Star Wars according to my grandfather
My grandfather has not seen Star Wars since, I quote, 1982. So, when I turned on the last twenty minutes of Return of the Jedi, these were his comments.
(Seeing Lando)There’s a black guy in Star Wars?
(Seeing Akbar) what the hell is he? Blah blah blah that’s what he says
Is that Chewbacca? That’s who it is right?
That’s dark Vader. Is that dark Vader?
(Seeing Luke)And that’s boy wonder? Isn’t that his name, boy something? What’s his name?
(Darth Vader said Obi Wan Kenobi)Is that obi kenobi?
It’s boy something. Jeremiah?
Is that dark Vader? He’s the bad guy. Is dark Vader the bad guy?
Oh that’s right Luke Skywalker now I remember.
(Seeing Han)Who’s that? Is that Luke sky walker too?
(Darth Vader was voiced by a black person) Not when I first watched it. There was no black people in dark Vader.
Is that Chewbacca? (Darth Vader’s breathing/dying)
What’s wrong with his face? (It’s burnt) it burned off? (Yeah)
(Seeing close up on red leader)Who’s that guy? (A pilot) My grandmother: see frank he’s flying a plane he’s a pilot
My grandmother: there’s the little ewokers
(Seeing Leia) who’s that lady? Princess Layla? Princess Lila? What’s her name honey?
(Seeing Ewok) is that Chewbacca?
(Darth Vader is Luke’s dad) But I thought princess Layla and him were in love. (What does that have to do with anything? And they’re siblings) I thought they were boyfriends a girlfriend
(Seeing Ewok) what are those trolls?
Who’s that silver guy? (You mean gold) silver (no gold that’s C3PO) *shakes head*
(Seeing force ghosts) who’s that the three wise men?
