Birthday Letter for him + short story
I’m dumping everything here, it’s also a peek inside my head after all.
https://open.spotify.com/track/3xaugmCyXrVkrDTXbFkMW3
It’s the 24th of April, 12:04 am, she sat in her bed, with her laptop in front of her. She’s feeling a bit down but she wanted to do it, she wanted to give him something, at least a small surprise, for his birthday. Saddened by the reality that this is going to be his first birthday and she won’t able to give him something grand, she thought this could make up for it, hopefully. She pursed her lip, then smiled as she thought of the day they met.
Do you remember the first time we met? Probably not, but I still do. I was just there, standing, then Jake and you started talking. Man, I just looked at you maybe once or twice, but the image of you got engraved in my mind. Up to this day, I still have a huge crush on you.
She chuckled to herself, realizing how silly that sounded. Joji’s Sanctuary came on, memories flashed in her mind for a split second. That song is always going to be nostalgic to her, it just explains her emotions, a lot. She used to just want a person that would make her feel that she’s needed, wants to fall in love again, want to feel loved, in general. Realization hit her, that right now, finally, she found that someone.
Anyways, first, I just want to thank you, for you. You came into my life and gave me another reason to go on every day, you are the reason I look forward to every tomorrow. Thankful for all the emotions you made me feel, from the happiest ones to the saddest ones. If you ever feel like you’re worthless, always remember that you are the reason why someone isn’t giving up on life yet, you are someone’s shining light in the pitch-black dark. Remember that you saved someone from misery, you made someone feel like they are worth loving. You make the world feel like it’s less cruel, I’m just really grateful for your existence.
She cupped her cheeks as she reread what she typed, sadness gone, just happiness, just him.
Finally, you’re 18! Happy birthday, Christopher Emmet. The love of my life. It’s sad that we won’t be able to celebrate it this year, but surely on your next birthday, we will. I’m so proud of you, you know? Life can be so unfair most times but you always look for things to be thankful for, you really are a gem, you’re unique, you’re one in a million, and I actually meant that. As long as I’m here, I want to see you grow, and even help you to be your best self. Always remember that I will always be here for you, no matter what happens between us, that’s a promise. I’ll never leave you, I’ll be by your side to support you, lead you, take care of you, guide you, fight you, laugh with you, cry with you, and all that, especially, to love you. I know I’ll never find anyone like you, because you’re special and different like that. Happy birthday to my favorite person in the world. I love you so much, Emmet. I hope you can still enjoy your day this quarantine, I miss you.
She smiled to herself as she typed her heart out on the paragraph. She misses him like that, it’s been two months, life’s depressing, dreadful long days just pass by, she just wants to see him again, feel the warmth of his hugs, hold his hands, eat a nice meal with him, kiss him, and all that.
She sighed, inclining her back against the wall. Looking to her side, she saw pictures of them.
“The things I’d do to get those days back again,” she told herself, sighing.
Putting the laptop aside, she closed her eyes as she imagined the day she’s looking forward to.
Calm, that’s what her fellow students perceived her as she walked pass Daily Picks, she can fool other people all she can but she can never deceive herself.
Outside, she’s composed, but inside, she can’t contain herself. She feels like her heart is going to jump out of her ribcage, sounds exaggerated but that’s what she’s really feeling inside.
She’s just so nervous, yet so excited, to see him once again.
Once she took the turn from Sugnaan, she looked up and tried to look for him at the said meeting place. There was a lot of students gathered around but she still found him in an instant.
There he is, standing near the stairs to 7/11. Hands on the pockets of his worn-out jeans, wearing the sweatshirt she gave him, earphones in, bobbing his head to whatever he’s listening to. His hair tied in a low ponytail, a few strands covering a portion of his face.
She stopped in her tracks, just looking at him and waiting for him to look at her.
“Look at me,” she whispered to herself, “look at me, Emmet.”
He finally glanced to her direction; his lips formed into a smile.
She missed him. She did, so much.
She didn’t even realize that she was already sprinting, running to him.
“Rhoe,” he called out as she draws near.
“Emmet!” She basically cried out, finally reaching him and first thing she did was hug him.
“I missed you.” She mumbled, with her face buried in his chest.
He immediately hugged her back, wrapping his arms around her tightly.
“I missed you too, love.” He replied. He planted a kiss on her forehead.
This is the only thing she wanted in those melancholic months, the medicine to the heavy feelings in her chest, the only person to keep her sane.
His hugs, his love, Him.
She pulled back from the hug and looked at him eye to eye and grinned like an excited kid on Christmas day, he did the same then they broke into laughter.
“Can I get a hug again? I really missed you.” She pouted.
“You can get all the hugs you want today, tomorrow, and for the next days.” He told her, kissing her forehead again and pulling her into a hug. She sighed in relief, hugging him back.
“As long as I am here, you can get hugs and kisses any time you want.”
She was just home for the past few months but at that moment felt like she was finally home.
For he is her favorite place, her safe space.
He is her home. He is her sanctuary.