When I watched She Ra for the first time as a kid, I always remember being so confused and angered by the way the other princesses treated Entrapta in season 5. Like sure, she switched sides on them, and they had reason to be angry, but they also left her behind without a second thought? Knowing what she was like? And Scorpia?? Even Scorpia would favor the other princesses without even trying to stand up for Entrapta?
I didn’t know anything about autism back then. I didn’t realize Entrapta was autistic.
Then all these years later, I suddenly realize. I remember why I quit my choir of like 9 years, because even the people I thought were really good friends left me behind at the zoo (we were there for a field trip type thing) while I was in the bathroom and went off with the rest of our little group with no way for me to catch up. These are people I grew up with. People I thought cared about me. Then I realize.
OH.
Then I want to drop to my knees, to grab my Entrapta doll and give her the biggest hug, to cry.
Now I realize. I was never unkind to my friends. (And I never sent giant robots to try and kill them either) But some days I was just too overwhelmed for it all. I was shy, quiet, avoidant, because I couldn’t do it all. I couldn’t be the kind of friend they wanted or needed, I couldn’t be the kind that was easy and normal to them. I wasn’t the perfect friend because I didn’t know how.
So while I wouldn’t have left a stranger behind like that, they left me like it was nothing.
I remember Entrapta. I remember not understanding why even Scorpia wouldn’t have her back, and now I know why.
Maybe having an autistic friend isn’t easy. I’m not saying there isn’t multiple sides to this.
But I understand the pain of being left out and left behind. I understand now.
Maybe they just didn’t love me the way I loved them. Maybe they didn’t even know that I did.
And I realize I’m just like Entrapta. I understand now.
