The RPC is fucked up and it's our fault for letting toxic people join our communities and allowing them to misbehave, brushing it to the side thinking it will fix itself in the end. It hasn't. Then they cry wolf whenever their bad behaviors are pointed out. We should stop sympathizing with these toxic roleplayers, and start calling them what they are. Bad roleplayers. Start kicking these people out and stop forgiving them. They don't deserve it. They will destroy you, and whatever circles you are in. Whether that be in Discord RP Groups or Tumblr RP Groups. It starts with bubbling, it starts with these dick measuring contest, and these incessant needs to be the center of attention. Give them nothing. They deserve nothing until they can behave better. If they want to act like middle schoolers. Treat them like it.
Stop your bullshit, and be a better roleplayer and human being.
One big problem that the RPC has these days is that people keep trying to roleplay like this:
*Muses having a heated conversation with one another*
Them: *Is an asshole to someone's muse*
Other persons muse: *Is an asshole back to them*
Them: D: NOOOOO! YOU CAN't DO THAT!
Their friends' muses: *viciously attack the other person's muse without the context needed or awareness of how anything started here*
And then you step into other territory at times. Not only. Are these roleplayers making it difficult for you to properly play your muse? But if this roleplayer also happens to be popular, or been in a group longer, or in a community longer. Or their muses themself is well-liked by other muses and muns in the Rp. These roleplayers will as a group gang up on one muse and then get mad if that muse doesn't back down.
This would not be a problem if everyone in the group understood that this is roleplaying and disputes and disagreements happen. But many roleplayers of today do not seem to understand this. That their muses having conflict with other muses is going to happen. That not all muses are going to like your muse, and that's okay. That all muns are not going to like you or your muse, and that's okay.
What is not okay is mistreating someone because you dislike them or their muses. What is not okay is ganging up IC on that person's muse and then trying to play your muses off as holier than thou pricks that think that just because they're being agreed with they are automatically in the right (not because this isn't a good thing, this is character. But in many of these instances, this is a reflection or projection of the mun thinking that behaving like this is itself alright OOC, this is not to associate muse to mun, but the revelation of mun using muse to attack players in IC and mun believing their muses opinion to be the only one that's right. If a mun thought differently, these situations would play out far differently with both muns involved coming to a fair balanced conclusion to the interaction, instead of shady backstabbing tactics that tend to play out behind the scenes after it when the mun DOES believe their muses opinions and thoughts are the only correct one's. You get a group of these kinds of roleplayers in one roleplay doing that to any muse outside of the social group, as a leader of an RP you need to have a chat with those players. Whether the opinion IS right or wrong, this behavior is disgusting when other players cannot play their muses having their own agency because then they will be piled on by the group that thinks theirs is the only one. These players are toxic and like to play down things by saying things like 'Well the other muse should have just shut up then', because no, the other muse doesn't have to shut up doesn't have to believe their muse, doesn't even have to play nice with their muse, it's called roleplaying, and leaders out here who have participated in, or let players participate in that engagement between your players, you need to cut that shit out. ASAP.). This is not always the case. Stop being ignorant about these interactions. In character or out. These interactions are a fact of life. Brigading to get a player kicked because you cannot personally overgrow your own inability to understand these interactions and moral complexities of humanity is not the other players' fault. Or the fault of the muse they are playing.
This works on many levels. But at the end of the day, when the mun playing a muse becomes the victim of the aftermath of one of these interactions it has crossed a line. Many of you need to grow up and stop associating mun with the muse and separate yourselves from yours in a manner that you can understand how and why the other person would be playing their muse as they are. The RPC is for everyone. If you don't like someone or a muse, because of such petty shit, how are you going to protect the rest of the community from those who are a real danger? Because the pendulum always swings by, guys.
What you are doing to your fellow roleplayers today, will be done to you one day. You will have to deal with the consequences of your actions. Only as the years go by, it will grow worse. It will inevitably make what you do not want to happen, happen. You will have chased away all the decent players just because you couldn't be bothered to take a moment of your time during an IC dispute to recognize that neither of you, the muns, hates each other, or should. Neither of you, the muns, needs to bitch and complain to the leaders of your group because you could not be grown enough to recognize that not all roleplayers play the same way you do. But you are both in the same roleplay.
If you don't like where a conversation is going with your muse and another. It's not the other muse's job to stop talking. It is definitely not the other muns job to make their muse stop talking. This is natural engagement and many people understand that the muns not attacking people just because their muse isn't the friendliest or argumentative. These things are part of people everywhere. People are argumentative. People don't shut up just because you want them to. They don't obey you just because you can't deal with the moment you involve yourself. It is your job as the mun to look at it and decide if it's worth your emotional toll to spend on it. And if not, you're the one that needs to have your muse shut up. Stop shifting the blame onto the other mun for having fun just because you weren't.
If such interactions with your muse aren't something you want, stop getting involved in them. Or kindly ask the other mun to avoid those interactions with your muse. It's that simple. Communication is very fucking important, and it's a shame a lot of you can't get that in your heads. You are the master of how your interactions go. Communicate that you don't like something if you don't. Stop expecting people to read your mind just because you're a 'shy baby UwU' who thinks that people should step in and save you or your muses from conflict. They don't have to, and you don't need it. If you have communicated your boundary with a mun who refuses to listen, that's when you go to the leaders of your group. Your petty bullshit where you sob and whine to your group leader first is not only a hassle and a burden on the entire group who now has to cater to your whiney ass, but now they have to have a conversation with the mun you should have spoken to first. Most muns appreciate when you communicate with them first, it's a sign of trust. And once trust is broken between players it's only a matter of time before shit starts falling apart.
So take some responsibility, people. Stop destroying your communities over some petty shit that you could easily prevent by communicating clearly and easily what you want. Shyness shouldn't be an excuse, if you want a mod to mediate for you, fine. But just keep in mind what that projects when it comes to the other mun. Keep in mind how you are not the perfect mun either. None of you are. You are all writers in a fucking roleplay. You all had to pass the same test to get in there. Start treating each other better. Stop attacking each other every couple of days or weeks because you can't understand that not every conflict is fucking about you. It's not. If it's with your muse it's because your muse has done something. Most people, mun or muse, don't just wake up one day and decide to hate someone for no reason. So many of the roleplayers in these communities are behaving like sociopaths and narcissists and it's gross. They aren't.
But for some unknown reason, they have picked up these behaviors along the way which makes it hard to differentiate between who really is, and who just thinks it's cool to be. It's not cool. Stop it. Be a fucking decent human being, that's all you have to do. Many of you are failing at that these days. Whether it be in roleplays toward each other, or in society at large. Stop it. It's not funny. It's not cool. You look gross. The rest of us hate you. We don't want to hate you. Because we get it, we've all been a little self-centered prick before. But the thing is eventually we grew out of it. Not anymore though. A lot of you have stayed frozen in this state and you've kept others frozen in this state. Hindering your own ability to write, and theirs.
If you didn't like reading this and actually bothered to truck your way through to the end, then here's a little hint, you might be the type of people focused on here. If it is, it's time to stop doing this. If you know someone who does this and have been a part of it you need to stop and you need to help your friends stop. Recognize that this is bullying. This is toxic behavior. If they won't be your friend anymore because they can't help themselves, and refuse change, cut them off. There are other people out there who don't need to be bullies to get ahead. Neither do you. Because this is not healthy behavior to be in the presence of. This isn't to make you feel bad. But good if it does that means you recognize something is wrong. This is a wake-up call. You need to stop participating in this behavior. It's not cool. It's not funny. It is juvenile. It doesn't matter if you are 18 - 55 as a roleplayer doing this. This is not how you should be behaving. Whoever taught you to engage with anyone this way was wrong. Whether that be anyone you spoke to when you first started writing telling you you had to act this way, or whether it was you, deciding that being this way was cooler or easier (or whatever other reason for doing this kind of thing) than making a friend.
The truth is it's not. You don't need to tear someone else down, to be a good roleplayer. You don't need to make everything go exactly your way to be a good roleplayer. How you become a good roleplayer (And even better person) is how well you treat your fellow roleplayer. How well you understand them. How willing you are to let them be as creative as you want to be yourself. You may not have all the same prowess as them, or tools, or wordsmithing. But any good roleplayer will love you without needing all of that, they just want someone who is not going to make this hobby harder than it needs to be. Because this is supposed to be a relaxing and fun hobby, so many roleplayers as mentioned above have made it into a stressful, competitive, and aggressive boxing ring where some of the players have decided to hide razors in their gloves instead of playing fair.
Stop competing with other players if you lose against another muse/mun you're writing against your losing the gold medal (it's not that fucking serious guys) and start writing because you want to have fun as much as the other player does. This hobby isn't always all about you and your muses, other people exist and partake in it every single day. The players mentioned above cannot conceptualize the idea that other people exist outside themselves and their muse, or their friends, and their friend's muses. They aren't there to serve to make them happy. I'm not here to write for someone who cannot consider for a moment the thought and care that goes into writing my muse and just because my muse would disagree with yours doesn't make them a horrible wicked person and it doesn't make your muse one either. Allow your muse to be disagreed with. Allow yourself to write a muse that can be wrong that can make a mistake and not be able to accept they made it. Why are we acting like muses arguing with each other is the mun projecting that onto their muse? Start asking yourself where those thoughts are coming from. At some point, you may reach a very important conclusion. You're the one that's been projecting onto your muse. Making them self-inserts because of your own beliefs conflicting with another muse.
If you don't see that as happening, check in with the other mun. See how they think, and ask them how they feel about the engagement. Stop acting like you're always under attack or that your muses are always in the right, just because you think they are. They might be, they might not be. You have to listen to other people's thoughts too, though. You or your muse even, let your muse reflect on their stances when opposed instead of just jumping to the defensive just because you agree with your muse. Other people don't have to, and some muns tend to not write their muses as doing so if they are writing a muse that does believe differently from yours. It's the same as dealing with each other. I might not believe the tooth fairy exists. But that doesn't mean Johnny doesn't and no matter how many times I tell him his moms putting that bill under his pillow when he lost a tooth he won't believe me. He just cannot believe me....
If you're going to write someone like Johnny, you have to be prepared to have someone write someone like me. The matter of opinion is ever-changing. What's written as truth today may be discovered as wrong tomorrow. Your muse will be wrong sometimes and your writing them fighting about it bitterly is only going to make most interactions with another muse worse, and that's okay. As long as you understand that if you also believe what bullshit your muse is saying, you can also be wrong, and that doesn't mean you have to get the other mun kicked out of a roleplay just because you have some authority to do so and didn't like their muse arguing with yours over a point you or your muse may or may not write about. Either get over it and move on or stop engaging and go live out the rest of your life going "Phfft, what a stupid person that muse is." just don't bring it into OOC because that's not you or your muse's fucking business to be dictating other peoples opinions by force muse or mun. But I keep fucking seeing these roleplayers doing this shit all the damn time and it's like they don't even see the problem with all this absolute trash behavior they are putting on.
Cool, so you have five fucking people on your side, and that one mun writing a muse that won't agree with your muse is annoying you because everyone should love your muse-- what the fuck....uh,. no? No not every muse has to love your muse. Not every mun has to love your muse. Your muse is honestly probably hot fucking garbage and your friends are probably fucking ignorant to the fact they can dislike your muse, too, and still like you. You're all a bunch of shady bitches though so who the fuck can ever tell you might just all like sitting in a circle masturbating on the thoughts of how awesome all your muses are and how perfect you are, who knows, who even gives a shit honestly. The point is, shut the fuck up stop acting like your shits the best ever, and let other people write the way they want to write if it's not actively hurting anyone but your personal feelings about how you're not the best thing in the roleplay and how dare someone not be nice to your muse. Fuck you. And fuck your muse. And your silly little friends who help treat other people like shit can go fuck themselves too. You make everyone sick and want to flee to a different planet. But we have to realize. We don't have to flee to a different space just to take these fuckers down. All you really have to do is not let them lead you on with their bullshit and stop turning on other players who aren't part of their usual cliques. That's how you get the RPC back to its usual standard of things lasting for more than a few months. Aren't you fucking sick of that?
You'll enter a fresh roleplay and usually within a few months you have players like this or players who constantly bubble but get mad if you don't include them or some stupid ass shit that is just so impossibly mind-numbing insane and it feels so stressful roleplaying against these people but you feel obligated to because your in a group together. Alright. Well, these people have no sense of that in their thick skulls. They literally only have "Me, get what I want! Me! Have my muse be the best ever. Me! Want all the threads!" They are assholes and the leaders have got to start fucking bringing them down to ground level with the rest of us. Because if you let these players go for too long thinking the sun only shines out of their assholes then you have a bunch of surmounting issues coming. You don't have to kick these people or treat them badly either. You just have to ignore them a lot of the time when they start kicking up dust about things not going how they want in interactions between their muses and others. If the mun is misbehaving, reprimand accordingly. Time outs. Warnings. Removal from the whole RP once, maybe twice.
Then just downright ban them. Most of the leaders of roleplays won't do that though. Because they are often afraid of these kinds of roleplayers. These roleplayers also have a tendency to go on to spread lies about the group leaders or the other muns of a group and they are always the victim. This is why I call them acting like narcissists. Because this is a key component of their toolkits. They like to start shit, get backlash, then throw a fit about it. Not just once or twice, no. This is every single day with them behaving like this. They treat their muse like they are the main character in the entire group, and they and their friend's muses are all that should get any event progress or special treatment and focus above all other players in the roleplay. If you don't give them that focus some of these muses even have little protests on the mun's behavior who will sit there and either write to the leader, in the OOC, or in IC with their muse about how 'boring' everything else is because their muses aren't involved or as involved as they want them to be.
They won't try to involve their muses in anything themselves either. You have to be the one to ask. You have to be the one to come up with the ideas. There are so many tricks these people pull and it's easier to see them once you know who they are and all it takes is looking at how they write their muses. Here's one very easy tell. If your muses are in fact arguing with them. They say something mean or insensitive. The muses they are writing usually become excessively violent or insulting toward the other muse. Now if the other mun muse reacts the same way, that's just two of the same roleplayer type. But if the other mun's muse reacts in a more relaxed way and manages to not be bothered by the exaggeration the other mun is going to great lengths with their muses reaction then you have more than likely identified your bad apple roleplayer. Because these players cannot help themselves. Their muses have to be excessively aggressive or violent when provoked, they cannot help themselves. They for some reason think that this is how you play a character that's been made to be upset. It could be. But a little offhanded comment or such shouldn't immediately warrant threatening another muse's life over.
Especially if it's one of the first interactions these characters are having. That's if you're trying to play a muse whose temper is notably bonkers by the muse on description. Not many of these kinds of roleplayers add that into their muse's bios. Because these muns don't actually follow their own muses' personality traits when they are more than likely just projecting their own personal feelings and morals into the muses anyway. These muns just love to try and their muse says the most savage string of violence-laced words and does not think about the actual logic in them. And their friends will write their muses eating that shit up because none of them share more than a single brain cell between each other. That's why people get kicked out though. Because most leaders also don't share much brainpower to decipher that. They just get a whole "This player did this with their muse and I feel so attacked right now." And the leader won't think about it much further than "Stop having your difficult muse be difficult. They are supposed to heel like any other muse to that muse." Even if it would not make any logical sense. These people couldn't follow a fucking character sheet if you taped the goddamn thing to their fucking glasses.
That's really how you start to identify them. They don't usually serve as one. Many of them even form from scratch in a server. But they all, almost always, portray the stupidest fucking muses you could ever imagine interacting with. Like if you tell these people muses that they are about to walk on a minefield, this motherfucker will have their muse be like "Oh well he knows ballet, go Johnny, show em your moves" or some shit and by the time the scenes finished Johnny has magically danced his way through a minefield. Because he's sooo awesome. He's sooo cool. I'm not even jealous either. I find these players amusing when I'm not at the speartip of their inane clusterfucks of making everything about them and their muses personally. I recognize them for what they are, clowns. But they can be very dangerous clowns if you let them stew in that tendency to whip an entire group into a frenzy on their behalf and gang up on one muse.
You may be like "Ah well that's just because that player that's being ganged up on must be annoying. It must be their fault for writing a difficult muse, right?" No. It's not. It's not that muns fault. It's not that muse's fault. The players who are writing this ganging up on for malicious intent are the ones at fault and we often ignore it because we are told if we say anything that we're the problem. Or we soon become the target of it, too. None of us should have to put up with this domineering type of roleplayer when it turns into something like that. IC or OOC is the same. This isn't right. This isn't how a roleplay functions. All the muses matter, all the muns matter. They are all equal parts of the machine. These players are not the arbiters which should be anything more or less than that. The leaders need to educate themselves on how these players are in their RP because not only do they attack and single out the average mun outside of their groups. But they will also attack the leaders by accusing things like bubbling when it's clear they are the ones bubbling and not trying to interact with other players. Or they will pit you against each other. Or they will threaten you with leaving en masse if you don't do what they want.
I've watched these people do this time and time again. I've told roleplayer leaders about these players. I usually get told by the leaders that they don't know what to do with those players. You reprimand them. You make sure that they are not treated any better than any other roleplayer. If need be, you remove them if they do not follow your rules. Because that is the only thing between your roleplay being kept together and total anarchy with these players. Who will ask that you break your own rules to cater to them? Like when they start drama with another mun. But make it that mun's fault. These players do this, and often. I am not kidding right now. It is one of their most malicious tactics. They will get rid of all your supportive players. To where you only have them and then they will fucking not do anything. They won't really write. If they do, they only write to themselves. They only want to do the events they want to do.
They won't let you do any other ones. They will mini-protest the shit out of you if you do. But what should you do, if you punish one of them they'll all leave, right? Good. Fucking let them. Advertise your shit till you find players who want to interact with each other. Who wants to build on the world you have presented to them. Who doesn't want to take vacations away from it and text back to the main chat "Ahh this is a nice day on the beach, its a shame some of you couldn't come because I didn't invite you." text. Fuck those players. They deserve to be on the same playing field with the rest of us and if they don't fucking like it, they can go jerk off to each other in a different group. If you're a mun who started their own roleplay group that also is this kind of roleplayer. You have to stop behaving like this. The worst version of this is a leader who is that roleplayer. Because they still fall into the same trappings as those who aren't. You're not exempt from these guys just because you're part of the group. They will and have done it to leaders like you, too.
This kind of shit stops, when you stop it. It doesn't really fade out. It's been present in every RPC community that had desired quantity over quality from the start. So what if your fucking member numbers are low? At least it can fucking thrive better in an environment with control rather than one thrown into total disarray by these dipshit roleplayers who think they are better than others. I'd rather have a group of dedicated roleplayers who couldn't string a perfect grammatically correct couple of sentences together. The princess 'let's bully others for fun while we pretend to roleplay' and her court jesters destroying the RP after only a few months of it being active. They should find a different hobby or they should learn to be better roleplayers in this one. No more 'oh that's just how things are.'. No it's not and it doesn't have to be that way. Fuck those guys. You need to start saying to them "Get with the program or you're gone" If they leave then because of that, BYYE! Stop taking it out on single muns who are being isolated by these players, stop taking it out on mun's who write muses that don't like those mun's muse. I'm tired of seeing it. You need to get with the program guys.
I had to stop participating in Artfight two years ago because my abuser/kin thief started playing. Artfight not only refuses to ban him, but actually banned ME for trying to confront him. It appears that he abandoned his old account, but he’s been known to rebrand. This person psychologically and verbally abused me starting when I was 12, manipulates and fakes health issues to avoid accountability, and it’s very likely that he’s still claiming victims. I don’t have direct proof of his past actions because most of it happened on a Discord account I deleted and I didn’t think to save screenshots, but I do have some other evidence through testimony and doctor’s notes.
Note: the above usernames are outdated or abandoned, anyone who is actively using them now is not Jay.
I met Jay when I was 12 and he was 14. I’m catkin, specifically I’m a Warrior cat in Riverclan named Nightheart. When I first joined Tumblr, I spent a lot of time scrolling through the WC tags to see if there was anyone using the name Nightheart for their OCs so I could tell them to stop. Most of them blocked/ignored me, but Jay (going by Nighty at the time with the username NotARegularGuy1999) apologized and changed his name to Jay/Jayheart. He told me it was awful that all the other people that were using my kin name for their OCs didn’t care about how stressful it was for me, which made me trust him enough to add him on Discord.
Jay was the only person willing to roleplay with me (nobody at school was into WC as much as we were), but he would always write these REALLY long messages that I just couldn’t keep up with. He’d get frustrated and refuse to play anymore because I’d respond with a few sentences, which was traumatizing for me given the fact that Nightheart is literally me and I had no other way to be myself (nobody at school understood what kinning was). Eventually this psychological abuse escalated into verbal abuse when I begged him to play with me and he yelled at me over text. I kept begging him to play with me for years and he would abuse me over it nearly every single day. Eventually when I was 14 and he was 16, he said that his mom was grounding him for a few months because she caught him being groomed by his boyfriend. I had a feeling this was a lie because his then boyfriend was 15, and two weeks into the grounding, Jay deleted his Discord. I ended up talking to said BF for his side of the story and he said that Jay was doing it so he didn’t have to be friends with me anymore. I haven’t been able to contact the ex bf again because someone with the same username as him got outed as a predator a few months later (this was before Discord changed how it does usernames) and he deleted his account.
I didn’t want to believe that Jay would abandon me like that. I waited for the full three months to see if he’d come back and he didn’t. His Tumblr was gone too. I kept searching his name and all the tags he’s probably use for YEARS, until finally, I found him again with a new account when he was an adult and I was 16. Note that at this time, I didn’t really view what he did to me when I was 12-14 as abusive because I was trauma bonded to him. He said that he was going by his legal name now (Jared) and he didn’t actually leave me on purpose, it’s just that his mom made him delete his accounts and after a few months in therapy he realized he didn’t want to be on social media anymore.
I added him on Discord again (btw, my Discord never changed so he could’ve easily added me himself). I was really excited because I had gotten a little better at roleplaying and thought I’d be able to actually keep up with him. I asked if we could roleplay and he said he didn’t really do that anymore because of the stuff with his ex. I begged and told him how important it was for me, so he said he’d try, but when I started by having Nightheart jump out of the bushes to greet her long-lost friend, he told me that he doesn’t do stuff with Warrior Cats anymore.
This devastated me and was extremely, EXTREMELY traumatizing. This wasn’t just roleplay for me, it was my ONLY way of existing the way I truly am inside. Every time I tried to stress this, Jay would just manipulate me by saying sorry over and over and talking about how bad he felt. After a few months, he told me that we didn’t seem to have much in common anymore and abandoned me. I started talking to my therapist about potentially being traumatized by what happened a week after I got over the shock. I’ve had people (Jay’s enablers/sympathizers) tell me that this doesn’t count as trauma before so I’d like to clarify that my PTSD is professionally diagnosed. HERE is the diagnostic paperwork.
Once I realized what Jay did to me, I started trying to come up with a way to confront him about it. He got “harassed” for saying he was a lesbian while he’s still 14.8% male on Tuesdays/Thursdays and it led to him changing his username to NARG1999, so I knew at that point that I needed to keep better track of him. I blocked him on a side account so that it’d update every time he changed his username. I had to take 4x the amount of Xanax I’m allowed to in a day but when I was 16.5 and he was an adult, I finally confronted him about abusing me for years. At that point, he was going by the name Bucky. I knew in my heart that he hadn’t changed and he proved it by blocking me in response. So, I made alt accounts to confront him about that too. Eventually, he responded to my message and said that he was really sorry because he had no idea that what he did felt traumatizing for me. He also said he blocked me because he didn’t want to think about the trauma that was going on in his life during that time and he just felt really bad about not being a good friend to me while we were young.
Because I believed him, I instantly felt better and tried to see if he wanted to be friends again, but he stopped replying shortly after, then blocked me and changed his username to 19961234561 after a few weeks of messaging him. My therapist said that avoiding me like this made it clear that he wasn’t actually sorry. She told me to just give up and try to move on. I decided to listen to her, but this was a mistake, because in the process, I deleted my old Discord account so I’d never have to see the old roleplay ever again (I had been re-reading it every day since he got grounded when I was 14).
I am FAR from Jay’s only victim. When I was 16.7, I got testimony from his ex-gf that he was neglectful by not responding to all her messages (just some of them) and lying about being in a psych ward when he ignored her for a week, HERE are the receipts for that. She also confronted him about this the day after he broke up with her and he blocked her. He deleted his account and made a new one with another weird cryptic name after ignoring all her other attempts to contact her. Thankfully, I knew his naming conventions and let her know about it. She asked her followers if anyone else had testimony and there were a LOT of anonymous people that talked about Jay abusing them, HERE, HERE, and HERE for example.
Jay’s ex-gf got called out for grooming a minor a few months later so I don’t condone her actions or support her as a person, but that doesn’t negate what Jay did to her and the people that were willing to open up to her. Jay deleted his account and didn’t make a new one for a year. He didn’t post on his Facebook either (can’t say what it was here bc it’s his full name, it’s in the Kiwi Farms thread mentioned further down if interested) but I did see some people tagging him wishing him well. For a while, I almost started to recover, and then when I was 17.8, I saw a very familiar art style in the Warrior cats tags of an OC named Nightheart from BuckyBoi2D (Jay, who was an adult).
I don’t think I have to explain how violating this is. I immediately tried to contact him and he just deleted his account. He deleted his Facebook and his Discord. He FINALLY responded on LinkedIn, saying that he didn’t actually remember that I ever had a Warrior cat OC (not an OC) named Nightheart. Supposedly, he got hit by a car and it gave him a brain injury. He claimed that it made him regress a little and he got back into Warrior Cats. I told him to change his OC’s name to Jayheart and he said he would. I tried to ask him if he’d roleplay WC with me now but he blocked me right before I hit enter.
Given the fact that Jay lied about other things, it’s reasonable to assume that he lied about the brain injury too. His ex-gf (again, don’t condone her as a person) made a Kiwi Farms thread about him and it debunked all the fake injury and manipulation with evidence. I understand that Kiwi Farms is problematic and I don’t support the website as a whole but it’s really spot on in this case. There is a collection of testimony from COUNTLESS people about how awful he is. Jay is a terrible, abusive person who has never changed and continued to hurt people to this day. He fakes health issues to avoid accountability and hides from his victims by changing usernames/deleting accounts. I can’t find his current Tumblr account but the last post he made on the previous one (ImSorryNightyPleaseStop) was a fake suicide note directed at me, where he told me to “stop harassing him” because he has severe depression and it’s making him feel suicidal. Even if that was true, which it’s not, mental illness isn’t an excuse.
After about a year of hiding, he showed up on Artfight with a group of friends that enable/sympathize with him using his stolen Nightheart character. I (17-and-19/10ths year old minor) couldn’t message him (adult) about it because I was already blocked and when I tried to message his friends, they called me a stalker/harasser and told me to leave him alone. I made a second account to confront him and Artfight banned both that and my main account. Despite this, Jay changed his username to PleaseLeaveMeAlone again half a year ago, acknowledging that he KNOWS he did something wrong, and made a new account that I don’t know about yet. If you figure out what it is, please let me know.
I am extremely disappointed in Artfight staff’s handling of this issue. They blocked my accounts for trying to confront my abuser and when I explained that he was abusing me, they told me that they wouldn’t do something without proof. I showed them the Kiwi Farms thread, the ex-gf testimony, my DNI, etc. and they just stopped responding. All I can really do now is hope that this PSA will stop him from getting more victims (I will update once I have his new username). It’s also possible that it will gain enough attention for Artfight to actually DO something, which is honestly disgusting. I shouldn’t have to make a callout for Artfight to do its job and protect victims of abuse from their actual abusers. If you have personal experience with Jay, please let me know (reply/ask/anon all fine) and I’ll add it to this PSA.
Is anyone else in like a weird limbo when it comes to ages? Specifically in roleplay spaces. I'm almost twenty (four weeks) and after weeks of looking for rps for my fandoms I've noticed almost all of those also wanting to rp those fandoms are minors or only roleplay with those 21+. There's been maybe four people on the past two months I could start an rp with and either I just didn't click with them or they ghosted me.
I just feel like I do not see very many people my age role-playing anymore. I know it's not fandoms shrinking, because I see people my age in fandom all the time. I genuinely think chat bots has like ruined rp for my age bracket. I tried them myself like a year or two ago. I do not get the appeal. Moral issues aside it's just no where near as good. And I missed that human connection.
Idk man I don't want people to change their boundaries. Those are important. Just really frustrated.
I just hate the fact I'm scared to roleplay with Hazbin fan accounts because the ones I met are not anti Viv or Idk if they are. And they are all way more fun than the entire show, but that plus their followers seeing I'm anti transphobe, anti predator, etc and trying to break my tumblr doors down. I like rping with them and I wanna show off my oc Mary to interact with them cus they do the characters justice. But I am scared.
Also I have extreme anxiety from past events completely unrelated to fandoms, and struggle to take the first step.
this is your space. you can do whatever you want in your space. that’s the beauty of tumblr. if people don’t like it, they can leave. or they can blacklist the tags.
I don’t want you to feel like you have to sensor yourself or you aren’t welcome in a space you created because a couple of people got uncomfortable. You are wonderful and I love your blog and I just hope you’re doing well
This got long, so my response is under the cut. 💖
While I appreciate this sentiment anon, I personally don't think every post can be lumped under "just scroll away", or "just black-list it", especially in this instance where consent is being called into question.
I'm a big believer in nuance, so if we lump absolutely everything into "just don't look" we risk letting predatory behavior into our safe spaces. On that note, I've noticed quite a few of my amazing mutuals have decided to continue with the RP using an aggressive tagging system, and even going as far as to put in their bio's that they RP, and I hold absolutely no ill will towards them for this. That's their prerogative, whether I agree with it or not doesn't really matter, I'll continue to support the other amazing content they create.
As for me, the other point that some individuals made was that we don't know if the anons are underage, someone with malicious intent, or simply a mutual having fun. This thought made me very uncomfortable, to even think I was unknowingly engaging with a m*n*r in that way makes me ill.
(Though my gut instinct tells me it's a mutual, we may never be sure.)
Pulling my selfies and personal posts is out of an abundance of caution, and I have other social media platforms I can post to; so it's really no loss to me.
I appreciate your kind words of support, I really do. I thank you all for sticking by me, as well as the other users, as we navigate this issue.
I’m really glad you’re not deleting this blog. I’d miss you so much. Lydia left sometime overnight and I’m heartbroken.
Yeah, I noticed around midnight last night she had deactivated.
I'll miss her very much, but I know she had been having a hard time on here in regards to anon hate, and it seemed like it had been really taking a toll on her. So, hopefully no longer interacting in fandom space will help her mental health. Perhaps she'll come back when she's well enough, if not I wish her the very best.
Also, a side note, because I feel like a huge reason Lydia left was feeling shame at her own sexuality, my blog is a sex positive space. With emphasism on female and disabled individuals sexuality, as I am female and physically disabled. Often times disabled people aren't seen as sexual beings capable of having agency over their own body, and that's simply untrue.
If anyone has any questions or wants to simply talk, vent, etcetera, my DM's and Asks are always open. 💖
oh no please don’t delete!! :( your content is so wonderful and ik i speak for a lot of ppl when i say that you & the energy you bring would be dearly missed </3
Hello sweet anon, thank you for these kind words.
While I've decided not to delete my blog, I will be taking a step back from sharing my personal explicit thoughts and feelings. At least for a little while, a few days at the most probably.
Again, I'm extremely sorry to anyone I made uncomfortable. I recognize and understand this was a breach of consent for many people, as they didn't necessarily sign up for such a sexualized experience involving me personally, versus just reading explicit posts written by me as an author concerning fictional entities.
I'll add this as well, I am an 18+ blog. I always will be. If I found out you are under 18, or you have no age in your bio, you'll get an automatic block from me.
