How my ADHD brain reads things
So, I was just trying to read some fanfiction, and this one particular story was beautifully describing the characters and the setting and the actions using really cool metaphors and similes and just really interesting descriptive words. However, I found that if something doesn’t get straight to the point of something (ex: beautifully written stories or poems) or if something is boring to me (ex: textbooks, assigned readings), it’s hard for me to focus. So, I thought I’d quickly illustrate how my brain works with reading.
The slightly blue-ish “I am reading something” is the main voice in my head trying to read the words. The lighter, more faded “I am reading something” is like this second voice that comes in trying to also read, but in a more quiet, echo-y, and slightly delayed voice. It feels like that voice is trying to both distract me and help me focus and better comprehend the words. The third voice, the mint green “This is another thought entirely” is basically what it says. It can be literally any other thought(s), whether it be a thought about things I need to do, things I want to do, my own fanfic/drawing ideas, or just thinking about how I should be focusing on reading. It’s purely there to distract me. So, by the time I get to the end of a sentence, paragraph, page, whatever, I have completely lost all meaning of the words I just “read”, so I have to reread it, sometimes multiple times. This is why I don’t read much, why I typically skip long text posts, or write my own stories. It’s too much work for my brain to read something and then have to reread it over and over again. The only time I can really read something is if it really catches my attention and my brain allows me to hyperfocus, and then I end up reading for longer than I should.
To conclude this: my brain has several voices going on when I have to read something that is either too wordy or is boring to me, which is real heckin frustrating sometimes.
Also, to those who also have ADHD/ADD, do you have this problem too? Please tell me if you experience the same thing or if this is just a me thing! I’d love to hear your own experiences with reading and with having trouble focusing on things!
