#saddbitchposts

[saddbitchposts]

Been in such a nostalgic mood lately. It’s been bittersweet to say the least.

[saddbitchposts]

I often find myself over sharing

With people who don’t deserve to know

The real me

Perhaps it’s just because

I’m thankful that anyone can hear me

[saddbitchposts]

Every time I catch myself

Thinking about you

I push to

Love myself

Harder

2 AM Struggles, C.B. 2/18/2026 @02:02

[saddbitchposts]

The loneliness is starting to creep in. I really shouldn’t say creep because it’s starting to grow a voice and become very LOUD. I’ve been celibate for almost 2 years. My heart broken at the last encounter. I have no one that I’ve dated and as of the last year, I don’t bother to talk to anyone either. I’m content most days, but the past few months have been rough. What I’m seeing though, is the difference between me being single now and me being single before, is the fact that I’m not open to letting anyone play with my heart or waste my time. I don’t know everything I want but I do know I want love, care, trust, effort, intention, connection. Perhaps all this time I have allowed nonsense to occur, to keep from feeling this emptiness. The necklace of anxiety that’s both choking me and its pendant of worry weighs heavily on my chest. I’m up late right now because I can’t sleep. Because I’m afraid to sleep. Why? Idk. I’ve been afraid of going to sleep for going on a year now. No reason, just had a panic attack a few times before bed and now I don’t sleep unless my body forces me to. Perhaps sex used to keep that away. Or maybe talking on the phone and falling asleep to the faces I loved. Or maybe the comforting thought of someone loving me all day- even if it was a lie, I could wake up to that again.

I’m not really sure. But I do know that, when I was engaging with people it brought me so much pain. But the last few heartbreaks fucked me up mentally. Like, it took something from me. And I don’t know how much I have left to take so I’m just trying to avoid it. But I’d be a fucking liar if I didn’t say that I am lonely and I wish I had love and I wish I had someone to care for me. And that is a small part of my truth. Honestly.

[saddbitchposts]

There is no reward for suffering

And just to let you know

You do not gain the heart of a man by being complacent

You get no closer to him by doing what he asks

You only get the pleasure of being put to use

Picked up only when necessary

When you are quiet

When you are convenient

When you do not offer push back

When you are not anything

No sign of struggle

And when the time comes

And he looks for a challenge

The excitement of something new

He will do away with you

Hard Truths, C.B., 5/3/2026 @18:12

[saddbitchposts]

And sometimes, people don’t come back. They do not care about righting their wrongs.

[saddbitchposts]

Let’s be clear

The things you should’ve done

You didn’t do

So there should be no question

About why it’s FUCK YOU

Clean Sweep, C.B. 1/1/2026 @03:06

[saddbitchposts]

I’ve been picking up my pen a lot lately

Trying my best to finish this sapphic fiction

But I keep thinking about you

Trying to push all my thoughts away

Or just make them sexual

But I’m left in a mess of confusion

Still after all this time

Because I know it wasn’t real

And yet I know you were still mine

I was yours

Perhaps I still belong to you

I’m unsure

But I wish I didn’t think about you anymore

But I do

And boy do I miss you

Council sickness in full swing

And though I still remember everything

Like how you lied to me

Said you were deleting your account

That bitch has still been up

how you said I was number one

And I wasn’t even in the run

I laugh to myself about

how I could be so naive

How I feel so stupid

For continuing to grieve

A man who played with me

A man who promised me everything

Knowing we would never be

Because he had already made his choice

And it was never going to be me

-Letter to My Loving Coward, C.B. 4/26/2026 @18:06