Thoughts on debbie being clingy with Ruth and no one else
ughh yeah main thought is there is no heterosexual reason.
i just tweeted about this 😱 it’s almost like we were talking about it or something
It seems like part of the cling is bc Debbie relies on Ruth to validate her life choices and emotions...like nothing is real unless Ruthie says/shows it is. This isn’t always healthy and sometimes borders on codependent (though they’re def healing but yeah):
1x01: tells ruth to start a family like she did
2x06: wants ruth to feel the pain she feels
2x10: ruth says she’s happily dating, so debbie says she’s gotta start dating
3x05: tells ruth to play the role that she plays
3x07: ruth just said she was in love w s*m, so she’s gotta find a relationship
3x10: tells ruth to be a part of the network she’s president of bc how can she be at the top without ruthie
She also clings in part bc Debbie feels powerless in the world around her (especially at the start of the series) so clings to that power over ruth. but when she might just lose ruth in 2x07 bc she went too far, she actually humiliates herself and writes an apology in sharpie, so she’s not just in it for power over ruth. in fact she grows a lot after 2x07, and i think esp given what we’re told of their relationship before the start of the series, how debbie relinquishes control in end of season 2 and throughout season 3 is huge. in their relationship, debbie giving up control is clearly an act of vulnerability and love (and for ruth, i’d argue taking control and telling debbie what she wants and needs is an act of vulnerability and love).
Ruth is also probably the only person she can be honest with, have an honest conversation with (like she says in 1x09 it’s clear that means a lot to her) and sees her beyond a surface level and finds that valid. I think that’s scary for Debbie so she clings to it and pushes it away. I think she relies on it so much though...I mean, after refusing to be in the same house as Mark in 1x04, she can’t help but stay by the pool near Ruth for a bit of comfort and peace.
I also think Debbie clings to the inaccurate way Ruth sees her too. Like Debbie’s not shiny, Debbie doesn’t get everything she wants. But Ruth seeing her that way, makes her feel larger than life, it must feel really good to feel Ruth worship her in that way when she feels like crap so often.
She also I think values the way Ruth sees the world, which is so idealistic it borders on insane sometimes. But I think she likes to be around that because meanwhile she’s off believing her only value is what men define it as. But she also finds that a threat at the same time bc she’s so used to self limiting. But in the end I think she grows a lot bc of Ruth’s idealism as I’ve said. She becomes a better wrestler bc of Ruth. She probably was just going to ask for more money in 2x01 but when Ruth directs, I think Debbie thinks to demand her place as producer, etc