I had this idea, so I had to share it because- *chefs kiss* it is SO them~
So remember in season four, when Dean and Cas have that moment where no words are needed and they had a mutual understanding that Castiel was going to risk it all for dean?
Well..... what if...... something similar happened in the finale?
🤔😏
Alternate Ending:
"Why does this sound like a goodbye?" Dean begins to tear up. He can’t lose Cas...
"Because it is.” Castiel sheds a tear and he hugs Dean for the last time. He holds on tightly and absorbs every last second for the moment. Dean reluctantly pulls away to look at Cas not ready for his time with Cas to come to and end. “I love you." Castiel confesses, still holding Dean in his arms.
"Don't do this Cas- Cas." Dean searches Castiel’s eyes for an answer, another way, anything but goodbye. Good things don’t last. Not in his experience. Dean squeezes Cas a bit tighter, and everything in him wanted to let go but he didn’t want to. He didn’t want this to end, not now and not ever. This can’t be happening...
"Goodbye, Dean." Castiel gazes into Deans eyes for the last time; a lingering gaze.
Dean steals a glance as Cas’ lips and gulps. He looks away for a moment and Castiel leans forward, seeking Dean’s face. Dean hesitantly looks back up at him and Cas subtly nods, reassuring him.
Dean furrows his brows and parts his lips, as to say something more, before slowly nodding. Castiel kisses Dean for the last first time. Cas pulls away and Dean slowly opens his eyes. He silently begs Cas not to go.
Castiel wishes with everything in him that he could stay with Dean just a little bit longer, but their time was up. The door was being broken down and they would no longer be alone. Cas pushes Dean away, leaving him only able to watch as he is seized by the empty. The last Dean sees of Castiel is a brave smile. Dean sits in shock, replaying the events that had just occurred in his mind. He sheds a tear.
Thanks for reading 🥺🥲 I got a little emotional writing this and I hope you enjoy it!
I wrote a little coda for “Despair” because I had FEELINGS.
Spoilers, obviously, for Supernatural season 15 and episode 18 specifically.
Everything is Blue || Dean/Cas || 4,909 words
Castiel is in the Empty, leaving only his confessions and his handprint behind. To Dean, everything seems black.
Until it's not.
Tags:
CodaEpisode: s15e18, Despair, Angst with a Happy Ending, Castiel is Saved, Dean Winchester Uses Actual Words, Heaven is Falling, In Fact Everything is Falling, Except Dean and Cas because they fell years ago, Requited Love, Pining, Mutual Pining, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Castiel Lives (Supernatural), Supportive Sam Winchester, Supportive Jack Kline, Dean Winchester is Bad at Feelings, But he finally gets it, Fix-It, Grief/Mourning, Reunions, HAPPY ENDING.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27449200
SO. y’all. my peeps. i haven’t been this excited since the end of season 5. i am simply quaking from this becoming canon. i knew of destiel before i had even heard of supernatural. i'm weak, okay? WEAK. and upset. so very very, upset. but, this is only the first chapter of destiel’s journey into canon. IT’S NOT OVER YET.
if the destiel confession had been in the finale i would have been simply obliterated. but guys. my dudes. IT’S NOT. and that’s where my hope shines the brightest. there is no chance that sam, dean, and jack can canonically allow cas to die permanently like this—doing so would betray the core of each of their characters. the writing simply cannot allow that, it would destroy the very foundation of the show.
thusly i present my argument that cas will be brought back, probably very dramatically, giving dean a chance to respond to his confession. and boy, oh, boy, am i excited to see it. misha gave us a beautiful opening act, and guys, it’s only the first act. the rest of this play is going to illustrate the stunning conclusion, the one that has been building for eleven seasons.
it’s going to take it back to sam and dean, the brothers forever united. dean and cas, the love that even heaven and hell couldn't tear apart. sam, dean, cas, and jack, the found family built amidst such tragedy yet strong enough to withstand the wrath of god, a family just able to carry on. and y’all, it’s going to be glorious.
A'right. I know no one needs this, but after spending a weekend watching old Supernatural and reading fandom posts...I have thoughts.
I think what s15xe18 (apparently) did to Dean and Castiel is...fitting. And it is a terrible embodiment of a horrible trope...that actually fits into the show universe in a nasty, twisty way.
I don't mean this as a homophobic statement. It is a bit of a ride, though-- and, obviously, spoilers past the cut.
GIF by fruiitycas (s05xe03)
“When humans want something...we lie.”
“Why?”
“Because that’s how you become President.”
(We’ll come back to this.)
When Castiel first appears, he is all hammer, as Dean puts it. He’s there to do a job. He has orders.
GIF by winchester--bros-4-life (s04xe01)
That doesn’t last long. Seven episodes later, he’s confiding in Dean...
GIF by I’m in the stars tonight (s04xe07)
...and not too long after that, he’s full-on rebelling. From the point Castiel decides to side with Dean (and to a lesser extent, Sam), he spends his time in a push/pull tension that never really quite leaves the character-- as far as I can tell, EVER:
Castiel is an Angel of the Lord. He’s not made for free will. He IS his garrison’s best strategist, though, so he does the next best thing -- he watches, and then he tries to apply the “lessons” in self-determination, such as they are.
He mostly watches Dean.
GIF by I don’t understand that reference (I don’t know which episode this is, but take your pick.)
Over time, Castiel gets better at making his own decisions, but he’s never great at it. It’s always hard. He watches too much, he doubts himself, and he tries too hard.
He gets really good at reading Dean, though.
And time doesn’t flow the same way for angels as it does for humans-- Castiel mentions it several times.
GIF by you fought for this whole world (s05xe04)
(Couple of things, here:
“Is it Zachariah?” - present tense, not past, despite the fact that, according to Castiel himself, the angels have left Earth by endverse 2014. He’s orienting himself according to past-Dean’s timeline, almost seamlessly.
and
“Interesting.” - not “You could change this,” which is what everyone starts hammering past-Dean with when endverse!Dean (and endverse!Sam) get over their shock at the body-double. Even at the end of the world, Castiel is trying to spare Dean...something.)
(Unrelated to this larger diversion, but while we’re on Endverse...Castiel knew what endverse!Dean meant to do:
GIF by castiels-tight-grip (s05xe04))
Castiel knowing how Dean reacts to things, and Castiel observing Dean’s desire to NOT talk about it...well-established, as is Castiel watching Dean for cues on how to...be. So far, pretty bog-standard canon, yes?
Oh, Death...
Both Castiel and Dean die...a LOT. It’s handy Dean has a special relationship with big-D Death, isn’t it?
GIF by dean-squad (s05xe21)
Death is one of the few things that gets presented as more powerful than God. There are...a few others. The most important thing to know, Supernatural-canon-wise, is that when you meet one of these... Let’s call them “Absolutes”... they will be bound by at least one absolute law. There’s only a few entities that punch at this weight in the Supernatural universe. Death is one, and the Empty another.
The Absolutes. A weekend of selective binge-watching has taught me that they have more power than anything, but they cannot break their (few) laws. Death will reap even God, but can be killed by their own scythe. The Empty absorbs dead demons, monsters, angels, and demigods...but the monsters and demigods have to accept it; the Empty cannot break its own “rules.”
GIF by starlightcastiel (s13xe04)
As I mentioned above, Castiel dies several times. He usually has a ‘get out of jail’ card handy...but at the end of season 12, it looked pretty serious. Castiel was stabbed with an angel blade...by Lucifer. We even get the classic “The angel has left the building” animation:
GIF by dandelion-teabag (s12xe22)
And then we learn: Castiel did die...and he was sent where all dead angels go, to the Empty (not “It’s a Wonderful Life”). When first confronted with the Empty, Castiel bluffs it, then out-faces it, because he is, at heart, a fighter-- and “Thursday’s child has far to go”
GIF by starlightcastiel (s13xe04)
If he and Dean talked about this (doubtful), I’m sure Dean was laudatory -- Dean does practically the same thing to Death on several occasions.
GIF by purgatoryking (s06xe11)
Of course, Dean and Castiel can’t simply sass their way to true happiness, because that would be a different show. Eventually the counterfeit checks they’re trying to cash are going to catch up with both of them...because the Absolutes cannot bend their own rules.
“It’s getting dark, too dark to see...”
By roughly...season 14? 15? we’ve arrived at a point where Castiel has gone from reflecting Dean’s own choices back at him...
GIF by inacatastrophicmind (s04xe20)
...to one where he’s trying to make his own choices almost completely independently.
GIF by inacatastropicmind (s12xe22)
While Dean has gone from a healthy respect for anthropomorphic semi-deities...
GIF by octomoosey (s5xe21)
...to an ...uhhhh... whatever you call this...
GIF by sasquatchandleatherjacket (s13xe19)
(Note for folks who haven’t kept up with the show, as I haven’t -- that’s Billie, a Reaper who has taken over as ‘capital-D Death’ after Dean, uh, killed the first one...)
Both Castiel and Dean have grown! Good for them! Except... for the part where their own core natures are going to doom them anyway!
At...some point in season 14 or 15... Castiel makes a deal with the Empty to save his adopted-ish son, Jack. The terms of the deal? The Empty gets to claim Castiel if he is ever truly happy (because Castiel died, and dead angels go to the nothingness, the Empty can’t break rules).
Meanwhile, Dean and co. are embroiled in their usual, saving the world from some form of desolation. While doing so, he and Castiel (and Sam, one assumes) run into Chuck, who is ‘capital-G God.’ And God has this to say to Castiel:
GIF by inacatastrophicmind (s15xe17)
This is devastating in several ways. For one, God is a real dick. But also, the context is that God ran a great many universes...and they are now all living through the only one where predictable reality has gone off the rails. Even God can’t save you now-- his powers have been broken.
The endgame, then-- in s15xe18, Dean had Billie, Death herself, after him. Now Dean, being Dean, has decided that correct order of operations is that:
(a) he’s been so damn stupid, of course he’s an idiot and everyone is going to die and it’s all his fault (and on-and-on in true Dean-Winchester-self-flagellating style)
(b) and naturally he should die, because it’s what he deserves.
But Castiel has learned to make his own decisions, remember? And he learned long, long ago that he and Dean don’t talk about this kind of thing-- unless they’re going to fight about it:
GIF by spnsmile (s09xe10)
Maybe they’ve both been stupid, if for the right reasons, but Castiel is staring down a choice between everyone dying...or he calls in something in the same Absolute weight-class as Death, and only a few beings die. And in order to do that, he has to be...happy.
Which means he has to share how he feels... He hasn’t talked about it before because what do humans do when faced with something they want? They lie.
But now he has to say something. And without arguing with Dean or triggering his own guilt complex by weighing Dean down with something selfish that (Castiel thinks) Dean doesn’t want.
Which is how we get from here (s05xe22) ...
...to here (s15xe18).
GIF by deanwifechester
Is it fucking terrible and rage-inducing that Castiel got taken by the Empty almost immediately after saying his one true thing, in a meta way where we’re all so, so tired of LGBTQIA+ representation that is winked at or lampshaded or immediately turned into the ‘motivating sacrifice’? Fuck yes, it’s terrible.
Did the show earn that move, even if Castiel is for-real-really-gone-gone-dead? Was there the characterization of these two and the necessary world-building? Did they put in the work, build the rules? Also, frustratingly, yes.
Because what’s the alternative? Twelve years and no growth, no change? (You can say “Growth and change and they live,” but that’s for fix-it fic...)
Even if Dean thinks he wants his life to remain fixed, that’s always been one of his failings - and a fantasy.
GIF by castiels-tight-grip (s05xe04)
...And ladies, gents, and others - I give you my first, and probably my last serious, earnest Supernatural meta. Yikes.
