#rebeloffaith

[johnnyhcontreras]

Power me up Father. I'm waiting... #GodsFavorite #FiorsBurden #HeidisCross #RebelOfFaith

[johnnyhcontreras]

There's No Shame in Help

There's no shame in help, sometimes we all need a little lift.

I'm NOTORIOUS for avoiding asking for help. I could be drowning up to my eyeballs and would rather gulp gallons of water before asking for a hand.

Those closest to me can't stand this about me. They also assume I have some sort of control over it. Family and friends really think I get a kick out of not asking for assistance, but that's not the case.

Truth is I dreeeam of a day where I can overcome this part of my character and just accept that it's okay to need help. Most believe it's ego-driven, and I'm sure it is, but not in the way you'd assume.

My character flaw is that I always feel like a burden. I always feel if I got myself into something then asking for help getting out of it is selfish on my part. This however is not so.

I dish this advice out regularly and my go-to line is "Hey, if God intended for us to do everything on our own than He wouldn't have placed over 7 billion people on earth at any given time". This is a fundamental truth.

In the book "No Man is an Island" by Thomas Merton, he speaks on man's foolish desire to be self-sufficient, to be these great martyrs who when all is said and done are anything but that. It is against God's desire for us to stay to ourselves, especially when it leads to our own detriment.

God wants us to take part in fellowship. Fellowship is how He is able to express His love and purpose for us without just shooting down from His home on the Sun (just one of my theories on where God really lives) and doing stuff Himself.

Had He wanted for you to do it all alone He never would have created procreation. Truth is He never would have created mankind period. I won't go deep into my belief as to why He made us in the first place, but just know I know He didn't create you to be a loner. Nope.

Again, I admit, I struggle with this and have struggled with it for years. I don't know how to just shut my ego up and say "Stop it, you're not a burden and you can't solve all your own issues without help", but I am working on it and have been working on it diligently this year. You can ask my cousins and fellow F.O.S.T.E.R. mastermind-mates.

If you too struggle with this, let me know. I can give you plenty of tips on how to overcome this. You can reach me by leaving a comment below, by emailing me at [email protected], or by commenting on my Facebook page.

Breathe and Proceed, Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

Give. Give Generously.

Give Generously.

This is another one of those self-reflection moments. Here we have to ask ourselves; how often do we give, and when we do, do we do so generously?

See, it's one thing to give, that's cool. Another thing is to give without fear of loss, or with the desire to regain something. That's where the magic happens.

When you give with a mindset of abundance, meaning there's enough to go around for everyone, it becomes an easier and gratifying experience. We combat our own selfish nature and we learn to be less dependent of people, places and things, and more aware of our own ability to create inner joy and satisfaction.

This all falls into the principle of always going the extra mile in all you do. Don't only go the extra mile when others are watching, or when it "counts" in your favor. Go the extra mile at every opportunity you get.

You may feel it's a waste when no one is watching, but remember that God (or if you want to call it the Universe, not sure why you'd do that but.. okay) is ALWAYS watching. The benefits may not be instant or even quantifiable, but life always balances itself out and with time you'll be reaping in more than you know what to do with!

Abundance people. Abundance. Have an abundant mentality and you'll never lack. Give of yourself, and do so generously.

Breathe and Proceed, Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

God Shall be my Hope...

"God shale be my hope, my stay, my guide, and lantern to my feet."

- Willie B. Shakespeare (yeah, the Romeo & Juliet guy)

Today's just one of them days. From the moment I woke up I just had that heavy manic-depressive cloud hovering over me. I planned on getting up and out of bed at 5:30am, and I did, but just couldn't get in gear and ended up jumping back in bed.

I knew I had to start my workout routine, and I knew I couldn't keep putting it off. I just didn't have the energy nor desire for it. I felt defeated. When 9am hit I forced my workout gear on, downed my water, and pressed play.

I struggled through my workout. Thoughts of defeat and failure just pressing and pressing. My only saving grace was the prayer I prayed while laying in bed. I placed all my hope in God and just did what needed to be done.

It's now a few hours later and I STILL feel that weight eating me alive. I know for sure this is going to be one of those dips that I'll struggle with for days. Who has my back though? HeyZues Cristo.

I don't know what the future holds, I don't even know how the heck I'm writing this right now. All I know is that when I've been in this funk before, He's always giving me the necessary lift right before my plunge over the edge.

When I walk through these dark valleys, uneasy and feeling unwanted, He guides and has guided my steps - He provides the lantern of light necessary for me to proceed.

I tell you this, the people closest to you sometimes will hurt you and hurt you bad. They'll do so without knowing they do. They'll devalue you, disrespect you, and make you feel the loneliest you've probably ever felt. They're human. They are full of fault.

The Lord isn't faulted. He is PURE, without malice. Absent of defect. When these troubling moments take over and you feel like you can't even pinpoint what led to them, when you feel as though it's all about to crumble, know that it isn't - as long as you seek His light.

Again, I'm nowhere near feeling good right now. I've teared up thrice already in a matter of six hours. My mind and heart only know pain and lack at the moment, but my soul, guided by the Lord, knows to hold on - He's coming in with the alley-oop assist when the moment is right.

Thank you Lord, have mercy on me.. a sinner.

Breathe and Proceed, and please pray for me. Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

Let Your Heart Live FOREVER!

"Let your heart live forever!" 

- Psalm 22:26 NKJV

Getting lost in ones emotions is so easy. As humans we have this innate feeling that we'll live forever, and it's because we will, yet we don't act like it all the time.

It's no coincidence that we think more like we're going to be here forever rather than focus daily on dying. It's not as easy as "live like today is the last day of your life" because deep down in our core, our souls KNOW this isn't our final stop.

God created us with this feeling for His purpose. Without this feeling we'd never question what happens when our bodies pass, because we'd just assume this is our final stop. Our soul however, knows this life is just a blink in the eye of eternity.

With the knowledge that there is an afterlife (oh and trust me there is, God told me ;-)), we should learn to use our heart's for better purposes than creating difference between us and others. Rather than let our emotions do their negative duties, let's use them to guide us in love.

A loving heart is the ONLY heart that'll see it's way into Heaven. Your heart, and it's actions, will live forever. Now where in forever it lives is something different. That choice is yours.. and souly yours (get it "souly" instead of solely?? Nah, ya' ain't ready b).

I'm not a big believer in hell being the everlasting fire pit it's depicted by so many to be, but I do think there is a lonely black place in eternity where the non-lovers go. I believe it's painful as well since our souls yearn to be eternally happy, which to young Guapaveli the Don means being next to Big-Daddy G-O-D forever, so without His presence our souls and hearts will only know pain and suffering from the disconnect.

Understand, whether you want to embrace it or not, there's a biiiiig MIGHT be that there is an afterlife. Even if you don't believe, what does it cost you to at least carry yourself as if there is? A little more joy, a few more friends, a happier existence for these short 70-80 years we get here? Yeah, doesn't seem costly at all.

Breathe and Proceed... with Love of course, Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

A Joyful Spirit is Like a Sunny Day

A joyful spirit is like a sunny day. It sheds a brightness over everything.

There's nothing that turns people off more than someone who just lives life sulking day in and day out. A person who just breathes doom and gloom at every chance is someone most tend to avoid.

So true is the opposite. When you walk around upbeat, confident, with a smile on your face and an aura of grace, everyone seems to gravitate toward you.

When people feel that energy coming from you they become like moths to a flame. They want to be around you at every opportunity. That's exactly what it is too, an opportunity.

With so much ugliness in the world, finding beauty has become like folklore to most. It's like chasing the rainbow's end looking for Warwick Davis' pot of gold (not really the friendliest choice when seeking a leprechaun's treasure but hey, he's the only leprechaun who's name I remember lol). The opportunity to be around joy is something we ALL seek, why not BE that opportunity for those around you?

I in no way am saying it's easy. It takes a lot of work these days to maintain a positive attitude with all the bullsh** going on, but it's not impossible. Some of us are blessed enough to just be born with that personality trait.

I myself have admitted that I suffer from manic-depression, but it's something people rarely know unless they've known me for long or I mention it. People are often surprised to find out about my condition because I'm always upbeat and smiling.

I'm not sure if it really came to me from birth or if it was a learned trait from my momma, but I know it comes from within and I can't really explain that feeling.

My coworker James (my O.G. and Vietnam Vet) tells me that spirit I carry comes from the Lord. He says "I can tell when someone is saved, and even though I've seen your ugly side, your good side comes from up above. There's no other way to explain it.", he makes me feel so blessed, whether it's true or not lol.

Positive attitudes don't just happen. You can be born with one, but maintaining it is a job we all must work on. For some it comes easier than others, but for everyone it's a possibility.. with continuous focused effort.

Tomorrow when writing your blessings out, try your best to remember them all throughout the week. The first key to staying joyful is accounting for your blessings. Your blessings will remind you of the many things that should fuel your joy.

Put the bad where it belongs, away. Learn from it and then discard it. Keep your blessings at the forefront and remember your blessings at every chance. EVERY chance.

You can only attract joy with joy - period. You can't expect to experience any happiness when all you're calling into existence is the opposite. It's law; what you resist persists.

Breathe and Proceed... joyfully. Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

Your Love, Lord...

"Your love, Lord, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies."

- Psalm 36:5

I had a conversation last night with a very close cousin of mine from my pops side. It was her birthday and I never forget it, even though we had YEARS without seeing one another. I love her dearly no matter what, it's kind of crazy really.

2014 was a TOUGH year for her. She lost a lot. Her wounds were deep and I hadn't approached her since finding out the news due to fear. I didn't know how she'd receive my condolences.

Well there I was texting her for birthday and just letting her know how much I loved her, what followed BLEW MY MIND. 

She began to speak on how horrible it had been last year but how in that dark pit of pain she heard His voice. She spoke on how faithful she is to Him because of how faithful He has been to her, and how she knows He's preparing her for greater things and that is more empowering than any other circumstance that could be flung her way.

Here I was trying to be careful with what I said to her and she knew of His love more than I could ever imagine! That was so important to me, to see that someone I love so much know of how beautiful His grace is.

His love will NEVER fail us. His faithfulness to us is GREATER than every single soul combined. No matter what circumstances we may face, He will always make sure it's for the better, as long as we allow Him to hold us.

See the thing is we always assume He only wants us to be faithful to Him and to show Him love like this a one-sided deal, no way. He requests these things from us so that He could return them TEN-FOLD.

God wants us to feel better, to do better, to live better, and to be better! He wants us to have all we desire and all we deserve, all He asks of us is to not lose sight of what truly matters; our salvation.

I've been making it a daily practice to pray as soon as I gain consciousness in the morning, and before I lose consciousness at night. I really want you to try the same. It may seem like it doesn't make a difference, but believe me it makes a WORLD of a difference.

Give Him a shot, I promise you His love and faithfulness will reach levels you never could imagine.. and then surpass even that.

Breathe and Proceed baby, Handsome...

[johnnyhcontreras]

Forgive Someone

Forgive someone whose behavior has been hard to forgive.

As enlightened and/or spiritual as someone may be, one of the greatest struggles we all face is learning to forgive. My toughest battle to this very day has been learning to forgive my favorite person on earth - Johnny Contreras.

A few months ago we attended a Dani Johnson event out in Ohio. Dani Johnson is a master at getting one to face reality, and reality I faced. She asked us to think of someone in our lives whom we can't forgive and do just that, forgive them. Now Guapo had faced this same predicament just a year earlier, while attending a bible study held by David E. Bisono out in Brooklyn, Organic. He asked that we forgive that person that causes us so much hurt, because without forgiving them we block our blessings.

There I was, angry as a mofo and incapable of letting go, I was so upset at myself for putting myself in the position I was in life. I had mentioned that I hate parts of myself before but never noticed how much until that very night when I heard God-Daddy-Universe-King whisper to my soul "Forgive yourself Johnny, you can't go on this way".

I swore I did it that night, I was done with the self-bashing and thrashing... but I wasn't. As soon as Dani requested we write down who we need to forgive I teared up and found myself writing my own name.

I didn't look at Rissey-Piecey seated right next to me because I have to put up my tough-guy persona (don't front like you don't do the same, keep it funky!), but I felt like just holding someone and crying my eyes out. 

There is NO GREATER PAIN than harboring emotions of unforgiveness toward those you love. I repeat, NO GREATER PAIN. None of us can EVER achieve real peace if we hold onto anger against our loved ones, especially if it's ourselves.

Now I'm not pointing fingers at you, but I'm pretty sure the flyest guy alive, Johnny Handsome Contreras, can't be the only one out there struggling to forgive himself. Even if you don't struggle with forgiveness, I beg you to search within yourself and seek ANY ill emotion you hold toward yourself or a loved one and address it... like TODAY.

I'm known as the Walking Truth (or T.W.T. [or T-Dub-T, that sh** is so cool] for you acronym lovers such as Handself), and so I can't bulls** you and say I'm completely over my inner dislike of the Prince of the Globe, but I promise you I pray on it every day and with God's assistance I KNOW I'm going to achieve it.

My soul's salvation depends on it - and so does yours.

Breathe and Proceed, Handsome...