As Beautiful As Holy Fire
Fandom: Dragon Age Origins
Pairing: Jowan/Leliana
Characters: Jowan, Leliana
Rating: Mature
Summary: Jowan never considered himself religious, even when he lived in the Circle. But there was something about Leliana that made him believe that maybe the divine did exist after all.
Words: 2291
Additional Tags: Gift Fic, Rare Pairs, Andrastianism, Redcliffe, Grey Warden Jowan, Self-Harm Mention, Blood Magic Mention, Nugs, Canon Divergence
Treat fic for @queen-scribbles, courtesy of the @aromanceforthedragonages! I saw you asked for Jowan/Leliana and I was intrigued. I hope you like it!
The revered mother’s sermon echoed through the Chantry, the Andrastian hymn a familiar sound. He’d spent much of his youth in the Circle Chantry, though Jowan never thought himself as particularly religious. No, usually he’d watch the initiates as they studied, enjoying the quiet murmurs as they quizzed one another on the Chant of Light. Other times, he’d stare at the elaborate statue of Andraste, trying to figure out what was so special about her. She didn’t look much different than the other women he’d seen… or the girls he’d grown up with. A woman with a legend as large as the religion created in her name.
Rubbing his wrist where the scars from his blood magic lay, he tried to focus on the words of the Chant, each one like a knife to his gut, reminding him again of how little the world thought of mages.
Magic exists to serve man, and never to rule over him.
Foul and corrupt are they
Who have taken His gift
And turned it against His children.
They shall be named Maleficar, accursed ones.
They shall find no rest in this world
Or beyond.
Even as a Grey Warden, he was still a blood mage, still the maleficar who turned an initiate away from the Chantry, corrupted her. Those were the whispers he heard as he sat in the pews, listening to the Chant with his head bowed. Trinne had assured him that he was safe from the Chantry, from the templars. Even from the Circle of Magi. But the fear was still there, deep in the pit of his stomach. The terror that one day, he’d wake up to a group of templars standing over him. That they’d clap him in chains before dragging him to his death. If it even got that far.
Jowan would never allow himself to be forced back to the Circle. He’d die before becoming Tranquil.