#relationships ending

[crmsnmth]

The Domestication of Fire

All it takes is a spark to start a forest fire and no one proved that better than you with your hands full of books you'll never read and your crooked smile that scrunches your eyes

A hot ember can burn for hours And you were no different at all You've burned for years, smoke screen for my inner eye The smoke smells like sulphur and goldenrods

Remember once when we lit a bonfire? But even that comes down to a tiny flame And I put my hand in it to show you it doesn't hurt but on look at the skin on my hand says otherwise

Keep the coals red hot It'll be easier to light when it's time to burn one of us I remember what it's like to choke on your fumes and even though you'd go up like a dry christmas

I just couldn't do that to you

So stand in shock as I douse myself in kerosene And before she even as the chance, I drop the match and it hurts as every nerve ending are singed Cauterized by the very thing trying to eat me

It hurts but I don't scream I can't be a normal person when shes around and even in fire, I want her touch How long does it take to burn alive

My vision is from one flame to another flame but that doesn't mean I can't see you turn and walk away What's the matter, love? Were you thinking this would be that easy? I did this for you

I did this for you…

[anxiousdisaster19]

I once read somewhere the internet is a graveyard. Half-finished profiles that take the shape of obituaries, thoughts and feelings of people, forever frozen in time, even after the person is gone.

But it’s also a graveyard of relationships. Of memories of our own. Of people who might still be alive, but not in our lives anymore.

Spotify activity of a friend that shows they’re currently listening to a genre of music that in your mind, they never liked. The discord online status showing “now playing: RDR2 on PS4” – a game they once refused to buy because of its price. Their reddit profile now shows their comments in communities of which they once tried to steer clear. Their Facebook profile just got updated with a new profile picture that you didn’t even recognize at first glance.

Every platform is a constant reminder that they’re alive and well with full lives and found families and new friend groups – that don’t include you. They’re so full of life, but in your mind, they have long since passed away. They may be starting families, but in your mind, you still stand over their grave and mourn – with the translucent ghosts of your other old friends who were once in the same friend group. Once a group, that shared a bond stronger than that of blood, making memories together. Now all ghosts haunting your mind. Their voices and laughs come in echoes, the memories in film reels with gaps in the footage; each one sparked by a new reminder of what they’re doing at this very moment. In the afterlife.

[soulmates-twinflames]

I didn't lose you. You lost me. You'll search for me inside of everyone you're with and I won't be found. ~RHSin.

www.relationshipsreality.com Art: Helena Nelson Reed

[monogamistmusing]

How can you care about someone so much, and they care about you too. Yet you end up hurting each other? Time and time again..

[mentalillnessmouse]

i was best friends with this girl for nine years and since we left for school she's barely spoken to me. i've done my best to keep in contact but she's not doing anything on her end. we've only seen each other twice in the last year. i'm so heartbroken she dropped me like this and i don't know how to cope with my feelings. i don't know how to mourn the loss of a friendship like this. i feel as if i've lost a sibling. idk what to do or where to turn. how can i get over this?

hey anon, 

have you seen our Grief & Loss Masterpost link? i think the resources linked there can really help you learn how to cope. 

i also want to let you know that you’re not alone in mourning the loss of a friendship like this. i had a similar thing happen to me and my BFF from 7th-12th grade happen after graduation. we had been friends for nearly 7 years and suddenly she stopped reaching out to me and stopped responding to me. getting over our friendship and moving past her took a lot of time and effort. there’s something so awful that happens when you lose a close childhood friend. they truly do feel like a sibling, someone you thought you could depend on, and to lose that without warning...it hurts. 

some things that helped me get over her were making new friendships, making sure i had firmer boundaries, and actively keeping in contact with my friends. sometimes we can get so caught up in our own lives that we forget to reconnect and stay in contact with those who mean the most to us. some ways me and my close friends keep in touch are via video chats every so often, texting at least once a month, and scheduling day long hangout sessions. this seems to be working so far for those friendships i wanna keep up, and i’m glad. 

however, no matter how much time has passed (almost 6 years, gong on 7) i still miss my friend dearly. while i do allow myself to mourn her, i move on before it turns into a full blown depressive episode. sometimes we lose people, to time, disinterest, separation, or death. losing someone hurts, and yet we have to learn how to live in the aftermath of those farewells--even if we didn’t get to say farewell. 

write her a letter, anon. write down all the words you couldn’t say, that you wish you could say, and let that be your farewell. you shouldn’t give it to her, but let that letter be how you give yourself closure! 

i hope this helps. 

stay safe, 

kei 

[soulmates-twinflames]

The most painful goodbyes are the ones never said and never explained.~Unk . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

 https://www.relationshipsreality.com   Art: Jessica Drossin

[junesmusings]

Sweetrot

Mortally Heart-shattered, bleeding from wounds you authored, Your magnum opus Mold grows in spaces where love did once Insects gather and feast it’s sweet rot pervades my senses And I wonder When my time comes to soar Will I fester? Afraid of this life’s fast approaching decadence before I’ve mixed and made magic of it? My stiffening heart made un-malleable by yours My tongue, longing for saccharine morsels Savors only ash and dust The morsels you have brought me In a box labeled “I love you, I’ll never leave”

[s3nti-cact1]

Invited, coming? Another excuse spilling from their lips, a tap on the screen and a simple shake of the head to negate. Don't they realise it's the third out of fifteen that they've used the same? Weren't they known to be creative? A heavy veil sits on the mood, realization that it isn't by coincidence. Another lost family, another mystery of the human mind.