Mistletoe Miracle
Summary: In where [Y/n] takes her chance in conveying how she really feels. (Prompt 5 Mistletoe and Secrets)
Pairing: Colonel Brandon x FemReader
Warning(s): age gap, one paragraph of angst at the most, and probably terrible old English dialogue but you know :D!
Word Count: 3.4K (How did that happen?)
A/N: Whoop whoop! A new story for Rickmas with the prompt secrets and mistletoe, and a new character that I've never written for! This is my first time writing for the sensitive soul that is Colonel Brandon so I hope this is alright. I also had a ball writing this apparently as the word count shocked me after I got done lol. Anyways happy reading!
[Y/n] knew that her fixation on a man a decade and a half older than her was foolish and would most definitely lead to heartbreak if she tried to pursue it. Not only that, but what would the gossip in town be like if they were to become something of an item?
Would they paint him as some sort of immoral older man preying on a younger woman and her nativity or her as a money hungry seductress? And what of her dear brother? Frankly, she believed he would have a heart attack knowing his young sister was most infatuated with someone he served with in the East Indies.
But she couldn’t help it! For heaven’s sake, who wouldn’t fall in love with a man such as Colonel Brandon? Every time he came around to converse with her brother she couldn’t help but try to listen in as his voice was most enchanting. It was low like the faraway rumble of thunder, and so dark sounding for a man that seemed to have such a sensitive soul yet it was so soothing that she couldn’t help but be drawn to him.
And never would he dismiss her whenever she would intrude to ask him questions ranging from his travels to literature, to how the renovations were progressing at his estate. Instead, he was patient, answering all her questions, feeding into her curiosity about everything and anything that she asked about, never once seeming annoyed by it.
He had even been so kind as to gift her an early edition of a book they had been discussing as a late birthday present when he had come to visit once and found her family celebrating.
“For you Ms.[Y/n], I hope you do not think poorly of me for not giving this to you earlier. Had I known your birthday had been the same day as my visit I would have presented it to you then.”
She was sure she had fallen absolutely and irrevocably in love with him at that moment. And oh how she could just gush all day about him if it wasn’t for the fact that other than her best friend and confidant Adeline, no one else knew of her secret adoration for the colonel. She was much too afraid to admit how she felt, fearful she would be shot down and left in tears.
But she couldn’t hide this secret for much longer, no. Not when her parents had begun to talk even more about suitors for her as she was well past the age of living with them. So when her family received an invitation from the colonel to come and join him and some friends for an early Christmas celebration at Delaford she had almost burst at the seams.
“Oh Addie what am I to do!” [Y/n] cried desperately, laying her head on her dear friend's shoulder as they neared closer to their destination of the colonel’s estate. “If I could simply tell him I truly feel. Even if he rejects me, at least the knowledge of my trying would comfort me if I had to wed another. But to not know, to hold it in, it has become too much I think.”
“Really it would comfort you?” Adeline questioned, her eyebrows lifting up just slightly as if she was feigning surprise before continuing with a stark, “truth be told I think you be quicker brought to tears more than anything with how much you fancy him. I still don’t understand what you see in him though [Y/n] he’s so…old.”
[Y/n] jerked back almost as if her friend had called her old and not the colonel. She felt personally offended at that as she didn’t consider Brandon old, sure he was older but definitely not old!
“He is not old! Just older, and so what? He is so wise and gentle and I bet that is what makes you assume he is old.”
“If that’s what you think.” Adeline shrugged watching as her friend swooned a little before speaking again, this time her tone taking on a much warmer and caring quality. “But truly [Y/n] if you really do adore the colonel as much as you say, which I believe you do. I would cast any caution in the wind, and speak freely, and truthfully about how you feel. You never know,” she grinned, putting a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder and nudging her gently, causing [Y/n] to smile weakly at her. “A Christmas miracle may be in store for you!”
She could hardly know how right her dear Addie would be by the end of the night as they approached their destination.
When they had first arrived at the estate, which had been beautifully decorated with wreaths and banners and all sorts of festive things, [Y/n] couldn’t help but admire the majesty of it all as she stepped out of the little carriage they had been in onto the snow-covered ground. The place was abuzz with laughter and chatter as people made their way inside the home and she along with her family and friend were quick to follow to escape from the cold.
As soon as they had all entered, she immediately became separated from her family, all of whom seemed to go off in different directions to schmooze and talk with the others around. Even Adeline had left her side, saying something about how the long trip there had made her peckish while shooting off to look for whatever food there was.
On her own now, it didn’t take long until [Y/n] found herself bored with the gossiping and chit chat of the party. She had even found herself being drawn into a conversation with an older plumper woman who, as friendly as she seemed, was adamant about finding ‘such a pretty little thing’ a suitable husband by the night was over.
[Y/n] who held no interest in such a match, unless it was with the person who she had funnily enough not seen the entire night, had quickly excused herself from their exchange saying that she heard her friend calling from across the way before taking her leave. Turning heel, she moved past the crowd, wandering further and further away from the main rooms where everyone was in.
Each step brought her away from the nosy group and further into the stillness that the rest of the home contained. This was the first time she had been in such a grand estate and she couldn’t help but stop and admire just how beautiful everything was. Even the patterns on the wallpapers in the hall were eye-catching in design.
Curious about what else was around, forgetting that it wasn’t polite to snoop around others' property, [Y/n] couldn’t help but peek into a room whose door was open and the first thing that caught her eyes were the many large and tall bookshelves that lined the walls. From her vantage point, and from the dim light coming from the fireplace she could make out the spines of many books large and small.
How wonderful and convenient it must be to have such a vast amount of knowledge in one room! Going to take another step inside to get a better look at it, she was suddenly jumping out of her skin when she felt a hand on her shoulder. A surprised shriek left her form and her heart felt like it had stopped as she whipped around to face the man who had been missing the entire night. Colonel Brandon. Who also seemed surprised to find the woman wandering about.
“Oh, colonel!” She sputtered out trying to find the right words for her situation of being caught roaming around where she ought not to be. He may have been a kind man but that didn’t mean she had the right to take advantage of it by meddling around where she had not been invited. “I’m so terribly sorry I didn’t mean to intrude. It’s just that I found myself having to escape from a conversation and it led me to wander about and I just couldn’t help but admire how beautiful everything is! And your library colonel it’s so wonderful, incredible really and oh my goodness I’m so sorry what am I saying I shouldn’t-”
She was going off the rails at that point, her words spewing out faster than she could think through what she was saying but before she could continue digging herself into a hole she was stopped by him.
“Ms.[Y/n],” his voice so warm, and low yet able to command her to a stop and bring her to attention. It sent a little shiver down her spine and she was glad for the dim light in hopes he didn’t see her quivering. “It is quite alright,” he murmured kindly, as he gazed at her with a relaxed expression causing her to feel a bit better. “I’m not at all upset with you and am very pleased that you find the renovations to be as wonderful as I think they are. They did take quite some time so I’m happy that there are others who would admire them.”
Giving her a sweet smile, one that had her heart, which had calmed down, begin to speed up again. [Y/n] couldn’t help but return the gesture, delighted that he didn’t seem at all mad about her roaming around.
“Well I’m certainly glad to hear that colonel I didn’t want to ruin such a joyous night by upsetting our host. Though I,” she stopped herself correcting her word of choice and hoping he didn’t catch the slip up. “We have missed you at the gathering. I hope you haven’t had some urgent business last minute?”
She seemed to have hit the mark though as his face turned a bit apologetic at that.
“Unfortunately yes but thankfully it has been resolved you see,” he started, “I was just about to make my way to everyone in hopes no one would notice my long absence before dinner but I see you did?”
‘Of course I did, you're the reason I’m here to be honest.’
Ignoring her inner monologue as much as possible, she nodded in the affirmative trying to give him the best reassuring look.
“Well of course! I am the ever eagled eye lookout.” Her words teasing as she tried to lift the mood not wanting him to feel bad about his noticed absence. It seemed to do the trick as that gentle smile returned to his face and the little crinkles near his eyes showed up as he looked at her with a softness that had her chest constricting.
He was just so handsome, even in the dim light. And everything about him was just immaculate. Never had she held someone in such high regard. And never did she find someone so…so beautiful that every time she saw him she felt like she couldn’t breathe.
“Yes you are and a very good one at that,” he chuckled, breaking her away from her thoughts about him and offering his arm up to her, “but shall we return to the others? I will make sure to rescue you from any dull conversation to make up for my tardiness. If that is alright?”
Looking at his offered arm and then up back at him, [Y/n] realized something that she should have thought of much earlier. It was that they were alone. Utterly alone and away from the prying eyes and ears of everyone from the party. Away from her family and from her friend. Alone.
This had a nervous lump instantly form in her throat as she acknowledged that this may be her one and only chance to talk to him alone about her feelings. About how much she adored him and hoped that maybe, just maybe there could be something more between them. And so shaking her head ‘no’ and seeing the confusion in his eyes, she spoke softly.
“Wait, colonel, just a moment. I would like to share something with you if you would allow me.”
She did her best not to let her voice waver even though she felt as if she could pass out as he dropped his arm and gazed at her puzzled about the situation. Somehow even in his confusion she couldn’t help but think about how thoughtful and gentle he looked.
“Yes of course you are always welcome to speak freely with me [Y/n]. ”
It was now or never. She had to tell him how she felt about him or she would just combust. Never had she been so glad to be alone with someone in her life. At least if he did reject her, it would be tucked away in the shadows for no one else to see.
Taking in a deep breath, she hesitated no longer.
“Colonel Brandon,” she started clasping her hands together and nervously looking down to avoid his gaze.“ I know this may be too forward and I understand if you may find me silly for it but for these past months, years really. I have found myself to be very fond of you.”
There it was. She couldn’t even bring herself to look up at him too afraid of the expression that he might be wearing. So she didn’t and she continued to spill everything that she had been holding in. From her longing to the quiet affection that she held for him.
“At first I thought it just some sort of passing fancy when you first came to visit my brother,” she continued, not giving him an inch to speak fearing if she didn’t say everything she would hold something back. “I couldn’t take my eyes away from how handsome you were and how gentle you seemed, from the way you spoke to the look in your eyes. Everything in this world seems to interest you and it was such a wonderful feeling when you encouraged my curiosity for things as no one had done such.”
“Little by little my affection for you has grown and I know that what I feel for you isn’t a passing fancy anymore and it wasn’t until recently when my parents spoke to me about finding a suitor that I knew I couldn’t wait anymore to share with you how I feel. Because..because.”
Something wet seemed to hit her cheek causing her to pause and lift her hand up to it to wipe it away. As she kept wiping it seemed that her cheeks dampened quicker before she realized tears had been pouring down her face. But she didn’t stop, she just couldn’t and so finally she looked up at him with wet eyes, a tinge of guilt in her stomach at how he must feel being cornered by her.
“Because even if you reject me at least I will have known I was able to tell you and not hide away. So please forgive me if you resent me for putting you in such a position. It was never my intention but I just could no longer hide such a secret.”
If a weight was supposed to be lifted off her chest, or clarity was supposed to suddenly drape over her it didn’t. Somehow she felt worse as she stood quietly under the stunned gaze of the older man who hadn’t said one word.
‘Of course he didn’t [Y/n] it’s not like you gave him a chance.’
The silence was absolutely deafening and it also felt like there was a silent rejection in it. And so as to not hold either of them hostage to her feelings anymore, and to quickly get away so she could cry in peace somewhere, she just gave him a little apologetic smile that she hoped said ‘I understand’.
“I guess we should be going, right? I’m sure everyone will be wondering.” She laughed awkwardly side stepping him from underneath the door frame trying to escape the soul crushing reality of his rejection.
It shouldn’t have been surprising really. Who did she think she was that such an important person, such a regal, intelligent, and sensitive man like him, would have looked at her with the same affection she held? She should have known better and it shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did, but it did.
And she was ready to run away and had even started to do so, before she felt herself being pulled back and spun around to face him. All of it had happened so quickly that when she had registered what was going on there were already a pair of soft, warm lips upon hers.
His hands were wrapped tightly around her upper body as one of them slid to the base of her neck to stroke the sensitive skin there. He was kissing her. The man who she would wait for to visit just to be in his presence, the man who was just so gentle and patient with her.
The man who she most fervently adored. He was kissing her! And she absolutely melted into his arms. Kissing him back with the passion that had been burning deep inside her for him. They clung to each other tightly, lips pressing against one another over and over until one had to pull away to breathe due to the suffocating passion.
“Forgive me for not saying anything,” he murmured as they parted a little, noses still brushing against either as he went to peck her lips once more before continuing, “you must understand how shocked I was to hear that the person I’ve also been so fond of felt the same that it was hard for me to realize what I was hearing.”
“Colonel-.”
“Christopher my sweet,” he corrected gently, unwinding his hands from around her so that he could stroke her cheek.
“Christopher,” his name rolled off her tongue with such ease and it felt like music to both of their ears as she leaned into his comforting touch. “Why didn’t you tell me?” She whispered up at him with questioning eyes. “All along I’ve been afraid that you would reject me, yet you also held feelings for me?”
“Because not once did I think I was a suitable match for you,” he confessed which brought a frown to [Y/n]’s face as she couldn’t think of anyone else who was perfect for her. He saw this and could only give her a sad smile as a response before continuing.
“You have so much of your life ahead of you and I did not want to put you in such an uncomfortable position. Yet just as you, I found it difficult with each visit to not become fond of you, and in time the fondness grew more and more until I could not bear the thought of you being with another.”
Hearing his words, and seeing the sincere look in his eyes only had her swooning more and more. He loved her. He actually loved her and she felt over the moon knowing this. Knowing that such a perfect being like him would adore her as she adored him oh it was so good so wonderful she felt like she could burst with joy!
“Oh Christoper,” she sighed out, finally leaning up to kiss his lips softly and murmuring. “How are you so wonderful? So perfect?”
He shook his head ‘no’, as they pulled away his warm smile returning as he offered her arm once more, this time with her taking it and beaming back up at him.
“No I am none of those things, but you my sweet, my darling, you are all those and more.”
‘Goodness gracious can he be any sweeter!’
Her mind was an absolute happy mess at the moment looking up at him and it was only when he asked,
“Shall we rejoin everyone now?”
That she snapped out of it and answered him with a very enthused,
“We shall.”
Before walking away though something swinging above the doorframe of the library caught [Y/n]’s eyes and she turned to give it a look. Noticing her pause the colonel turned with her to look and couldn’t help the soft chuckle that left his lips.
“Mistletoe, how wonderfully placed,” [Y/n] giggled looking back up at her love who looked down at her with an equally warm look.
“Indeed very wonderfully placed,” he spoke before leaning down and pressing the most tender kiss against her lips.
A/N: Yall the way I wrote this last night like it was an essay due at 11:59pm and I had procrastinated 🤣. This is why I can't do events because life keeps smacking me but I'm like I wanna write.
ANYWAYS let me know if you all enjoyed it and of course, thank you for stopping in to read it!!! See you guys on the next prompt I'll write for ( I hope lol?) ❤❤❤🥰
