? ...When was it he slept last? He was always told that staring at computers would hurt one's eyes....
The next time he opens his eyes, he's in his bedroom, a cold bowl of soup on the nightstand next to him.
Finally polished up this very old WIP doodle of Xion, Roxas, and Axel encountering a weird bug (Cladonata apicalis)
It started out as me brain storming fun outfits for Roxas and Xion, but then I started giving them all more interesting poses (mostly spongegar adjacent), and I ended up with this scene
I kind of feel like, maybe Xion would like bugs. After all, each bug no matter how plain or difficult to distinguish from other similar looking bugs, is it's own weird little guy/gal. and I also I just kind of feel like if she and Roxas encountered a bug, they would have a bit of a 'wow look at that!' moment together c: maybe even collect bugs they encounter to show each other, kind of like they do with the shells! I also may or may not gravitate towards making characters like bugs because I like bugs haha
Roxas's outfit is based on the fish-themed lamp in his room in the digital Twilight Town (it's presence makes me wonder, if maybe it was put there because it's the sort of decor Roxas would like), and his desire to go to the beach with his friends; so, ocean themed!
and Axel is just Axel with his usual black coat because APPARENTLY, this is just what his fashion sense is it seems.
He’s not sure what possessed him to ask that question. He knows that this is a delicate topic, and that what she went through still haunts her, just like his time as Xehanort’s vessel still haunts him.
To his surprise, though, Aqua actually answers him.
‘Cold,’ she murmurs. ‘Dark. Terrifying.’ She shivers and tightens her grip on his hand. ‘It sucks all the light out of you, if you stay there long enough. I couldn’t sleep, or eat, or do anything except walk and fight Heartless. And lonely. I missed you and Ven and the master all the time. Sometimes I saw you and Ven there, but you were just illusions that faded away when I got too close. I… I could have died. Sometimes I wanted to die, but you and Ven always stopped me.’
‘I’m sorry,’ he says. Sorry for dredging up bad memories. Sorry for everything he did that led her to her fate.
‘Don’t be,’ Aqua says, squeezing his hand. ‘It wasn’t your fault.’
‘No?’ He looks at her skeptically. If it weren’t for him stupidly falling for Xehanort’s tricks and succumbing to darkness, Aqua would never have been put in that position in the first place. How can it not be his fault?
‘It was my choice,’ Aqua says firmly. ‘I’d do it again if I had to.’
He hates knowing that she’s right. That she willingly sacrificed herself for him, when she could have saved herself and let him sink into the darkness. Yeah, he would’ve been lost, maybe for good, but at least Xehanort would’ve been trapped. And he wouldn’t have had to be aware of Xehanort using his body for his evil plans.
He doesn’t go into that, though. It’d only end with them arguing and Aqua insisting that she could never leave him like that, not even for the greater good.
‘I know,’ he says instead. ‘Thanks,’ he adds. ‘For… doing that.’
He means it. Not that he likes that it resulted in her exile in darkness and the almost breakage of her sanity, but appreciates the thought behind her choice. That she loved him enough to brave that hell to save him.
Aqua smiles slightly and breathes out, ‘You’re welcome.’
‘I never thanked you, Terra.’
Aqua’s startlingly-loud voice jolts him out of a light doze. He opens his eyes to find Aqua gazing at him expectantly, as if waiting for him to say something.
‘Hmmm?’
‘You guided me,’ Aqua says softly. ‘In the Realm of Darkness.’
He looks away. ‘It was Namine,’ he tells her. ‘She’s the one who convinced me to find you. To help you.’ He swallows hard. ‘It’s her you should be thanking.’
‘You still came,’ she responds. ‘In Enchanted Dominion and later, at the Dark Margin. It was your heart, and Ven’s too, that helped guide me to Destiny Islands and stopped me from drowning. That helped me break through the wall between the Realm of Nothingness and the Realm of Light. So… thank you.’
‘Ah… you’re welcome.’
‘And… thank you for tonight. For being there for me.’
He keeps his eyes away from her beautiful blue eyes, lest they wreck him completely. Instead he keeps his gaze locked on their joined hands.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
summary: When Roxas said that Riku had "a surprise for you" and that it was "surprisingly not the worst thing ever," Sora didn't know what to expect. The Twilight Town greenhouse certainly wasn't on that list. (for your listening pleasure, some relevant m m @ t a)
notes: for the record, I blame multiple people for this. you know who you are. (also, this was nanoseconds away from being titled "a thymely realization" because I have terrible pun ideas.) soriku, G, post-canon because of course riku and kairi drag sora back from death or quadratum or whatever (and when I mean riku and kairi I mean both of them nomura). 3900 words
For some reason my rough draft has this bizarre title. Probably doesn't make a whole lotta sense...but it is oddly fitting for what this fic is about. With that said, enjoy this brief look into it!
*****
“Do any of you remember Tron? The security program that Sora aided to destroy the previous MCP?”
Donald and Goofy’s eyes lit up. “Tron???”
Ienzo stifled a laugh. “Well, that answers my question. And don’t worry; he still remembers the two of you quite fondly.”
“Aw, shucks.” Goofy chortled. “That’s real nice of him!”
"As for why I'm bringing him up..." Ienzo approached Ansem’s computer and began typing in a set of commands.
"While Cid and Leon were converting Organization XIII into data for the digital version of Sora to fight, I quietly worked on running maintenance for Radiant Garden's security system. At some point, I decided to update all of Tron's capabilities. Being the new Master Control Program, I had to ensure that his programming could keep up with any tweaks I made to the town's defense protocol."
Goofy and Donald gave him a blank stare. Ienzo sighed.
"...In short, he got a new look to match with his new skills."
"Ohh..." Donald and Goofy nodded in understanding.
“How about I just show you?” Ienzo pressed the enter button on the keyboard. After a few seconds, Tron’s face popped up on screen. The program appeared to be disoriented by it.
"Ienzo? Master Ansem? Why am I..." Tron's eyes drifted over to Donald and Goofy. He smiled once he saw those two friendly faces.
“Donald! Goofy!”
"Tron!" The pair rushed over to the computer, gawking at the screen.
“It’s so nice to see you both again!” Tron said. He frowned a little as he looked between them.
“...Hey, where’s Sora? Isn’t he usually with you?”
Goofy and Donald’s eyes widened. They exchanged a distressed look.
“Well, um...” Goofy took off his hat. “He’s...”
“Off on an errand for the king!” Donald interrupted. “It’s a very important task that he has to...face on his own.”
“Donald...” Goofy whispered.
The mage shook his head aggressively, placing his index finger on his beak. Goofy slowly nodded, picking up on Donald’s silent plea to break the news to Tron later. Mickey sighed, giving his friends a sympathetic look.
Goofy cleared his throat, placing his hat back on his head. “...That’s right. So don’t you worry; Sora will be okay.”
Donald nodded in agreement, clenching his quivering hands below the computer screen.
Ven hates it when aqua treats him like a kid. It reminds him of when xehanort first split his heart. He doesn't ever want to feel that way again so sometimes he goes a little overboard on training. Some days terra has to literally throw him over his shoulder to get him to take breaks.
It’s even worse now, isn’t it? Because the small children he’d seen before weren’t children anymore. They were his age. One of them was his age and a master. Sora, baby Sora, had learned skills Ventus didn’t have, had been through more, seen more, lived more, than he had. And there’s another guy who’s replaced Ventus, who can wield two keyblades and has a history with these people, these people who Ventus had known far before them but had been separate from all their lives.
He doesn’t fit anymore. Everyone else has surpassed him, even the kids. He isn’t needed. He has no place. Shunted to the side, not quite part of the group, but included because they’re supposed to be there, they were supposed to be important to these peoples’ lives.
And then Aqua treats him like a child, and it’s all he can do not to scream.
Sometimes he’s not even the only one. Sometimes Terra, also not a master, has to tear into something, beat something up, because the protege he was supposed to train surpassed him long before he could ever help guide Riku forward. They were both gone, and they’d both ended up being forgotten.
But sometimes, when Terra’s muscles are aching and burning beneath his skin, he would turn and find Ventus still pressing on, his face cherry red, his mouth open to suck in gasps so hot they had to freeze his throat, sweat rolling down his back as his lips turned chapped from lack of water. And he pushes away his own pain and frustration and goes to Ven’s side. One hand on Ven’s shoulder, and the instant Ven stops, he nearly collapses.
Terra picks him up, happy to hurt his own muscles a little longer. He doesn’t bother speaking, ignores Ven’s breathless complaints. He takes Ven to the shower, and they’re too tired to care about propriety or even, sometimes, about their clothes. They stand under the spray until their sweat doesn’t feel like it’s forming a new lines of skin, and then they collapse on the nearest sofa and sleep curled up together, careful of their bruised muscles.
Sometimes they wake up and do it all over again. Sometimes they play video games. Sometimes they sit at the breakfast table in silence, Aqua nervously looking between the two of them, not certain what’s wrong or how to help, but afraid something she might say or do could rush them back out to that training ground. Sometimes, very rarely, they sit in the middle of the throne room. Sometimes Aqua joins them, and they all stare at the thrones as if they were miles away, pictures on a screen.
My idea for a Kingdom Hearts IV–that will eventually have all that entails, like Shibuya and Verum Rex and Sora’s PoV–but that deals with the idea of a dark Kairi after everything she’s been through, because this girl deserves to be allowed to feel things. First chapter is from the TV show “Angel the Series”–as it’s Fox and Disney owns Fox now–but you don’t have to know Angel to get it.
Madness
Surprisingly enough, it hadn’t been Kairi’s idea for her to train like it was the only thing she had left in the world. It had been Riku’s—as many things in her and Sora’s life had started out with him—as he had thought that she should actually try and do something and have less reason to hate herself that way.
“But is that… really a good idea?” Kairi had asked him when he’d suggested it, as she’d sat on the paopu tree—the stupid place she had lost Sora at—and worked on making more lucky charms for him and letters, on the off-chance that one of them would work and bring her boy back to her. “Riku… maybe I just was never cut out for fighting. Sora paid a high price in bringing me back. Do you really think I should dishonor his sacrifice by putting myself into even more danger that I can’t handle?”
Riku had looked like he wanted to push Kairi into the water beneath them then—and honestly, she could have hardly blamed him even if he had; she’d been so weak then, and she was ashamed to think of it now—and got right into her face as he said, “That’s not the girl who said she wanted to fight like me and Sora, so we wouldn’t be the only ones getting hurt… or who said that she was tired of getting left behind and that ‘wherever one of us goes, the other follows’. Kairi… you made all of these promises to Sora before the Keyblade Graveyard. Do you really want to go back on them now?”
No, she hadn’t. That was the last thing in the world that she would have ever wanted. But the person she’d been a few months ago—who had said so much of that stuff—was so different from the girl she was now. That Kairi had gotten a Keyblade into her hand for the first time and had thought that with just a little training, she would easily become as strong as Sora and Riku were. That wasn’t the part of her that had gotten training and still couldn’t get her body to cooperate… and had had to realize that most of her worst nightmares might actually come true, as Terra-Xehanort had charged at her.
And they had come true after that. Oh, how they had. Kairi had had one brief moment of peace and pride in herself—when she had kept Sora from fading away, that had then allowed him to save everyone else—but then it had all gone to hell, like so much of Kairi’s life had, and she didn’t know if she wanted to go there again.
“Kairi, the problem is we had you train with someone who isn’t a Keyblade wielder at all… And is actually someone who uses his magic to stay away from enemies, when you—in pretty much using a sword—would be in close contact with people. That was our fault, not yours… I’ll properly train you now, so you never have to feel so horrible again. Just let me.”
And that was what started it. Many hours a day—eight or more, as if they were working a full-time job and in Kairi’s eyes they were—Riku was training Kairi in the hours that they weren’t looking for any hint as to Sora’s whereabouts. And while it started out rough, and Kairi had continued to think that maybe she should just work on her light magic because of it, she steadily got better and better and even she could see it—it was nothing like what she had encountered with Merlin and Lea. It was actual tangible progress that she could see in her scars and feel in her muscles. And Kairi took it even further than that.
She didn’t tell Riku or anyone about this because she didn’t want to worry them, but in the hours when she should have been sleeping or resting, she would do the familiar drills again until they were completely beaten into her. And then she was taking the gummi ship that Mickey had thankfully left for her and Riku out into the ocean between worlds, to find Heartless or Nobodies to fight: something that didn’t help her that much, because Kairi had been able to handle these just fine in the Keyblade War, but every little bit of actual experience helped.
And she’d just hoped against hope that on her journeys she could run into some Darksides or Twilight Thorns, and how happy she was—the first time she’d been remotely that in ages—when she did, and began handling them better and better: with little injuries and destruction to her hair and outfits.
And at one point—when Kairi had unintentionally taken a page out of Roxas, Xion, and Lea’s book—and had bested five giant Heartless in one night, she had finally felt good about herself… and that nothing could ever happen to her again. She wouldn’t let it. And that furthermore, she knew that she was going to find Sora and bring him home.
But it was just when she was beginning to feel great, that such a feeling of euphoria didn’t last.
Kairi heard a Corridor of Darkness open from behind her in Twilight Town—a sound she’d made certain she always knew now, as not being able to recognize it with Xemnas before had led to her death—and who would come out of it but someone cloaked in an Organization robe? Of course.
Kairi had backed away from her assailant, growling at them as she prepared to send Firaja after Firaja after them. But first, she’d had to berate them a little bit. “You have got to be kidding! I thought the lot of you had been defeated in the Keyblade War. All that we did—which- which led to Sora’s death—was so we could defeat any of you who would survive to try and get the X-Blade again. So, who are you?! And are you at all connected to Sora’s fate?! Do you know where he is?! Tell me!”
“Tsk tsk, little princess,” the attractive voice of a man replied—as he motioned with his hands that Kairi should calm down, in the way that Master Yen Sid often told the Keyblade wielders of the new generation to sit down. “It’s… good that you’re so strong now. Go, you! But don’t you know you’re killing yourself? So much sleep deprivation isn’t a good thing. And I know you’re not eating or drinking much, either. You’re going to be dead as a doornail soon, and your boyfriend’s going to come back to see that he sacrificed himself for you for nothing… or worse. That you’ve become a different person from the girl he loved… There’s blood on your hands now, isn’t there Kairi?”
Kairi had wanted to deny this, of course. After all, she’d only been fighting Heartless and Nobodies and that was something that needed to be done! But at the same time… she knew that they had once been human, and the thought made her violently sick on the inside.
But even more than that… she was hunting the things as sport now, whereas everyone else had only ever fought the beasts when they’d attacked them on their adventures… and she enjoyed killing them too much.
And she kept score, the way Sora and Riku once had with their fighting. Every injury she got was a point against her, but each hurt she gave them was a point for her: especially if she could give them many of those without being touched at all. Kairi wasn’t trying to be quick or end their suffering fast at all, but to just use them as target practice as long as she could.
And while Kairi hadn’t yet fought another human since the War, she worried that she would do the same when she faced them because it was such a routine now. Sora had only ever told her stories about how Clayton had wanted to kill the gorillas, but Kairi thought that if she herself ever run into him somehow… she’d fight him the way she was now Heartless, and be thrilled for it—that the fear he’d struck in Terk’s heart she could put in his.
So, she was falling. Falling into darkness, it seemed… and this man had known this, and it had been only the start for her.
“What do you know about it?!” Kairi had demanded then, furious. Throwing her hand out to the side in a way that Sora had used to when he glared at his enemies. “You know nothing. You don’t know me at all! You’re just a forgotten relic from a cause that’s already seen its best day. Now just tell me what you know and get lost, before I-”
“Before you what, Kairi?” the voice had cut her off. And there was a sweet cadence in his voice that she hated, as if he’d talked to someone like her before and was trying to be a friend since he’d apparently cared about this other person. “Do something unseemly to me and make Sora hate you even more that way? He loves his little light princess—that’s why he fights for you so much—so what do you think he’s going to do when he comes back and sees you aren’t like that at all anymore? Do you think he’ll stay the knight in shining armor, or will he move onto something bigger and better?
“You’re also angry. So angry. And, hey: I applaud you for it—you’re entitled to those emotions, and I may even have use of them—but Sora preferred the sweet and loving little girl, not the one who’s going to get called to many worlds because of her fury now.”
Furious? Was she really furious? Kairi had asked herself. She hadn’t felt it at the time—if torn between “bloodlust” and “fury”, she definitely had thought she was more bloodlust at the time—but the Kairi of the present could recognize how her blood had boiled back then, and continued to do so now.
But having not liked what this man had said about her getting pulled into an adventure all about her madness—because that wasn’t her at all—Kairi had tried to backtrack a little. “Maybe… maybe I’ve been a little hard on you. You haven’t really done anything to me. Perhaps if anything, you’re just giving me some… helpful advice. And I guess you don’t have to be with Organization XIII... I know a Moogle has worn the coat before, I mean, and clearly they weren’t one of Xehanort’s vessels. So can you just tell me who you are, and what you wa-”
“And how easily you fall back into the Naminé routine. Kairi, did you ever think that maybe the two of you were split for a reason? You may be the Princess of Heart… but you have far more fire to you than your Other did, and there’s a reason for it and you should relish it—you must do so—even if it means you can’t have Sora. You must let him go. Can’t you see that?”
This had put Kairi in a horrible mood, and she’d cried. But not because she was sad, but because she waslivid—maybe this man was right about that—as it hit the nail on the head too much on how she’d been feeling lately: that fate was keeping her and Sora from being together.
So Kairi made a decision. “Perhaps… perhaps you’re right. Perhaps I should go back to just barely training from now on, and be who I once was. And I will. I won’t fall into your plan, and I’ll be what Sora wants me to be.”
And partly to spite the man, Kairi had opened a Corridor of Light—something Master Yen Sid had taught her how to do—and left the guy alone.
And she did try to make good on her promise to herself. But it never could’ve worked.. For far too long, Kairi had repressed her feelings… and she was done with that. And she had no idea that trying to force herself to do that again, would send her spiraling over the edge.
Author’s Note: I was originally going to have more than just a flashback in this chapter… but since it ended up pretty long, I think I WILL cut it here. Maybe it’ll even work better to have flashbacks and present stuff in different chapters. IDK. But I hope you all enjoyed!
This was a big big fic at first and I only split it up so it’s easier to read. So, this chapter is ‘shorter’ !!!
You still can read it on AO3 though, just behind the Door! > | °|<
Words : 1633
“Isa? … Isa?”
His head was heavy, unbelievably heavy…
“Isa!!!” a happy voice spurt out.
And then a weigh on him, so quick that his head hit the floor and he groaned.
“Ah! Sorry!! I’m so happy you’re here! You’re back!!”
Isa blinked, trying to see with his view blurred. He heard his Heart hammering in his chest when he saw Lea. His fingers twitched and he brushed the cheek sparkle with a thousand of soft freckles… He always said it was because of the kisses of an Angels and with time, he just pretended his skin was keeping the memories of every of his kisses…
“Lea?”
“Yay!! It’s me! It’s you!”
Isa felt a kiss on his lips and he still was a bit in the blur but gave him a tender look. He just tried to understand everything. His last memories were him dying in Lea’s arms. If he couldn’t come back, dying there what was he really wished though he knew it was horrible for the one he loved. But there… there he was next to Lea. Lea crying while landing kiss on his skin.
“Lea, you’re hugging me too tight,” Isa said.
“Sorry!”
It was hard for Lea but he let go on him. He was just so afraid to see him vanish. Since one year, it seemed to be their fate. But Isa was there… just there, within his reach.
“You’re doing okay? You need anything?”
“I’m fine, Lea… Just a bit…” His eyes moved in the room as he tried to fix his attention, find back his marks, and he froze seeing Xion and Roxas, both waiting next to the door. “… lost.”
“It’s going to be okay. Take your time. I’ll bring you water and…”
Isa grabbed his cheeks, seeing the red marking the line around his eyes but also the dark circle. And if it was only that… Lea was absolutely beautiful. Not just because he loved him more than anything in the World but because he had his hair tied backward. And what about the clothes that were absolutely unusual for him. No more outfits you would quickly put on or the eternal Organization coat. Not, this was a nice and classy pant with a jacket… though this one couldn’t hide it the t-shirt had a big Chocobo on it…
“How many time?”
“What?”
“How much time it took for my body to be recompleted?”
Lea didn’t reply, looking down. He could have reply but he was afraid to do it on the other hand. Because it would obviously hurt one of them. Or both of them…
“One year.”
“Roxas!” Lea protested at him.
“Almost one year,” Xion rectified, her hands clenched around her pink dress adorned with flowers.
“Al…most one year?” Isa replied.
“Yeah…”
“We were about to go to Corona when Ienzo called,” Roxas pointed out.
His voice was quite bittersweet.
It wasn’t a surprise that Lea would want to reach his family if he could. He wanted to matter for so many people and the events had let him more alone than before. Isa was truly not surprised. But now, seeing Roxas with a straight pants and a shirt, and Xion so pretty, without talking about Lea… it sure meant something.
One year… it was long.
“You… you’re going to a wedding?” Isa asked.
“The wedding is over since three months,” Roxas replied. “You would have loved it.”
“Who… Who it is?”
“Eugene! He’s nice! A bit poser but nice. And he got really along with Rapunzel!!” Xion said.
“Rapunzel? Why?”
“It’s his wife,” Lea said. “Better them to get really along together, or I would have to kick some ass and I’m too busy lately,” he joked.
“Rapunzel it’s… what?” Isa asked, confused.
“He kissed you, dumbass, Lea is really still into you! You can tell since he cries every night for you!”
“Roxas stop that!” Lea blushed.
“What?! I’m helping!” he smiled, making Xion giggle a little.
“Yeah, he never stop talk about you!” she said.
“Stop that! You two!” he said, his cheeks trying to be as red as his hairs.
And reached that color when he felt lips against his and heard a tender ‘I love you’ swirl in the air. He pressed his forehead against his and kissed him softly.
“We were about to leave but… maybe you can join? We can grab some clothes at your place and… leave and then… you can install yourself at home?” Lea offered.
Isa’s Heart was singing at this idea. They always dreamed to have a home and they never ever got it…
They could have a home…
But there was a little problem he didn’t want to tell to Lea. A problem he could see in the look of Roxas, mostly. The weight of his mistakes. He had hurt the teenagers, they would be in right to hate him and he deeply believed they really hate him. He had been mean to them. To protect Axel. And while he was sure he didn’t do that wrong, seeing the events they had to fight against, he knew he really did badly.
Will they only accept them in this journey?
In their home?
“If Roxas and Xion agree, I agree too,” he replied.
“Nice,” Roxas said.
Bittersweet?
He was putting the possible sorrow of Lea on them?
Isa couldn’t step back now but he did a mistake, again.
“More we are, funnier it is, right?” Xion smiled.
“Nice! So we go get your stuff and we go to Corona with the Gummi ship!”
“If I may… I prefer not to have to go to my parent’s… You know them, if they can believe I’m dead, it’s perfect.”
“Got it. It’d been age since I didn’t sneak in your room,” Lea smiled. “You take care of them, okay?”
“Me?”
Lea pressed a kiss on his cheek. “Yes, you! We’re leaving just after!” He blew him a kiss then moved backward and left the place.
From here, Isa’s house wasn’t so far away…
Isa glanced to the teenagers. And felt something in his guts…
Pushing the door open, Xion entered and extended her arm with a smile.
“Tadaaaaam, it’s our place! Axel will be there soon.”
“Yes…” Isa felt uncomfortable. “Where is Lea’s room?”
“Aren’t you supposed to take care of us?” Roxas asked.
“Is it what you want?” he replied.
They looked at each other with opposed feelings. Xion cleared her throat with a soft smile.
“It’s upstairs, at right. Don’t worry, we can easily take care of ourselves! Axel is always afraid!”
Isa just nodded before moving away and going to Lea’s room.
This place was immediately more welcoming. It was warm and garish, just like Lea. The bed was undone and there was a slight stuffy smell so Isa just came to the windows to open them, wishing his lover won’t hate him for that.
He supposed no.
One year…
It wasn’t abnormal he had needed so many time. His body had a parasite within him, Xehanort’s remnant… Without it, it could becoming what it was at the beginning however… one year. One year was just horrible. How could he had left Lea alone for so long? He hated himself… It wasn’t his fault and yet, he thought it was…
He leaned over the windowsill and looked outside… strangely, nothing had changed…
“You didn’t stay with the kiddos?”
Isa jumped, hearing the voice, and he turned toward Lea who smiled to him, a fair amount of clothes in his arms.
“I see you’re already saving my room from my own dumbness! But don’t worry, it stayed alive one year!”
“I’m sorry Lea. For the times, for my mistakes or for not staying… with the “kiddos”. I couldn’t… I don’t think it’s correct to force them to be around me when they can avoid it.”
“You say you’re sorry for your mistakes… But were they?” he asked.
Isa frowned.
Lea came to his bed, completely done, the blankets perfectly tugged, and put down the clothes.
“Of course. I made you suffer. And them. I kept the distance between us… I wanted to protect you, however, I’m conscious I made you suffer.”
“Yeah. And I know I have been a dick too. I could have come see you, I could have beg for you to stay with me? I could have saved you in other way than letting you die! Maybe you fucked up but I fucked up too. With you and with them. They forgave me and I’m sure they will be able to see how awesome you are!”
Isa let out a sound of disdain.
“I doubt of that.”
“They fucked up too,” Lea said. “We were all thinking about our own interest, what we wanted and nothing more. We thought we had to act like that because we had no Heart and we had Heart… We just believed the wrong words… I know you since forever. You saw me fuck up more often than ever…” Lea let out a sigh. “Give yourself a chance. You weren’t wrong on everything. And I kept talking about you to them, they know you are not the Monster you were showing to them. Everything will change from now on.”
Isa approached him and took his hand.
“I’m still sorry. I made you suffer. I can’t excuse myself for that.”
“I excuse you for that and I will love you as you deserve it, no matter how much you will hate you. I’ve so much love for you anyway. I’ll show you how awesome you are,” he swore, caressing his cheek.
He slid a hairclip in the blue hairs, and just with the sound, Isa knew it was this hairclip Lea offered him when they were kid. It has a Bunny on it…
