#punssssss

[tothestarsandbackmoved]

*has discord on discord*

[pollux-wine-child]

Jason: Percy! Stop stealing my thunder!

Percy: Well I am the...

The lighting thief.

Percy: *dabs*

[the-moon-and-stars-my-love]

PSA

Gray is one of the bestest, most clever and punny people I know, and I am so gray-teful we’re friends they’re actually such a wonderful dork thanks for knighting me into our friendship @siriusly-sly

[therealandian]

So I had just finished explaining to my mother why the Soviet Union’s national anthem is basically the best thing ever. Afterwards, she told me to “stop stalling and do [my] chores.”

My response: “Don’t you mean ‘Stalin’?” Mother: “Get out.” Me: “I’m just ‘Lenin’ you a hand with your puns!” Mother: “UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” Me: “I guess I’ll just start ‘Russian’ around!” *silence* Me: “Am I disowned yet?” My poor, sad mother: “Yes.”

[the-book-court]

"It's a weevil?" Inej asked, examining it. "A chemical weevil," said Jesper. "But Wylan still hasn't named it. My vote is for the Wyvil."

Crooked Kingdom

[woundedheartwithin]

[bi-pisces07]

It’s cuz a donkey will look down, and a mule will be too stubborn to die...

[wafflerine]

magneto? more like bear-neto